Fornits

Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => The Troubled Teen Industry => Topic started by: Anonymous on November 05, 2006, 11:19:12 PM

Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 05, 2006, 11:19:12 PM
Okay, this one's busting me inside.

I'm a mod of a forum I most certainly will not name on Fornits (and I most certainly don't use the name Milk Gargling Death Penalty there!), one where the primary subject is of interest to teenagers and pre-teens. Kids post there, kids I don't know the backgrounds of.

One part of me is saying "Jesus fuck, what if one of them really IS in danger of being sent away and I DIDN'T warn him?" and the other is saying "Cripes, asshole, if they really were they probably wouldn't be posting there, they're just kids and this shit will give them nightmares. Don't post it, they shouldn't even have to think about this!"

Which attitude is correct?
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 06, 2006, 01:26:36 AM
I always new it was you, Lon.
Title: Re: To tell kids or not?
Post by: psy on November 06, 2006, 02:04:10 AM
Quote from: ""Milk Gargling Death Penal""
Okay, this one's busting me inside.

I'm a mod of a forum I most certainly will not name on Fornits (and I most certainly don't use the name Milk Gargling Death Penalty there!), one where the primary subject is of interest to teenagers and pre-teens. Kids post there, kids I don't know the backgrounds of.

One part of me is saying "Jesus fuck, what if one of them really IS in danger of being sent away and I DIDN'T warn him?" and the other is saying "Cripes, asshole, if they really were they probably wouldn't be posting there, they're just kids and this shit will give them nightmares. Don't post it, they shouldn't even have to think about this!"

Which attitude is correct?



I say tell them.  Even if they not at risk of being sent to program they might know somebody who is, or has been sent.  You never know where the information could go and where if could help.  Kids aren't as easy to scare as they used to be.  I wouldn't worry much about that.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 06, 2006, 09:00:47 AM
what would be the point of telling them?  most already know they could be sent somewhere for something - jail, psych hosp, or maybe "program".  some will never care.  some can't think it would ever happen to them.

then too, what would you tell them?  wouldn't you really be sort of shooting in the dark?  perhaps you could stir up something, or you could destroy your credibility or role as "moderator" by becoming a biased participant.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 06, 2006, 10:53:43 AM
dont warn kids warn the parents.. they are the ignorant ones.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 06, 2006, 10:56:28 AM
Are you an adult? If so, why do you interact on teen forums?
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Troll Control on November 06, 2006, 12:29:50 PM
I'd make a general statement and link them to this board.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: White Cracker Man on November 06, 2006, 01:59:00 PM
I would tell them. The potential positives far outweigh the potential positives.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Deborah on November 06, 2006, 02:22:40 PM
Would you avoid telling them about STDs, because it might scare them? It may give them motivation to 'act' appropriately around their parents, which could prevent a few placements.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: BSarro on November 06, 2006, 02:46:30 PM
Parents have enough problems without idiotic fools like Deborah and Milk Gargling Death Penalty intruding in thier and their children's lives.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: survivor122770 on November 06, 2006, 05:54:23 PM
Quote from: ""Guest""
Are you an adult? If so, why do you interact on teen forums?


he is a moderator. why dont you read the whole post.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: survivor122770 on November 06, 2006, 05:56:19 PM
Quote from: ""Deborah""
Would you avoid telling them about STDs, because it might scare them? It may give them motivation to 'act' appropriately around their parents, which could prevent a few placements.


good point deborah. i am glad there were at least a couple of mature replies.
Title: Re: To tell kids or not?
Post by: survivor122770 on November 06, 2006, 06:14:23 PM
Quote from: ""Milk Gargling Death Penal""
Okay, this one's busting me inside.

I'm a mod of a forum I most certainly will not name on Fornits (and I most certainly don't use the name Milk Gargling Death Penalty there!), one where the primary subject is of interest to teenagers and pre-teens. Kids post there, kids I don't know the backgrounds of.

One part of me is saying "Jesus fuck, what if one of them really IS in danger of being sent away and I DIDN'T warn him?" and the other is saying "Cripes, asshole, if they really were they probably wouldn't be posting there, they're just kids and this shit will give them nightmares. Don't post it, they shouldn't even have to think about this!"

