I went to RMA back in 1984, with Geoff who posted above. We have indeed been the closest of friends for more than 20 years now and ironically, without RMA, that would not have been the case.
Susan was my girlfriend there, and we stayed, or rather got back together after she was yanked out by her father after we had a sex contract together. The relationship lasted for several years and I will always be grateful I got to know her.
Yes, RMA had some good students, many of whom became good friends. Shared experiences, even shared trauma do that to people. They grow closer together.
I think the three of us were lucky in that we stuck together, trying to keep a firm grasp on reality, which RMA worked so hard to destroy and reform in their horrid vision.
That nightmare of a place was marketed to wealthy families who had neither the time nor the ability, perhaps even lacking the desire, to keep working with their kids, as a place to make them better again.
The problem I saw, was that the program was one-size-fits-all, and many of us were not that messed up to begin with.
I was sent to RMA because I did not complete homework. I doubt any student who was there with me would claim I was not intelligent or well educated, so I wasn't doing schoolwork for reasons that had nothing to do with capability.
But here I was, surrounding by kids who had real problems. Drugs, alcohol, sexual experiences so bizarre I get sick recalling listening to them repeated at the beginning of every propheet.
My parents had intended to use RMA as a way of disowning me after my 18th birthday, so I was sent there for all the wrong reasons. On graduation day I was told I was never coming home. Which messed me up enough I really needed counciling then.
Parents have no clue what their kids are really doing at that school. When they come on the occassional visits, they see their kid performing. Doing various activities, all of which appear wholesome, running, playing, spending time with others in meaningful relationship, and they figure their kid is really in a magical place that is truly going to make they better again.
But they don't see the raps. The constant tearing down of each student's mental barriers. The humiliation tactics, peer pressure, sleep deprivation, bans, and so many other emotional and mental attacks that leave their child unable to cope with real life after RMA.
For me, after graduation, I was in a haze. I was flown back to California and saw more people in the first five minutes at San Francisco airport than I had seen in the 2 years in Idaho. Culture shock was the least of my worries however.
I had no money, no skills, and no way to survive in the most expensive state in the union, without parental support and traumatized by my time in Idaho.
I have spent the better part of 20 years trying to rebuild my life, rebuilding my family relationships and failing miserably. It was all a waste. The Academy, the efforts to try to get my family to see I was not some evil teenager and never was, and to someday be proud of myself and have my family proud of me.
I have attempted suicide 3 times since graduating. I should say I committed suicide, but when you fail, they say you just tried. I hung myself and the rope broke. Twice. Odds of that are billions to one. RMA gave me nothing but a few close friends and took away my family, my sense of self, my sense of purpose and my control over my emotions. The staff there had no training and should not have been allowed to work with the minds of young kids, using the dangerous techniques they employed.
From everything I have heard, the schools that spawned from CEDU and RMA were no better and continued the traditions of illegal practices, sex and drugs that were prevailent at RMA. That they are shutting down is a good thing. I think every cent they charged to every parent who sent a kid there should be returned, with appologies.
What started out so many years ago as a place to help troubled young teens turned into a hellish nightmare for far too many. I think it is evident that even 20 years later, people are still reliving the trauma and having so much trouble succeeding in their lives. It pains me to know that those of you have have left so recently may still have endless years of emotional pain ahead of you. And I don't know what I can offer you that would help.
I still manage to pick myself up every day and keep going, and every day it does get a little easier. But the memories and the horror never fade. And I still want my family back!
Good luck to you all,
William Henry, class of 1986
