DysfunctionJunction-My Story

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

I have finally decided to come forward and share my story. I know how much you all admire me and have been on the edge of your seats after reading all my sage posts.
I am The King of this forum. Ginger loves me and I am allowed to have access to the inner workings of this site. Do NOT think for one minute that I do not know who you are. You are not anonymous to me- I can check all IP addresses and I WILL TRACK YOU DOWN.  
I was a fat little kid and everyone teased me. My parents hated me but they couldn't afford to send me away to a program. I wish they had. That is why I am so mad and jealous at everyone whose parents care enough about them to send them somewhere for help. I never got that help, so I decided to be a MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. I got my degree off of the internet.
I finally got a job at a wonderful, beautiful school called Hidden Lake Academy. It didn't take long for them to figure out that I didn't know what I was doing, though. I got fired. I never got another job, so I have lots of time to try to get revenge on Hidden Lake by posting on this board. I will not rest until I bring the place down.  If anyone DARES to defend ANY program, I try to destroy them. I am afraid that Hidden Lake might survive if ANY program gets a good report.  
Stay tuned for more on my interesting life.

[Troll Control]

On 2006-04-22 06:42:00, Dysfunktionjunktion wrote:

"I have finally decided to come forward and share my story. I know how much you all admire me and have been on the edge of your seats after reading all my sage posts.

I am The King of this forum. Ginger loves me and I am allowed to have access to the inner workings of this site. Do NOT think for one minute that I do not know who you are. You are not anonymous to me- I can check all IP addresses and I WILL TRACK YOU DOWN.  

I was a fat little kid and everyone teased me. My parents hated me but they couldn't afford to send me away to a program. I wish they had. That is why I am so mad and jealous at everyone whose parents care enough about them to send them somewhere for help. I never got that help, so I decided to be a MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. I got my degree off of the internet.

I finally got a job at a wonderful, beautiful school called Hidden Lake Academy. It didn't take long for them to figure out that I didn't know what I was doing, though. I got fired. I never got another job, so I have lots of time to try to get revenge on Hidden Lake by posting on this board. I will not rest until I bring the place down.  If anyone DARES to defend ANY program, I try to destroy them. I am afraid that Hidden Lake might survive if ANY program gets a good report.  

Stay tuned for more on my interesting life."

This is the Carlbrook troll who is so overly invested in me that she can't live without me.  How flattering!

BTW, this exemplifies the level of functioning of some parents who use the services of these facilities - very low-brow.

Well, my simian-browed personal troll, thanks for taking the time to make a complete fool of yourself for everyone to see.  Pretty pathetic...

No wonder your kids were so screwed up.

_________________
"Compassion is the basis of morality."

-Arnold Schopenhauer[ This Message was edited by: Dysfunction Junction on 2006-04-22 06:53 ]

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

I need to pretend to be offended, but I really want my story out there. I will be immortalized in the annals of fornits.
I am not a troll- I am the real DysfunktionJunktion.
I am a Hidden Lake expert. Carlbrook only matters because I couldn't get a job there when I applied. No one would hire me. That is why I can't work. Hidden Lake warned everyone.
Boo hoo.

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

I should add that I don't have kids. I really don't know anything about children since all I do is type on a keyboard. I tried to learn about kids at Hidden Lake. They were so cute- I just wanted to hug and kiss them all. My boss didn't like that. That is part of why I got fired.
Does anyone know of a job I can have?

[Troll Control]

On 2006-04-22 07:02:00, Dysfunktionjunktion wrote:

"I should add that I don't have kids. I really don't know anything about children since all I do is type on a keyboard. I tried to learn about kids at Hidden Lake. They were so cute- I just wanted to hug and kiss them all. My boss didn't like that. That is part of why I got fired.

Does anyone know of a job I can have?"

look how low program parents will go.  ::puke::

[Anonymous]

I know how low program parents can go, but I am DETERMINED to go even lower. That is why I attack anyone who ever dares to disagree with me.  I have vowed to be vicious and to personally attack and destroy the reputation of anyone who expresses an opinion contrary to mine. I wake up in the middle of the night to make sure nothing has slipped by me.
Please help me get over my obsession with Hidden Lake? They are getting ready to sue me for my lies about them, but I CAN'T STOP.  I HAVE to punish the school for firing me. I have to keep lying about the school so no parents will put a kid there and it will go bankrupt.  
I need help.  Please.

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

That post was mine, of course. I got logged out. I guess Hidden Lake found me and destroyed my ID. They are out to get me.

[Anonymous]

::cheers::

[Fake Parent Troll]

On 2006-04-22 06:42:00, Dysfunktionjunktion wrote:

"I have finally decided to come forward and share my story. I know how much you all admire me and have been on the edge of your seats after reading all my sage posts.

I am The King of this forum. Ginger loves me and I am allowed to have access to the inner workings of this site. Do NOT think for one minute that I do not know who you are. You are not anonymous to me- I can check all IP addresses and I WILL TRACK YOU DOWN.  

I was a fat little kid and everyone teased me. My parents hated me but they couldn't afford to send me away to a program. I wish they had. That is why I am so mad and jealous at everyone whose parents care enough about them to send them somewhere for help. I never got that help, so I decided to be a MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. I got my degree off of the internet.

