why i didn't split from st.pete.......

[Anonymous]

for those of you that don't know me,hi,i'm matt/hippie{my nickname,i didn't want it but the ppl where i live gave it to me}....i was in str8 during just about the entire "miller newton tenure"....he came into str8 just before i got there.my whole program was under his tyranny/dictatorship.....my program was very long and very hard on me....i was there for 28 1/2 months and i did everything 2 times,even my 5th phase vacations{i was on day 128 of my 1st 5th phase when they started me over}...on my 3rd day there,i realised after 3 really hard confrontations just the day before,that i wanted out of this place!i knew escape was futile,and wound up "faking" a suiside to get out because i thought it was a sure fire way to get sent somwhere else...boy was i wrong!i didn't even go to a hospital to get sewn up,they took me to a dingy building on the outer fringes of st pete and into a small dimly lit "make shift" doctors office!there,a man whom i had never seen before or after the ordeal,sewed my hand up.....it was never reported to any of the proper authorities and my parents,who were there to see me getting my hand sewn up,ignored my pleas to get me out and listened to the staff instead of following thier gut feelings....at the time,after the ordeal was done and i was on my way back to str8,i thought my parent didn't care or love me anymore......

[Anonymous]

your parents loved you I guess, but they were fucked up and passed on their parental responsibilty to someone else because they were too lazy or shiftless to deal with a teenager them selves, just like my parents.   I feel like I can say that as my son is now 25, was a handful, but I didn't ship him off to be fixed - that would be shirking my responsibilties.

[Anonymous]

when i got back,it was open meeting/my first introdution!lol...looking back,i doubt anyone put thier kid{s} in because of my intro's...i had to do it with a stiched up,banaged up,elevated left hand!if you can imagine..."hi, i'm matt,i'm a druggie,this place is so great i sliced my hand up in here!".....miller spoke up when i was done to clear the "air" about why my hand was stitched up! he told everyone in there that it was an attention game and how druggies will do anything to get themselves "pulled" from the program!it was then that i knew i was going to be the "hot" subject of str8 after the open meeting was done...they didn't let me down!at open meeting review,i was placed in front of the group...to my surprise,there was a girl up there too,that had also done the same thing....coincidence? i don't think so.....they drilled her for a short time and she was started over,then they turned thier attention to me....i was hammered really hard....much longer than she was.i think this is because of 2 things:i did my attempt under his watch{in the guys bathroom},and i had to do my introduction also....so everyone inthe building saw what i did!basically,i embarassed him in front of all the parents!more or less after that didn't work,i realised my next plan was to make a higher phase and then leave.....

[Anonymous]

when i made 2nd phase,i'd love to tell you i flew right through and decided that i liked it there etc,but that would be a lie.....somtime deep in my days on 2nd phase,maybe 50 days on it and about 120 days there,somthing strange was going on.....what,was unknown,but you could feel it in the air by the way staff was acting....nobody was allowed to go anywhere....not school,work,days off or permissions etc etc!as we went into the group room,i noticed that an oldcomer,adam,who was on 4th phase,was sitting on the 1st phase side....he looked beat up,tired and dirty....so did a newcomer todd....staff told the 5th phasers not to talk to them and not to talk to anyone in group....little did i know that what i was bout to see would leave profound impact on me.......

[Anonymous]

there was a very strange quietness in the group room....i know everyone was wondering what was going on...shit,we weren't even singing songs,not that i minded that,but i had been there long enough to know that whatever was going on,was real bad.....i kept looking at Adam...i couldn't remember him getting started over,but everytime you blinked,somthing was going on....i figured it must have happened when i was cleaning the building the day before....!then Miller Newton came in.....in those days,you knew somthing was really wrong or somones heads were going to roll because thats the only time you saw him in the group room....he never came in to encourage us or participate for the sheer delight of helping us...he looked around at the group and ppl,i believe out of fear of him,started motivating...then he said,"Todd %$&&* stand your ass up!" he had Todd stand in the middle of group.....just like he did to me on my 3rd day there!Todd,who had done just about every crazy thing you could imagine to get out of there,had a very scared look on his face.....you know,looking back,i can't and don't remember Todd ever saying anything in group ever....even when his parents said things to him in open meeting!In open meeting review,he never got confronted for not working his program,earning talk etc!it was as if he had a permanent "pay me no mind"ticket while he was in there!Apparently,Todd and his oldcomer Adam, had split the program from his other oldcomers house{Adam was from Atlanta},stole a car and some money and got caught somwhere down the highway......they,he and Adam,had spent the night in an intake room...i'm sure that was no picnic and it explained why they looked so beaten up and tired.....the group trashed him for about 1 hr....even when he was getting confronted,he never spoke!it was as if he was in another world! After all the "acting crazy" Todd did in str8 to get out,Todd finally got his wish,and he was sent to Arcadia mental institution!when they were done with Todd 4 oldcomers were picked by Newton and i never saw or heard from Todd again.....it would be amazing to know what happened to him after str8!to see if he is alive or dead etc!after having been there for 2 yrs,Miller didn't just release him,he sent him to one of the worst Fla. mental hospitals in the state!i'm sure Todd wasn't like that when he came in,but after "acting crazy" all that time,he became crazy!......

