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Offline Anne Bonney

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Open Meeting
« on: September 14, 2007, 09:08:52 PM »
I'm gonna vape this one in honor of all those stuck in an Open Meeting right now.

:smokin:

I hope they don't still do "Reviews".

 :(
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline hanzomon4

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« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2007, 09:14:40 PM »
What are open meetings like? Is it the same as "talk"?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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i]Do something real, however, small. And don\'t-- don\'t diss the political things, but understand their limitations - Grace Lee Boggs[/i]
I do see the present and the future of our children as very dark. But I trust the people\'s capacity for reflection, rage, and rebellion - Oscar Olivera

Howto]

Offline Anne Bonney

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« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2007, 09:28:11 PM »
No, but you get your "talk" right after OM.  Open meeting is the required twice weekly (at Straight, I think they've gone down to one now though, Fridays), Monday and Friday.

Kids on one side of the room, parents on the other.  Newcomers under 14 days must give an "introduction".  This means that they stand in front of the kids and parents and first you tell the 'drugs you've done'.  By the end of the two weeks kids are copping to anything and everything b/c when they tell the truth, they're called liars and are told 'there's more you're not telling us'.  Then you give a sob story (the more humiliating the more points you score with staff) about your past and how terrible you feel about it.  Then you talk about how you now realize, through the gracious help of Straight :roll:, that you're a druggie and you're oh so thrilled to be here.  Then you promise to 'work the program' and 'get honest'.  The whole group, kids and parents, scream "Love Ya Anne" in unison and you sit down and pass the mic to the next poor soul.

After the kids have gone, its the parents turn but their job is to tell everyone what a little shit you are, how you scared them with all your weird clothes and moodiness and strange smells coming from your room.  They tell you they're "committed to the program" (they're told to say this by Newton) and you're not welcome home unless you commit to.  Then they pass the mic to the next robot parents to have them do the same thing.

After OM, if you've been a good little Straiggtling, you get the 'privilege' of a 5 minute talk with your parents.  Monitored by an oldcomer.  And you're not allowed to talk about anything that happens inside the program.  All you're allowed to say is I'm sorry adn I love you.

Then the fun of Open Meeting Review comes.  Ya gotta give me a minute to recover though.  This really creeps me out that kids are sitting through this shit RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

  :flame:  :flame:  :flame:  :flame:  :flame:
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline hanzomon4

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« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2007, 09:32:35 PM »
I'm sorry, take all the time you need.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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i]Do something real, however, small. And don\'t-- don\'t diss the political things, but understand their limitations - Grace Lee Boggs[/i]
I do see the present and the future of our children as very dark. But I trust the people\'s capacity for reflection, rage, and rebellion - Oscar Olivera

Howto]

Offline Anne Bonney

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« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2007, 09:38:13 PM »
Quote from: ""hanzomon4""
I'm sorry, take all the time you need.


Not at all.  It's not you.  Talking and thinking about this just kinda put me in high gear.  I just need to chill for a bit.  Sometimes I'm really OK, then something will hit me out of the blue and I find myself sitting here either reading or writing with tears streaming down my face.  Then I'm laughing like an idiot at something one of you guys have posted.

Shit, talk about teens having mood swings.

 :roll:  ::bwahaha::
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline webdiva

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« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2007, 09:49:30 PM »
Quote from: ""hanzomon4""
What are open meetings like? Is it the same as "talk"?


OMG no lol talk was a privilege open meetings were hell. course so were talks actually...

oh i will never ever ever ever forget steve's first talk. the one 82 days after he was put in the program... the one where my mom and dad were both there (the only one my dad was gone soon after).

the one where i felt like crying as he walked up to us and i got to hug him...

the one where before he even sat down he looked at me and said in front of my parents "kelly, i'm sorry for touching you in an appropriate way when i was younger..."

*silence came over the room* all i saw was my mom and dad and their faces.  "DID YOU HAVE SEX?!?!!"  my 13 year old brain could not compute, i did not know what was happening. everything was in sloooooooooooowwwwwwww motion......

i answered "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" lol and of course we didn't. my brother was referring to some inappropriate stuff that happened but it was years back, he was a child as well and i had no idea why we were talking about it. if there ever was one that would have been a kodak moment at straight... i truly couldn't believe that happened... then he sat down and we had our first "talk".

of course years later... now that i know the truth, it kills me that they used that against him to make him feel like some child abuser. and i know they did. and that sucks especially if they took it to a point where he began to believe it and look at himself that way. truly heart breaking. those mother fuckers!  ok sorry anyway just thought i'd "share"   :flame:
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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RIP Steve Matthews and all those we have lost along the way!

