I know...it sounds like a lot of bullshit, and I don't want to admit it, but despite the emotional abuse, the verbal assaults and the humiliation Elan provided me with the tools to evaluate my behavior and weigh the cause and effect of my decisions. It hasn't always worked, but for the most part I'm still alive and I'm not locked under a prison for the rest of my life. I hold no animosity towards Elan, the sadistic staff (there were some good staff members) and I'm over the injustice, anger and resentment that I held for so long.