Me too. My daughter seemed to have entirely lost her mind there for awhile. The differences between the situation she chose for herself and the Program were subtle. How ironic, huh? But they were important differences. The moment she decided she wanted out, she had every kind of help and support on tap. The cops would not arrest her for running away, we would not change the locks and kick her out but, instead, make a big cherry cheesecake w/ french cream then go on a weeks long shopping, decorating and home improvement spree to celebrate her return home.
Instead of trying to force her into "finding her bottom", we just stayed on her side, regardless, till she decided she'd had enough. Might she have been killed somehow? Sure. It happens. Thankfully, in our case, it did not. Like most people who go a bit overboard as teenagers, my daughter decided to get her act together and start working toward things like education, income, her own car, etc. all on her own.
But, unlike you, I know what happens when parents
do send their kids off for thought-reform treatment. Death and insanity are fairly common outcomes from this kind of treatment. Just try and track down some sort of documentation for that laughable 98% success rate they claim. You won't find it, it's a total fabrication.
First, we're really not kidding about the high number of suicides among former Program clients or the cooralation between Program recruiting grounds and increases in teen suicide and serious depression. That means that, for example, the teen suicide rate went from 1 to 6 in Cape Coral during the year or two that a Straight program was open there. Doesn't mean your son will necessarily become suicideal. But it's a pretty safe bet that some of the kids he knew and, maybe, became attached to in the Program will not see their 30th birthdays. It's heartbreaking looking up old friends from the Program. I hardly ever dare to do it because either the news is not good or they don't want to be found and reminded of our weird little shared history.
There's little chance that you'll ever have back the kind of trust that we all need to have in our parents. Yes, I know, he's "doing well", coloring inside the lines and all that. But you just don't know what you're saying when you repeat the mantra that the Program saved his sorry, hopeless ass. It's as cruel a statement as telling a rape victim that they were never raped and they shouldn't go around saying such awful things about dear old Uncle Joe or Fr. Cassian. And you do
not know what would have happened if you had not put him in the Program. I have news for you! Lots of kids get high on cough syrup. Many, many go pretty crazy w/ drugs for awhile. Very few people stick w/ habits that have really debilitating consequences.
And how do you know that all the tinkering and tampering by all the shrinks and counselors didn't contribute to his problems? Ever been on the receiving end of that kind of "help"? Every time I read or hear a parent repeat
that mantra "We tried everything; shrinks, drug treatment, this, that, whatever... nothing worked!" (oh yes, dear, it goes all the way back to Art Barker and The Seed, at least!) I wonder if it ever occured to them to just not mess with the kid for awhile.
The greater the ignorance the greater the dogmatism.
--William Osler
