Fornits

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An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

I am not trying to be malicious to any of you by saying this, but it's seems as though some of you are missing the point. If you think about the whole aspect of John's work......he did make himself out to be like a therapist..he analyzed us and told us what we were, and weren't, or atleast convinced us.
I have no right, no matter what type of leader I am or claim to be, to analize anyone or place judment upon them unless I am a proffesional because these things are very sensitive, and can cause great damage to people. But John was not a simple person like me. He was a person in charge of an entire school having clear influence on every single person there. Yes John was a very intelligent person. He was very powerful. But his direction in leadeship did not lead everyone towards the right road..and he should have made it clear to parents and even students that his way might not be the right way for everyone, but he made us believe "His way or no way at all."
I still feel like I keep on repeating myself. Please please look at this from all perspectives. As I would, you would, parents would, inspectors would,lawyers would, friends would, even GOD would.  After all he is my only judge.

the post above was written by me..so there is no confusion about anon... :wink: chao..tell me what u think.

wow...all these anon...are confusing me too...but I am the anon who said I can't reveal myself..and joked about the prozac when I felt offended...anyway...

I posted this in another Topic , but I feel as though  I need to post it again, in case you miss it. It might help you understand me a little more.
tell me what you thin! thank you for listening even though we do not fully agree with everything.

I have a very decent life. I am very honest and aware of who I am today. But In my previous life, even before MMS I was not happy. I was abused, physically, sexually, emotinally, verbally, you name it. When I was sent to MMS I was supposed to get the proper attention and care for the pain that I had been through my entire life. I was extremely traumatized, and vulnerable.I needed understanding. I needed love and attention. I was only 14 years old. My case was extra sensitive, but it made me no more special than anyone. Instead of being understood I was told that I was in complete self-pity. I had been molested and I was told that I was a sex addict. I was abandoned, and I was told that I was ungrateful (because I had been adopted). I was confused, and I was told that I was manipulative.
I was hurting, and I was told that I was fine.
I was angry, and I was told that I was attention seeking.
There were only about 30 girls there at the time, and I felt like I was always kicked to the side. It was not my job to beg someone to do therapy on me. I was there because they were the therapists or mentors, and I was their client. I was not an adult...I was a little child not even fully developed why should have the waited for me to "step up"..it had been the whole reason why I was sent there in the first place.

I can understand that Mission mountain school might not have been the place for a child with my case....but Mission Mountain School, if it is proffesional, why didn't they just tell my parents that they couln't help me? That they didn't know how to help me? Instead I was labeled a sex addict, an alcoholic, even a drug addict?
I am none of these things..I was mis-diagnosed, and I applied myself to all the "Medications" (as in AA, SLAA, NA meeting..even working all the 12 steps!) So when leaving MMS my problems were maily these false addictions that I had, and my true pain was never really dealt with. Do you want to know the simplest way I fixed myself? One day I just decided that God would set things straight..and I did not need to keep on analyzing over and over to detail. There was no point anymore, and that the simplest thing. MMS made me feel insane...as if I was not going to make it in the world. They made me feel like I was an alien. As if I was going to be paralized my entire life.
You know how it would feel if a doctor makes a mistake and tells you you need all these medications to survive, and make sure not to go here and there, and you need to attend all these classes, and deprive yourself of this and that, and tippy toe every where you go because you might die..and then you realize that your real treatment could have been a simple shot on the arm. You feel like a dumbass for ever believing such a dumb doctor, who just wanted to make you do all these things to benefit himself ..., and ofcourse you still hold that grudge years and years after.....well thats how I feel...

I hated claiming that I was an addict because I was not, am not. But I trully started to believe it. The whole school does revolve itself around recovery, and all of the original staff that had opened the school from the beggining-John, Collen, DEb & Mike, and Gary are all recovering addicts. I went to the school for therapy not to "recover" from anything. I was 14, and I hadn't even fully developed. I hardly did ANY drugs, or alcohol and when I did these things they were out of plain curiousity and experimintation. I was labeled as an alcolic (mainly), and introduced myself as an alcoholic addict during meetings. YES 14 YEAR OLD ALCOHOLIC! and even if I had been 15,16,17 and perhaps 18 that's insane. We were not old enough to even know who the heck we were and here I got plastered with YOUR AN ALCOHOLIC! dam makes me laugh.    And then I went to meetings at the school and out side of the school! I would go to meetings and I was always the youngest. I took the meetings very seriously because I seriously thought I was an addict! Sitting there with these other folks who had been drinking for like 30 years and me.....who only drank a total of about 20 times?  I would collect my sobriety chips and even, speak during meetings, I even had a sponsor! Crazy!

Also about ALCOHOLICS ANONIMOUS, OR ANY OTHER ANONIMOUS GROUPS...I don't know how it is any where else, but in my city when I went to meetings it was so fake. A lot of people would go there dressed up, put loads of make up on, there were be clicks, many people competing for leadership, guys and girls checking eachother out, people having casual sex with eachother...it seemed to be so dishonest like everyone developed a new addiction. I realized that going there, even if I had been an addict, would NOT have been helpful. Everyone seeemed to just give themselves this title "ALCOHOLIC" because it was cool.I think that you should only be concidered an addict until the age of 21..when you have experinced enough to trully know. not just a label because it's cool, it seemed more like a social party scene to me.

(but I do give credit to those who are trully in recovery, and if you attend these meetings it is wiser to attend those older recoverying addicts-  adults...I mean real real adults like ages 35+......or prob older)

1 MORE THING....It's worrisome to me to think that some girls who left mms (many of them) still believe they are alcolics (and some trully are, so ignore this note if you are)....they might still be going to meeting like I had, even have a sponsor and the whole deal....but they aren't even addicts...that sounds like a major problem!
If I look back...I might be still going to meetings and "working the program" if I hadn't been slapped in the face with reality! Thank God I don't think that now!

who are you that replied on the fairness of the school?...I can see why others remain annonimous, but why do you if you think positively of the school?

There are many other posts on MMS and I suggests you read all of them....Go to the search on the website and write Mission mountain school there are many different forums that I am sure you would like to look at, if you haven't yet.