Recent Hyde Graduate . . .

[Rwrush]

Reading many of the messages on this site have left me as a Hyde former Hyde student frustrated and confused as to what parents in this country are teaching their children.  Most of the messages I have read seemed to portray Hyde as an institution that does not place the value on education, in either a character or academic sense.  I would like to take this opportunity to contradict this opinion with my own.  
In my two years of attending Hyde and my four (and counting) years involved with the schools I have seen and been part of many significant life changes.  To hear how the school "brain washes" kids and parents that come through and somehow convinces them to take part in an "inferior" educational process seems to me to be blatant ignorance.  In fact, those words were very similar to mine when I was a 16 year old sibling in the Hyde program.  To go along with this point, I WAS also afraid of anything that might be challenging to me in any substantial way.  
Through my time at Hyde there were many moments that I wanted to back down and run from my fears and problems like most kids my age, but my parents would not allow me to do this, they took a stand where most parents would back down and let me live my life of mediocrity.  I went from a scared child with bad grades, a poor work ethic, no direction and no real sense of self to a young man who not only knows who I want to be, but that no matter what happens I have a group of people who believe in me and would support me regardless of my life circumstances.  
I grew in many ways and am quickly maturing into a young man of standards and honor, standards that I am disappointed to say I don?t see many of my peers in college pursuing.  I would attribute this success to my time at Hyde School.  I was given an environment that I truly wish everyone could experience and give a chance, contradictory to what many people on this site seem to believe, EVERYONE COULD USE HYDE.  
Now in a more direct response to some of the opinions that I have read, I would like to site some of the comments that I have reviewed.  Perhaps the most troubling to me was this "Shame on Joe Gauld - and shame on his pathetic family followers and other weird followers......." This statement truly captures and gives justice to my point.  A process with is undoubtedly hard and requires personal sacrifice of emotional comfort and time BUT has worked for thousands of families and students is hardly pathetic.  Joe Gauld has helped change thousands of lives, for the better by having the courage to face, accept and tell the truth, to everyone he meets.  From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.  While I am by no means saying that this encompasses every family/student that attends and then leaves Hyde I firmly believe that this is the case in the majority.  I have personally seen parents selfishly take themselves and their comfort with feeling in control and strong more seriously than their job and commitment as a parent at least 50 times, and not once has it benefited the student.  Usually this has to do with the parent?s lack of willingness to give the Hyde Process a chance in their own lives.  Wrapping up as I believe I have said most of what I have to say at the moment, I do to stress as well to all those who I directly challenged their commitment to their job as a parent that before you get all fired up at me and this comment, remember that it is you that your children learn the most from and most directly reflect in most ways, your decisions will and have reflected in many different ways in their lives, before you quit on yourself again and the Hyde process altogether, remember and have the courage to face, like many Hyde parents before you, that you do have a huge and vital role to play in who your young man/woman grows up to be.  Don't teach them to run from their fears and mistakes.

Thoughtfully,
Richard Rush
Class of 2005
Freshman at Syracuse University
rwrush@syr.edu

P.S. I would love to get some response for further discussion at my e-mail.

[Lars]

I appreciate your thoughts, but I have to tell you that I think that your experience puts you in very small minority of people who attended.  I would definately take issue with your statement that Joe Gauld has changed thousands of lives for the better.  Undoubtedly, some folks do benefit from the place, but for many like myself, the constant drama & confrontation made it a brutal, soul-sucking, cult-like experience.  To put it another way, I graduated from Hyde and have gone on to a successful career and I will NEVER go back.  Understand that the people who hate the place are not just people who "cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them."  To the contrary, many who can't stand Hyde are people of strong moral character who recoiled at the emotionally humiliating and intellectually stifling atmosphere of the place.  The principles they preach are, in and of themselves, fine.  But the ways in which they try to instill them are often abusive, wrong-headed and even criminally negligent.  You seem to buy into their mantra that their way is the right way for everyone - It isn't, not by a long shot.

