DISCLAIMER: This post deals with a normal bodily function, but uses some vulgar slang expressions to make certain points. If you feel you may be offended by such language, it is advised that you skip this one. The humor-impaired may run into problems here as well.
On 2005-09-25 19:14:00, ChrisL wrote:
"You don't have to be a Shit expert to know what Shit smells like, so to speak...."
True, true...butt it takes a discerning nose to recognise 'good shit' from 'bad shit', even though sometimes the expression, 'good shit' is nearly synonomous with 'bad shit'. What's almost as funny as hell to me is that you hear people talk about 'bad ass shit' in a positive context, usually referring to dope, yet we hardly ever hear the expression 'good ass shit' except, perhaps, during the course of a conversation about Preparation H or a similar product. An exception to the above would be when an illicit drug user happens across some really 'good shit', they may be more inclined to show their 'ass' shortly after burning, snorting, or injecting it. If you have a good ass, it is generally best left alone, but not unguarded.
Ironically, one would likely not use such a product as Preparation H unless they had a 'bad ass', and this condition may exist with or without the presence of shit. This is where the expression 'no shit' comes into play. 'No shit' to a dope fiend is generally considered to be bad ass news, whereas the same circumstance presented to a non-dope user is neither good or bad news, because they have no cause to give a shit.
No shit to someone who suffers from constipation, however, is not a welcome outcome, and can, over time, make the sufferer feel like shit. Often, upon observing someone in this condition, a well-intentioned friend or aquantance may offer the suggestion that the sufferer may be constipated. The usual sufferer response can range from the relatively mild, 'no shit' to a more extreme, and harsh retort such as 'no shirt, shitlock!!!' however, in cases where the sufferer is severely uncomfortable, he or she may, with no verbal warning, proceed to beat shit out of the well meaning friend or aquantance. It is best, therefore, to perhaps be supportive, but not say shit. In some populations, the expression 'good ass shit' (noun) is shortened to 'good shit', which can easily be mistaken for the expected result of ingesting a laxative, which often results in the verb form of 'good shit'
Another illustration, which may help to bring clarity to points made above would be this hypothetical situation:
If you were to ask two different people if they 'have anything for a headache', Person One might offer Tylenol or a similar product, whereas Person Two, having been asked the identical question, using the same inflection, could very well produce a sledge hammer, and/or a screaming child. A safer question, then, would be 'do you have anything to
relieve a headache'
Another observation:
Often, out of a sense of false pride, a 'bad ass'
with a 'bad ass' will opt to forego the afore mentioned Preparation H and Tylenol treatments, and pretend they are not uncomfortable. I am usually not comfortable in the company of this personality type.
Further more, and in conclusion,
dope, smack, crack, acid, weed, good/bad shit, stoned, wired :em: , crash, f'd up, wasted, strung out, busted, withdrawls, eight balls, shoot up, drive-by, waste, toast, toasted, horse, (any equestrians?)....
Boy, do I miss the good old days!
_________________
later, Thom
I think I know where I got off track! I thought the 11th step said 'Sought through beer and medication to remove our conscious contact w/ God...I plead lysdexia!