Offline Anne Bonney

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« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2007, 09:55:47 PM »
Quote from: ""webdiva""
Quote from: ""hanzomon4""
What are open meetings like? Is it the same as "talk"?

OMG no lol talk was a privilege open meetings were hell. course so were talks actually...

oh i will never ever ever ever forget steve's first talk. the one 82 days after he was put in the program... the one where my mom and dad were both there (the only one my dad was gone soon after).

the one where i felt like crying as he walked up to us and i got to hug him...

the one where before he even sat down he looked at me and said in front of my parents "kelly, i'm sorry for touching you in an appropriate way when i was younger..."

*silence came over the room* all i saw was my mom and dad and their faces.  "DID YOU HAVE SEX?!?!!"  my 13 year old brain could not compute, i did not know what was happening. everything was in sloooooooooooowwwwwwww motion......

i answered "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" lol and of course we didn't. my brother was referring to some inappropriate stuff that happened but it was years back, he was a child as well and i had no idea why we were talking about it. if there ever was one that would have been a kodak moment at straight... i truly couldn't believe that happened... then he sat down and we had our first "talk".

of course years later... now that i know the truth, it kills me that they used that against him to make him feel like some child abuser. and i know they did. and that sucks especially if they took it to a point where he began to believe it and look at himself that way. truly heart breaking. those mother fuckers!  ok sorry anyway just thought i'd "share"   :flame:



I know!  That's one of the most damaging aspects of it.  They just shame you into the ground.  For anything and everything.  Shit that makes no fucking sense whatsoever.  Ruth Ann Newton told me that I needed to look at where I was responsible when I told my parents about some real sexual abuse that happened to me when from the ages of 7 - 11.  It was extremely traumatic.  She was actually trying to make ME responsible for an adult assaulting me.  What kind of a person does that?  And what does that do to someone's soul?

It makes me so sad. Especially hearing about kids like Steve for whom it ended up being just too much to take.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline webdiva

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« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2007, 10:11:53 PM »
Quote from: ""Anne Bonney""
 Ruth Ann Newton told me that I needed to look at where I was responsible when I told my parents about some real sexual abuse that happened to me when from the ages of 7 - 11.  It was extremely traumatic.  She was actually trying to make ME responsible for an adult assaulting me.  What kind of a person does that?  And what does that do to someone's soul?


oh thanks for making me cry~! LOL that's such bullshit, not you making me cry but anyone thinking a child is to blame.. but of course a child abuser would say that and probably think that. stupid fuckers. sorry to hear that, that realy sucks i mean that can obviously have a lasting effect on a person even if they know later its total bullshit. damn! *hugs* LOL im a mess tonight.    :rofl:  :rofl:
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RIP Steve Matthews and all those we have lost along the way!

Offline Anne Bonney

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« Reply #8 on: September 14, 2007, 10:16:43 PM »
Quote from: ""webdiva""
Quote from: ""Anne Bonney""
 Ruth Ann Newton told me that I needed to look at where I was responsible when I told my parents about some real sexual abuse that happened to me when from the ages of 7 - 11.  It was extremely traumatic.  She was actually trying to make ME responsible for an adult assaulting me.  What kind of a person does that?  And what does that do to someone's soul?

oh thanks for making me cry~! LOL that's such bullshit, not you making me cry but anyone thinking a child is to blame.. but of course a child abuser would say that and probably think that. stupid fuckers. sorry to hear that, that realy sucks i mean that can obviously have a lasting effect on a person even if they know later its total bullshit. damn! *hugs* LOL im a mess tonight.    :rofl:  :rofl:



You and me both darlin'!!  You and me both.  :rofl:   I just told someone that I'm all over the place.  None of it awful, just strange.

Football season started last week so hubby is gone every weekend covering them, so I'm missing him.  My daughter and I are sitting here talking.  She's reading Help At Any Cost right now, so we're both a li'l screwy.

Think I'll grab another beer.

