Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Benchmark Young Adult School / Benchmark Transitions

Adult Children Living At Home

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psy:

--- Quote ---Coping With Adult Children Living At Home

We understand the challenges you face with an adult child living at home. The students who require the assistance of our school usually do not want to be here. Many are late stage adolescents, or adult children living at home with parents rather contently. They have been skipping school, partying with friends, taking liberties with family members and indulging in other disruptive behaviors*. Others have been living at home with parents quietly, but doing nothing with their adult lives. Now they must leave their homes, family and friends and take the challenging steps necessary to move forward in their adult lives. To learn more about any aspect of our program, please contact us today.
--- End quote ---


source - http://www.benchmarkyoungadultschool.co ... ofile.html

Un B lievable.  They basically promise to take your recent (if even) graduate from HS and make him a "model citizen"... even if they're doing NOTHING wrong... What the fuck happened to "you're going to have to get a job or go to school, or we aren't going to pay for you...".

* notice they remind the parents immediately of how annoying their little hellspawn are (nice marketing tactic).  Misses the point entirely that everybody is an asshole sometimes and every parent feels wronged by their kids (and it does happen, but it does go both ways).  In my opinion, conflict in a family situation is inevitable and natural... especially when parents want to be obeyed, are used to it, and become angry when their kids turn out a little differently than they expected (natural).  Heaven forbid they make their own choices and learn their own consequences on their own.

Now if you think that little snippet is bad... guess what happens to the chosen few selected to graduate and become free advertising (until they kill themselves):

http://www.benchmarkyoungadultschool.co ... story.html


--- Quote ---Success Story
Meet Meghan

One year ago this past September, Meghan arrived at Benchmark. “The first thing I did when I got here was to lie straight to Jaynie and Richard, by telling them that I absolutely did NOT have an addiction. I was scared to be here. I had no self esteem, no coping mechanisms and major anger issues,â€
--- End quote ---

Ursus:
The self-congratulations drip through every sentence.  Pity the poor sacrificial lamb.

This generally goes two ways:  she makes a career for herself at Benchmark, or, once out of the limelight, commences with a major slide in the other direction.  People singled out for star-status like that are rarely able to quietly and gradually wake up on their own.  Sometimes they never do.

psy:

--- Quote from: ""Ursus"" ---The self-congratulations drip through every sentence.  Pity the poor sacrificial lamb.

This generally goes two ways:  she makes a career for herself at Benchmark
--- End quote ---
Already done...


--- Quote ---Meghan Frawley
Weekend Resident Counselor

Meghan came to Benchmark Young Adult School in September, 2005 as a student. She admits to having no self-esteem, no coping mechanisms, anger issues and an addiction to alcohol and drugs. Meghan spent 18 months as a student at Benchmark. In that time, she rebuilt her self-confidence, re-establisher relationships with family and friends and took control over her life. She served as Benchmark’s Student Government President and was honored as Student of the Year for 2006. She has achieved almost two years living clean and sober. She worked as a Benchmark Resident Advisor when she was in the graduate program and is now a Weekend Resident Counselor. Her duties include assisting the students with their weekend independent living skills such as meal planning, shopping and household chores. She provides emotional and behavioral support and helps students with problem solving issues in addition to participation in activities such as bowling, roller skating, BBQ picnics, sporting games and charity runs. Meghan is studying to become a California State Certified Drug and Alcohol Counselor. She has completed her first year of classes in counseling, crisis intervention and also in public speaking. Meghan enjoys spending time with her friends and going to Starbucks.
--- End quote ---

Source... http://www.benchmarkyoungadultschool.co ... story.html


--- Quote ---or, once out of the limelight, commences with a major slide in the other direction.
--- End quote ---
Or both.  Staff quit/relapse/fired rate is crazy...

