Show Posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Messages - lacey'smom

Pages: [1]
The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 14, 2009, 03:05:41 PM »
First off, I was 30 when pregnant with Lacey.  Hardly a pregnant teen.  If I wanted the money, I'd have stayed in that hell, let the live-in housekeeper raise the kids, gone on all the corporate jaunts and be the cute little "trophy wife" with the two beautiful children.  I had it made and to stay in the style to which I was acustomed, was an option and a hard one to give up.  I could have turned a "blind eye" to betrayals and the definate coming damage to the children, to  protect my "comfortable" life.  I enjoyed traveling first class around the world and struggled incredibly with my condition at the time, would I be the best person for the kids to be with?  Of course I debated seriously with what was the better of obviously, two evils.  At 53, I have broad shoulders.  You have incredible anger and to the end of working that out, if you need to rant at me, oh well.  As for being a drunk, again, as I know I have said this before, I started in Al-Anon in 1984.  I didn't dink through either of my pregnancies, but the moment the children were born and the in house nurse and housekeeper were there to "cover" things, I drank heavily.  I did not make the decision to seperate drinking.  I seperated 9/23/86 - court was 9/28 - moved to a much downsized lifestyle and was in the hospital to have my child by c-sect a few days later...with both kids, I was very sick afterwards. I do not need anyone's sympathy.   I do appreciate the empathy shown by some, but after 53 years of a very hard life, I take responsibility for my part in whatever bad choices I made.  As of April 28th 1989, I have been sober.  It took many 24 hour chips for me to get sober, starting in I a drunk? once a pickle, I say, always a pickle...that one, you never get to undo..Lacey spent all her young life going to AA mtgs...
I would put Lacey's elementary education and life experience up against your ignorant world view, anyday!  I may not be the best typest/speller/grammer person, but I have learned alot about mean-spirited people.  One of the issues was, in middle school when all the IEP crap started, the "testing" began.  She tested out at a college level of intellectual understanding of ideas.  Coming from a great-grandmother, who was an university trained opera singer, and coming from a long line of graduate level educated family, except me, it was not a suprise to me, her level of development.  You are right, she and I do have alot in common.  The STUPID? simple belief? hope? that people, for no reason, would hurt you.  I have never been able to proccess that and still don't.  After all the hurt and violation, I claim the right, to trust. but verify.  Lacey is a great mother and I don't know how old you are, but when my grandson goes off to college, she and her husband will be young enough to go travel the world and enjoy life.  I am proud of her and have great respect for the responsibility she has shown towards the challenges come her way.  She has "posted" to be accountable and your slander of her good life is beneath you.  I'm not sure how much my sharing is helping Lacey.  I will check with her, if I should write anything more....

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 13, 2009, 03:34:25 PM »
"third, I'm well aware of the problems within public schools. WHY NOT JUST MOVE TO ANOTHER DISTRICT? or send her to a private school as soon as she started fucking up? or send her out of the country to a school in canada, switzerland, or england? You obviously had plenty of money to lawyers and HLA. why not spend that money on a quality traditional private boarding school? heck, that's half the reason boarding schools exist! even if she was court ordered to NOT be allowed those options, are you going to let that get in the way? WTF did lacey do that was so bad she sentenced to a jail term? go to another state, and dont come back. they cant touch you. why would you even want to remain in a state that did such things to your family. you obviously had enough money for HLA, you have enough to move. not moving to keep your daughter out of jail is just plain selfish. "
To answer...when we lost Lacey's bother, July 4th,1983, the death affected both parents, extremely....the marriage had been very bad and destructive and now, with no children, I should have left then, but if I had, no Lacey...the desperate actions taken(a prolonged unbelievable confession by Lacey's father aug 23rd, 1983) to keep me in the that marriage, arguably, left me "not of sound mind"?  The promise, to make up for the betrayals, was for me to have the family I always wanted...should I have run for my life?  hindsight is 20/20 and of course, I should have, but I didn't..I had Lacey's older brother July 31st 1984 and by 12/85 filed for divorce for the sole purpose to gett he family one would listen..we had a brief week reconciliation at the Disneyland hotel, 1/86......hence May the drinking and abuse was life threatening, I allowed the Sptember 28th court date to stand and made plans to get out with a two yr old and 9 months pregnant...Lacey's father is close to 20 years older, many degrees more educated, and held all the assets and skeet guns in his possession....excuses? I don't know anymore, I felt I was running for my life and by this time, I was so emotionally beaten down, I fought for what was most important to me, my children - he got the assets, I got the children.....I thought it would stop there...move? transfer to private? all the suggesstions were perfectly reasonable, in a reasonable situation, this was not..the clever legal actions I had to take, to get Lacey out of our states clutches, was the best I could pull was a very complicated school/court/therapeutic fiasco, but I did manage to get her "out of harm's way" to Utah..obviously, much more complicated, but that is enough here......