I'm glad you had positive experience.  Some do.  But take it from someone who stuck it out through the whole process (and, contrary to what one of the trolls on this board claimed, worked hard & busted ass to get a diploma), there are good reasons why most of us who made it through that place never look back, my venting on this board notwithstanding.

Hope that helps.  If not, read over the earlier posts on this site. Some are crap, but there's some powerful messages to ponder.  Don't take this wrong way, but given some of the phrasing you use, you may not have realized that many good people suffered terribly for reasons other than "not having the courage to face the truth" - consider how horrible it would be to have a serious affliction like clinical depression treated as a character problem.  It happens there all the time.

Food for thought...

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 20:48:00, Rwrush wrote:

"Reading many of the messages on this site have left me as a Hyde former Hyde student frustrated and confused as to what parents in this country are teaching their children.  Most of the messages I have read seemed to portray Hyde as an institution that does not place the value on education, in either a character or academic sense.  I would like to take this opportunity to contradict this opinion with my own.  

In my two years of attending Hyde and my four (and counting) years involved with the schools I have seen and been part of many significant life changes.  To hear how the school "brain washes" kids and parents that come through and somehow convinces them to take part in an "inferior" educational process seems to me to be blatant ignorance.  In fact, those words were very similar to mine when I was a 16 year old sibling in the Hyde program.  To go along with this point, I WAS also afraid of anything that might be challenging to me in any substantial way.  

Through my time at Hyde there were many moments that I wanted to back down and run from my fears and problems like most kids my age, but my parents would not allow me to do this, they took a stand where most parents would back down and let me live my life of mediocrity.  I went from a scared child with bad grades, a poor work ethic, no direction and no real sense of self to a young man who not only knows who I want to be, but that no matter what happens I have a group of people who believe in me and would support me regardless of my life circumstances.  

I grew in many ways and am quickly maturing into a young man of standards and honor, standards that I am disappointed to say I don?t see many of my peers in college pursuing.  I would attribute this success to my time at Hyde School.  I was given an environment that I truly wish everyone could experience and give a chance, contradictory to what many people on this site seem to believe, EVERYONE COULD USE HYDE.  

Now in a more direct response to some of the opinions that I have read, I would like to site some of the comments that I have reviewed.  Perhaps the most troubling to me was this "Shame on Joe Gauld - and shame on his pathetic family followers and other weird followers......." This statement truly captures and gives justice to my point.  A process with is undoubtedly hard and requires personal sacrifice of emotional comfort and time BUT has worked for thousands of families and students is hardly pathetic.  Joe Gauld has helped change thousands of lives, for the better by having the courage to face, accept and tell the truth, to everyone he meets.  From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.  While I am by no means saying that this encompasses every family/student that attends and then leaves Hyde I firmly believe that this is the case in the majority.  I have personally seen parents selfishly take themselves and their comfort with feeling in control and strong more seriously than their job and commitment as a parent at least 50 times, and not once has it benefited the student.  Usually this has to do with the parent?s lack of willingness to give the Hyde Process a chance in their own lives.  Wrapping up as I believe I have said most of what I have to say at the moment, I do to stress as well to all those who I directly challenged their commitment to their job as a parent that before you get all fired up at me and this comment, remember that it is you that your children learn the most from and most directly reflect in most ways, your decisions will and have reflected in many different ways in their lives, before you quit on yourself again and the Hyde process altogether, remember and have the courage to face, like many Hyde parents before you, that you do have a huge and vital role to play in who your young man/woman grows up to be.  Don't teach them to run from their fears and mistakes.



Thoughtfully,

Richard Rush

Class of 2005

Freshman at Syracuse University

rwrush@syr.edu



P.S. I would love to get some response for further discussion at my e-mail.

"

I am very pleased to know that you had a good experience at Hyde.  I have no doubt that some Hyde graduates value and benefit from their experience.  I'm not at all interested in challenging your beliefs about how useful the experience was for you.

