Author Topic: Relationship Issues  (Read 5196 times)

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Offline thepatriot

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« on: December 09, 2006, 08:37:53 PM »
God why am I plagued with this shit.........I just can't share my SPACE with anyone.....WTF, I just want to take a deep breathe and have everything better....it just don't get any better.  just drink more and more. I have to have a liver biopsy in Jan. Guess I am trying to drink myself to death...can you say "Leaving LasVegas! if your familiar with that movie. I don't undertand why I am sooooo haunted by this Straight shit.................FUCK I wish it would just go the fuck away...................................................................................
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arasota Straight Escapee

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2006, 09:16:54 PM »
Smoke weed, patriot....

It'll do you better than alcohol at this point...

Just don't kill yourself!
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #2 on: December 09, 2006, 09:41:22 PM »
Patriot,

I had a good friend and onetime roommate drink himself to death (literally--he had survived a .68 yeah, you read it right, .68 BAC, was in a coma for a week , got out of the hospital and started driniking again) and it is not pretty.  

I know the Straight stuff can get you down, particularly when you're in a relationship with someone who has no idea whatsoever what happened to us there.  You are not alone in being alone, if that makes any sense.

Do you smoke pot?  It really is a llot less destructive to the body than drinking, and a LOT of people from here say that it has helped them deal with the Straight shit.  I'm not talking about the chronic drugusers here, I'm talking about people who don't do any other drugs but pot.  Maybe it would help.  It's worth a try, at least, if you are already having health problems from alcohol.  

Try to step back for a minute, don't let yourself be forced into reacting in a way you don't want to, or that will juswt cause more problems for you and yours later.  You just became a grandpa, that's gotta give you some kind of incentive, you will want to be there when they are growing up, not just a vague memorry or a warning story" Yeah, your grandfather drank too much" or whatever.  You seem like a pretty smart guy who can get focusedc on things when you really want to....there's nothing in the worlsd that has happened to you yet that is worth going out in a puke-filled, piss on yourself drunken stupor.  It ain't pretty, it's actually pretty fucking sickening when you see it really happening.  Hardcore alcoholics are worse off than junkies, you really don't want to go there.  THe fact that you are able to post about it indicatwes that you are not too far gone on the shit yet.  You can be., if you want to, but I don't think that'sd your style.  I think you've got a bit too much pride to let yourself go that far.  I hope so.  

Things do   get rough from time to time, and that sucks.  But I think you can deal with it, without drinking yourself into oblivion.  It ain't easy, but it's doable.  

I don't have any great words of wisdom or anything, I just hope you get whatever it is figuired out.  A little weed probably wouldn't hurt you, and might save your life.  What have you go t to lose?
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Offline Anonymous

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hang in there Mr. Patriot
« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2006, 08:28:15 AM »
Hang in there.   Try and slow down on the booze.   Don't let the straight fuckers win.
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Offline Carmel

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« Reply #4 on: December 10, 2006, 12:38:49 PM »
I agree that pot is alot less destructive to the system....however, and I say this at my own peril amoungst the marijuana advocates here.......pot isnt a long term answer, nor is any other substance.  

Its probably a good idea to replace the drinking with something less volatile.....but you also need an "exit plan".  We werent born needing to consume anything in excess in order to function on a regular basis.....even water can kill you if you drink too much of it.  

The idea I think is to really be willing to identify what drives us to feel and behave in the destructive ways that we do.  Otherwise, drugs are just a band aid.  Just another way among hundreds of ways to avoid making a different choice about how we see the world.  I dont believe people become addicted to drugs....I think they become addicted to emotional states whether positive or negative and do everything they can to stay within the zone of that state....many times that can include using something in excess.

What makes you angry?  What makes you vulnerable?  How do you feel cheated?  What are your resentments?  What makes you happy?  I think being able to react to these questions in a really honest way REPEATEDLY is the only way to fix emotional problems.  That all being said, I think pot's a good extension plan, not a long term resolution.  Your choices that put you into situations that are negative really wont ever change along with your substance usage.
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Offline Antigen

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« Reply #5 on: December 10, 2006, 03:24:54 PM »
The trouble here, I think, is that for us there ain't no normal to get back to. We all got an extra potent slice of the mindfuck perpatrated on the rest of society a whole lot more gradually and subtlly than the way we got it. It's impossible to unsee and very, very difficult to pretend. There's just not enough beer in the world to make it go away completely. So most people think we're fuckin nuts and paranoid talking about this shit. And if you surround yourself with them others, why then after awhile you begin to believe it too. So I've decided to hang w/ fellow former pows who get it.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #6 on: December 10, 2006, 04:55:49 PM »
At this point, I'd have to say that I damn well know what I know despite who it is that I happen to be hanging out with.. Whether it's "them others" or you all, my mind is made up. To be honest, I'd prefer solitude over hanging with the survivors who are still over-obsessed with Straight. The people who talk about it all the time and who spend their precious time being activists turn me off in a bad way. Say what you want, but that's where I'm at. It's a personal thing. Most days, I'd rather watch a good football game than talk about Straight.

