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Messages - NOT12NOW

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The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 10, 2006, 11:44:00 AM »
Loretta, Mary from Parma.

The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 10, 2006, 11:41:00 AM »
I remember Ellen particularly from car pool.  My mom got a cb radio which we all played with-- Ellen's handle was the wild west.  

She was also in the greaser girls act in the seed anniversary show with me (1976.)  When we were Getting into character in the parking lot, acting druggy and aggressive, she actually scared me.
Other than that moment when I realized she could beat the shit out of me I was comfortable with her.  She was very NY funny.

Does anybody else remember that weird talent show thing that year.  We did this very silly one that Art apparently didn't like?

The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 10, 2006, 11:24:00 AM »
Karen you married Jon P?

The Seed Discussion Forum / Teenage Wasteland
« on: May 10, 2006, 11:21:00 AM »
Well, if your going to bolt.  Why not the Sex Pistols.

The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 09, 2006, 09:50:00 AM »
i remember you wnet on permissions with my sister - you went to randall park mall and ate at a hamburger joint that had a western theme and you guys (your mom included) sat at the tables for kids where the seats were actually saddles (i remember my sister telling me about it) - i guess it was to prove how  not into acceptance or being worried about being cool you guys were."

That actually seems like something I'd do now for kicks, so maybe I did find ways to have some fun in those days.  Your sister must have been one of the girls I felt least threatened by. Where is she now?  You have no idea how happy it makes me to be reminded of events where I actually might have had a good time while I was at the seed.  

The guy I was thinking of must have been Quentin
cause I Kevin and I were close after we graduated-so I knew him well and the guy I was thinking of wasn't quiet.  He had a good singing voice, Art would get him up in front to sing.

Cleveland chick 76-77[ This Message was edited by: NOT12NOW on 2006-05-09 06:51 ]

The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 08, 2006, 04:55:00 PM »
Sorry there, Jim B., didn't mean to question your personal hygeine.

The Seed Discussion Forum / 76-77 Seed Grads
« on: May 08, 2006, 09:16:00 AM »
That psychologist, his enthusiasm for the program
probably got more kids in there than anything else.  I remember being told they used him to make sure they were not admitting truelly mentally ill kids, never any sense that he might be evaluating kids in order to see if they needed to be in the seed at all.
I was admitted without seeing him.
Still it was the enthusiasm of experts that convinced my parents to put me in.  The junior high principal, my parents marriage counselor both recommended it.

The Seed Discussion Forum / "the rules"
« on: May 08, 2006, 09:07:00 AM »
Didn't Jimmy get started over when he was on his three nights.  I think that was the kid.  He was stood up yelled at for a long, long while and then marched back to the front row.  Never knew why, scared the shit out of me.

Suzanna and Stephanie, they were the sisters with the father who was a doctor.  They were shaker kids like me so we used to car pool together.   I remember hearing that Stephanie had split a few times when she first came in.  It was always so hard for me to imagine her as someone who had bolted cause she seemed so limp by the time I knew her.

I remember Fred, was never close enough to see his tattoo but I do remember him.  One of the few non-white seedlings.  He was older right, back to work not back to school?

As I remember it, we all turned our entire bodies around to look at the person who was speaking, turning just ones head didn't show the proper enthusiasm.  

Theres a girl who's name I am trying to remember.
She was on the front row when my parents brought me to an open meeting. She had platinum hair. At the open meeting she said she wanted to make staff so I was suprised when I was admitted to see that she was actually pretty resistant.  I think she was on her front row for a long while.  When I came in(late may 76) she was on the front row with me and had apparently been there awhile.  I remember  once she got told off during a rap about work when she said that she intented to be an artist(the right answer was, of course, some profession that would allow you to help others---"that is if I don't make staff."
She got started over after she went back to school for hanging out with old friends.

ring any bells

The Seed Discussion Forum / Teenage Wasteland
« on: May 06, 2006, 10:09:00 PM »
I saw him, My Dad Is Dead that is.  A sort of one man band deal, right?  This was a long time(15 yrs?)ago at a small club in burlington vt.
I remember him explaining his band name by saying so many bands at the time were using death in their names irreverently -- Dead Kennedy's, Death On A Stick-- during the time his father was truly dying.[ This Message was edited by: NOT12NOW on 2006-05-06 19:24 ]

The Seed Discussion Forum / 76-77 Seed Grads
« on: May 05, 2006, 07:27:00 AM »
Is that a joke?  I hope so.