--- Quote ---People singled out for star-status like that
--- End quote ---
See.  A lot of people don't realize that (they aren't cynical enough).  Some "students" were chosen for a fast track path.  I've been able to verify this happened from an ex staff member who was at another school.  It's not an illusory phenomenon.  Staff did pick some to be "success stories".  But it's just enough for marketing... As few as possible get picked, while the vast majority of students are kept chasing a carrot on the stick (that they'll get, and get taken away, until they figure out what's going on, start "spreading negativity" (or start a strike like I did), and get sent to one of the splendidly luxurious $60/week motels in Redlands CA...  And at night, instead of watching COPS on the TV, you can see it out your motel window.

Get a job?  Forget it.  No phone in the motel, also, if you got a job without Benchmark you were out (immediately) and if you got it with benchmark you had to sign over your paychecks... Go ahead...  Ask me a question.  They have every angle covered so you would stay in the program for as long as the parents have cash...  and when they runout, they tell your parents you blew your chances somehow and drop you on the street with no money, property, food, water, or in my case (but not always), identification.  AND  They'll convince your parents not to talk to you while you're in motel so you can't tell your parent what is going on. (recommendation of the psychologist after you "blow up", your parents refuse to take you out, conflict takes place, the program plays on that conflict (such as in suggesting you confront your parents about something, for example), and harsh words get thrown.

What if they called the cops?  Benchmark tells the students they have no rights (that they signed them away when they entered program).  Plus.  The owner (Jayne Longnecker) has local police in the family.  How did ambulance records disappear?  You ask me...  but that would require an insider on the police to accomplish.  Survivors (who attempted suicide or were otherwise 5150ed) have ambulance bills, and for some really strange reason, they don't line up with the Redlands PD records.

Somebody once suggested to me that it sounds like fraud inside the ambulance company, but there was also complicity by the police because they would come as well for suicide attempts (and would help out with a restraint (tazers, if necessary)).

--- Quote ---are rarely able to quietly and gradually wake up on their own.  Sometimes they never do.
--- End quote ---
Some never do becuase their entire lives are built around that belief system, supporting it...  In other words, if that belief system (the program works, because I'm alive because of it) is threatened their entire lives would collapse...

Hey.  Wake up you fuckin program people.  This asshole who you hate is alive and kicking and, all things considering, actually doing pretty well.  My criminal record is spotless, grades are good... Definitely not dead...  Insane?  Eccentric perhaps, but in this conformist society, that's a very good thing IMO.

Anonymous:
"coping" with adult children liveing "quietly" at home.  How sick that this is viewed as a negative!  
We live in a world where we have lost or in some cases, thrown away, the most vital of all reasons for being: connection.  Connection to people we love and who love us back.  Home is where you are supposed to be comfortable.   My daughters have lived with me as adults for extended periods of time and I loved every minute; I would have them with me all the time if I could only I went and bought them a house (like what young people are ever going to be able to afford one these days?...besides I get to see them enjoy their inheritance, which I worked hard for, while I'm alive instead of imagining how it will be after I croak)  My step-son lives with us.  He is 28,  is finishing up school where he has always been on the slow track and works with his father and me in a (money-making) musical group.  He has a very unique bond with his dad.  We don't have any " my house, my rules" stuff going on.  It is "our" house and we all do what we can to make living together cozy.  He has total freedom the result of which is that he is very respectful and considerate.  No one is pressuring him to be or do anything on  anyone's timetable but his.

People should stop with their stupid bowing to society's view of how things should be and do what really works for everyone in their family.  My daughter said it best when she was four:  " I'm the boss of my own self!"  If more parents had confidence in their parenting, the balls to tell society to kiss off and love their children unconditionally, being on their side right or wrong understanding that each minute with their precious children is a gift in a world that is random, violent and not very kind then these hellholes would not have a market.

Nihilanthic:
Don't you know yet, silly, that people make up new problems and issues and controversies to make money and because its easier to fix a fake one than a real one?  :rofl:  :rofl:

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