I know from my own experience at Hyde that many students and parents do not share your views.  You seem to suggest, like many people affiliated at Hyde, that things don't work out well there ONLY when parents don't invest themselves in the Hyde experience and when students/parents aren't willing to take responsibility and address their character and attitude issues.  I don't doubt that what you say is true in some cases.  

However, I know for a fact that many students have a hard time at Hyde because their needs are not being met, or cannot be met, by the Hyde model.  As you probably know from your 2 years there, many students are admitted to Hyde with moderate to serious mental health issues.  Since our family started at Hyde a couple of years ago we've encountered, directly, an enormous number of students with diagnosed clinical depression, eating disorders, substance abuse problems, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorders, etc.  As many parents have commented on this website, Hyde does not offer mental health services for these students.  Often the kids who end up on 2-4 or in more serious trouble at Hyde (academically or otherwise) are kids who clearly need help and aren't getting it at Hyde.  Have you noticed how high the attrition (drop-out) rate is at Hyde?

Hyde's approach is that every behavioral issue is an attitude or character issue.  That's definitely true in some instances, but in many the student's story is much more complicated.  We've talked with quite a few parents who have decided to withdraw their child from Hyde -- not because they aren't committed to examining their own attitudes -- but because Hyde cannot meet their kids' needs.  The harsh environment that many students experience at Hyde is not a good fit given their mental health needs.  More and more educational consultants are discovering Hyde's shortcomings.

The problem is compounded sometimes in discovery groups, family seminars, and FLCs, where very complex and sensitive issues come up and there's no one in the room who has training to handle them.  I've seen first-hand how some of these sessions become volatile, emotionally distressing, etc. and the facilitator doesn't know how to handle it.  This can be very destructive for some participants.  

I'm glad to know that you appreciate Joe Gauld.  Obviously some people have a good experience with him.  Many, however, do not.  Perhaps you haven't witnessed his periodic tirades and emotional assaults on parents and students.  His behavior at times is terribly unprofessional and harmful.  

I think it's important that you acknowledge that your Hyde experience is not necessarily the same as everyone else's.  I hope you've read the many postings on this website where parents have described their very painful, harmful Hyde experiences (you have to sort through some silly and inappropriate comments too). There are lots of very bad Hyde stories (unprofessional and unethical conduct by Hyde staff, poor teaching, emotional abuse, etc.), with facts to back them up, to go along with your good story.  That doesn't detract from your good story; but your good story doesn't erase the horrible experiences many of us have had.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 21:38:00, Lars wrote:

"I appreciate your thoughts, but I have to tell you that I think that your experience puts you in very small minority of people who attended.  I would definately take issue with your statement that Joe Gauld has changed thousands of lives for the better.  Undoubtedly, some folks do benefit from the place, but for many like myself, the constant drama & confrontation made it a brutal, soul-sucking, cult-like experience.  To put it another way, I graduated from Hyde and have gone on to a successful career and I will NEVER go back.  Understand that the people who hate the place are not just people who "cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them."  To the contrary, many who can't stand Hyde are people of strong moral character who recoiled at the emotionally humiliating and intellectually stifling atmosphere of the place.  The principles they preach are, in and of themselves, fine.  But the ways in which they try to instill them are often abusive, wrong-headed and even criminally negligent.  You seem to buy into their mantra that their way is the right way for everyone - It isn't, not by a long shot.



I'm glad you had positive experience.  Some do.  But take it from someone who stuck it out through the whole process (and, contrary to what one of the trolls on this board claimed, worked hard & busted ass to get a diploma), there are good reasons why most of us who made it through that place never look back, my venting on this board notwithstanding.



Hope that helps.  If not, read over the earlier posts on this site. Some are crap, but there's some powerful messages to ponder.  Don't take this wrong way, but given some of the phrasing you use, you may not have realized that many good people suffered terribly for reasons other than "not having the courage to face the truth" - consider how horrible it would be to have a serious affliction like clinical depression treated as a character problem.  It happens there all the time.



Food for thought...  