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 13, 2009, 03:13:28 PM »
First, did you (lacey's mom) ever graduate from high school? your ramblings are incoherent. please look over them and make them make sense. good grammar and spelling is unnecessary, it's the internet. but clean that shit shit up, it's digusting how many commas you put in. You took five sentences and merged them into one, sometimes skipping from one subject to another within the same sentence.
hmmm - so I will just write, stream of thought in some answers here - I don't know how to do the whole quote reply thing yet, so this will have to do...
answers - to your considerate, not only did I NOT go to high school, I had NO benefit of ANY own story, too long for this did not prevent me from "faking it till I could make it"(obviously, "making it" is always in the eye of the beholder), working full-time at 14 -going to night school for years to try and get the society desired holy pieces of paper -  owning my own boutique in Topanga Canyon at 17 and transitioning to budget analyst/software support (1979 - 1984) hardware installer and moving up to being the most senior analyst, in the company I was with, amongst a group of all men, degreed engineers, by 1984, before I left to solely focus on raising my family....I respect education and tried to focus my kids on same, but in my business, the ole saying was, "those that can't do, teach" - I allowed my self NO excuses, I was going to be self-sufficient...sorry for not "communicating to your standards, but forgiving the excuse of no formal education, this subject matter is still quite raw for me...this is the 8th anniversary of putting my child, Aug 15th, 2001, on a plane to "trust other people in another part of the country to "help" my child, where I would not have "control"...having lost Lacey's younger brother when he was 14 years old, due to high-risk behavior, I was an overprotective, at home, single-parent mom, I leveraged everything I had at my disposal to solely focus on raising my children....again, sorry for the challenging writing...

second, theres more to this story than what your're telling us.  (geee, you think?  trying to share that which might be helpful, while protecting Lacey, is challenging......

I'll follow - up on your other questions in another as to make these not too long....

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 12, 2009, 08:21:31 AM »
My exposure to this long, horrible experience, taught me one huge piece of information, I would have never known.  Lacey, as probably most of you are, those who were "students", represent, the "best and brightest", from our society.  If you could have been easily "controlled", mentally or physically, there would have been, no problem.  Lacey was exponentially, way over and above me, her peers, the school workers, the healtcare workers, who tried to control her, hence the problems.  They best you as kids,  metaphorically speaking.  The only way to protect, the highest value our planet has, you, is to group up and come back at these pathetic control freaks and beat them at their own game, for the sole purpose of having those brilliant, vibrant, whacky kids coming behind you, to not be medicated, controlled or "labelled" and stuck out in the woods to be "used" by sicko, experts.  I know, I was one of you, back in the 60's, but it was a different world back then.

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 12, 2009, 08:10:10 AM »
Not to discourage you, but it matters little for you to put Bucci out of business.  You think that the staff that interviewed me, made reccommondations, took control of a vunerable teen, took the tuition, asserted undo control over an entire traumatized family and played footsie with the teams of Washington D.C. lawyers, controlled by Judge Dugan, who relied on the word of the GAL, Suzanne Duclos, you think these people, these "staff", went off quietly into the night, to get a "real job"?  The organization was made up of predator people. Those "highly trained experts" went somewhere and just becasue they are not with B anymore, does not mean they are not still practising the same raping of families.  I say, the starting point is the school system that starts this problem, by inserting their authority, as a higher authority, in the child's life, over the parent's.  Then when the child acts up, they turn on that child, start with their "helping experts", to invalidate the parent, who lacks the degrees, etc., in the "helping", healthcare field. I fought all the way up to the Superintendant of the school system that Lacey went to, with a adolescent attorney, in tow.  I had fought for two years, 1998-2000, with my personal attorney, through both the school and taking it to District Court, to force the school system to appropriately, treat my daughter's health and well-being over the minority overage predator, who sexually harrassed her and made her school life a living hell. They had the gall to tell me that this predator had a "Civil Right to an Education and they were allowed to keep his criminal status a secret from the other parents, because he was disabled and had a "right to privacy".  HLA was years down in the progression of events and by that time, the "decision process" had dozens of school figures, legal staff, therapy(I always loved Lacey's "the rapists) figures, psychiatrists down to social workers, and of course, don't forget, law enforcement, waiting in the wings to lock me or her up, if we crossed the line.  At the end, all I could do was to fight to keep her from being legally deemed at 18, to not be held till 19(of course, the GAL warned, threatened, that should she suffer trauma due to my not participating with the process of keeping her a 18-19 year old, I would be held personally, LIABLE). I took my chances and when she graduated and dissapeared for a time, all I could do was pray.  Today, those of you who know Lacey, she is an incredible person, wife, mother and professional.  I hope to help her sort out the 25 year chain of events that led us all to these events, but I say to you all, the problem is the trillions of dollars involved in the Universities and Healthcare/Judicial professions that will NOT give this income up quietly.  Your work belongs, organized to your Local, then State, then to you U.S. Legislators, to force them to listen to you and understand the problem and accpt, whatever solutions are proferred, have to be, WITH YOUR PARTICIPATION.  You have to decide, from when the problem starts, what are better solutions, than just sitting her and bashing pathetic bottom feeders. They are only the happy recipients of all the other organizations, who pay very high-priced lawyers, to defer, RISK! I DO NOT PRETEND TO KNOW THE ANSWERS OR I WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY.  I DO KNOW THE PROBLEM.  WE LIVED IT AS A FAMILY.