 ::bwahaha::  ::cheers::





and thanks for the thoughts.
 :D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline webdiva

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« Reply #9 on: September 14, 2007, 10:29:59 PM »
Quote from: ""Anne Bonney""

Think I'll grab another beer.

 ::bwahaha::  ::cheers::





and thanks for the thoughts.
 :D


anytime. and fuck it i think ill grab another drink myself, why not at this point LOL :D
« Last Edit: September 14, 2007, 11:19:11 PM by Guest »
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RIP Steve Matthews and all those we have lost along the way!

Offline hanzomon4

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« Reply #10 on: September 14, 2007, 10:56:14 PM »
My God, I'll never get that with these people. Blaming a child for being sexually abused, I could fucking kill hearing that. Same with your brother webdiva, being made to believe you sexually abused a child and worse your sister is something that would destroy a person inside. I can't imagine what it was like for him  ::noway::  

It's not just this, but I've been hearing some very detailed a painful stuff lately and it makes me so upset. I could literally reach through the computer and strangle the assholes responsible :evil:  :evil:

Pass the beer, I got some great Italian import stuff... Peroni Nastro Azzurro
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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i]Do something real, however, small. And don\'t-- don\'t diss the political things, but understand their limitations - Grace Lee Boggs[/i]
I do see the present and the future of our children as very dark. But I trust the people\'s capacity for reflection, rage, and rebellion - Oscar Olivera

Howto]

Offline webdiva

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« Reply #11 on: September 14, 2007, 11:18:25 PM »
Quote from: ""hanzomon4""
My God, I'll never get that with these people. Blaming a child for being sexually abused, I could fucking kill hearing that. Same with your brother webdiva, being made to believe you sexually abused a child and worse your sister is something that would destroy a person inside. I can't imagine what it was like for him  ::noway::  


yep this is one reason i actually blame straight for his suicide. not partially but 100%  no one can tell me differently any more. i used to question myself if i could fully BLAME someone else for causing someone to kill themselves. but considering what i know now and what they chose to use against him as a form of "Therapy" or reform seals the deal for me.  They destroyed him and to a point where he really believed he didn't deserve to live. god that just blows my mind that anyone would value someone else's life so little that they would allow a child to beleive that they are worthless. that's just so wrong, i can't even find the words to say how that it really makes me feel.  :-?
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Offline Anne Bonney

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« Reply #12 on: September 14, 2007, 11:34:13 PM »
Its one of the parts that's so hard for people who haven't been through it to understand.  I mean, its just so devastating.  They lay you bare.  I was trying to explain this the other night to my friend.  While explaining the introduction to her, I just fell apart.  I remembered how utterly naked and alone I felt.  Stripped to the bone in front of several hundred people.  I had to stop.

Does anyone want to even attempt to get into OMR?  A quick description is that of the above, but then the 'hounds' are turned loose.  Anything your parents have told 'staff' about you, anything that you've told anyone, all your fears and insecurities completely used to rip you to shreds.




I need to go smoke a cigarette, walk the dogs and calm down.  This is the stuff nightmares are made of.

 :scared:  ::mecry::  ::mecry::
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
AA is a cult http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-cult.html

The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline webdiva

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« Reply #13 on: September 15, 2007, 12:24:27 AM »
Quote from: ""Anne Bonney""


I need to go smoke a cigarette, walk the dogs and calm down.  This is the stuff nightmares are made of.

 :scared:  ::mecry::  ::mecry::


*hugs*
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Offline Rachael

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« Reply #14 on: September 15, 2007, 12:49:57 AM »
The equivalent at AARC was also called review I think. I can't exactly remember. But it was on this stool in front of the whole group. Completely singled out. Torn apart. This was when most people got their step one. I don't know how to talk about it, how to explain it.

It hurt more than anything - except maybe when vause would bring my sisters up in front of me and make me confess all the things I'd done to make them hurt. That killed me. They would cry and I.....

Fuck I can't even wrote this shit out. It hurts too fucking much. And it doesn't help that in my head I can see the group just sitting there in open meeting - at this very moment.

Sometimes it's like no time has passed at all. Something puts me back there and I am just as small.



Ugh.... that's it for me tonight folks.
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Justice, Justice shall you pursue.

Deuteronomy 16:20
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