Surviving Straight Inc. - In Their Own Words

[Anne Bonney]

It's an analogy I use because it is extremely difficult to explain STRAIGHT to anyone who has not had first hand experience.

I spent a number of years immediately following Straight having nightmares about being confined and unable to escape. Even after waking, it took some time to realize I was safe.

From time to time, even now these nightmares will make an ugly appearance. It's easier for me to snap out of the fear because when I wake, I see my husbands face and I know that I am safe.

Same here.  For the first few years of our marriage I was jolted out of bed by that same fear a couple of times a week.  It only rears its ugly head now after I read Help At Any Cost or watch Over The GW (its on its way.  ordered it the other day and am more than a little nervous about watching it) or something similar.

"Existing" with no purpose. Your there, but your not. That is how I can begin to explain the emotions of being there.

I haven't allowed myself to fully place my brain back at the time of Straight. Does that make sense? LOL

Perfect sense.  There are still holes in my memory.  Some things are crystal clear while others are just gone.

What I remember, is all I want to remember for right now. I don't think I want too, but a part of me knows I need too.

For a long time, I'm not sure I even understood what was happening to me. I was young. I do know that I have issues, mostly trust issues. Who doesn't, right?

It's fucked up all the way around. What's more fucked up is that there are kids, just like us who are still trapped in these places.

Have you ever heard people say, "This is my job in life"? I believe my job, is to expose every business, person and funder who was involved with Straight. All of them.

Frod gave you some really good advice when he said don't rush it.  Let it come in the time frame its supposed to.   I still have to take periodic breaks from these boards.  It just gets overwhelming at times and I have to stop.

Hang in there.  It does get better.

 8-)  ::dove::

[Anne Bonney]

Get a wriggle on, Pirate y' skallaw

OMG SHOULD WE FORCE HIM 2 COVET THE PLANK ?

How do you covet a plank?

 ::bwahaha::

[Nikki]

Get a wriggle on, Pirate y' skallaw

OMG SHOULD WE FORCE HIM 2 COVET THE PLANK ?

How do you covet a plank?

 ANY 1 CAN COVET ANYTHING.  cov·et (kvt)
v. cov·et·ed, cov·et·ing, cov·ets
v.tr.
1. To feel blameworthy desire for (that which is another's). See Synonyms at envy.
2. To wish for longingly.

[Anne Bonney]

Get a wriggle on, Pirate y' skallaw

OMG SHOULD WE FORCE HIM 2 COVET THE PLANK ?

How do you covet a plank?

 ANY 1 CAN COVET ANYTHING.  cov·et (kvt)
v. cov·et·ed, cov·et·ing, cov·ets
v.tr.
1. To feel blameworthy desire for (that which is another's). See Synonyms at envy.
2. To wish for longingly.

So you wish longingly for a plank?  I still don't get it.  But its probably me.

[Nikki]

lol No I should have used a proper word. just giving my buddy a hard-time. He know's the deal. I remerber some great times. next time Frod n I will convince him 2 Baptise that Staightt wall so some one can capture the Kodak moment. i will miss u N.C.L.


So you wish longingly for a plank?  I still don't get it.  But its probably

[Nonconformistlaw]

It's an analogy I use because it is extremely difficult to explain STRAIGHT to anyone who has not had first hand experience.

I spent a number of years immediately following Straight having nightmares about being confined and unable to escape. Even after waking, it took some time to realize I was safe.

From time to time, even now these nightmares will make an ugly appearance. It's easier for me to snap out of the fear because when I wake, I see my husbands face and I know that I am safe.

"Existing" with no purpose. Your there, but your not. That is how I can begin to explain the emotions of being there.

I haven't allowed myself to fully place my brain back at the time of Straight. Does that make sense? LOL

What I remember, is all I want to remember for right now. I don't think I want too, but a part of me knows I need too.

For a long time, I'm not sure I even understood what was happening to me. I was young. I do know that I have issues, mostly trust issues. Who doesn't, right?

It's fucked up all the way around. What's more fucked up is that there are kids, just like us who are still trapped in these places.

Have you ever heard people say, "This is my job in life"? I believe my job, is to expose every business, person and funder who was involved with Straight. All of them.

Its a good anaolgy too.....I always took that dream as symbolic of how deeply damaged we all were by Straight. And it is extremely difficult to explain to people what Striaght was like....which is why I always say, the more of us that write about our experience, the better.

I have had the same nightmare, being confined and unable to escape with a few added things, the kidnapping and no one ever believing me. Only mine didnt start until I found the boards....which in my case was likely due to how deeply I suppressed and blocked Straight out altogether. Funny, as horrible as the nightmares are, I take it as a healthy thing. Does that make sense?

And yes it makes sense that you havent completely let yourself go there yet. I did that too, by not allowing myself to contact people I found that I actually remembered from Striaght. I started out by talking to people from other branches, not mine, in part because I was not completely ready to "go there." It took me months before I did that....

Oh and I completely get "This is my job in life" and the exact same "job description." I have sensed that since I was 20 years old.....its only the past 2 years since finding the boards that my "job description" has become crystal clear.

Hang in there....alot of us here completely get it.

