I had to take a step back for a couple of days. This is just becoming overwhelming. I had some surgery & stuff, and I feel really beaten down right now. Now I feel guilty for my "time out" while a child is suffering.
Deborah, you are such a sweetheart. Thanks for all the links! There is so much information out there, and so much propaganda also. I got an email from the child's mother with a link to a "study" that shows just how very effective Redcliff's program is. She is trying to defend what she has done to the child, and present it as a "good thing". The study she sent me was by Dr. Aldana (BYU). I looked at Redcliff's website, and they use this as part of their "Research" information. They also use research from Dr. Russell (U. of Idaho), and then they combine the two for an overall picture of recovery. It sure looks good. VERY favorable results.
Unfortunately, the mother only reads what she wants to read (and she's a bit "literacy challenged" to begin with) and she failed to consider the source of all this glowing research.
I found Dr. Aldana's Curriculum Vitae, and he is on the BOARD OF DIRECTORS AT REDCLIFF.
The second study was performed by Dr. Keith Russell and the Outdoor Behavioral Healthcare Research Cooperative. I found that between 1998 and 2003, much of Dr. Russell's research has been funded by grants (6 grants totaling $228,000) from the OBHIC (Outdoor Behavioral Healthcare Industry Council).
The connection? Redcliff is a very involved member of the OBHIC. Steve Petersen (Redcliff owner & founder) is on the OBHIC's committees for Standards & Quality, and is the Chair of Staffing. Scott Petersen (another owner & founder of Redcliff) is on OBHIC's MARKETING & MEDIA RELATIONS COMMITTEE. Jim Salisbury (same thing, you get the idea here) is on the OBHIC Staffing Committee. Now, I'm not saying the research is invalid or even questionable. I'm just saying I (if I were a parent looking for wilderness therapy for a child) would want, AND EXPECT, Redcliff to note this information along with the research results. The website calls these "two independent studies". Well, the two studies were DONE independently of each other. I hope intelligent parents will look a bit deeper than that, before accepting any research.
I would like to see research on the outcome for a child who is placed there when his psychological evaluation determined his placement there was not necessary, and could even be counter-productive. Even Dr. Russell said in one of his papers that Wilderness Therapy is seen as a treatment option for SERIOUSLY TROUBLED adolescents not being reached by traditional forms of treatment. In our case, the child had visited a family counselor with his mother twice in the past 6 months. No effort was made to give this child a chance, before he was picked up and taken to Utah. Does Redcliff have any responsibility for accepting a child who doesn't need to be there? Is there ANY child they won't accept? Maybe one whose parents can't afford $425 a day?
What we are doing now is going to take so long, it won't be helpful in getting him out of there. We are trying very hard to ACCEPT that we can't help him. That's not easy. What Redcliff is doing to the child, they are also doing to us. Isolating the parent from the child, and putting us all in a situation where we have no rights. They are trying to beat us down emotionally and make us give up. For us, we DO have recourse....but it will take a long time, and does the child no good. At a minimum, we hope to be able to prevent this from happening to anyone else. Every day we are checking the weather reports for Utah, trying to empathize with what he is going through. It somehow makes us feel a bit closer to him. I know that sounds bizarre, but it's all we have to make us feel like we are in touch with his day-to-day life. We are that desperate. My husband still writes him letters. But now the therapist (with whom my husband gets a 15-minute telephone call once per week) says this is not helpful, and she wants the child to only receive one letter from his father, and one from his mother, per week. No mail from other relatives. Our hands are tied. We can't disregard what she says....She is our lifeline to him...our only contact....and we can't lose that.
My husband spoke to Redcliff's attorney on the phone. More roadblocks and brick walls. He indicated the fact my husband has joint legal custody of the child is virtually meaningless. The court order from NH (saying my husband has access to all records) will not be recognized. The consent form signed by the mother allows him only very limited access, to a few documents of Redcliff's choosing. What is wrong with these people? Redcliff's Director of Admissions refuses to communicate with my husband AT ALL. Nobody will explain why we've been told 3 different (and increasingly complicated) versions of what would be required to withdraw the child.....when Redcliff's own enrollment contract states their policy is to allow any parent to withdraw the child. They don't even care about the custodial status of that parent. They will simply allow him to be withdrawn. Why do they have a different policy for us? They refuse to explain. The last requirement that was stated (needing a court order from UTAH) was the one the Director refused to put in writing. Why? Do they plan to deny saying it? Yes, we've thought about recording conversations, but it's not legal here. I'm sure they know this, so they don't worry about what they say on the phone.
The mother has refused to give us custody (even though we received her offer in writing last month, and she said glowing things about our ability to provide good parenting for him). We have considered having a third party take custody, but there is only one good option there, and I don't think they'd be willing to change their lifestyle to do it. And the mother would refuse to do that anyway. She's afraid if someone else has the child, she'll have to give up her child support payments.
We have someone in our corner now, and will know more next week about what will happen next. In the meantime, we are working on ways to deal with the frustration of not being able to help him. Sometimes it is just overwhelming, not knowing what he's going through, and worrying that he will resent us for being unable to help him. Just overwhelming. Thanks for the support!