Which attitude is correct?


milk, do you have the option to post as a guest? if so you could just post a link to fornits and let them figure it out for themselves. it may scare some of them or give them nightmares but it would be nothing compared to the nightmare of being sent to one of these places. maybe if they checked fornits out and it scared them bad enough some of them that are on the wrong path in life would take another look at how they are living their life, or the decisions they are making. most kids who participate on forums are in the higher iq percentile. i personally think that if we adults treated kids a little more maturely that they would respond more maturely. i think that we as adults shield children way to much these days. they are exposed to far worse in school and even on the nightly news than anything here on fornits. anyway just my opinion, i am sure bsarro will now put me on the list of idiotic fools, but i dont care he is on mine.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 06, 2006, 08:54:00 PM
I'm almost always of the opinion that sheltering children is stupid and a bad idea, but Fornits is one of the few exceptions. The things discussed here- propheets, raps, OP, long-term incarceration, and every word of it reality- are enough to make even me think twice.

Yeah, I chose to tell them.

Quote
maybe if they checked fornits out and it scared them bad enough some of them that are on the wrong path in life would take another look at how they are living their life


It might, but that's because the kids don't know that whatever they may or may not actually be doing has surprisingly little to do with whether they get sent away.
Title: add me too
Post by: psy on November 06, 2006, 10:45:12 PM
Quote from: ""BSarro""
Parents have enough problems without idiotic fools like Deborah and Milk Gargling Death Penalty intruding in thier and their children's lives.



You can add me to that list of idiotic fools too.  Better a fool than an ed-con.  Go back to hell Lon.  Hey that rhymes.  Maybe i should make a song.
Title: The parents could go too
Post by: Covergaard on November 07, 2006, 02:48:51 AM
Family Brat camp from twentytwenty production has just finished a series, where the parents went along with their child.

It worked good for two of the four.

It might have worked for three out of the four, but the mom could not face reality and discomfort in the desert, so she took the family out even when her boy seemed to improved. She just would not solve the problem.

I can understand why some parents outsource the whole thing to a strange company. It is hard to work with one self and those issues we all have. Yes, we have them all because we are human beings.

We can also change them if we face the fact that there could be a problem.

So my input is: Tell them that you as a parent would send the entire family out starving in the desert if they don't behaive. Just put the housekey in a envelope in front of them to tell them that an escort firm could come at some point and escort the entire family away in handcuffs.

How do you think you relationship with your parents would have been, if they had lied next to you in OP, a stone circle or in a dog cage? Would they by their own torment show you that they cared for you?
Title: Re: The parents could go too
Post by: psy on November 07, 2006, 03:19:37 AM
Quote from: ""Covergaard""
Family Brat camp from twentytwenty production has just finished a series, where the parents went along with their child.

There really cannot be an accurate TV documentary on programs unless the cameras are hidden.  What 20/20 showed was what we deal with on  fornits.

Quote

It worked good for two of the four.

It might have worked for three out of the four, but the mom could not face reality and discomfort in the desert, so she took the family out even when her boy seemed to improved.

Wow.  The cameras are there, the staff are on their best behaviour, and the spoiled mommy decides it's too much for her.  JEE SUS.  Somebody pack the bitch off to TB.

Quote
She just would not solve the problem.

I can understand why some parents outsource the whole thing to a strange company. It is hard to work with one self and those issues we all have. Yes, we have them all because we are human beings.

We can also change them if we face the fact that there could be a problem.

So my input is: Tell them that you as a parent would send the entire family out starving in the desert if they don't behaive. Just put the housekey in a envelope in front of them to tell them that an escort firm could come at some point and escort the entire family away in handcuffs.

How do you think you relationship with your parents would have been, if they had lied next to you in OP, a stone circle or in a dog cage? Would they by their own torment show you that they cared for you?


Well.  My parents were ignorant.  Otherwise they would be going to a nursing home a-la Abu Ghraibe.

Do I think it would have changed thier opinion if they had experienced what I had?  You have no idea how many times i have wished for just that -- not to hurt them, but to make them understand my pain and why i can't "just get over it".

Torment never shows care.  I have never understood "tough love". Such bullshit. You treat people like dirt and it is somehow "magically" supposed to make them better people.  FUCK NO.  It teaches you how to isolate, how to shut off, how to harden your heart to the suffering of others while you protect yourself from the constant bombardment of your psyche with endless mind games.  Eventually they break you and convince you that who you are is a lie, and they will sell you the truth.  That moment, you die inside, and then your former self starts to rot as you forget who you were.  Eventually, if you don't snap out of it, you end up dishing out the "emotional growth" as a parent, ed-con, or program staff.

