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Author Topic: Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.  (Read 2935 times)

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Offline Nihilanthic

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« on: April 24, 2007, 02:44:18 PM »
I noticed where I work (was just transferred to... I didn't just now notice something that was there c/o Fnords :P) has some bullshit posted up on the walls care of an assistant manager who went to some seminar.

Its "Winners vs Losers"

Shit like....
The Winner says let me do that for you, the loser says its not my job

The Loser always has an excuse, the winner always has a program

The winner is always part of the answer and the loser is always part of the problem

The winner sees an answer to every problem and the loser sees a problem with every answer

ETC...

Um, wtf? It really made me just blink and go "well, damn, this shit has infested the business world" but yesterday another assistant manager liked the fact that I have a critical nature and said its a good thing, especially that I know its not a 4-letter word  :rofl:
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Offline Anonymous

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2007, 07:46:10 PM »
I have my own 'demotivational' calendar at work. Last month's had a picture of some guys running on a track, with the subtitle:

DEFEAT
For Every Winner, There Are Dozens of Losers. Odds Are You're One of Them.

We don't need no stinking 'programs' in the workplace. We just need people to do their jobs and do them well.
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Offline Troll Control

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2007, 07:58:53 PM »
That sucks.  I work for a Japanese company that doesn't rely on American bullshit catch phrases and "motivational" posters that are really just nonsensical crap.

For example, one of the posters near my office has this message:

"Why is the ocean the king of a thousand streams?  Because it lies beneath them."

No mumbo-jumbo BS.  Just straight up philosophy.  Now that's motivating!  Plus the artwork is pretty nice, too.
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Offline Anonymous

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2007, 08:33:00 PM »
Zen phrases would be even better.

What is the sound of one hand clapping?
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Offline Anonymous

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"catch phrases"
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2007, 08:49:53 PM »
I work for a bank, so its pretty straightlaced, but, fortunately, I work in operations so I dont have to see the public every day. So I can get away with sayings taped to my wall such as:

"I can only please one person a day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either."

"Cows may come and cows may go, but the bull in this place goes on forever."

"Did you eat a big bowl of stupid today or what?"

I am known for my sarcasm at work can you tell? haha I consider it my duty to lighten up that stuffy bank atmosphere.
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Offline nimdA

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #5 on: April 24, 2007, 10:40:53 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
That sucks.  I work for a Japanese company that doesn't rely on American bullshit catch phrases and "motivational" posters that are really just nonsensical crap.

For example, one of the posters near my office has this message:

"Why is the ocean the king of a thousand streams?  Because it lies beneath them."

No mumbo-jumbo BS.  Just straight up philosophy.  Now that's motivating!  Plus the artwork is pretty nice, too.


The Japanese used to have special spots where their employees could kick the shit out of life like pictures of their bosses posted to a kicking bag of some sort.

I'm more down for a night at the local strip club for motivation, but then that is me.
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Offline TheWho

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #6 on: April 25, 2007, 12:47:02 AM »
Niles... you take life way too seriously.  The guy selling those signs could care less if they motivate anyone let alone care if anyone even hangs them up, he just wants to make a buck

a couple favorites:

I am neither for nor against apathy.

If voting could really change things it would be illegal.
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Offline Anonymous

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #7 on: April 25, 2007, 12:52:45 AM »
It could be worse, you could be working for a program.
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Offline Ursus

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #8 on: April 25, 2007, 05:43:55 AM »
Quote
Shit like....

The Winner says let me do that for you, the loser says its not my job

The Loser always has an excuse, the winner always has a program

The winner is always part of the answer and the loser is always part of the problem

The winner sees an answer to every problem and the loser sees a problem with every answer

ETC...