[Anonymous]

when Todd was out of the room,Miller stood Adam up!the group started going crazy!he too,was placed in the center of group.....for 3 hrs,ppl confronted Adam in every way possible!they hit him,yelled at him,called him every degrading name you could think and even his cousin,who was in the program,did his deal on Adam....at some point,Adam started laughing crazy...the smile on his face was really wierd....this only infuriated Miller more and then more confronting was done!I only blended in with the others.....i didn't want to confront him....i honestly didn't see the point in it!he had already been blasted by most of the group...what was i going to say that would be different?i wanted to know why and what happened to him that would cause him to leave...shit he had been on 4th phase 2 times!if he had rode it out,he wouldv'e made 5th phase and then graduated.....at some point,i noticed Adam wasn't smiling anymore...he was crying....he knew he had screwed up again.i got bored and my eyes started to wander...just then,in the corner of my eye,i saw it!in the back of group,way in the back,was a cop......i thought this was strange...str8 didn't like outside influences,and especially cops!what the hell was a cop doing there? i was about to find out.....Apparently Adam,in his intake,was court ordered to the program thanks to Miller and we were about to witness Miller Newton's cruelty at it's best! just as i was asking myself what the f- was going on,Adam,who was already crying,was shaking uncontrolably.....i think he knew what Miller was doing! he started pleaing for his life!asking Miller to forgive him....what happened next,would remain in my mind the rest of my life!Miller Newton,who said "you're going to get str8 whether you want to or not!"or"you're going to get str8 no matter how long it takes!" was releasing Adam to the constable....Adam kept pleaing to Miller,but it fell on deaf ears!....then he quieted the group and motioned for the cop to come up....the constable said "Adam &&&84""you're under arrest for....."and listed every nit picky charge he could throw at Adam.....then he pulled out 2 pairs of handcuffs and some chains and put them on Adam......Adam was freaking out....the constable had to get help from some of the staff to finish putting the cuffs and chains on him...i couldn't believe mt eyes!i don't think anyone could!Adam was crying like a crzy man!.....me? i was looking at all the ppl that had a "hand"in the confrontation of Adam....i don't think anyone thought it would come to this...i'm sure this smoked everyones brain!then with the help of the staff members,he literally had to drag Adam away...Adam was still pleading for his life as he went out the door......there were a lot of ppl crying...i know that not everyone agreed with what they had just seen,but there was NOTHING we could do to change it!

[Anonymous]

when Adam had been gone for an hr{in that hr we ate a quick luch},Miller came back out to the group....ppl started motivating....then he called on the host brother of Adam's.....before he could get 3 words out of his mouth,his was blasted by the group!how was Adams splitting his fault? i was blown away.....an hr later and many set backs later,Miller said"the group is doing bad!"DOING BAD? what the hell is he talking about?.....i was about to see.he went over and talked to Jim Sailor,a sr staff member and then Jim had some 5th phasers put the "fake wall or room divider out.....i thought we were going to separate the girls and guys,but no that wasn't what was going on.....Miller left,then Jim had us spread out our chairs.....i thought this is funny,guys and girls rarly did exersizes together!as we started doing the "exersizes" i saw Jim go over to the thermostat and fiddle with it...i thought cool! we're almost done with the exersizes and they're going to let us cool off by putting tha air conditioning on....at first,as always,the air was warm...shit it was july/august in Fla.,but it kept getting warmer and warmer ....they put on the heat!in july/august in Fla. they put on the heat!they kept the exersizes going....on and on we exersized!ppl started dropping,convulsing etc...only 5th phasers were allowed to "tend" to them.....it got so hot in there that a STEAM was created...can you believe it? F-ing STEAM!!!!we were sweating so bad that the sweat had no more clothing to absorb into,so it ran literally off our clothing and onto the floor...the walls got so wet with sweat that the film,from manyyrs of dust collecting on them were running like a lady wearing mascara!no shit!I'M NOT MAKING ANY OF THIS UP!!!!!! when we were finally done exersizing,Jim had the only outside doors opened....then the freakiest thing happened....the air outside,and this is Fla.,was COLDER THAN THE AIR INSIDE THE BLDING! it had a chemical reaction when the two mixed,and created more steam!.....in all my years alive i don't think i witnessed anything crazier.....after what i saw that day....i decided i was never going to try and split....besides all that,where was i going to go?i was 500+ miles from home and i knew from my experience with my parents on my 3rd day there,that i would just be taken back to str8 ...thats why i never tried to split...hippie564

