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Messages - stina

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241
CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / blownawaytheidahoway
« on: November 02, 2007, 06:10:06 PM »
Tell him to call me up. I'll tell him the good AND the bad from what I remember.

I'm sorry that it's created a rift in your family. Something similar happened with my family, and it became a source of misused power, this witholding of information and communication. I was only partly joking about telling him to call me, I think anyone of us would help if there was a way that we could. The offer's out there.

242
CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / CEDU should make amends
« on: November 02, 2007, 05:23:27 PM »
I used to go aggressive...my first few weeks there I would challenge and react, eventually it just became finding the path of least resistance. I even made shit up once or twice just so it would be over quicker. It got to the point where there was nowhere left to retreat, those black plastic chairs didn't provide much in the way of a cave. Plus, a heated exchange with one person and a heated exchange with a bunch of people who've moved across the circle to join said heated exchange are completely different animals.

I guess that just shows that people cope and adjust in different ways.

243
CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / CEDU should make amends
« on: November 02, 2007, 03:46:45 PM »
Quote from: ""dishdutyfugitive""
Recently it's become very clear to me that 1 of the harmful ways CEDU 'therapy' fucked me up is by forcing us to internalize everything. This instills the "concept of being broken and needing to be fixed" (every M/W/F). I look back over the last 20 years and realize that I approach most (interpersonal conflict) situations in the following manner: "I immediately assume I'm at fault for whatever is wrong and it's my responsibility to fix it".


God I hear this in a big way. Talk about a mindfuck. I have a hard time, not standing up for myself necessarily, but calling people out when I know I'm right...it's like there's small nagging voice in my head telling me to just suck it up and deal, that it'll get turned back around somehow. Now the untrained eye may not see this, and neither did I until I started checking out these forums and paying attention, but does that not perfectly encapsulate a rap?

Your first instinct is to fight for what you know is right, but that eventually gets replaced by the instinct to just get through it with the least amount of conflict possible. Damn.

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