Author Topic: what if it was even worse than we thought  (Read 11880 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline OKB4RMA

  • Posts: 60
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #15 on: February 22, 2006, 03:57:00 AM »
no...never been overseas...unless you are talking about the carribean where I actually have gone to de-stress at times...but by 6th sense...hard to describe...more than a heightened perception...kind of like singing a song in your head and then it comes on the radio...thinking that someone is going to call you...and then they do...stuff like that.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Withdraw

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 419
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #16 on: February 22, 2006, 05:57:00 AM »
[ This Message was edited by: Withdraw on 2006-02-28 23:32 ]
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #17 on: February 22, 2006, 07:17:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-02-22 02:57:00, Withdraw wrote:

"I believe we were ~chosen to be in Straight because of our unique abilities. I for one, would not have been thought of as rebelious if People understood then, Often I was going on ~gut instincts. Mainly at that time to weed out harmful authority figures. So by that.. I was seen as having a problem with authority. When infact.... I felt what they were doing/saying/teaching was wrong or against humanity as I understood it. So I refused to follow them, hence I was a wave maker, a problem... Bang, I'm in Straight which was designed to steal that part of me away.



Even my family says someday.. My ~speaking out for what is right will get me killed, maybe standing at a podium telling my truth. People expect me to die from standing up and speaking the truth as I see it. Because  Authority will see me as a threat to their ~way. I have always been this way. Always, even in Straight. What kind of world do people die for standing up for humanity? This kind, thats right! Happens everyday.



So, I honestly believe it is our ~make-up and how we respond to the world which put us in Straight anyhow. Straight was designed to cage us and destroy that which speaks out for the truth. Did the goverment plan it that way? Who knows, but I wouldn't be suprised. Do I still feel like I have an X on my back? Yep, sure do. Sometimes, I too wonder if we are still being ~studied. Maybe so. Do I believe there is a way to ~escape that if so? Newp, I sure don't. It could be much bigger than we are even imagining.. Matrix anyone?   :wink:  



St8suvivor- Some people attack others, not all. Some only attack back to defend themselves. There is alot more people posting here than anyone realizes..Anon and un-anon. Some are for fun, some are Not. I'm trying to learn to pick my battles here, because I too came here and was horrified at the seemingly un-unified bunch of people. But that is not always so, alot goes on behind the scenes, which most never see. People are ememies, and people are very close... just never know. I'm glad to see ya back too=) I've been taking mini breaks as well. We have to...I can say, I am STILL FREE though!



~Naked PeAcE to all :razz: "


Ok, so I am to believe that because I was barely a 12 year old who was drinking, smoking pot, doing cocaine and going from straight "A"'s in school to failing and constantly skipping school, that the government knew I was going to be trouble for them and found a way to put me in Straight?

Wow.

I'm one of the few who actually were helped to get back into life.  I was fucked up and needed some direction.  I was in for 14 months and got my shit together.  I did not see all the atrocities that were described here, but I do believe that they did happen.

So, what's my point?  There seems to be a lot of blame placed on Straight for some very common life situations (i.e. panic attacks, paranoia, etc.).  Maybe these are things that would have happened to us even without the Straight experience.  I believe dwelling on the blaming of Straight for all current problems may be convenient but counter-productive to healing.

Sorry to disagree with the consensus, but that's what I think.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #18 on: February 22, 2006, 07:36:00 AM »
Liars, lots of liars on this thread. People who are not actually Straight survivors/people who pretend they were Straight survivors but it is a known fact that they have an agenda here.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #19 on: February 22, 2006, 09:11:00 AM »
Yep. Lots of "ghost survivors" here in all the forums. They pop up once in while to throw up some vague program reference never to be heard from again. A 12 year old cokehead... it gets better everytime.  :lol:
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #20 on: February 22, 2006, 09:46:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-02-22 04:17:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote

On 2006-02-22 02:57:00, Withdraw wrote:


"I believe we were ~chosen to be in Straight because of our unique abilities. I for one, would not have been thought of as rebelious if People understood then, Often I was going on ~gut instincts. Mainly at that time to weed out harmful authority figures. So by that.. I was seen as having a problem with authority. When infact.... I felt what they were doing/saying/teaching was wrong or against humanity as I understood it. So I refused to follow them, hence I was a wave maker, a problem... Bang, I'm in Straight which was designed to steal that part of me away.