   "

Thanks, Lars, for posting your comments about what happened to you at Hyde.  I'm sure Rush is telling it like it is from his point of view.  That's great that he had a good experience at Hyde.  But my own experience at Hyde is much more similar to yours than Rush's.  Every once in awhile I come across someone who talks about Hyde the way Rush does; often they're NOT the heavy duty "turnaround" kids that make up most of the kids who get sent to Hyde by their frustrated parents (I find they are more likely to be siblings of former Hyde students, Hyde faculty and staff kids, etc.).  Much more common are comments like yours.

After associating with Hyde people (students and parents) now for several years I have a very strong feeling that there are tons of people out there who had miserable experiences at Hyde and were afraid to speak up while there because they didn't trust Hyde staff.  I know from my own experience that people who openly criticized Hyde or threatened to leave paid for it in the form of harassment, emotional abuse, pressure and manipulation.  Obviously some people, like Rush, made it through Hyde in good shape.  I can't begin to tell you how many people I have encountered who feel very scarred by their Hyde experience.  The sad thing is that those who are super angry often leave Hyde in a hurry and don't want to look back.  Unfortunately most parents looking at Hyde don't hear about all of those unhappy people.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 20:48:00, Rwrush wrote:

"Reading many of the messages on this site have left me as a Hyde former Hyde student frustrated and confused as to what parents in this country are teaching their children.  Most of the messages I have read seemed to portray Hyde as an institution that does not place the value on education, in either a character or academic sense.  I would like to take this opportunity to contradict this opinion with my own.  

In my two years of attending Hyde and my four (and counting) years involved with the schools I have seen and been part of many significant life changes.  To hear how the school "brain washes" kids and parents that come through and somehow convinces them to take part in an "inferior" educational process seems to me to be blatant ignorance.  In fact, those words were very similar to mine when I was a 16 year old sibling in the Hyde program.  To go along with this point, I WAS also afraid of anything that might be challenging to me in any substantial way.  

Through my time at Hyde there were many moments that I wanted to back down and run from my fears and problems like most kids my age, but my parents would not allow me to do this, they took a stand where most parents would back down and let me live my life of mediocrity.  I went from a scared child with bad grades, a poor work ethic, no direction and no real sense of self to a young man who not only knows who I want to be, but that no matter what happens I have a group of people who believe in me and would support me regardless of my life circumstances.  

I grew in many ways and am quickly maturing into a young man of standards and honor, standards that I am disappointed to say I don?t see many of my peers in college pursuing.  I would attribute this success to my time at Hyde School.  I was given an environment that I truly wish everyone could experience and give a chance, contradictory to what many people on this site seem to believe, EVERYONE COULD USE HYDE.  

Now in a more direct response to some of the opinions that I have read, I would like to site some of the comments that I have reviewed.  Perhaps the most troubling to me was this "Shame on Joe Gauld - and shame on his pathetic family followers and other weird followers......." This statement truly captures and gives justice to my point.  A process with is undoubtedly hard and requires personal sacrifice of emotional comfort and time BUT has worked for thousands of families and students is hardly pathetic.  Joe Gauld has helped change thousands of lives, for the better by having the courage to face, accept and tell the truth, to everyone he meets.  From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.  While I am by no means saying that this encompasses every family/student that attends and then leaves Hyde I firmly believe that this is the case in the majority.  I have personally seen parents selfishly take themselves and their comfort with feeling in control and strong more seriously than their job and commitment as a parent at least 50 times, and not once has it benefited the student.  Usually this has to do with the parent?s lack of willingness to give the Hyde Process a chance in their own lives.  Wrapping up as I believe I have said most of what I have to say at the moment, I do to stress as well to all those who I directly challenged their commitment to their job as a parent that before you get all fired up at me and this comment, remember that it is you that your children learn the most from and most directly reflect in most ways, your decisions will and have reflected in many different ways in their lives, before you quit on yourself again and the Hyde process altogether, remember and have the courage to face, like many Hyde parents before you, that you do have a huge and vital role to play in who your young man/woman grows up to be.  Don't teach them to run from their fears and mistakes.