[Anonymous]

Get a wriggle on, Pirate y' skallaw

OMG SHOULD WE FORCE HIM 2 COVET THE PLANK ?

How do you covet a plank?

 ANY 1 CAN COVET ANYTHING.  cov·et (kvt)
v. cov·et·ed, cov·et·ing, cov·ets
v.tr.
1. To feel blameworthy desire for (that which is another's). See Synonyms at envy.
2. To wish for longingly.

So you wish longingly for a plank?  I still don't get it.  But its probably me.

My plank is bigger than your plank.

[Nikki]

I DON'T WISH 4 THAT SILLY. THAT WAS ABOUT (MY FRIEND) STARRY -EYED PIRATE. I'M SORRY I HURT U BUT IF YOU BUT IF YOU R TRYING 2 ANTAGONIZE ME GOOD LUCK. IF U STILL DON'T COMPREHEND THE STUPID JOKE THEN RENDER IT. THAT MEANS FORGET.
TRYING 2 REEDEEM MY SELF WITH U. IS A HARD TASK,ANNE

LOVE, STEVE





How do you covet a plank?

 ANY 1 CAN COVET ANYTHING.  cov·et (kvt)
v. cov·et·ed, cov·et·ing, cov·ets
v.tr.
1. To feel blameworthy desire for (that which is another's). See Synonyms at envy.
2. To wish for longingly.[/quote]


So you wish longingly for a plank?  I still don't get it.  But its probably me.[/quote]

My plank is bigger than your plank.[/quote]

[Anne Bonney]

I DON'T WISH 4 THAT SILLY. THAT WAS ABOUT (MY FRIEND) STARRY -EYED PIRATE. I'M SORRY I HURT U BUT IF YOU BUT IF YOU R TRYING 2 ANTAGONIZE ME GOOD LUCK. IF U STILL DON'T COMPREHEND THE STUPID JOKE THEN RENDER IT. THAT MEANS FORGET.
TRYING 2 REEDEEM MY SELF WITH U. IS A HARD TASK,ANNE

LOVE, STEVE

I wasn't antagonizing you Steve.  I was joking around.  I won't let it happen again.

 :roll:

[Nikki]

LOL NO IT'S MY FUCKED-UP HEAD. I GET 2 EMOTIONAL WHEN I COME HERE. THANKS TO SEMBLER I WILL ALWAY'S B ENCOURAGEBLE. MAN, ANNE LET'S JUST "LIVE" NOW WEBDIVA, FROD, U N OTHERS R COOL IT'S ME. LOL

I wasn't antagonizing you Steve.  I was joking around.  I won't let it happen again.

 :roll:[/quote]

[Nonconformistlaw]

My webiste is back - the new url is  http://survivingstraightinc.com/home

Right before geocites shut down all geocities pages, I saved everything from that site. The petition and apology are there too.

Its all back up, a few things in different places, but damn close to exactly that way it was when geocities pulled the plug (DAMN THEM!!!)

If anyone wants to add their story please feel free - the more posted the better. Send stories to this email address - http://www.geocities.com/surviving_stra ... /index.htm

I created this site to document many str8 survivor stories (not just mine) in one place..... plus, it bothered me how scattered straight survivor stories are on the 'net for awhile now....

Mine is there along with links to other stories to get it started but I want more people to contribute. If you would like to add your story, check out the Submit Story link. If you submit yours, I will add a page for you and post it as soon as I recieve it.

Eventually there will be many straight survivor stories documented here...This is everyone's site to use...hope to see more stories added soon.[/quote]

[Nonconformistlaw]

Just to clarify something for everyone -I got a question emailed to me and wanted to share the answer.
I put up separate pages for each branch that the website already had stories for. If there is no page up
for a particular branch, it just means I dont have anything from there. If I get one for a branch without a page,
I will add a page for that branch.

[Che Gookin]

I'm just happy to see you around Nonconformistlaw.

[Nonconformistlaw]

Surviving Straight Inc - My website was created in 2006 to document many Straight survivor stories in one place..... I wanted a website that tells the Straight story in survivor's own words. I think the best way to tell the complete story is through many people's experience in Straight, how it effected them, etc. If anyone would like to add their story, check out the Submit Story link. I will post it as soon as I receive it. Thanks!?

http://survivingstraightinc.com/home - HOME PAGE
 
http://survivingstraightinc.com/submit_ ... nformation - SUBMIT STORY LINK


If submitting a story....

    * Length - any will be posted.
    * Content - up to you - your feelings, perspectives, thoughts about and experiences in Straight, Inc. will be respected and posted as is.
    * No revisions will be made - ie: no spelling errors corrected etc. I will not alter your submission in any manner.
    * Branch/location & years - please include.
    * Anonymous contributions welcome - please specify if you want your name omitted

***please note**** My site will NOT publish "pro Straight" submissions. Those who were injured or destroyed by Straight, Inc. deserve a page of their own. Please feel free to email your experience in Straight, Inc to be posted here to http://www.straightincthemovie.com/
Or, you may prefer the written format for whatever reason.
Or you may wish to do both...of course you can do both!

The point is....there are options!

Email submissions to surviving_straight_inc@yahoo.com