The Seed Discussion Forum / 76-77 Seed Grads
« on: May 04, 2006, 06:09:00 PM »
Does anyone besides me see that striking difference between the female and male experience when it comes to off time and "fun"?

Absolutely, I never had a friend in the seed.  There were girls I felt more anxious around and girls I was able to relax with a bit more but "good times" always seemed like imitations of good times and I felt we were always watching each other.  I went on outings during my three nights, and acted all goofy on over nights but I was always on guard

In my experience this didn't just mean we ratted on each other but that we threatened to do so all the time.  
Example, once another seedling girl asked about some kid she saw me speaking to at school concluding with,? I just find I have to be careful."  A few minutes later I questioned her choice of clothing saying, "Don't you worry about wearing pants that are cut like jeans? (Druggyish)   She tried to squeeze away from my threat by saying,? I think there ok. Their not denim," to which, I said,? I just find I have to be careful about what I wear."  
Off time felt more like lunchtime in the group--no rap but you can still get in serious trouble if you say or do something wrong.

One sad exception, I almost had one friend.  A girl I started doing stuff with when we were both on our three nights.  I do remember some fun with her though I can't remember exactly what, just that I liked spending time with her.  Finally one of our outing requests was rejected which scared the shit out of both of us. We ratted on each other--don't remember for what and never hung out again.  

It seems to me that the women who say they remember good times were generally older when they were in the program.  It was always my experience that old seedlings seemed more relaxed.  Perhaps they were less terrorized by the esp. shit.   If you don?t believe that the people around you can read your mind and that you should be able to read theirs the threat is more limited.

Incidentally all of my closest friends after I graduated were seed grads too, but they were all guys.  It took a long while (like into adulthood) for me to learn to trust women.

Cleveland chick 76-77

The Seed Discussion Forum / site help Greg?
« on: May 04, 2006, 04:55:00 PM »
Thanks, all set.

The Seed Discussion Forum / some specific staff members
« on: April 26, 2006, 07:06:00 PM »
You are sisters, right? So she was sitting quite near you on the front row.

I love the story about how she lobed ice cubes at the rows behind her.   I love to hear about kids who fought back, sometimes I wish I had fought back too, but all in all I am glad I  protected myself the best way I knew how, invisibility and compliance.  I quickly figured out that I was dealing with an unbeatable force.  Kept my head down, my hand up and got through as fast as I could.


Cleveland chick 76-77[ This Message was edited by: NOT12NOW on 2006-04-26 16:10 ]

The Seed Discussion Forum / Cleveland Seed Revisited
« on: April 26, 2006, 01:50:00 PM »
On 2006-04-09 11:26:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I was talking to my mom and google Art Barker Fla. and found this site.  I my stint at the seed in cleve. I entered spring of 76.....I remember the winter of 77. I was a newcommer in the chicks apartment with Ellen...moved back a seed kid in 82...divorced him in 01...Jon P.  My sisters also attended Judy and Nancy.  I still stay in touch with Dave M. he lives in L.A. I am going to tell him about this site.  I still live in cleve. and I may move to an Ashram in India one day. I feel I get value in pretty much any experience I have even the seed, they taught me how to not talk to people{ha} if I don't want to. I have done quite a bit with my life some stuff I am proud of some not so good....c'est la vie Karen K"

I know you.  We car pooled together to the east side.  You and your sister used to pick me up at junior high and drive me to the seed after school. Amy B

The Seed Discussion Forum / some specific staff members
« on: April 26, 2006, 01:41:00 PM »
As far as my sister, as soon as she was allowed to  go home, she started writing "the Seed Sucks" all over the neighborhood. She was a real anomaly, entirely resistant to indoctrination.."

 Interesting so they eventually gave up and let her go home?  Did she graduate?

Cleveland chick 76-77[ This Message was edited by: NOT12NOW on 2006-04-26 10:42 ][ This Message was edited by: GregFL on 2006-04-26 19:30 ]

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