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Author Topic: I put myself there.  (Read 3029 times)

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Offline Aaron3

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I put myself there.
« on: November 13, 2003, 04:53:00 PM »
I was one of the real serious drug addicts and drunks that went there.  I was 20 when I signed up and was close to being dead from crack cocaine.  I hated the place but was so scared I was going to die, I stayed and tried to do what I was supposed to do.  The place kept me off the streets long enough to get the shit out of my system and taught me how to tell the truth as I knew it.  That is what saved my ass.  I can't imagine how shitty it must have been to have been under age in there.  I would have lost it had I been in there earlier in life than when I was there.  Don't think for a second that I support the bullshit that straight sold.  My parents did not buy their shit and let me come home for a while after I withdrew in 1990 after being there for 19 mos.  If you really want to know what it was like for me just ask. LOL

[ This Message was edited by: Aaron3 on 2003-11-17 13:04 ]
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ever do I practice the principle of \"I\'l show you, I\'ll hurt me.\"  My life is far to important to me lo let someone with a crappy agenda fuck it up!

Offline Aaron3

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I put myself there.
« Reply #1 on: November 17, 2003, 12:12:00 PM »
i got tired of seeing a big zero next to the number of replies to my message so I am replying to myself.  I am definitely the man!
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ever do I practice the principle of \"I\'l show you, I\'ll hurt me.\"  My life is far to important to me lo let someone with a crappy agenda fuck it up!

Offline Anonymous

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I put myself there.
« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2003, 12:45:00 PM »
:wave: I wasn't in springfield but wanted you to know I care
Sammie Sarasota survivor
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Offline ClayL

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I put myself there.
« Reply #3 on: November 17, 2003, 03:20:00 PM »
Aaron:

I didn't reply because I thought you'd get inundated with flame mail for even uttering that you still thought that place saved your life. I do not agree and not being in Springfield just didn't reply. I look at it differently. The time I spent in straight, plus the years I spent in therapy because of straight I consider wasted time. If straight had been honest and really looked for the things that were wrong with me I could have enjoyed that latter part of my youth. Instead I was locked up in a place, starved, deprived of sleep, basic human rights and completely ignored for 30 months. I was treated to a one size fits all solution that laid all the problems my family experienced at my feet.

It has taken a very long time to gain the respect of my family and to put together a constructive self image. Further, being misdiagnosed, I spent a couple of decades laboring under the assumption that I was indeed a dope fiend. See, this is one of the things that really chaps my ass about that place. They glibly handed out this far reaching diagnosis without any concern at all about the long term consequences. I suspect there are thousands if not tens of thousands of young adults who have trashed their lives down the tubes because of this thoughtless and cruel misdianosis. I can't blame them, straight pounded into their heads, day after day, for years, the young adults in question had only two ways to go in life: Be "straight" or jails, institutions and death. I know it to be BS now, but then? No, nothing would have convinced me it wasn't the gospel.

Thousands of people, permantely impared so that Melvin and Beatty Sembler could realize their political ambitions, it is truly disgusting.

As you can see, my opinion of straight differs vastly from yours. I really don't try to disuade people from their opinions so long as I can express my own. I am glad you posted and wish you the best in finding your old friends.

CL

PS Please don't take this as harsh. I know I come across that way but rarely mean it. I re-read my posts sometimes and get embarrassed at how what I say comes across and my wife really bitches about this. -CL
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Offline Somejoker

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I put myself there.
« Reply #4 on: November 17, 2003, 07:53:00 PM »
aaron, what I here is that you were a troubled 20 year old, signed yourself into straight, disagreed with the modality and methodology, but also used the time to dry out and turned your life around.

Sound entirely rational to me, and welcome to fornits.
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Offline Antigen

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I put myself there.
« Reply #5 on: November 17, 2003, 10:15:00 PM »
I'm sorry Aaron.

What Sammie said.

Usually, a lot of Springfield ppl drop in here. So I figured that would happen. But there's been a great big old brawl going on in another forum, and I guess no one noticed you standing over here.

Welcome. Glad you're OK. Glad your parents figured it out and glad you found the forums. I'm sure, once everyone's picked themselves up and dusted themselves off, things will get back to normal around here.

The fact is the fact, the program is evil, and every attempt to make
chicken salad out of chicken shit has resulted in a Chicken shit
sandwich, No pickle on the side could ever change that.

http://fornits.com/anonanon/video/bingo.ram' target='_new'>BINGO!

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"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
~ Crosby Stills Nash & Young, Sweet Judy Blue Eyes

Offline ehm

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I put myself there.
« Reply #6 on: November 18, 2003, 04:19:00 PM »
Quote
On 2003-11-17 16:53:00, Somejoker wrote:

"aaron, what I here is that you were a troubled 20 year old, signed yourself into straight, disagreed with the modality and methodology, but also used the time to dry out and turned your life around.



Sound entirely rational to me, and welcome to fornits.



"


I agree. Welcome. :smile:

If a nation expects to be ignorant and free, in a state of civilization, it expects what never was and never will be.

--Thomas Jefferson

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Offline Aaron3

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I put myself there.
« Reply #7 on: November 18, 2003, 04:43:00 PM »
Clay,

Don't sweat it!  I don't mind a direct opinion as long as it isn't directed towards my mother or my children!!

A
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ever do I practice the principle of \"I\'l show you, I\'ll hurt me.\"  My life is far to important to me lo let someone with a crappy agenda fuck it up!

Offline Anonymous

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I put myself there.
« Reply #8 on: November 19, 2003, 09:37:00 PM »
Hey man,
I am just glad that I got to meet you in Straight and become friends in and out of there. You saved my ass a few times in the real world and for that I am forever grateful. Amazing how much a person thinks they know in Straight and then when they are out how much they realize they don't know about recovery or reality or hell, anything. You and I had no idea with how to do anything but be irresponsible with just about everything!!! As I have some regrets about Straight and I certainly now do not agree with a lot of shit that took place there and feel sorry for the people that had other problems other then actual drug/booze problems (and I believe now that there could have been alot of them)but, for me the amount of drugs and drinking and fights , suicide attempts and so on, I truely doubt that I would have survived another 6 months before I got there. Straight also taught me how to be honest as well as play head games with myself until I thought I was insane. It did buy me some time in life though. although I hated most of it. I found some important people in there though that apparently needed to be in my life (later, after Straight) and it showed me at least the direction to AA. I don't have any huge bitterness towards the place....I do have some though about specific situations. I will say this though, I certainly would not ever want to relive my stay at the resort that some call Straight Inc.
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Offline LT

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I put myself there.
« Reply #9 on: July 23, 2005, 08:25:00 PM »
HI.  You're no zero.  That's what I got too. We were in at the same time.  Trying to figure out who you are.
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Offline shady grove

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I put myself there.
« Reply #10 on: July 25, 2005, 06:24:00 PM »
Thanks for posting Aaron

I, too, really feel like I had a drug problem and the diagnosis was accidentally correct. I really needed some kind of intervention, just not that kind of one. I just melted in there and learned really well how to abuse myself. Alot of the pain I have from that experience I didn't realize was even there until I got on this site and read other people's stories.

I am glad straight told me about NA/AA and that's about it. The rest had nothing to do with the steps...a poor, ineffective copy.

I still attend meetings and still consider myself an addict. You will find saying that can be pretty unpopular around here, but fuck it.

I still try to overcome pain everyday that straight instilled in me. I am not grateful for my time in there, but would I have it any other way...a ridiculous thing to ponder IMHO.

Welcome :wave:
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