Even my family says someday.. My ~speaking out for what is right will get me killed, maybe standing at a podium telling my truth. People expect me to die from standing up and speaking the truth as I see it. Because  Authority will see me as a threat to their ~way. I have always been this way. Always, even in Straight. What kind of world do people die for standing up for humanity? This kind, thats right! Happens everyday.





So, I honestly believe it is our ~make-up and how we respond to the world which put us in Straight anyhow. Straight was designed to cage us and destroy that which speaks out for the truth. Did the goverment plan it that way? Who knows, but I wouldn't be suprised. Do I still feel like I have an X on my back? Yep, sure do. Sometimes, I too wonder if we are still being ~studied. Maybe so. Do I believe there is a way to ~escape that if so? Newp, I sure don't. It could be much bigger than we are even imagining.. Matrix anyone?   :wink:  





St8suvivor- Some people attack others, not all. Some only attack back to defend themselves. There is alot more people posting here than anyone realizes..Anon and un-anon. Some are for fun, some are Not. I'm trying to learn to pick my battles here, because I too came here and was horrified at the seemingly un-unified bunch of people. But that is not always so, alot goes on behind the scenes, which most never see. People are ememies, and people are very close... just never know. I'm glad to see ya back too=) I've been taking mini breaks as well. We have to...I can say, I am STILL FREE though!





~Naked PeAcE to all :razz: "




Ok, so I am to believe that because I was barely a 12 year old who was drinking, smoking pot, doing cocaine and going from straight "A"'s in school to failing and constantly skipping school, that the government knew I was going to be trouble for them and found a way to put me in Straight?



Wow.



I'm one of the few who actually were helped to get back into life.  I was fucked up and needed some direction.  I was in for 14 months and got my shit together.  I did not see all the atrocities that were described here, but I do believe that they did happen.



So, what's my point?  There seems to be a lot of blame placed on Straight for some very common life situations (i.e. panic attacks, paranoia, etc.).  Maybe these are things that would have happened to us even without the Straight experience.  I believe dwelling on the blaming of Straight for all current problems may be convenient but counter-productive to healing.



Sorry to disagree with the consensus, but that's what I think.

"


You ate a lot of beans.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Withdraw

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 419
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #21 on: February 22, 2006, 12:37:00 PM »
[ This Message was edited by: Withdraw on 2006-02-28 23:33 ]
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

dragonfly

  • Guest
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #22 on: February 22, 2006, 12:41:00 PM »
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Nonconformistlaw

  • Posts: 789
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • http://survivingstraightinc.com
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #23 on: February 22, 2006, 02:09:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-02-21 23:02:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:

"This is when the panic attacks started.  I could not function normally.  Any time someone asked me a question or engaged me in a conversation or I had to give a presentation, I felt like I was being ?confronted? (ala Straight), and had a severe panic attack."
I hear ya about panic attacks (I've had many since my early 20's)....I know for me they are connected to the extreme stress of being conftronted in Str8 all the time like you said.....I just spent half of yesterday trying to regain control of my breating to fend off a panic attack....it was a stressful day at work yesterday, partially becuase I was fearful of getting in trouble for missing a deadline (I made it, but its that fear of confrontation thing in the mix...I just figured out the connection)
 
Quote
"We (Straight Survivors) are the fallout of this (well funded) experiment.  While Maia Szalavitz?s book does a good job of accurately documenting the atrocities that occurred when we were imprisoned there, the story of the aftermath is still left to be told.

PTSD is real. But the problem is that most professionals equipped to deal with PTSD and the like are focused on sexual abuse. While this type of abuse is very significant and sincerely worthy of treatment, I assert that there are not sufficient professional resources familiar with or equipped to treat the significant psychological aftermath of the many, many, casualties of the so called ?War on Drugs?.