Thoughtfully,

Richard Rush

Class of 2005

Freshman at Syracuse University

rwrush@syr.edu



P.S. I would love to get some response for further discussion at my e-mail.

"

I'm curious to know how you found this website.  Did someone from Hyde tell you about it?  Did they ask you to post a comment to describe your positive experience?

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 20:48:00, Rwrush wrote:

In my two years of attending Hyde and my four (and counting) years involved with the schools I have seen and been part of many significant life changes.  

This puts things into perspective.  How are you involved with the schools since graduating?

[Anonymous]

I find people like Rush very sincere in what his feelings are.  I also find that it is typical of Hyde's fans to invalidate what others might have experienced.  Hyde prides itself on "truth" and no offense Rush, but how truthful are you being when you say that Hyde does have a good education system?  It is a fact this is not true and that most Hyde students fall well behind in academics compared to other boarding schools.  Education is not a focus at Hyde nor does Hyde have a high percentage of good educators with Degrees you would find at other boarding schools.  Something else that is not typical at other good boarding schools is the turnover rate of teachers, staff and students that you find at Hyde.  Hyde has a much higher turnover rate of teachers than most boarding schools.  I can attest to this through my own experience and through investigating other schools.  All that one needs to do is to copy the staff page from one year to the next.  It is quite frightening!

I also question the constant practice of making students repeat a grade.  The typical response to this is that the student is not ready to progress because of his "attitude."  When I was at Hyde the parents felt that many times the real reason behind this was to keep the monies flowing!  I would like to know how the others on this board feel about this practice.

In short Rush, I am glad you had a positive experience at Hyde and I thank you for sharing your experience. My intent is not to invalidate what you have shred, but to give another prospective and to share my own experience as I have in other posts.  I do notice that the parents and students who have had positive experiences seem to all use the same words and paraphrases.  This is a concern to me and also more proof of Hyde being very similar to a Cult.

[Anonymous]

The following post is from another thread, but would not have been noticed because it was under the "Family Foundation."  If you are posting about Hyde, please use the Hyde threads only so we can all benefit by seeing it!

THIS HYDE BOARD WILL NOT GO AWAY, AND PARENTS AND FORMER STUDENTS WILL MAKE SURE OF IT!! HYDE IS A TERRIBLE SITUATION FOR ANY CHILD OR FAMILY TO EXPERIENCE. WITH ALL THE INTELLIGENCE OUT THERE, EVENTUALLY HYDE WILL BE FOUND OUT. WE NEED AS A GROUP OF CONCERNED PARENTS TO HELP RAISE AWARENESS FOR THESE "UNREGULATED, PRIVATE, SCHOOLS" THAT REALLY JUST "DAMAGE" OUR CHILDREN AND EMPTY OUR BANK ACCOUNTS. HYDE DOES NOT HAVE ONE LISCENCED MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL ON STAFF??? YET THEY ENROLL CHILDREN WITH VARIED MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES? THERE ALSO IS NO DOCTOR ON STAFF?? AND A SCHOOL NURSE DISPENSING MED'S? YET THERE ARE MANY CHILDREN ENROLLED WHO ARE ON MEDICATIONS. DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE? MANY TEACHERS ARE STRAIGHT OUT OF COLLEGE, WITH NO EXPERIENCE, WALKING INTO A SITUATIO WHERE KIDS ARE REALLY "INVOLVED" AND NEED SOMEONE TO FACILITATE WITH EXPERIENCE. SO CALLED "THERAPY SESSIONS" ARE RUN BY GENERAL STAFF, NO ONE WITH A DEGREE??? THIS SCHOOL, IF WE CAN CALL IT THAT, IS UP AND RUNNING BECAUSE PARENTS ARE DESPERATE AND SCARED ABD WILL DO ANYTHING TO HELP THEIR KIDS.IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILTY TO TAKE THIS TYPE OF FACILITIES "OUT". A GROUP JUST APPEARED BEFORE CONGRESS DISCUSSING JUST THIS - THE REGULATING OF THESE SO CALLED PRIVATE, EMOTIONAL GROWTH, CHARACTER DEVELOPING SCHOOLS.IT IS UP TO US, ALL OF US, TO KEEP THE QUESTIONS COMING, AND BE AS LOUD AS WE CAN BE, SO THAT CHANGE CAN HAPPEN. OUR KIDS FUTURES ARE AT STAKE.