I finally got a job at a wonderful, beautiful school called Hidden Lake Academy. It didn't take long for them to figure out that I didn't know what I was doing, though. I got fired. I never got another job, so I have lots of time to try to get revenge on Hidden Lake by posting on this board. I will not rest until I bring the place down.  If anyone DARES to defend ANY program, I try to destroy them. I am afraid that Hidden Lake might survive if ANY program gets a good report.  

Stay tuned for more on my interesting life."

If you have some free time can you send me a PM about HLA. It sounds like a wonderful place for my D and H, they are both in need of alternative placement. They both hate me, and I hate them. I have plenty of money to spend and I don't care about credentials or any of that stuff, I trust you completely. Thank you so much DJ, I don't know what I would do without you.
















PS: I know you turned me down for being a terd-eating fatty, but if you could think it over some more like I asked I would be super happy.

[Fake Parent Troll]

I don't think you "decide" the way you are suggesting. Circumstances change and kids change. If you asked me when my D was 14 if I would send her to boarding school at 16, I would have told you "No Way". But when she was unhappy in her elite private day school at the end of her sophomore year and it was suggested to us that we look at Interlochen for her, I was open to the idea. It took visiting the school and seeing that there was a totally different option for her- one that we had never considered.
To tell you the truth, it is not all that easy having my son home for Christmas break! I worry every time he is out with the car. When he is away at school he isn't driving and his day seems very orderly. I am glad to see him, of course, but I seem to sleep a little better when he is at school.
When you send a kid to boarding school, you aren't banishing them from your household. They are home all summer (or a lot of the summer) and the breaks tend to be longer than what public schools have. You can go visit and attend parents' weekend, athletic events etc. I talk to my son almost every day (probably more than he would like) and we chat online. He is not the type of kid who would sit by our side every evening if he were home.
It is just one option and one choice.
Karen

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

Karen- I am so glad you contacted me. I love you and I thought you had rejected me because of what I did the last time we went out. I'm so sorry about my behavior and that I forgot to bring a change of clothes.
Please give me another chance.

[Dysfunktionjunktion]

Why is this thread now about Karen? I want it to be about ME. Don't take the attention away from ME by bringing in Karen. Iknow that is how I always colored all the issues and attacked others, but I want to focus on DysfunctionJunction-my very own self. I really enjoyed being mean and disgusting to Karen, but that was just so I could feel powerful and remain teh KING of the forum. If we start talking about Karen, then nothing bad gets said about me and I don't get my feelings hurt. When I get my feelings hurt, I have to attack Karen so everyone on the forum will see how clever and smart I can be and how I can hurt other people. I am wonderful and everyone needs to see that.
Please love me- that is all I want. Don't let Karen or any of the other programmies be mean to me because I am the LORD.

[Fake Parent Troll]

I went to large state U (Indiana), which was out of state for me. I chose it because I was a music major. Well, turned out the music school was too good for MY level of talent! I wound up majoring in business and going to a top law school (Chicago). In retrospect, I did not have enough "like minded peers" at Indiana. I enjoyed many things about my years there, but academically I would have been happier and more challenged at a smaller university or LAC. I did develop a passion for college basketball, which, believe it or not, has served me very well in the business world. (Lesson to all you smart kids out there- don't underestimate things like that.)
My problem is as I tour colleges with kid #2, I love them all. I was the same way with kid #1. All in all, Stanford would be my dream school because of the top academics, athletics, climate and size of the school. I couldn't have gotten in back then, of course.
Karen

[Fake Parent Troll]

Have any of you had to deal with some major "blips" in your educational path? My son got kicked out of a disastrous boarding school in March of his soph year do to a combination of factors- some his issues, some the school's. None of the issues were academic. He spent a year in a very structured boarding school with good academics and a strong support system and was admitted to a top prep boarding school in the NE where he is doing a 2nd junior year and will do a senior year. His academics were strong throughout all this upheaval. His emotional growth has been impressive, and he is regarded as a mature young man and a strong contributor to his current school. He is also likely to be a recruited runner which he will use to help him get an edge for some top schools. Everyone on this board seems so exceptional- any situations similar to ours? Thanks. Karen

[Anonymous]

On 2006-04-22 08:10:00, KarenInDallas wrote:

"Have any of you had to deal with some major "blips" in your educational path? My son got kicked out of a disastrous boarding school in March of his soph year do to a combination of factors- some his issues, some the school's. None of the issues were academic. He spent a year in a very structured boarding school with good academics and a strong support system and was admitted to a top prep boarding school in the NE where he is doing a 2nd junior year and will do a senior year. His academics were strong throughout all this upheaval. His emotional growth has been impressive, and he is regarded as a mature young man and a strong contributor to his current school. He is also likely to be a recruited runner which he will use to help him get an edge for some top schools. Everyone on this board seems so exceptional- any situations similar to ours? Thanks. Karen "

Yes, my son was in a similar situation. Nothing worked; not therapists, boarding schools or anything else.
What finally worked, after careful research and EdCon payments, was spanking him. Yes, yes, I know, spanking went out of fashion with the twist, but hear me out.
When my teenage son misbehaves, I call him over to me, put him over my lap, pull down his trousers and give him a big smack right on his patoot. I caught him smoking pot, and gave him four hundred and twenty spankings just so he would not forget.
Carlbrook has perfected this method, I am doing a seminar there soon for the new employees. We all have blips in our child's path to glory, but you must not forget to spank, Karen. I am close to Dallas if you would like an Educational Consultation.