You all can keep talking about finding missing documents, how you're going to shut down PFC or whatever. That's fine, those places suck... but I wonder how many people in your personal lives you neglect because you "have more important things to do." As the saying goes, charity (among other things) begins at home. Have you spent any quality time with your loved ones (if any) in the midst of your gossiping?

I just wonder sometimes, that's all.

Don't get me wrong, there is some good work being done, I just hope that it isn't too much at anyone else's expense. Have you hugged you kid today? How about your dog? Wow, it's already dark and you haven't been anywhere....

Another day.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #7 on: December 10, 2006, 05:31:30 PM »
Quote from: ""BLACK SABBATH""
At this point, I'd have to say that I damn well know what I know despite who it is that I happen to be hanging out with.. Whether it's "them others" or you all, my mind is made up. To be honest, I'd prefer solitude over hanging with the survivors who are still over-obsessed with Straight. The people who talk about it all the time and who spend their precious time being activists turn me off in a bad way. Say what you want, but that's where I'm at. It's a personal thing. Most days, I'd rather watch a good football game than talk about Straight.

You all can keep talking about finding missing documents, how you're going to shut down PFC or whatever. That's fine, those places suck... but I wonder how many people in your personal lives you neglect because you "have more important things to do." As the saying goes, charity (among other things) begins at home. Have you spent any quality time with your loved ones (if any) in the midst of your gossiping?

I just wonder sometimes, that's all.

Don't get me wrong, there is some good work being done, I just hope that it isn't too much at anyone else's expense. Have you hugged you kid today? How about your dog? Wow, it's already dark and you haven't been anywhere....

Another day.


I totally agree!
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #8 on: December 10, 2006, 06:14:58 PM »
I like hating people.
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Offline Anonymous

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don't hand me that psychobabble doubletalk
« Reply #9 on: December 10, 2006, 06:15:17 PM »
Quote from: ""Carmel""
I agree that pot is alot less destructive to the system....however, and I say this at my own peril amoungst the marijuana advocates here.......pot isnt a long term answer, nor is any other substance.

Yes, marijuana is a long term Solution.  It is harmless, and actually provides many health benefits, both physically and psychologically.  Check out the "More Truths About Marijauna" thread.  It's factual info over there.  How would you know what  the effects of long-term, "chronic" marijuana use?  You don't do it yourself, and you obviously haven't done any real research, other than maybe read some anti-drug literaure.

Quote


Its probably a good idea to replace the drinking with something less volatile.....but you also need an "exit plan".  We werent born needing to consume anything in excess in order to function on a regular basis.....even water can kill you if you drink too much of it.  

No, but we were born with receptors for cannabinoids, which indicates that Homo Sapiens Sapiens has evolved in a symbiotic relationship with marijuana.  We weren't born needing to consume anything?  What about [i[food[/i]?  And that is what marijuana is akin to, food, NOT "drugs" or whatever other boogeyman you want to use to frighten people away from a healing plant that you obviously have no knowledge of.

Quote

The idea I think is to really be willing to identify what drives us to feel and behave in the destructive ways that we do.  Otherwise, drugs are just a band aid.  Just another way among hundreds of ways to avoid making a different choice about how we see the world.  I dont believe people become addicted to drugs....I think they become addicted to emotional states whether positive or negative and do everything they can to stay within the zone of that state....many times that can include using something in excess.

What makes you angry?  What makes you vulnerable?  How do you feel cheated?  What are your resentments?  What makes you happy?  I think being able to react to these questions in a really honest way REPEATEDLY is the only way to fix emotional problems.  That all being said, I think pot's a good extension plan, not a long term resolution.  Your choices that put you into situations that are negative really wont ever change along with your substance usage.


