Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

I had the drive, I wanted to get out and away from where my family was. I was lucky enough that school just wasn't that hard -until calculus-ugh! I was so intense after straight that I attacked every task with some kind of weird vengance. In hindsight, I think I just wanted to prove everybody wrong and show 'em all that I could be successful, that I did amount to something. I was lucky enough to have access to college. I love to build things. Especially machines, and picked a career where I could be part of building really big stuff.

There have been many, plenty of times where I just did whatever I had to do to get by. One day at a time. Especially as a single parent. Having a kid made it imperative that I finish school so I could provide for my own. Made it imperative that I find a good job. Having losers for husbands 1&2 made it imperative that I be totally self-sufficient. Natural interest, farm work and crappy cars taught me mechanics. I could/can always find something to do.

Once I had the good job, I did the best I could. Damn 5th phase eagle eye serves well finding a faulty weld in a smoky flashlight beam. Or a rotten bulkhead, or bad wiring, or a sweaty welder with a back pocket full of rods working on a hull seam. My boats have never fallen apart or caught fire or taken on water due to poor workmanship at construction or repair. I can't help it when idiot Boudreaux pulls the flukes on the stern anchor up through the transom!

The point is, without drive and desire, the opportunity means nothing. Having drive and desire, creates opportunities or improves upon others.

My desire to surpass the expectations of my relatives has caused me to fight for achievement. I made it in a tough field, I'm the first woman to hold my position in the company history of 150yrs. I feel satisfied. I drive an old car, nothing shiny, piglet in the shed (iron head sporty), have a junky yard and am content with that. Short of catastrophe, I have the ability to give my kids access to college like I had. I hope I can pass on a desire to them to reach for their goals and let nothing deter them from achieving their dreams. After all, that is the point.

Trish





"Who thinks progress in an individual comes from a government program or "opportunity"?
Who thinks opportunities are made by individual drive?
What seperates the engineers, doctors, RNs, lawyers and web designers among us from those who are bitter? Some lament the "system" being against them, where others thrive under the same system.
How are you doing?
I wonder if the achievements of straightlings is higher, lower or equal to societies norm. "

I can't stand to have people checking up on me, where I am, what I'm doing.  I get especially annoyed when a particular co-worker looks into my office every time he walks by my door, which I could, but don't close out of courtesy to others.

I can not tolerate anybody invading my personal space. And do not yell in my face. I will immediately go to attack mode.  I haven't learned how to deal with that, yet. Others, have learned to never yell in my face or poke me in the chest.

Living and working in the bayou country in the male dominated field of shipbuilding is a continuous challenge.  These good ol' boys -direct cajun descent are blue-gummers- think a woman's place is barefoot and pregnant. They are the one's that commit the fatal error of yelling and poking - that being the accepted way among the rougher yard hands, quality (ha!) control guys, welders...not all, but a few bad apples.

I heard fn bitch so many times behind my back, I had a name tag made for my coverall F.N. BICH.  That got a few laughs.  The first few years were tough...Now it's only the new ones that got somethin' to prove or a problem with taking direction from women.

I'm trying to curb the attack mode, it's damn difficult, 'cause the response is instant. Can't always engage cerebral functions with that much adrenalin flowing. Staring at me gets the same attack response. If a glare from me doesn't work, I get more direct. I can actually feel the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Fuzz up just like a damn cat. Probably have a heart attack early because of this shit. Damn.

Well, I'm aware of it at least, and that's a start. Implementation I guess, will be just like my banjo playing, if I want to get better, I have to practice, practice, practice.
Trish

I'm glad you got that off your chest, too.  You'll be happy(NOT)to know that Becky is still practicing her program daily and inflicting it on unfortunate others, including her (surprisingly very sweet) little kid, my nephew.  She married a cop (a special kind of asshole for sure) and they are perfect for each other. I divorced her from the rest of the family years ago after some especially nasty assorted bullshit from her and her asshole cop.  According to her, she is perfect and all the rest of us are trash.  

The older sister Trish aka trishtrash

Well, I could've lived another year without remembering that! I did a bunch of speaking engagements. I have to agree, I feel like a freak and a fraud.  What's worse- they actually got me to do it on TV. Eye on Washington. Some other girl couldn't make it and it fell to me. Talk about cringing in shame. Shit, I hope that archive has been BURNED!  I was on 5th phase so many times it totalled over half of my program. I believe a junior staffer always drove me.

You know, sitting here thinking about Straight sure makes my Popeye's fried chicken seem like a banquet!
Trish

Yeah, well that's the problem. Didn't even realize I was doing it. The boss told me the other day that I'm not courteous enough when I deal with clients. That's what got me thinking about all this crap again. I followed the links so thoughtfully posted by enough. Juicy material, take a while to digest. I'm tired of being dogged for years by the skeletons and trash in my mental closets. Two bad marriages, social problems, yeah, I really learned to fit in. Aggression is not a totally bad thing for a girl in my male dominated field of work, but geez, not to my extreme. One of my Surveyors told my my name was on the wall in the shipyard head with : For a hard time call Trish with my office phone number. That pretty well sums it up I think.

thankyou
Trish