Betsy, the only point that I can see where someone may be mean it when saying it's a stupid point. I actually agree, but maybe being more tactful about it was what was lacking.
I don't really understand the point someone wat trying to make when they say that we need to look to our parents for what happened at MMS?
Afterall, part of the problem is you can't be critical of the school without being called 'manipulative' and also, parents aren't really there- they have no idea....
And, again, in many ways the entire methodology of MMS and schools like it seems so barbaric and 'middle ages' to me that it's hard to understand why anyone would defend it as a viable alternative to real help offered by real professional who have qualifications to do so.
It seems to me indicative of a much larger societal problem involving many factors, but especially they was in which parents really can't afford to be parents anymore and it's a rat race for economic survival. I'm sure the problems are much more complex than that- but far as I can tell parents are not only struggling to afford the life they are accustumed to, to offer kids the best when the best means a much easier life than not. People are not taught to be good parents nor good citizens and it seems to me, as consequence our 'democracy' is failing miserabley, kids are behaving in ways that are reflective of this hypocracy- parents are citizens of the 'free' society but feel helpless as citizens. On the one hand the push for equal oppurtunity with the reality that most of us won't get that- there are certain requirements to reach the upper echilons of power- namely you're a man, white and connected. This heirarchy and clear oppression of many is much easier to see as a kid I think, before you've nromalized the whole thing in your mind, in your goals/ideals and in your language. As I see it, parents are the problem, but society as a whole has a much bigger problem that involves who yields the power in our society, who esablishes the framework in which we all have to exist?
IT's also the contention of the typical crisis of liberalism- rights of capitalists vs. human rights. where do the rights of kids come into play if it interferes with so many people making so much money?
We have a group of elite few that makethe rules we play by and they don't want to value the work of the home- it invades the private realm (and yet somehow government involvement in marriage isn't to personal, right?) , what has been traditionally women's labor and women are tired of getting the shitty end of the deal (being domestic laborers with no pay, limited involvment in public realm outside of home) but until family life is restructured and as a society we begin to value as a public service the work of the home. we will have many unahppy women- frequently isolated (rightly so, I think- we're social creature who need to feel pride and accomplishment, and not just via our children!)or women that have to balance work outside of the home with home responsibilities ... stay at home dads make up less than 1% of the population and women still make less than men. I guess what I'm saying here is that women and men (they pay a heavy price for this structure too) can't be the best parents they are capable of being if they are unhappy and struggling- constantly stressed and worried.
I see this as a far more complex problem that is indicative of our current state on a much larger scale. I think the world kids are growing up in today is so complicated and to filter out truth from falsehood is getting increasingly difficult. One the one hand, like family life for instance, we say women are free to work, what more do they want? It's not that simple. You have to aknowledge the structure that has been present from the past to allow present to be what it is and address the coercive elements. But most people don't really think that way, don't examine things much deeper than, 'they are free now, what are they complaining about' same goes for blacks, immigrants, etc. My sense is teens, esp outcasts feel this hypocracy deeply and act out. Instead of trying to sort any of this out we send them to boot camps to excersize their pains, as if pain is only personal injury- and societal problems are not...
I will tell you I always felt so ashamed at having money while I would see people living on the streets, that immigrants from my famlies coutnry had to beg for jobs from us and that many people thought they were superior to the poor and to immigrants. I found it repulsive and it was one of the many reasons why I was so miserable. There was no place to become empowered and certainly MMS did not give that to me.
Empowerment was not something I obtained at MMS, they neither gave me the oppurtunity nor the resources nor the support to grow strong. They tore me down, broke my spirit, killed my ability to think, robbed my of a few years of education and left me dizzy with rhetoric to boot.[ This Message was edited by: katfish on 2005-08-08 08:33 ]