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Messages - Fr. Cassian

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136
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / A Beautiful Vision
« on: February 09, 2005, 05:14:00 PM »
Quote
On 2005-02-09 13:59:00, Idreamofnewtonsburning wrote:

"Virgil and Ruthie getting run over by a dump truck full of dead cops...... :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:
"


How typically druggie of you, fantasizing about the deaths of the two people on Earth who cared the most about you.  Such druggie ingratitude is evidence that you need to spend some time in a blue chair, thinking about how you can make amends for your craven druggie behavior. Have a seat.

137
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Bob The Penis Birder
« on: February 09, 2005, 05:11:00 PM »
Quote
On 2005-02-09 13:53:00, Anonymous wrote:

"What is a penis birder?"


It's just another manifestation of the sickness of chemical dependency.  Penis Birders Anonymous is most likely dead, insane, or in jail, the inevitable result of failing to apply the Tools of Personal Change that were so generously made available to him during his time at Straight, Inc.

Penis Birding, sexual promiscuity, homosexuality, and other unnatural affections are common symptoms of the disease of the feelings that you druggies have chosen to embrace by your continued use of drugs.  The only hope for you is to enroll yourselves right away in the new, improved, all-ages, faith-based Straight, Inc.-by-the-Sea (formerly Straight, Inc. v2.0).  Only there will you receive the Tough Love that will save you from the depravity of your druggie will.

138
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Bring Gay at Straight
« on: January 30, 2005, 07:11:00 PM »
Homosexuality is not only a sin, druggies, it is also one of thye chief manifestations of chemical dependency.  Studies show that 87% of homosexuals engaged in their first heinous act of depravity within twenty minutes of smoking their frist joint, and other research indicates that 92% of druggies become homosexual after using drugs for more than two years.  LSD makes you homosexual instantly (if male), as does Ecstasy (if female).

The only way to save yourselves from the mortal sin of homosexuality is to check yourself in to the new, improved, all-ages, faith-based, Straight, Inc.-by-the Sea (formerly Straight, Inc. v2.0) as soon as possible!

 See you on front row, faggot!

139
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / "The Death Of Ritchie"/Robbie Benson
« on: January 30, 2005, 06:55:00 PM »
Yes, the death of Ritchie was unfortunate, indeed.  It is quite understandable why his father shot him.  What else was he supposed to do?  He wasn't working the Steps, so actually, his father was showing him compassion by killing him---that way, he did not have to suffer the agony of teen drug use.

140
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / We are not alone!
« on: January 26, 2005, 09:28:00 PM »
Listen Druggies,

The reason the aliens are coming here is because they are bringing a saucerful of alien druggie kids and dropping them off at the best damn drug treatment center in the universe--That's right Druggie, the new, improved, all-ages (and soon all-species!) Straight, Inc. v2.0! Whether it's huffing carbona or shooting smack, snorting Centaurian rocket fuel or smoking Martian sensimilla, the disease of teenage drug use is not limited to our world. The aliens have wisely decided to bring their druggie alien kids to have them go through their phases at the Area 51 branch of Straight, Inc. v2.0. If you little druggie cretins don't shape up and get this Group in line, I'm sending the worst of you off to the new Proxima Centauri branch when it opens. Try going on a permission to the beach while you're wearing a spacesuit and on a world with six times Earth's gravity. You damned druggie ingrates don't know how good you've got it. Love ya! Have a seat......

141
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Quit Bothering Me!
« on: January 22, 2005, 02:06:00 PM »
Quote
On 2005-01-22 09:20:00, The Alterboy wrote:

"News Flash! Fr. Cassian didn't "screw up" with you! He's a great man blessed with God's discernment. You people are all just jealous because he picked me not you. [ This Message was edited by: The Alterboy on 2005-01-22 09:21 ]"


Thank you for your kind words, my boy!  I've got some special blessings for you in the near future.  Just remember, "my rod and my Staff they comfort thee".  I'll have some more Holy Annointing Oil for you this evening after Mass.

Neither in my private life nor in my writings, have I ever made a secret of being an out-and-out unbeliever.
--Sigmund Freud, Austrian-born psychologist


142
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Miller Newton's "Church"
« on: January 22, 2005, 01:58:00 PM »
Yes, I do continue to treat chemical dependency---it's part of my calling from the Lord, just as he chose me to lead you druggie cretins out of the Valley of the Shadow of Drugs back in the 80s and 90s.  You slime-filled druggie imbeciles had better not interfere with anyone else's program, or you will have the guilt on your hands ( I would have said conscience, but I know you druggies don't have one, or if you do, it has been incapacitated by your continued use of DRUGS) when the poor unfortunate relapses.  This is serious business--just as I saved you from dying when you were brought into an intake room for the first time, I am continuing to help those that have been afflicted with the scourge of chemical dependency.  Why you druggies choose to condemn someone to the life of depravity that you choose to lead is no mystery--- it is merely jealousy over the fact that I spend my time helping them and not you.