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 12, 2009, 07:34:31 AM »
For those of you here that truly are at tryingto get at the heart of this issue, transfer of liability is always the driving force. You are correct, the parent is the point of responsibility, but when you see you elementary school child slip from having always been an honor student(not a big deal, but an indicator of issues), first chair violin(not caring about their favorite talent, another indicator of issues), catcher on the softball team(getting hit by the ball rather than dominating the game, another indicator of issues), best in her dressage class(getting thrown from their horse, which never could have happened just weeks before, the hugest red flag!) and you go to the school or therapist for help, what you get are referrals. At the time, in your "clouded, concerned" state, you think you are getting help.  So you follow the thread of referrals, to the insurance company, which follows the referrals from the school. You start down the road of IEPs.  The IEPs escalate to removing "out of control" kids to a "better environment", which will be able to provide the required "services" to deliver the child's "constitutional right of the child to an education". Only way down this rotten road, later, do you realize that everyone was only out to "cover their ass", transfer liability off of themselves. The road is almost never short. It is years and many referrals later, you get ratchetted up to an involvement of the Judicial System, which only cares about controlling people to have a set point of maintaining the "norm". The school system protects from getting sued, the insurance company protects from getting sued, the Judicial System could care less about mixing "victums" with predators, so they mix rape victums with predators and then you get all the way through the inpatient hospitals and outpatient programs to finally, the ed consultant(which you don't know is in the pocket of the TBS) and you find yourself following these experts, to sending your kid to the "best" possible environment. The kid, given there are millions of dollars and non-caring other adults involved, who see an opportunity to manipulate and make themselves the center of attention, if they have been ignored all their life, by this other adult, figure that this other parent must really "care" and they tragically get pulled down this road.  The TBS, seeing the piles of money available to them and seeing the convulated, complicated parental emotions involved, drools with anticipation to participate in a scenerio, that the longer they perpetuate the twisted scenerio, the more money they will make. What would be the TBS's motivation to "help" sort outthe twisted scenerio with the kid.  If they did, NO MORE MONEY FOR THEM!  This is true of the school sytem(theraputically trained persoonnel make way more then regular staff), the psychiatrists only make more money, the more complicated and serious their diagnosis.  In today's society, this industry of "troubled families", broken families, is worth trillions. Society breeds, lack of respect for parents, lack of respect for morals or values, lack of respect for family structure, turn to the almighty "state for all your answers. They can "help".  When the "experts, help", you lose all your power as a parent and you get caught in the web of, "it is not my fault".  It is my fault.  I do care and it is my responsibility for listening or trusting all these goons!

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 11, 2009, 09:20:27 PM »
Lacey asked me to divulge the "thread" that got her to HLA.  I thoughtthis would be a scenerio that would make it easier to her and help in your cause, which I support.  I did not "join" the suit, as I was still being sued and it would have only prolonged the multiple suits against me.

To honor my daughter's wishes, I will do the thread privately with her and then if she can help, whatever your causes are, I give her my blessing and will help her as I can.

As to suing all these entities, Lacey would have to know the whole story and decide for herself, if in participating in that activity, it would not further hurt her.

Thank you for your kind words.  There has been way hurt enough on so many people's parts and I wish I could have done more to help other's, but the health and well being of our family had to come first.

