I only found this forum a short time ago, but I find myself spending more time here than I would have expected.
It provides me withan opportunity to peek inside the door I closed when I left. All of those people I called my friends, those I feared and those I would have gotten to know better under different circumstnces, as well as those I never would have interacted with at all. We had some very intense and not so intense experiences together, regardless of the total time involved.
We are bound by common experiences in spite of the varoius time frames and evolution of the program. - the inability to share anything but positive emotions, denial of the negative although both were present, only the mix varies
The forum provides other viewpoints which have have made me look at things from another angle and re-evaluate some things I thought I had tied down - confirmned some things I assumed then, but later doubted and vice versa.
It's like pulling things back form the memory hole. I have thought more about that time in the past several weeks than ever. I have been trying to pull back the names and faces from the lost days. those who left before me and those I left behind - almost all were lost to me.
I think it would be good to sit down over a beer or otherwise and chat with some of the old group but I fear this is as close as I will get to that.
It does me good to read of some of the things I remember happening, and about the unspoken events (dissapearences, restarts, relationships, etc.)