On 2003-12-03 15:32:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I know for a fact that my child will die or end up killing somebody or be in prison....it's that bad.
...
I do have an idea what I would personally do but, I am just asking for what some of you would do or a parent that has no past history with therapy or abuse in anyway.
I'm right there with ya'. Actually, quite a bit ahead, I'm guessing. My oldest is 19 and she just returned to our family home after about 3 years w/ a boyfriend to whome we affectionately refered as "Psycho Boy". We don't mention him at all, any more. Thank God, we don't have to!
Maybe I'm biased. I've heard that we forget just what total bratts we were as we get older. But I don't think I or any of my 4 brothers and sister who went throught The Seed and Straight were half as wreckless as our daughter was for a short while.
We basically took the TOUGHLOVE hategroup philosophy, turned it around and played it backward. I shit you not, I sometimes hear my mother's grating voice in my head (not like an aditory haleucination or anything, just regular memory) bitching at me for being an enabler or a cop out or a poor example. I nearly always answer back "Thanks mom!" and do the opposite, unless we're talking about corn fritter recipes or those nuggets of wisdom passed on from Poor Richard.
I don't know what we would have done without our experience. We drew on my teenhood as a guide for what not to do and on my husbands for a better example.
We were seldome consistant, always anguishing over our decisions, often at odds with eachother. But we never completely fell for the idea that we're absolutely sure she'd die if we don't do something. At ever step, we tried to weigh our options as best we could and always leave the door open. In the end, we apparently offered the best alternative.
Your milage may vary. I'm not about to tell you what might have happened if you hadn't landed up in Straight cause it's moot. Neither one of us can possibly know. But most of the kids I saw show up on front row were certainly not on the brink of death.
Where I think a huge problem lies for this is that profit seems to be involved in any type of help programs regardless of type of treatment.
Once profit is in the equation....it tends to look at the clients as products of profit rather then what the primary purpose should be. This is very sad to me but, reality. What are your thoughts on this?"
No, I don't think it's the profit. I think it's the coercion. If we didn't have a vast array of laws and regulations to provide artificial incentives, most people simply would not seek treatment for recreational drug use or the typical asshole years of adolescence. Without all that NIDA, LEAA, PDFA and other public (ergo stolen) funding, these programs would never have found a market.
I think Straight, Inc. is the epitome of Socialist Fascism. Hence the favorite tag line of mine "A vote for Büsh is a vote for America's Führor!"
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