It's the same thinking behind the person who says "my father beats me and i'm a stronger person for it, he cared about me".  And what do you think that person does to his child.

Where is the logic here.
The common fucking sense.
Hate begets what?  HATE!!!
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 07, 2006, 10:50:55 AM
I think Milk is a hero!
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: BSarro on November 07, 2006, 11:59:12 AM
For the last time, I am female. Show me some respect! Immature thugs on this forum!
Title: Re: To tell kids or not?
Post by: CCM girl 1989 on November 07, 2006, 01:09:03 PM
Quote from: ""Milk Gargling Death Penal""
Okay, this one's busting me inside.

I'm a mod of a forum I most certainly will not name on Fornits (and I most certainly don't use the name Milk Gargling Death Penalty there!), one where the primary subject is of interest to teenagers and pre-teens. Kids post there, kids I don't know the backgrounds of.

One part of me is saying "Jesus fuck, what if one of them really IS in danger of being sent away and I DIDN'T warn him?" and the other is saying "Cripes, asshole, if they really were they probably wouldn't be posting there, they're just kids and this shit will give them nightmares. Don't post it, they shouldn't even have to think about this!"

Which attitude is correct?



If you tell these kids, one of a few things could happen. They might correct their behaivor to avoid being sent away? They might feel like they need to keep secrets from their parents, therefore the lines of communication will go down, and they will just get better at hiding the bad behaivor? Or they could prematurely run away from home because they were paranoid that their parents might send them away when infact the parents don't choose to outsource their parental responsibilities, but to deal with it themselves.

I think you should alert them though. That way they have a chance to correct their behaivor. The other things that could happen, might just happen anyway?
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 07, 2006, 01:13:37 PM
I say again: Their actual behavior has extremely little to do with whether or not they get sent to a hellhole. It might create a near-miss moment (akin to the parents who read the ST thread and do the sane thing: run like fuck) if they talk about it before the ed-cons get involved, though.

Telling the kids does amp the paranoia up quite a bit- that much I'm sure of.
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on November 08, 2006, 07:35:03 PM
Quote from: ""Milk Gargling Death Penal""
I'm almost always of the opinion that sheltering children is stupid and a bad idea, but Fornits is one of the few exceptions. The things discussed here- propheets, raps, OP, long-term incarceration, and every word of it reality- are enough to make even me think twice.

Yeah, I chose to tell them.

Quote
maybe if they checked fornits out and it scared them bad enough some of them that are on the wrong path in life would take another look at how they are living their life

It might, but that's because the kids don't know that whatever they may or may not actually be doing has surprisingly little to do with whether they get sent away.

i agree fornits is tough, but fornits is reality also. if they come here and read far enough to read what we as children have gone through, then i am sure they have also read far enough to read that little to nothing can get you sent to one of these places. people underestimate the intelligence of children who participate on forums. i think very few who come here would see only part of what is said here. i am glad you told them, i feel strongly as if they have a right to read our history, and how that history has dictated our future.
Title: Re: To tell kids or not?
Post by: Anonymous on March 13, 2007, 03:23:55 PM
Quote from: ""Milk Gargling Death Penalty""
Okay, this one's busting me inside.

I'm a mod of a forum I most certainly will not name on Fornits (and I most certainly don't use the name Milk Gargling Death Penalty there!), one where the primary subject is of interest to teenagers and pre-teens. Kids post there, kids I don't know the backgrounds of.


WHAT A BIG SURPRISE!! NOT!!!  :roll:  :roll:  ::puke::
Title: To tell kids or not?
Post by: exhausted on March 15, 2007, 05:31:46 PM
It's a difficult decision to make, probably alerting them to the options their parents have if they start to act out is a good idea, but encouraging them to talk with their parents so there's an understanding as to what is acceptable, what is expected as normal teen behaviour would be a good idea, at least that way the teen has got in there 1st, talked maturely and sensivbly with the parent(s) and maybe they could draw up a contract that al parties stick to, rather than letting it go too far

The one problem you would have is with the teens who are sent away because they have chosen a career or girlfriend etc that the parents see as a danger sign of them becoming disobedient and unruly, or taking drugs  :roll: They don't stand a chance no matter what you say, their only option is to run as fast as they can