12 fun things to do at forcibly attended AA meetings

[Anne Bonney]

Lighten-up.

Fuck off.

[Anonymous]

:jamin:

[Anonymous]

:hug:

[Whooter]

Ha,Ha,Ha ....  good thread.

[RTP2003]

A Vision for You

...Two days later, a future daily user of cannabis stared glassily at the strangers beside his bed. "Who are you fellows, and why this private room? I was always in a ward before."

They grinned, which he didn't like so much. Said one of the visitors, "We're giving you a treatment for the damage you received in AA."

Hopelessness was written large on the man's face as he replied, "Oh, but that's no use. Nothing would fix me. I'm a goner. The last three times, I went and called my sponsor, then hit a Step Study meeting  on the way home from here. I'm afraid to go out the door. I can't understand it."

Asked one of the visitors, "Can you move your right hand?"

With a puzzled look on his face, the man tried it, and discovered that he could.

Asked one of the visitors, as he offered a glass pipe to the man, "Can you pick this up with your right hand, and put it to your mouth?"

The man tried it. "Why, yes, I can," said the man.

"Can you inhale the smoke?" asked the other visitor, "and hold it deeply in your lungs?"

One of the visitors filled the pipe with marijuana, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your right hand to lift this pipe to your mouth, and smoke all of this?"

The man discovered that he could.

One of the visitors filled the pipe with cannabis again, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your left hand to lift this pipe to your mouth, and smoke all of this?"

The man discovered that he could do that, too.

Said one of the visitors, "That explains it. That is what is happening to you on the way home from here. You are wandering into Stepcult meetings when you should be smoking more WEED".  

Said the man, "This is amazing. No one has ever been able to explain it to me so clearly before. I want to join your church right now."

The visitors thought they noticed something different about him already. He had begun to have a spiritual experience.

"We represent the Red Temple Cult" said the visitors.  We've got to get back to our UFO, but if you send money and drugs  to RTP2003, he will give you further instructions.  Remember, stay away from 12 Step meetings.  Be cool.  Later."

[Anne Bonney]

A Vision for You

...Two days later, a future daily user of cannabis stared glassily at the strangers beside his bed. "Who are you fellows, and why this private room? I was always in a ward before."

They grinned, which he didn't like so much. Said one of the visitors, "We're giving you a treatment for the damage you received in AA."

Hopelessness was written large on the man's face as he replied, "Oh, but that's no use. Nothing would fix me. I'm a goner. The last three times, I went and called my sponsor, then hit a Step Study meeting  on the way home from here. I'm afraid to go out the door. I can't understand it."

Asked one of the visitors, "Can you move your right hand?"

With a puzzled look on his face, the man tried it, and discovered that he could.

Asked one of the visitors, as he offered a glass pipe to the man, "Can you pick this up with your right hand, and put it to your mouth?"

The man tried it. "Why, yes, I can," said the man.

"Can you inhale the smoke?" asked the other visitor, "and hold it deeply in your lungs?"

One of the visitors filled the pipe with marijuana, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your right hand to lift this pipe to your mouth, and smoke all of this?"

The man discovered that he could.

One of the visitors filled the pipe with cannabis again, and handed it to the man, and asked, "Can you use your left hand to lift this pipe to your mouth, and smoke all of this?"

The man discovered that he could do that, too.

Said one of the visitors, "That explains it. That is what is happening to you on the way home from here. You are wandering into Stepcult meetings when you should be smoking more WEED".  

Said the man, "This is amazing. No one has ever been able to explain it to me so clearly before. I want to join your church right now."

The visitors thought they noticed something different about him already. He had begun to have a spiritual experience.

"We represent the Red Temple Cult" said the visitors.  We've got to get back to our UFO, but if you send money and drugs  to RTP2003, he will give you further instructions.  Remember, stay away from 12 Step meetings.  Be cool.  Later."

