thank you anon.
p.s.
i hold no metaphorical club to beat anyone with these days. yes i was fuked up when i went into kids and was REALLY fuked up when i was pulled, and i guess for the last 18 years i blocked out so much of that place that finding this forum is litterally opening a Pandoras Box for me and i havn't figured out if it's a good thing or a bad thing yet. i've been seeing numerous psychotherapists over these last 18 years, most can't figure out what to do with me, i still have anger problems from time to time, YES i drink and get stoned sometimes(not to excess), but i CERTAINLY CARRY NO METAPHORICAL CLUB FOR ANYONE. i'm seeing my most recent shrink tomorrow and plan to spend most of the time talking about kids. it's been 18 years. i guess it's about time i talk to someone about that place.
till i pull the plug,
later
kb