Tania " Tony" Merret Chronicles

[The Elan Reporter]

Tania Merret, born Tony Merret obsessed with being a female finally has dream come true. With the help and finacial back ground of the Riccis, they helped pay for his operation to become a full time female.

Sadly funds ran low and more money was needed to help alter the voice box, But Tania "Tony" Merret decide that "IT" would live with it.

[The Elan Reporter]

Marty Kruglik wears Tony Merrets clipped off penis around his neck.

Marty claims that wearing a clipped off penis helps ward off evil spirits and bring a warrior such as himself great success in hunting expeditions and in battle.

Go figure.....

[Elan Reporter's Assistant]

When Marty is feeling down or has a bad day because Sharon has reprimanded him too much, he sulks back to his tepee, where he take Tony Merette's clipped-off penis and sucks it like a pacifier.  Sometimes, if he's feeling generous, he'll give it to Kickapoo too.  Usually, he'll just kick Kickapoo out of the tepee, moan a Great Spirit child molestation prayer and suck on the severed penis until he falls asleep, chanting "hi-yuh hi-yuh" mournfully.

Occasionally, if his self-esteem is really low, Marty will sit in a corner and face the wall while pushing Tony Merette's penis into his rectum.  He calls this "me suh personal LE."  Occasionally, he will give himself a Mongoloid Indian verbal reprimand for a more satisfying experience.

[The Elan Reporter]

On 2005-08-26 09:52:00, Elan Reporter's Assistant wrote:

"When Marty is feeling down or has a bad day because Sharon has reprimanded him too much, he sulks back to his tepee, where he take Tony Merette's clipped-off penis and sucks it like a pacifier.  Sometimes, if he's feeling generous, he'll give it to Kickapoo too.  Usually, he'll just kick Kickapoo out of the tepee, moan a Great Spirit child molestation prayer and suck on the severed penis until he falls asleep, chanting "hi-yuh hi-yuh" mournfully.



Occasionally, if his self-esteem is really low, Marty will sit in a corner and face the wall while pushing Tony Merette's penis into his rectum.  He calls this "me suh personal LE."  Occasionally, he will give himself a Mongoloid Indian verbal reprimand for a more satisfying experience."

 :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:

[Anonymous]

:rofl:  :rofl:

And they wonder why we respect the Hi-yuh!!!!

This stuff is great ---- "Great Spirit child molestation prayer"  oh my fucking god!!! you guys are sick, twisted, depraved, and funny as all hell!!!!   Keep it up, and don't let the naysaying assholes bring you down.  They are just jealous of your talents and fans.  I, for one, will continue to respect the Hi-Yuh!!!!

[The Elan Reporter]

It is also said that legend has it that Marty Kruglik also has the amputated testicles of Tony Merret. Marty uses them for gambling games such as craps and dice.

Marty who anually uses a sharpie black magic marker to remark dice spots said that those were his lucky dice. Marty usually has them on his person in a small tipis made buffalo skin pouch.

The testicles which have been preserved by an elan school science teacher also act as one of Martys favorite sex toys.

Legend also has it that Kruglik has used them in the past for hunting and war dancing around bon fires.

[The Elan Reporter]

Marty Kruglik once said and promised: Me suh will collect all severed body parts that come off of Tony Merret, me suh love Tony Merrets severed body parts.



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Author of: "The Way of the Kruglik"[ This Message was edited by: The Elan Reporter on 2005-08-31 05:49 ]

[Anonymous]

On 2005-08-31 05:49:00, The Elan Reporter wrote:

"Marty Kruglik once said and promised: Me suh will collect all severed body parts that come off of Tony Merret, me suh love Tony Merrets severed body parts.







_________________

Brought to you by The Elan Reporter, the only reliable source for all your up to date Elan happenings.



Author of: "The Way of the Kruglik"[ This Message was edited by: The Elan Reporter on 2005-08-31 05:49 ]"

hi-yuh hi-yuh hi-yuh hi-yuh

[The Elan Reporter]

Pink, what happened to all your hi yuh yuh music?