[TheWho]

****From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.*****

Richard -- Thanks for your candid response.  This holds true of other schools also.  I have seen more bitterness and anger from those students and parents who started the process and didnot finish vs those who finished and did not succeed.  The parents who pulled their kids early, for what ever reason, are saddled with never knowing how their lives would have changed if they had finished the program.  This elevates the feeling of failure vs those who finished (gave it a try) and did not grow by the experiences.

[Troll Control]

On 2006-01-16 11:11:00, Anonymous wrote:

"****From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.*****



Richard -- Thanks for your candid response.  This holds true of other schools also.  I have seen more bitterness and anger from those students and parents who started the process and didnot finish vs those who finished and did not succeed.  The parents who pulled their kids early, for what ever reason, are saddled with never knowing how their lives would have changed if they had finished the program.  This elevates the feeling of failure vs those who finished (gave it a try) and did not grow by the experiences.



"

Gimme a break, programmie. ::bangin::  ::puke::

[Lars]

On 2006-01-16 11:11:00, Anonymous wrote:

"****From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.*****



Richard -- Thanks for your candid response.  This holds true of other schools also.  I have seen more bitterness and anger from those students and parents who started the process and didnot finish vs those who finished and did not succeed.  The parents who pulled their kids early, for what ever reason, are saddled with never knowing how their lives would have changed if they had finished the program.  This elevates the feeling of failure vs those who finished (gave it a try) and did not grow by the experiences.



"

Maybe you don't realize that there alot of people who DID see it through to graduation and want nothing to do with the place.  Most of them move on and never look back, hence you don't hear as much from them.  It was fifteen years after my graduation when I posted on this board about how miserable it was.  Some finish the program and grow when they move on to a healthier environment.  It's typical Hyde arrogance to assume that everyone who finished grew so much because of it while the bitter ones are those who didn't finish.

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-16 15:40:00, Lars wrote:

"

On 2006-01-16 11:11:00, Anonymous wrote:


"****From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.*****





Richard -- Thanks for your candid response.  This holds true of other schools also.  I have seen more bitterness and anger from those students and parents who started the process and didnot finish vs those who finished and did not succeed.  The parents who pulled their kids early, for what ever reason, are saddled with never knowing how their lives would have changed if they had finished the program.  This elevates the feeling of failure vs those who finished (gave it a try) and did not grow by the experiences.





"

Maybe you don't realize that there alot of people who DID see it through to graduation and want nothing to do with the place.  Most of them move on and never look back, hence you don't hear as much from them.  It was fifteen years after my graduation when I posted on this board about how miserable it was.  Some finish the program and grow when they move on to a healthier environment.  It's typical Hyde arrogance to assume that everyone who finished grew so much because of it while the bitter ones are those who didn't finish."

I agree completely: It is incredibly arrogant to assume that anything good that happened in people's lives after Hyde happened because of Hyde.  I know quite a few people who had horrible Hyde experiences and have landed on their feet mainly because they got out of Hyde and ended up in much more effective, humane programs run by people who actually have sophisticated training and education in how to work with struggling teens.  The number of people who work at Hyde without relevant training, and who are there only because they buy into the Hyde rhetoric and cliches, is scary.  It's amazing to compare the training and education that staff at many schools for struggling teens have compared with the many unqualified staff at Hyde.  Just amazing.  At Hyde it isn't at all unusual to find staff who are very young, have virtually no formal training or education in work with struggling teens, have nothing more than a college degree, and who don't have the personal experience or maturity to know how to handle challenging teens in a constructie or effective way.  I've met many Hyde staff who seem to really get off on the amount of power and authority they have, and who then treat some of the students in emotionally abusive ways.  Unfortunately, Joe Gauld provides these young staff with a role model of someone who abuses his authority, and these young staff follow his lead.  Gauld may care about the students, but he's so full of himself that he often mistreats people terribly. No wonder many Hyde staff mimic Gauld's style.  They simply don't have the experience or maturity to do otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Ditto on what Richard said...