Yeah I agree with you here. PTSD in the context of the traumatic "treatment" kids are subject to needs to be explored and in the media spotlight if you ask me....In fact...I'm working on that right now...getting it out there I mean. check this out!
http://www.cincinnatibeacon.com/index.p ... _survivor/
http://www.cincinnatibeacon.com/index.p ... s_milford/
http://www.cincinnatibeacon.com/index.p ... stigation/
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
quot;In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.\" George Orwell

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #24 on: February 22, 2006, 02:09:00 PM »
Hearsay is good enough for me.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Nonconformistlaw

  • Posts: 789
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • http://survivingstraightinc.com
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #25 on: February 22, 2006, 02:19:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-02-22 02:57:00, Withdraw wrote:

"I believe we were ~chosen to be in Straight because of our unique abilities. I for one, would not have been thought of as rebelious if People understood then, Often I was going on ~gut instincts. Mainly at that time to weed out harmful authority figures. So by that.. I was seen as having a problem with authority. When infact.... I felt what they were doing/saying/teaching was wrong or against humanity as I understood it. So I refused to follow them, hence I was a wave maker, a problem... Bang, I'm in Straight which was designed to steal that part of me away.

Even my family says someday.. My ~speaking out for what is right will get me killed, maybe standing at a podium telling my truth. People expect me to die from standing up and speaking the truth as I see it. Because  Authority will see me as a threat to their ~way. I have always been this way. Always, even in Straight. What kind of world do people die for standing up for humanity? This kind, thats right! Happens everyday."

Ya I have that 6th sense too..I was percieved as disobedient and defiant because of this...but I just knew what was bullshit and therefore I knew when something/someone shouldnt be obeyed.

About speaking out, yeah I wonder that about myself...but so be it...I guess my signature explains it all.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
quot;In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.\" George Orwell

Offline Nonconformistlaw

  • Posts: 789
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • http://survivingstraightinc.com
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #26 on: February 22, 2006, 02:28:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-02-22 04:17:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
Quote
So, what's my point?  There seems to be a lot of blame placed on Straight for some very common life situations (i.e. panic attacks, paranoia, etc.).  Maybe these are things that would have happened to us even without the Straight experience.  I believe dwelling on the blaming of Straight for all current problems may be convenient but counter-productive to healing.

Sorry to disagree with the consensus, but that's what I think."

 :roll:  :roll:  :roll:  :roll:  :roll: Not this line of bullshit again....

Umm...I suggest you educate your self about trauma induced panic attacks/anxiety disorders and childhood trauma induced PTSD.....both are SERIOUS ailments. Chronic panic attacks and/or PTSD is NOT a common life situation. Neither disorder remotely has a thing to do with dwelling in any shape or form. And trying to come to terms with the past is not dwelling!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
quot;In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.\" George Orwell

Offline Nonconformistlaw

  • Posts: 789
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
    • http://survivingstraightinc.com
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #27 on: February 22, 2006, 02:30:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-02-22 04:17:00, Anonymous wrote:
"So, what's my point?  There seems to be a lot of blame placed on Straight for some very common life situations (i.e. panic attacks, paranoia, etc.).  Maybe these are things that would have happened to us even without the Straight experience.  I believe dwelling on the blaming of Straight for all current problems may be convenient but counter-productive to healing.

Sorry to disagree with the consensus, but that's what I think."

 :roll:  :roll:  :roll:  :roll:  :roll: Not this line of bullshit again....

Umm...I suggest you educate your self about trauma induced panic attacks/anxiety disorders and childhood trauma induced PTSD.....both are SERIOUS ailments. Chronic panic attacks and/or PTSD is NOT a common life situation. Neither disorder remotely has a thing to do with dwelling in any shape or form. And trying to come to terms with the past is NOT dwelling!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
quot;In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.\" George Orwell

Offline Anonymous

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 164653
  • Karma: +3/-4
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #28 on: February 23, 2006, 07:26:00 AM »
I believe this thread started out with someone talking about tripping.  You don't think that could be related to paranoia and panic attacks?  You should educate yourself on the long-term effects of these type of behaviors.

I am not saying that people don't have PTSD from Straight.  What I'm saying is maybe they should search a little more and see if there aren't still behaviors that are causing those effects currently instead of blaming it all on the past.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline RTP2003

  • Posts: 1345
  • Karma: +0/-0
    • View Profile
what if it was even worse than we thought
« Reply #29 on: February 23, 2006, 08:13:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-02-21 23:02:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:

"OK. Listen up playaaas.  This is 4 real.



I initially backed away from this forum for a while for a couple of reasons. But this particular post struck a cord with me that I believe deserves further discussion/exploration.