Emotions rule the world; Is it any wonder that it's so mucked up?!
http://fornits.com/rates.htm' target='_new'>Bill Warbis


143
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Quit Bothering Me!
« on: January 20, 2005, 09:48:00 PM »
Quote
On 2005-01-19 10:52:00, Melsemblerspenispump wrote:

"You have to admit Miller, it was a blast abusing the little druggie fucks and to make money doing it. You were so good at it thats why I admire you. Hell thats why I admire me :lol: "


Hell yes it was!  I can't wait to sodomize some more kids at my new "faith-based", federally funded adolescent drug treatment center!  With four more years of George, we'll be able to torture kids for fun and rake in tax $$$$$$$ for profit!  Love Ya!!

I give money for church organs in the hope the organ music will distract the congregation's attention from the rest of the service.
--Andrew Carnegie, Scottish-born American industrialist and philanthropist


144
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Quit Bothering Me!
« on: January 19, 2005, 11:49:00 AM »
Quote
On 2005-01-19 08:44:00, thepatriot wrote:


The Clergy what a great place for a child abuser to hide :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  Raped any alter boys lately father :lol:  :lol:
"


Druggie, your vile slander will get you nothing but trouble.  Already I have had to restrain some of the more zealous members of my flock from ripping you asunder for the drug-crazed buffoonery that you and your kind have been perpetrating.  I may not be able to prevent them from acting upon their righteous anger, so you continue these foolish antics at your own risk.

145
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Who Made The Newton Flier?
« on: January 19, 2005, 11:36:00 AM »
By spreading this nonsense, you are merely putting your depravity and disease on display for all to see.  You can't even get the spelling correct.  Truly an example of what becomes of those who do not  follow the Steps that I so graciously made available to you.  Any more crap like this and you druggies will hear from my attorney, if the legions of loyal Straightlings don't get you first.  I've had to counsel them to leave you alone, but I can only hold them back for so long.  They will most likely take it upon themselves to rend you apart in righteous indignation if this sort of slander continues, and I will be unable to stop them.  For your own good, please cease.

146
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Quit Bothering Me!
« on: January 19, 2005, 11:23:00 AM »
Quote
On 2005-01-19 08:20:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Tough problems call for tough love.  I was merely using appropriate measures to deal with the insidious disease of teenage drug-use.  Apparently I was not tough enough with some of you, as is indicated by the truly loathsome manner in which your disease has progressed.  I was doing what any righteous, caring, God-fearing individual would have done in that situation, and many successful graduates have expressed their sincere gratitude for my selfless benevolence.  Do you think I enjoyed the measures that you druggies forced me to go to?  Of course not!  I was doing what was appropriate for the situation, and many of your lives were saved by my actions.  Any unpleasant consequences of your chemical dependency are your own fault for following your druggie will and choosing to ignore the loving compassion and kindness that I graciously bestowed upon you.  You are, and were, undeserving druggie ingrates, but in my generosity, I tried to help you, and you continue to wallow in the filth of your depravity."


That was me, druggies.  You cretins have me so worked up right now I can hardly remember to sign in to this forum of filth.

147
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Quit Bothering Me!
« on: January 19, 2005, 11:04:00 AM »
Why don't you guys get a life?  I'm trying to spend my remaining years in quiet contemplation, leading a life of pious religious sanctity, and you druggie ingrates think it's OK to harass my neighbors and me.  You are truly sick, and your antics prove that the diagnoses I made during your adolescence were, in fact, correct.  You have a serious "disease of the feelings" that has continued to progress since you abandoned the loving, caring treatment that was so graciously offered to you in the many fine programs with which I was associated.  God bless Mel and Betty Sembler, even though they're Jews, they did the Christian thing by helping to fund the treatment centers that helped some of you, but, unfortunately, not all of you. Your druggie will has left you incapable of rational thought or moral decency, and I truly pity you.  Should you wish to "turn your will and your life over to the care of God", I can be found at my church nearly every day.  I invite you to confess your sins, and humbly beg my forgiveness for the terrible transgressions you have done against me, my church, my family, and my community.  Love ya!

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