Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

Orlando Sentinel:
ABC has perfected the feel-good reality show with "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition." The network has gone another route with reality recently, with some disastrous results.

Brace yourself for feel-uneasy TV.

"Brat Camp," debuting Wednesday, tracks nine reckless teens whose desperate parents ship them off to a wilderness boot camp to shape up. The goal is laudable, but the program turns voyeuristic and intrusive.

There's no contest among the participants on "Brat Camp." The unruly teens have been sent off to SageWalk, The Wilderness School, in remote Oregon, to be broken of their destructive ways.

The situations are dramatic and shocking. The therapists react thoughtfully but firmly. The teens comport themselves before the camera with chilling ease. Socially awkward Frank and compulsive liar Jada are the dominant figures in the two-hour premiere.

Yet "Brat Camp" operates on the questionable notion that intense, personal therapy can be adapted into entertainment for the masses. This programming for a summer night depends on confused, young lives that might be better off protected from a camera's invasiveness.

The narration often sounds too optimistic for the dire situations. There's a lot more at stake with "Brat Camp" than whether it succeeds in the ratings. It will take years to understand whether the children turned themselves around.

ABC likes to trumpet that its reality programs provide wish fulfillment. Yet you might wish that "Brat Camp," like the recently yanked Austin-set series "Welcome to the Neigh-borhood," hadn't reached the air.

As many people who were in Elan with me can attest to, I have a big problem with organization.  I have improved on it, but never conquered it.  Needless to say, my desk at the PR company I work at in NYC is a mess.  Last night, I received a polite e-mail from a colleague asking me to clean it up  -- even though I'd already started.

So this morning I came in and the desk was spotless.  Empty too.  While relieved it was clean, I suspected the office cleaners (who had worked the previous night) had thrown away my stuff (including meeting notes, brochures) and other important things.  I also had two bags of chocolate candy (that I'd bought for the office) missing.  I turned to the colleague who sent me the e-mail and said, "This can't be the desk you e-mailed me about."   She shook her head.

So I was like, "Damn cleaners stole my stuff!"  I was mad.  A crowd of co-workers gathered around my desk.  I picked up the phone and started talking to my wife.  Suddenly, my colleague Charlotte said, "Hey, I found this Rolodex on my desk, is it yours?"  Then Michelle was like, "I found this pile of stuff on the boss's desk.  Then Takisha was like, "I found this on someone else's desk.  Does it belong to you?"  Slowly, over a period of several minutes, my stuff was returned -- including the candy.  I still thought the cleaners had moved it around.

Slowly, everybody popped out from their cubicles.  Someone hinted at April Fool's and my jaw dropped.  Then Michelle was like, "Love ya Pete."  It was awesome.  Then I started organizing my desk.  I can take a hint!

I had an Elan dream the other night.  I don't consider them nightmares anymore because I'm so used to them.  But this one wasn't pleasant -- until I woke up.

The theme was the same.  I leave Elan in 1996 and get sent back about two years later, ostensibly for "fucking up" in some way (I never know why).  Upon return, I just sit there for two years and nobody wants to promote me or let me re-graduate or whatever.  So one day I go home for a home visit.  By now, I'm in my 20s and I've become convinced that the staff does not have my best interests at heart.  I decide that since I've graduated the program once already, I should just sign out because I'm missing valuable life experience from being institutionalized for a long time.  

So I wait for the home visit and I tell my mom and stepfather (they're divorced now, but in the dream, they're still together) that I want to leave and move on and that I'm not going back to Elan.  Before I can say anything, Clare Woodman appears in a chair in my living room.  She seems kind (not at all angry) and asks me to explain myself.  So I say that I've been in Elan forever and I want to leave.  She appears surprised and says, "But Pete, you left Elan three years ago."  Then I wake up and realize I actually left back in 1996 and never got sent back.

I think this dream symbolizes that I think about Elan too much.   Any other thoughts?

By the way, I'm not somebody who dwells or is still angry at the place.  It just had a big impact on my life; that's all.

During one of the three presidential debates, President George W. Bush abruptly reversed himself in mid-sentence.  ?The Constitution says we?re all? it doesn?t say that?? Bush declared.  Many wrote off the sentence as a Bush-ism, a typical trademark of an inarticulate bumbler.  The probable truth is much more sinister.  

I believe Mr. Bush was about to say, ?The Constitution says we?re all equal.?  He stopped himself mid-sentence because either:

A. He doesn?t believe that.
B. He was opening himself up to an incredible line of attack for not treating his fellow Americans equally
C. Both

When it comes to treating Americans equally, Mr. Bush has a dismal track record.  

ß He has become the first president since the days of legalized slavery to attempt to write discrimination into the Constitution by calling for a constitutional amendment outlawing gay marriage.  

ß He seems to refuse to acknowledge gay people exist ? never using the word ?gay? in his speeches or answers to journalist?s questions and only today endorsed civil unions when he?s desperate for Democratic votes ? eight days before the election.

ß His administration has not sought to aid poor minorities in any meaningful way.  He boasts of greater homeownership, when most minority families can?t afford a home and must rent ? yet we?re losing affordable housing.  

ß His tax cuts disproportionately benefited those in the highest tax bracket to the average tune of $60,000 a year, while those in the lowest tax bracket are redeemed a measly $91.  

ß He has recklessly put soldiers from small towns and/or poor communities (who joined the Army to escape drab, hopeless home lives) in harm?s way with a clearly unnecessary war in Iraq.

ß He turns his back on the sick and senior citizens and panders to the drug companies by not taking any action to allow the importation of prescription drugs from Canada.

ß He again turns his back on the sick by severely limiting stem cell research, which has shown promise in fighting cancer, AIDS, Parkinson?s disease and Alzheimer?s disease, among other afflictions.

ß He claims he wants Americans to have more money in their pockets, yet he refuses to endorse a minimum wage increase ? the minimum wage has been $5.15 since 1997.  Guess he only wants his corporate pals to have more money.

ß Other companies have lost out on important work in Iraq thanks to $7 billion in no-bid contracts for Halliburton, which recklessly overcharged us as a result.

The list goes on.  But you get the idea.

I became a Democrat this year after years of being a registered independent.  I have voted for Republican candidates in elections in 1998, 2002 and 2003.  I am open-minded and fair.

John Kerry might not possess Clinton-like charisma.  But Lord knows, he can do better.  That?s why I?m voting for John Forbes Kerry for president of the United States.  I hope you do too.

Peter Moore

Who was reminded of their days as a coordinator by that show's final episode?

Donald Trump seemed just like Clare or Marc, especially in the A.M. meetings.  And I had to deal with a few Omarosas in my day.  

One time, Clare shot down a coordinator with those same words The Donald uses: "You're fired."

Christ has risen indeed!

My e-mail is [email protected]