First, though, the couple of reasons that I, as a Straight Survivor, became reluctant to share further posts on this forum:



1)   The initial group of people who had shown me support when I first discovered this forum has somehow transformed into a different group of (primarily ?anonymous?) people who were more interested in insulting one another, rather than advocating the support and camaraderie that I had initially experienced when first posting to this forum when I first ?Woke Up? last year.  It had seemingly degraded into a group of persons whose answer to the healing we seek was to ?smoke more pot? rather than discuss/share the problems which, in truth, could only be addressed by an understanding of the facts to form the basis for the beginning to a resolution to the ordeal that we had been through and that others are, to this day continuing to endure?.

I think you are painting with a rather broad brush here.  Granted, there are plenty of kooks and downright assholes here, but there can also be useful insights and perspectives to be gained, it just requires a bit of sifting to get to.  A bit of caution as to who to trust is also in order, as many of those kooks and assholes seem to enjoy playing "group", or maybe that is the only way they know how to interact with others.

As far as the advice to "smoke more pot", I certainly advocate it, but not as a mere "alcohol substitute".  Marijuana is one of the best medications for the treatment of PTSD, and it's use also has the benefit of helping to "short-circuit" Straight programming because to use it is to violate the entire foundation of Straight's fucked up philosophy.  While much of the pro-marijuana banter can seem childish, or downright stupid at times, if you can "snort between the lines", so to speak, you will find that many survivors of Straight, Inc. use it as a medicinal tool to help them cope with the experience.   I don't think you are being snobbish or hypocritical in the slightest in regards to your comments about marijuana vs. alcohol, I think you may be a little mistaken about your belief that smoking marijuana has no benefits for Straight victims and survivors.  Discussing the facts and gaining an understanding  of the ordeal is of great importance, I agree, but the use of marijuana for coping with PTSD is a very valuable tool.  To simply dismiss it as "druggie bullshit" is to fall prey to more of Straight's programming and conditioning, I recommend the use of marijuana for Straight survivors not only for it's inherent medicinal qualities, but also as a means of defying Straight, Inc.'s programming, and doing so on a conscious level---NOT from some notion of "powerless inevitability", but as a means of asserting one's separation from Straight's indoctrination.


Quote

2)   When I have posted political type of comments that allude to the bigger picture of what we have been through with Str8, I am inundated with feedback that my posts are irrelevant and have no place on this forum.  I have become discouraged by this, and would have liked to have thought that more of those on this forum would see this connection and be inclined to look into it and see the FACTS for what they really are

Again, this is where the sifting through shit becomes important.  There are some really deranged people on these forums, and often their paranoia gets in the way of useful, meaningful discussion and conversation.  However, "just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not after you."  A lot of interesting theories as to the extent of Straight's influence and purpose have been thrown around, many of which seem to be well-grounded in fact, not merely figments of paranoid imaginations.



Quote

FACT:  Straight was the continuation of a government experiment on behavior modification techniques.  The ?rehabilitation? of ?troubled teens? was the perfect alibi for the furtherance/funding of these studies.  Good for funding, good for politics, good for votes, good for gov?t research.  Period.



We (Straight Survivors) are the fallout of this (well funded) experiment.  While Maia Szalavitz?s book does a good job of accurately documenting the atrocities that occurred when we were imprisoned there, the story of the aftermath is still left to be told.





I agree that only half of the story is beginning to be told, the aftermath of Straight, and the psychological, emotional, and all-too-often physical damage lingers in many of us, long after the abuse factory shut down.  Too many times I have seen the destructive effects of Straight, many, many years after the last MI was written or the last rules rap attended.   Abusive situations such as the one we were in leave various traumas and suffering for numerous reasons in addition to the day-to-day mental (and physical) tortures.  The fact that we were told it was "therapeutic" has caused many of us to have a distrust of anything remotely resembling mental health treatment, and since most of us were placed their by our parents, and many betrayed by siblings during the ordeal, relationships and issues of misplaced or ill-placed trust often occur.   Add thias to the constant belittling of and assault on our sense of self-worth, and it's pretty amazing that we have survived at all.  Many did not.   That speaks volumes in and of itself.  Straight was an all-too-real quack "therapy" for an imaginary "disease", the "cure" being far worse than the "illness" ever could have been, sort of like cutting off a hand to get rid of a hangnail.  

I think you have hit the nail on the head with these observations, and I hope you will continue to contribute to the forum with your insights and perspectives on the ordeal that was/is Straight, Inc.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
RTP2003 fought in defense of the Old Republic