Jeff Leugers Fan Club

[Cayo Hueso]

That's where I think the real tragedy is.  I can get over any of the 'things' that were done to us in there, but taking us in our most vulnerable years (on many, many different levels) and forging this steel trap of self loathing and defeatism.  THAT is the lasting effect that place has on me.  We were so ill-equipped to deal with real life when we got out of that place, whether it be by running or graduating.  It took that time period that we were supposed to be learning and growing and physically fucked that with peanut butter diets, sleep deprivation, starvation...some girls ended up not menstrating for months or years.  What kind of physical and emotional stress has to happen for that[/b] to occur.  Then THAT wasn't enough....they have to 'break' us of all survival skills that we had at the time (and some of us had other abuses that we DEPENDED ON THOSE SURVIVAL SKILL FOR OUR VERY SURVIVAL) and replace them with some twisted, perverted version of how to live life.

I'm sorry, that is unforgivable for me at the moment.

You know, too many weirdos out there. At least with you people I know WHY you are weird!!!

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Straight_Inc_Alumni/' target='_new'>Kady

[The Butcher]

I've been dealing just fine. If it weren't for Straight, I might have never discovered the sheer pleasure of cold-blooded murder.  :grin:

[RTP2003]

Look, all I'm doing is advocating suicide for ex-Staff who won't make the same kind of effort against the program now as they did for the program then.  If any of them takes my suggestion and puts it to use, that's great--the world will be a little bit better without them.

This little semantic game you're playing regarding "winning" or "losing" being based on how I feel about my experience in Straight is ridiculous.  Try your pop-psychobabble somewhere else.

We all fight the program in different ways.  Some of us dose the coffee urns at NA meetings with LSD.  Some of us send emails to places that are currently employing abusers.  Some of us picket outside Mel's house.  And some of us encourage ex-Staff to kill themselves.  We all do our part.

[Cayo Hueso]

On 2004-03-26 09:25:00, RTP2003 wrote:




We all fight the program in different ways.  Some of us dose the coffee urns at NA meetings with LSD.  

 :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:

maybe if someone would have done that at the NA meeting I went to I would have stayed.  What a wonderful idea!!!!!!!!

The law in its majestic equality, forbids all men to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread - the rich as well as the poor

--Anatole France

_________________
St. Pete Straight
early 80s[ This Message was edited by: cayohueso on 2004-03-26 09:31 ]

[The Butcher]

Ears and noses will be the trophies of the day.

[Don Smith]

Then why do you have such a pro-Straight attitude? In many of your posts it seems like you have some sort of nostalgia for Straight.  

 :question:
What recent pro-Straight posts have you been reading? I certainly don't consider my views on the program to be positive anymore.
 :question:

Don

[RTP2003]

You only changed your (public) views because everybody posting on your alumni board had anti-Straight views.  I think you still look back with fond memories of all the good times you had in Straight.  If you have really changed, show it.  Drive a car bomb into Miller's house or something like that.  You were on Staff, and are guilty until you make a significant effort on behalf  of the Str8h8ers.

[Don Smith]

"You only changed your (public) views because everybody posting on your alumni board had anti-Straight views.  I think you still look back with fond memories of all the good times you had in Straight.

 :lol:  :lol: So you THINK I look back with fond memories.  Well let me tell you Mark, what you think and what you know are two completly different things.

Yes people posted anti-Straight views on the Alumni site.  Just how in hell do you think I came to change my views?  I actually READ them and after some time, began to see the hell others there went through there.

[Anonymous]

So do you feel any remorse for participating in the abuse by being on Staff?  If so, how do you deal with it and what have you done to help in the fight against the program and its followers and sympathisers? You should be held to a higher standard than those who suffered in Straight.  You were on Staff, and by being on Staff, you actively helped to perpetuate the cycle of systematic abuse that went on, even if you did not physically or psychologically abuse others personally.  You made the choice to be on Staff, and if you have any decency whatsoever, you will make up for it by helping to destroy the program, now known as DFAF (and its offshoots, like KHK) and its loyalists.

[RTP2003]

me again--keep forgetting to log in.

[Don Smith]

So do you feel any remorse for participating in the abuse by being on Staff?

Yes, I am sorry I ever went on Staff.  BIGGEST mistake of my life.  But not becaue I participated in abuse.  I didn't do that.  And when I saw it happen, I actually confronted a Senior Staff member for going too far with a client. A Trainee confronting a Senior wasn't something that happened too often, but I did it.

I'm not going to argue with you anymore on this subject because it's baseless.  Hold me to what ever standard you want.  

My way of fighting the program is providing a place for people to discuss what happened to us in Straight. That's my contibution to the cause.  I think that this and other discussion groups help prevent suicides something you seem to endorse.

Good day

Don

[Anonymous]

You are right, Don, I do endorse suicide.  Particularly for ex-staff that aren't doing anything to destroy the program and its supporters.

As far as your "contribution"-- it may have turned into a place where the Straight experience can be discuseed, but your original intent was to reunite with other Straightlings and get nostalgic about fun on Staff.

Also, I don't think that confronting a Sr. staff member one time makes up for helping to perpetuate the abuse.  Unless you were taking notes for HRS while you were there, or doing some behind the scenes work to fuck up the program, you are as responsible as the other Staff you worked with.  Co-labored with. Collaborated with.

[RTP2003]

On 2004-03-26 12:05:00, Anonymous wrote:

"You are right, Don, I do endorse suicide.  Particularly for ex-staff that aren't doing anything to destroy the program and its supporters.



As far as your "contribution"-- it may have turned into a place where the Straight experience can be discuseed, but your original intent was to reunite with other Straightlings and get nostalgic about fun on Staff.



Also, I don't think that confronting a Sr. staff member one time makes up for helping to perpetuate the abuse.  Unless you were taking notes for HRS while you were there, or doing some behind the scenes work to fuck up the program, you are as responsible as the other Staff you worked with.  Co-labored with. Collaborated with.

"

Me again.

[The Butcher]

[Don Smith]

As far as your "contribution"-- it may have turned into a place where the Straight experience can be discuseed, but your original intent was to reunite with other Straightlings and get nostalgic about fun on Staff.

You have all the anwers don't you?  You started this thread by making the outrageous notion that Jeff Leugers committing suicide was somehow noble.  Assuming of course that he did it because of his involement with Staff at Straight.  Fact is no one but God and Jeff knows why he killed himself. Straight may or may not have played a part in it.

When I say something about how I feel about your thread you falsly accuse me of having a pro-Straight opinion, again this is based on nothing specific, just what you THOUGHT!

Then you tell us that all Staff should be held to a higher standard and if they aren't "doing something" then they should kill themselves. Again this is what you THINK and frankly is pretty sick.

Yes, the Straight Inc. Alumni site started off as a pro-Straight site, but certainly not to get nostalgic about fun on Staff!  There was no fun on Staff.  I had no friends on Staff. I nearly took my own life on Staff because of the way I was treated by the other Staff members there. Reporting anything to HRS wasn't something that I thought about doing at the time.  

You need to understand that when I started the Alumni site, I was uneducated in what really happened and I was completly blind to it.  Since then my eyes have been opened.

But who are you to say that because I was on Staff I have to do anything just so I'll be somehow redeemed in your eyes?  I've made my peace with the people that I think I did wrongs to. I've become a better person because of the people I've met in this and other forums.  I don't owe you squat!

Don't forget to login when you reply.

Don