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 11, 2009, 05:09:30 PM »
how little pg54 counselor knew - lacey was court ordered - as of 08 10 2000 - the public school system (due to choices lacey made to manage her reactions to the stresses from ongoing family litigation from before she was born) referred her to RICA/Mark Twain..basically a low end public jail for teens...only through Children's Hospital contacts to Patricia Murphy, one of Bucci head goons, did Lacey avoid that hell and I get to slip her out of state to Utah...if pg54 counselor actually have "knowledge", they would have known the judge, GAL, and multiple law firms(Q&Q was small potatoes compared to these big boys/girls)that had total control over placement. The only reason my phone calls/contact could be controlled, under threat of jail, was that the Court was in complete control.  My being in jail would have made me completely unavailable upon her graduation.  Emotional screwballl?  ok, I can own that, but if you all here truly want to put forth better solutions, it would have had to have been years before HLA was in the picture.  With Patty Murphy in Bucci's pocket, and in cohoots with the GAL and the opposing law firm, there was no discussion on placement of "placement".  Patty Murphy tried to bribe me with issues being negotiated in an ongoing lawsuit, for NOT placing, but as the ed consult had no knowledge of the lack of reliability of the parties, it was ludicrous to "trust" her interference.
Solutions people - parents are reading with kids in the early stages of these challenges and I challenge you all to address better solutions than the ones i was offerred!!!!

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 10, 2009, 09:51:39 PM »
pg54-in time, if u were on "staff" during pg54-all will come out, as I kept EVERY shred of docs from intake to out take, from all the flaming money grubbing "health-care" providers, that systematically raped this family and I am turning them all over to Lacey and she would figure out who you are(were you the one who forbid me to call my own child, as you determined, I was inappropriate??)...every stinking piece of paper - since you know her last name, some day, to amuse yourself - log on to the 30 years+ of legal docs -using her last name, in the County and State she was from, since you know so much and avail  yourself of multi-state government/healthcare manipulation of a family that included Judges, Both Adolescent and Adult Law Firms, Pysychiatric Hospitals, TBS, Wilderness Programs, Public School Systems, Private Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Theurapists and on and on...I don't care your personal or professional experience, you had NO idea what our family dealt with and my only ability to protect my daughter from garbage kids should never know about an absent parent, was to legally take the path I took.With all the postings here and I do care that those of you with the experitse and will contribute to change the available solutions for parents like myself, as you weild the power of your pen, try to remember, some of us coming to this horrible choice, had already sufferred the loss of a previous child to exactly the same set of circumstances.Lacey had a brother, who did not get put in any kind of treatment.  He had very similar challenges and I read with humor the alternatives to treatment given here and can tell you, I TRIED THAT WITH HIM!  It didn't work. As his chosen "Mother", I had the "honor?" of letting that first handful of dirt fall from my hand onto his coffin, dead at 14 years old!!.Lacey has siblings that did not take the same path and you might, as pg54 referred to her offspring, call them "successful".  Same parents, same environment, who can tell why some kids go one way and others, another? You want to help the next parent sitting suicide watch on their kid tonight? not knowing if they will kill themselves or you, then stop all the infighting and join forces and truly go out with one voice and demand that the "powers that be" listen to you,  I do not think you have the answers, but YOU CERTAINLY HAVE THE RIGHT QUESTIONS....

The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy / Re: HLA Facebook Groups
« on: August 10, 2009, 10:34:14 AM »
I have not posted on here in quite a while.  I am the mother of one of the "teens", who was at HLA for a very long time and at her encouragement, I have periodically read on the website and a long time ago, posted some thoughts.  I am saddened to see so much time wasted on accusations and banter that has nothing to do with addressing the sad state of options to parents with very dire parental situations, relating to their teens/family's health and well-being.  Like most parents involved in deeply troubled home circumstances, I was in desperate straights, when I had a adolescent attorney, at the advice of Children's Hospital in Washington D.C., help me wrest my daughter from a placement at RICA/Mark Twain(coincidentally, this is the same place that the male teen minority, known sexual predator, allowed to attend her middle school, who sexually harrassed her attended, that I had had to pay an attorney to force the Montgomery County Court to make the public school get him away from my daughter, so she had the right to go to school and attempt to get an education, without the predator in her proximity), in Rockville, MD.  The High School she attended fought me on services to assist her declining state of health, until they deemed her to be totally not serviceable and could refer her off to the highest level of public/mental incarceration.  For the past 40 years, I have had knowledge of and experience with family challenges and no different than back in the 60's, 70's and on, there is still more fighting and misunderstanding of defining the problem, than there is in any appropriate dialogue about solutions.  That goes for the institution, the parents, and the now adults, who endured placement at any "solution" that parents were "stuck" with in an attempt to address, what they felt was a "dire" circumstance.

My suggestion - parents truly want loving options, rather than fight about who is lying about stuff here, you seem like incredibly intelligent people, where are  your alternative solutions to the next set of parents that come along with life-threatening circumstances or legal ramifications, where they are being forced by society, to "do something"?

That is what I'd like to see......

Pages: [1]