 :notworthy:  :notworthy:  :rasta:

[Anonymous]

:flame:

[Anonymous]

Lighten-up.

Fuck off.

:shamrock:  
Nice......
Danny

[Anonymous]

New Treatment Breakthrough

Many city, state, and Federal government agencies have been frustrated by the very poor results obtained from existing drug and alcohol treatment programs, in spite of the large amounts of money spent trying to solve these social problems.

But the Bureau of Abstract Statistics reports a major discovery, finding that when survey questionnaires about continued drug and alcohol use are handed out and collected by parole officers, judges, or other officers of the court, the success rate of the drug and alcohol treatment programs suddenly jumps to 100%. Nobody reports any problems with relapses or continued use at all.

The Bureau suggests that this effect can be used as an "after-burner" to enhance the success rate of existing treatment programs. Sam Wannabe, a senior statistician with the Bureau, says, "It is obvious that we can save the taxpayers millions of dollars, just by using parole officers and judges to calculate the success rates of treatment programs. This is truly a great day in the war on drugs."

 :shamrock:  :shamrock:
 This is very funny.....lol
Danny

[Anonymous]

New Treatment Breakthrough

Many city, state, and Federal government agencies have been frustrated by the very poor results obtained from existing drug and alcohol treatment programs, in spite of the large amounts of money spent trying to solve these social problems.

But the Bureau of Abstract Statistics reports a major discovery, finding that when survey questionnaires about continued drug and alcohol use are handed out and collected by parole officers, judges, or other officers of the court, the success rate of the drug and alcohol treatment programs suddenly jumps to 100%. Nobody reports any problems with relapses or continued use at all.

The Bureau suggests that this effect can be used as an "after-burner" to enhance the success rate of existing treatment programs. Sam Wannabe, a senior statistician with the Bureau, says, "It is obvious that we can save the taxpayers millions of dollars, just by using parole officers and judges to calculate the success rates of treatment programs. This is truly a great day in the war on drugs."

 :shamrock:  :shamrock:
 This is very funny.....lol
Danny

[Anonymous]

New Treatment Breakthrough

Many city, state, and Federal government agencies have been frustrated by the very poor results obtained from existing drug and alcohol treatment programs, in spite of the large amounts of money spent trying to solve these social problems.

But the Bureau of Abstract Statistics reports a major discovery, finding that when survey questionnaires about continued drug and alcohol use are handed out and collected by parole officers, judges, or other officers of the court, the success rate of the drug and alcohol treatment programs suddenly jumps to 100%. Nobody reports any problems with relapses or continued use at all.

The Bureau suggests that this effect can be used as an "after-burner" to enhance the success rate of existing treatment programs. Sam Wannabe, a senior statistician with the Bureau, says, "It is obvious that we can save the taxpayers millions of dollars, just by using parole officers and judges to calculate the success rates of treatment programs. This is truly a great day in the war on drugs."

 :shamrock:  :shamrock:
 This is very funny.....lol
Danny

[Banny Dennison]

Hey Danny, I was never involved with AA, but I WAS involved with your mother last weekend, and she did not impress me either.  And now it burns when I pee, too.  Say, and when's she gonna pay me the money that she owes me?

[Octomommy]

Danny can not talk right now, he is sucking my dick.
When he is done, he will be back to Troll.
 :feedtrolls:

[Anne Bonney]

Hey Danny, I was never involved with AA, but I WAS involved with your mother last weekend, and she did not impress me either.  And now it burns when I pee, too.  Say, and when's she gonna pay me the money that she owes me?

This is very funny.....lol
 :shamrock:

[Anonymous]

Hey Danny, I was never involved with AA, but I WAS involved with your mother last weekend, and she did not impress me either.  And now it burns when I pee, too.  Say, and when's she gonna pay me the money that she owes me?

This is very funny.....lol
 :shamrock:

Anne,
This will actually be my last response to you because like me for awhile, you have entered into the bizarre.
So bye bye...
Danny