Sounds a little like lukewarm LGAT to me... Just what kind of "seminar" did this assistant manager go to?  I have an inherent and most visceral reaction to that kind of bullshit, but maybe that's due to past history.  If anything sounds the least bit like program or LGAT, my buttons are pushed, even if it is supposed to be innocuous and innocent...
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Offline Antigen

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #9 on: April 25, 2007, 06:08:12 PM »
Quote from: ""Ursus""

I have an inherent and most visceral reaction to that kind of bullshit, but maybe that's due to past history.  If anything sounds the least bit like program or LGAT, my buttons are pushed, even if it is supposed to be innocuous and innocent...


Me too. I find it pays to follow that instinct, too.
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Offline Troll Control

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #10 on: April 25, 2007, 06:39:14 PM »
Quote from: ""TheWho""
Niles... you take life way too seriously.  The guy selling those (programs) signs could care less if they motivate anyone let alone care if anyone even hangs them up, he just wants to make a buck.


Niles takes life too seriously?  This is coming from a guy who spends all day and all night every day and every night trying to convince people to sign their kids up at a program!   :o  :D

Give it a rest!
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Offline Anonymous

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #11 on: April 25, 2007, 07:32:42 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
That sucks.  I work for a Japanese company that doesn't rely on American bullshit catch phrases and "motivational" posters that are really just nonsensical crap.

For example, one of the posters near my office has this message:

"Why is the ocean the king of a thousand streams?  Because it lies beneath them."

No mumbo-jumbo BS.  Just straight up philosophy.  Now that's motivating!  Plus the artwork is pretty nice, too.


Is this another "hand that rocks the cradle" women are so powerful just ignore patriarchy and get me a beer platitude????

Dunno about that whole "thousand streams" thing, tho. Sounds excessive.

Or are we saying prostitutes rule the world?

 :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:
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Offline Anonymous

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #12 on: April 25, 2007, 07:43:35 PM »
Quote from: ""Ursus""
Quote
Shit like....

The Winner says let me do that for you, the loser says its not my job

The Loser always has an excuse, the winner always has a program

The winner is always part of the answer and the loser is always part of the problem

The winner sees an answer to every problem and the loser sees a problem with every answer

ETC...

Sounds a little like lukewarm LGAT to me... Just what kind of "seminar" did this assistant manager go to?  I have an inherent and most visceral reaction to that kind of bullshit, but maybe that's due to past history.  If anything sounds the least bit like program or LGAT, my buttons are pushed, even if it is supposed to be innocuous and innocent...


Anybody calling anybody else a loser is a pet peeve of mine.

It says that the other person is completely worthless. Nobody has the right to make judgments like that.

Yeah, it's just an insult and anybody can hurl and insult--and obnoxious people will. Fine.

That doesn't mean I have to respect the person who hurls it. More to the point, it makes me hurl.

Yes, I know I called some people obnoxious. I don't so much have a problem with insults, I just think they should be more specific.  :lol:

Julie
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Offline Nihilanthic

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #13 on: April 26, 2007, 02:18:55 AM »
protip:

He fucking typed up and printed this shit out. These weren't no handout signs.

He took EFFORT into doing all that nonsense. Thats the WTF...
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DannyB on the internet:I CALLED A LAWYER TODAY TO SEE IF I COULD SUE YOUR ASSES FOR DOING THIS BUT THAT WAS NOT POSSIBLE.

CCMGirl on program restraints: "DON\'T TAZ ME BRO!!!!!"

TheWho on program survivors: "From where I sit I see all the anit-program[sic] people doing all the complaining and crying."

Offline psy

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Motivational Seminar detritus at my workplace.
« Reply #14 on: April 26, 2007, 02:22:57 AM »
Quote from: ""Nihilanthic""
protip:

He fucking typed up and printed this shit out. These weren't no handout signs.

He took EFFORT into doing all that nonsense. Thats the WTF...


Lots of organizations (eg wallMart) use LGAT style seminars to "Motivate" their workforce.  I'm not surprised at all your boss took it to heart so much.  You should probably print out some Margaret Singer, Ofshe, or Lifton articles on LGATs and anonymously drop em on his desk.  Can't hurt.  Just don't get caught.
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