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 20:48:00, Rwrush wrote:


"Reading many of the messages on this site have left me as a Hyde former Hyde student frustrated and confused as to what parents in this country are teaching their children.  Most of the messages I have read seemed to portray Hyde as an institution that does not place the value on education, in either a character or academic sense.  I would like to take this opportunity to contradict this opinion with my own.  


In my two years of attending Hyde and my four (and counting) years involved with the schools I have seen and been part of many significant life changes.  To hear how the school "brain washes" kids and parents that come through and somehow convinces them to take part in an "inferior" educational process seems to me to be blatant ignorance.  In fact, those words were very similar to mine when I was a 16 year old sibling in the Hyde program.  To go along with this point, I WAS also afraid of anything that might be challenging to me in any substantial way.  


Through my time at Hyde there were many moments that I wanted to back down and run from my fears and problems like most kids my age, but my parents would not allow me to do this, they took a stand where most parents would back down and let me live my life of mediocrity.  I went from a scared child with bad grades, a poor work ethic, no direction and no real sense of self to a young man who not only knows who I want to be, but that no matter what happens I have a group of people who believe in me and would support me regardless of my life circumstances.  


I grew in many ways and am quickly maturing into a young man of standards and honor, standards that I am disappointed to say I don?t see many of my peers in college pursuing.  I would attribute this success to my time at Hyde School.  I was given an environment that I truly wish everyone could experience and give a chance, contradictory to what many people on this site seem to believe, EVERYONE COULD USE HYDE.  


Now in a more direct response to some of the opinions that I have read, I would like to site some of the comments that I have reviewed.  Perhaps the most troubling to me was this "Shame on Joe Gauld - and shame on his pathetic family followers and other weird followers......." This statement truly captures and gives justice to my point.  A process with is undoubtedly hard and requires personal sacrifice of emotional comfort and time BUT has worked for thousands of families and students is hardly pathetic.  Joe Gauld has helped change thousands of lives, for the better by having the courage to face, accept and tell the truth, to everyone he meets.  From my experience, and take it as you will, those who leave Hyde with a bitter taste in their mouths are those who cowardly shrank from the tasks in front of them, parents afraid to truly invest and teach their children, or students afraid to face themselves.  While I am by no means saying that this encompasses every family/student that attends and then leaves Hyde I firmly believe that this is the case in the majority.  I have personally seen parents selfishly take themselves and their comfort with feeling in control and strong more seriously than their job and commitment as a parent at least 50 times, and not once has it benefited the student.  Usually this has to do with the parent?s lack of willingness to give the Hyde Process a chance in their own lives.  Wrapping up as I believe I have said most of what I have to say at the moment, I do to stress as well to all those who I directly challenged their commitment to their job as a parent that before you get all fired up at me and this comment, remember that it is you that your children learn the most from and most directly reflect in most ways, your decisions will and have reflected in many different ways in their lives, before you quit on yourself again and the Hyde process altogether, remember and have the courage to face, like many Hyde parents before you, that you do have a huge and vital role to play in who your young man/woman grows up to be.  Don't teach them to run from their fears and mistakes.





Thoughtfully,


Richard Rush


Class of 2005


Freshman at Syracuse University


rwrush@syr.edu





P.S. I would love to get some response for further discussion at my e-mail.


"

I'm curious to know how you found this website.  Did someone from Hyde tell you about it?  Did they ask you to post a comment to describe your positive experience?

So you're implying that anyone who comes here and posts something positive has been asked to do so by Hyde?

[Anne Bonney]

 So you're implying that anyone who comes here and posts something positive has been asked to do so by Hyde?

Out of all of that above that was said and discussed that's the only thing you're going to address???