[Anonymous]

after many months rolled by,the smell of the sweat from that day of exersizing in the heat never really went away.....the 7 step signs,5 criteria signs and the 3 signs signs were forever molded/moldy....a constant reminder to me and anyone else that was there that day....as to what happened to Todd and Adam.....for that matter anyone else that had a telephone pole shoved up thier ass that day too.....hippie564

[starry-eyed pirate]

...an interesting story...so it is...hippie.

[Anonymous]

thankyou pirate.....hip

[funster]

thanks for talking about that.

[Anonymous]

Hippie, I remember those.  Bust ass raps was what they ended up calling them and they were utilized whenever group was determined to "be in a bad place".  :roll:  They were a favorite of Jim, William and Miller's.  They'd wall off the carpet room, herd us all in there, have us put on jackets and turn up the heat.  Hell, they even brought in the big garbage cans for us to puke in.  You're right about that smell.  I don't think it ever did come out of that place.

[Antigen]

On 2006-01-10 11:32:00, Anonymous wrote:

"your parents loved you I guess, but they were fucked up and passed on their parental responsibilty to someone else because they were too lazy or shiftless

Oh, it's not all like that. When you first dropped your kid off at daycare, was he scared? Did he cry and hang onto you and beg you not to leave him? And did the professional childcare workers advise you to pretend it didn't bother you and just turn your back and walk away? And did you take their advice?

Yeah, me too. "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."
Douglas Adams, _Last Chance to See_

Being sleepy can impair someone's ability to do thier job.  People
can sleep at home and come to the job with sleepiness still in their system. The sleepiness can still be there long after the employee has slept. When someone is found to be sleepy on the job, they can claim that they went to sleep the night before.  The only solution to this problem is to ban employees from sleeping.

--Arthur Slabosky

[Anonymous]

On 2006-01-10 15:31:00, Antigen wrote:

"

On 2006-01-10 11:32:00, Anonymous wrote:


"your parents loved you I guess, but they were fucked up and passed on their parental responsibilty to someone else because they were too lazy or shiftless

Oh, it's not all like that. When you first dropped your kid off at daycare, was he scared? Did he cry and hang onto you and beg you not to leave him? And did the professional childcare workers advise you to pretend it didn't bother you and just turn your back and walk away? And did you take their advice?

"nope, never put my kid in child care.

[Anonymous]

for those of you that don't know me,hi,i'm matt/hippie{my nickname,i didn't want it but the ppl where i live gave it to me}....i was in str8 during just about the entire "miller newton tenure"....he came into str8 just before i got there.my whole program was under his tyranny/dictatorship.....my program was very long and very hard on me....i was there for 28 1/2 months and i did everything 2 times,even my 5th phase vacations{i was on day 128 of my 1st 5th phase when they started me over}...on my 3rd day there,i realised after 3 really hard confrontations just the day before,that i wanted out of this place!i knew escape was futile,and wound up "faking" a suiside to get out because i thought it was a sure fire way to get sent somwhere else...boy was i wrong!i didn't even go to a hospital to get sewn up,they took me to a dingy building on the outer fringes of st pete and into a small dimly lit "make shift" doctors office!there,a man whom i had never seen before or after the ordeal,sewed my hand up.....it was never reported to any of the proper authorities and my parents,who were there to see me getting my hand sewn up,ignored my pleas to get me out and listened to the staff instead of following thier gut feelings....at the time,after the ordeal was done and i was on my way back to str8,i thought my parent didn't care or love me anymore......