Look. dude has some serious issues going on, ones that he could deal wioth very effeectively by smoking marijuana.  He doesn't need all the psychobabble, NEw Age, "talk about your feelings crap.  Patriot seems like a man, a real man, and doesn't seem like the type to go for hugs and tears at theholistic healing center.  He could do quite well on his own, with a little help from Mary Jane.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #10 on: December 10, 2006, 06:16:24 PM »
Quote from: ""BLACK SABBATH""
At this point, I'd have to say that I damn well know what I know despite who it is that I happen to be hanging out with.. Whether it's "them others" or you all, my mind is made up. To be honest, I'd prefer solitude over hanging with the survivors who are still over-obsessed with Straight. The people who talk about it all the time and who spend their precious time being activists turn me off in a bad way. Say what you want, but that's where I'm at. It's a personal thing. Most days, I'd rather watch a good football game than talk about Straight.

You all can keep talking about finding missing documents, how you're going to shut down PFC or whatever. That's fine, those places suck... but I wonder how many people in your personal lives you neglect because you "have more important things to do." As the saying goes, charity (among other things) begins at home. Have you spent any quality time with your loved ones (if any) in the midst of your gossiping?

I just wonder sometimes, that's all.

Don't get me wrong, there is some good work being done, I just hope that it isn't too much at anyone else's expense. Have you hugged you kid today? How about your dog? Wow, it's already dark and you haven't been anywhere....

Another day.


Damn right.  Jags kicked Indy today, too, and it was fucking SWEET!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #11 on: December 11, 2006, 01:53:54 AM »
Blew away some TV's ::unhappy:: , went fishing with the kids, took out the trash, raked some leaves, burned them, listened to the Skins blow it again, came to fornits, that's about it  8-)
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Offline Carmel

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Re: don't hand me that psychobabble doubletalk
« Reply #12 on: December 11, 2006, 11:17:11 AM »
Quote from: ""WEEDAdvocate""
Quote from: ""Carmel""
I agree that pot is alot less destructive to the system....however, and I say this at my own peril amoungst the marijuana advocates here.......pot isnt a long term answer, nor is any other substance.

Yes, marijuana is a long term Solution.  It is harmless, and actually provides many health benefits, both physically and psychologically.  Check out the "More Truths About Marijauna" thread.  It's factual info over there.  How would you know what  the effects of long-term, "chronic" marijuana use?  You don't do it yourself, and you obviously haven't done any real research, other than maybe read some anti-drug literaure.

Quote


Its probably a good idea to replace the drinking with something less volatile.....but you also need an "exit plan".  We werent born needing to consume anything in excess in order to function on a regular basis.....even water can kill you if you drink too much of it.  

No, but we were born with receptors for cannabinoids, which indicates that Homo Sapiens Sapiens has evolved in a symbiotic relationship with marijuana.  We weren't born needing to consume anything?  What about [i[food[/i]?  And that is what marijuana is akin to, food, NOT "drugs" or whatever other boogeyman you want to use to frighten people away from a healing plant that you obviously have no knowledge of.

Quote

The idea I think is to really be willing to identify what drives us to feel and behave in the destructive ways that we do.  Otherwise, drugs are just a band aid.  Just another way among hundreds of ways to avoid making a different choice about how we see the world.  I dont believe people become addicted to drugs....I think they become addicted to emotional states whether positive or negative and do everything they can to stay within the zone of that state....many times that can include using something in excess.

What makes you angry?  What makes you vulnerable?  How do you feel cheated?  What are your resentments?  What makes you happy?  I think being able to react to these questions in a really honest way REPEATEDLY is the only way to fix emotional problems.  That all being said, I think pot's a good extension plan, not a long term resolution.  Your choices that put you into situations that are negative really wont ever change along with your substance usage.

Look. dude has some serious issues going on, ones that he could deal wioth very effeectively by smoking marijuana.  He doesn't need all the psychobabble, NEw Age, "talk about your feelings crap.  Patriot seems like a man, a real man, and doesn't seem like the type to go for hugs and tears at theholistic healing center.  He could do quite well on his own, with a little help from Mary Jane.


This is what I dont understand.  Why do people have to become so defensive about this issue?  I didnt say anything intended to scare people away from marijuana...or that it was even bad.  Please re-read my statement....YES we need food, yes we need water, yes we need air...I am not a moron....but we dont need any of these things in EXCESS....read that? In EXCESS.

