When I first came to Fornits, this was my main beef, the lack of help, there simply isn't anyhting out there, no-one cares, no-one wants to know, they just want to shove your problem (your kid) from one department to anohter
The fight I've had over the years to demand help, I've paid too many taxes over the years to not get it, only to hit a brick wall every time
When I finally managed to get soem help, I felt like a weight was lifted, it wasn't anyone taking responsibility from me, I just felt a new release of energy and was able to cope with doing this alone, because the support was lingering in the background when I needed it, something I've never experienced in my life
BIG MISTAKE!!
I just can't believe that there are
that many kids out there for whom the only solution is outside the home. Truly mentally ill kids, maybe but rebellious, crazy, disrespectful, danger-seeking, defiant teenagers? No! If you have a truly mentally ill child, get them medical help.
I'm feeling very torn here. I wouldn't want to presume to tell anyone that their child didn't need 'help', but it just seems like the form of help they're always looking for entails the kids being out of the home. Now, there's a mom who lost her son to a program. She says he was so dangerous that she would have been charged with abuse/neglect of her
other child if she did not remove her son from the home. So, I can see where she felt forced into the situation and believed the nice people who told her they'd help her. Then you've got a couple of AA nuts who are convinced there daughter has a
100 % chance of becoming an alcoholic because they both are. She's only drank a couple of times. Their basic complaint is that she's disrespectful. She's already been through Catherine Freer and now mommie dearest is shopping for another happy place for her to go. :roll:
Nothing is going to change until parents really begin to take responsibility for their children and their own parenting skills.
The second things started to turn around, due to the fact that i was coping so much better, the quicker the supports gets withdrawn - lol - I feel like I'm back to square one now, things have changed round here for sure, there's no questioning that, but me, personally, I feel alone again and unable to cope
Why? What's happened?
You're all missing the key point, the support does need to be there, it does, it's crap - but it needs to stay in place until everyone is fully in control of what they are doing and have full understanding of what the family as a unit needs
I believe you that it's all crap, but the solution is not outside the home. If you're going to try and reform, regulate or otherwise alter this industry, why not concentrate on the fact that it is the EXTREMELY RARE kid, EXCEEDINGLY RARE kid who needs to be removed and work on programs that keep the kid home. There are already decent ones, from what I'm hearing, like FFT (?). Deb, help me out here.
I was slammed, abused, got every bit of shit you lot could find to throw at me when I came here with my story, but I ploughed on because I had to have that understanding for the sake of my family - just like abusive programs, it's taken the death of a child to listen to what is actually needed - no-one ever fucking listens
Now I feel better, thankyou, rant over :roll:
Yes, you got slammed, but you
did stick with it and found useful information, no? You gained the respect of quite a few people here too
because it was important enough to you, as it should be to every parent either considering these places or are already using them. I understand that it's shocking for parents when they're spoken to some of the ways they are here, but christ people; what the
hell[/i] do you think these kids went through trapped in taht kind of a world. Sometimes for months or years on end. Yeah, Fornits is rough. Yes, it's full of rage. Yes, there's a lot of shit that crosses normal lines, but we're not dealing with normal people here. We're damaged goods, haven't you heard? :rofl:
