« Reply #5 on: October 01, 2001, 07:34:26 PM »
More than allegations
Check again, please. I gave you a link to some old news items that tell the tale of successful lawsuits and Ken (who was a proud graduate of Straight, Cincinatti for some years) gave you some info on a more recent criminal conviction (not just an allegation, a conviction... though in my opinion it landed on the wrong party)
No, we're not all a bunch of program failures. When I left Straight, Sarasota in `82 I was on 5th phase, pretraining for staff. Many, if not most of the people who post to this forum are graduates and/or former staff or parents. Most of us are doing alright, though a few have come through here who aren't alright at all.
There are very real and sometimes longterm side effects from the isolation, humiliation and pressure tactic used in these programs. If you're not comfortable with the way they're treating the parents, please know that your son is getting it in spades and has no escape, not even a moment of privacy to reflect.
Right now, you have more factual information about what's going on at GT right now than any of us. Not to put too fine a point on it, I know you're in a tough situation and trying your best to do what's right, but I'd like for you to examine the way you're staging the question.
Apparently you're unable to speak with your son or you wouldn't be asking strangers what's going on inside GT. Is that correct? And, instead of asking if any of us have any reason to believe you should be concerned, you seem to be asking whether or not any of us has absolute proof that something is wrong.
In essence, you've turned your son over to total strangers; never even having met with anyone who's completed the program; you don't seem to have any reason to believe that they're not abusing him and you do have ample reason to believe that these same people have abused children in the past.
Mm. or sir, I cannot give you absolute proof that they're doing bad things to your son in there. But I'd get him the hell out of there if I were you just on what you've got so far.
As for what to do next, almost anything is better than abandonment. I know you don't see it that way. The Program staff is probably giving you all kinds of strokes for being such a good parent, paying all the money, attending meetings, dealing with the anguish of not being able to see your son or know that he's safe.
But if GT today is anything at all like they were in the past and like all of the other programs run by the same affiliated people (and I have no reason to believe otherwise), they're telling him just exactly that; your parents don't want you or they wouldn't have brought you here, they wouldn't believe you even if you did tell them what we're doing to you. This is very often true. I'd bet dollars to donoughts they're telling you that you aren't capable of knowing whether or not your son, who you've known and loved all these years, is lying to you. They tell you they have 'special awareness' in dealing with teenagers (asif teenagers were some kind of wild animal and not just young people) and that only they can determine when he's telling the truth. (i.e. when he breaks down and supports their story on any particular point)
All of these bad behaviors you attribute to your son are very definitely cause for concern. But none of them are new to this generation. What did people do with wayward kids for the past couple of hundred generations? Send them to a different environment (boarding school, rural relatives, whatever); keep them busy with various activities; encourage them to do something better, different; let them fall down (but don't cause them to!) and then be there to support them and give direction when they realize they've messed up and ask for help....
There is no simple solution to raising kids no matter how much money and commitment the Program coaxes out of you. If things seem fishy to you for some reason after a month, trust your gut. Like so many other kids, your son will probably learn from his mistakes and outgrow his wild ways even without any help. But it's a lot easier to get situated in life when you have family to depend on.
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"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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