I am actually trying to address a totally separate issue.  Ive said it a million times....it doesnt matter if its food or pot or sex or fast cars or ant farms or model planes......you are choosing to accuse me of attacking your substance of choice, and thats just not accurate. If we are adressing one issue in excess and neglecting others....then we are not in balance, and that statement doesnt have anything to do with your healing plant.  REAL men and women have the confidence to confront ALL aspects of their own reality, that includes pain and sadness....whether they find that in a New Age seminar or a bad b-horror flick.....so dont use that machismo crap as an excuse.  I never said Patriot needed a big circle jerk of holistic mumbo jumbo.....I said that he needed to have the guts to decide whats really causing the problem, because substance use doesnt seem to be doing the trick.....not that it might not work for someone else, see?

And i dont read anti-drug literature. My husband uses pot on an almost daily basis, so i do have very personal experience with the effects of such usage.  THAT DOES NOT MEAN ITS THE SAME FOR YOU, but I am only human and only capable of relating to others based on my experience, as are you i imagine.  Not to mention for the mind-freeing effects you should be exepriencing from your cure-all, you sure are closed to anyone elses perspective.  

I am a healthcare worker, and yes i do employ holistic methodology in what i do.  Smoking pot IS a holistic cure by the way.  But i see people every day who just want the "cure"....and dont want to do anything else to bring their bodies back into balance.  Thats what modern western medicine does these days...give em a pill but dont recommend that they stop eating pizza three times a day or sitting their ass on the couch all the time.  The pill is useless without the lifestyle change.  Its the same for pot, its a remedy yes.....but if you dont do anything else except smoke pot your problems arent going to change, just get covered over.  Please, dont you see i am not attacking pot?  I am saying that pot isnt special...effective? YES....healthy? YES......in a category of its own when being used as a health or emotional remedy? NO.....just like everything else....its subject to the same rules. I may not have a Phd in Cannabis, but I do have education and experience in observing people habits and lifestyles as they relate to good health and function.....and no substance in and of itself trumps all the components of true homeostasis....period. Thats not a rant against pot, its a simple fact about all life as we know it.

I tell people every day who i work with.....you are in pain? you have headaches?  you cant sleep?  Yes...they say.  First question is what they are drinking, eating etc.  and it never fails.....well MAYBE if you didnt drink 10 cokes a day and only one glass of water, you'd feel a little better....but coming to see me isnt going to help until you start at the source of the problem.  I tell people this because I am RESPONSIBLE about my practice.  I dont go around telling people that if they do this ONE THING that I advocate, its gonna fix their problems...thats just not responsible.  And im not a pussy or a new age wack-job for giving a damn about peoples pain.

I am not telling him not to smoke pot....thats coming from YOUR closed ideaology, I am telling him that YES one substance is alot more healthy than the other, but looking for the answer in the same bed with your problem might not be the best effective idea.  Its a RESPONSIBLE observation, not a selfish selling point on what  I think is the only answer FOR him.
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Offline Anonymous

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too much is better than not enough
« Reply #13 on: December 11, 2006, 11:30:05 AM »
Quote from: ""Carmel""
I am a healthcare worker, and yes i do employ holistic methodology in what i do.  Smoking pot IS a holistic cure by the way.  But i see people every day who just want the "cure"....and dont want to do anything else to bring their bodies back into balance.  Thats what modern western medicine does these days...give em a pill but dont recommend that they stop eating pizza three times a day or sitting their ass on the couch all the time.  The pill is useless without the lifestyle change.  Its the same for pot, its a remedy yes.....but if you dont do anything else except smoke pot your problems arent going to change, just get covered over.  Please, dont you see i am not attacking pot?  I am saying that pot isnt special...effective? YES....healthy? YES......in a category of its own when being used as a health or emotional remedy? NO.....just like everything else....its subject to the same rules.

I worked in a natural food store for five years and alot of their thinking rubbed off on me, so I know what you mean; too much of anything can be bad. Then again, too much is better than not enough....
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Offline Antigen

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« Reply #14 on: December 11, 2006, 05:39:40 PM »
Yeah, I've hugged my kids and both my dogs today. Would have taken the dogs out for a long hike too, but had to make a living instead. Food and living indoors are, after all, pretty important.

If I talk to my kids' dad about, say, school or entertainment choices or anything that regards the kids, he gets either drifty or irritated unless I join him in pretending that it's all good and cool and our mission in life should be to pound, hammer and mindfuck our precious daughters into conformity with all this bullshit. Right now, my kids are hangin w/ me and the dogs, it's a good day and I'll be ignoring all of you for the next couple of hours while we bake cookies together.

After that, though, I'll have some time to talk things over and I won't be looking for intelligent discourse on these issue with people who are to chicken shit to acknowledge what's going on.

Next year this time, I hope to have this party a good deal further out in the sticks.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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