Fornits

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An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent.
-Mahatma Gandhi

Thanks Botched, you reminded me of a few hundred rules I had forgot about. They aren't exactly the same but the majority is very consistent.

(DANGER: Parent/Child communication may prevent treatment!!!)
For those who lack the sense of humor gene, that last statement is sarcasm. I know,.... no laughing matter. Let's proceed.

No communication between kids and parents in the early stage of the program. Open meeting is very controlled. If "Talk" is achieved the newcomer gets 5 minutes to talk to the parents about his/her past and is also tightly controlled so nothing else is discussed. The newcomer is "prepped" before talk under threat of punishment if anything unexpected should happen. The child is told that the parents already know about the abuse to the newcomer and agree with it. This is used to dissuade him/her from asking for help. The parents are told a number of lies and deceived into thinking that their child is an addict with a serious disease and will lie and manipulate to get out and back to the dangerous lifestyle. "Talk" is basically being under duress.

Early days in the program are important days for the parents to realize, something is wrong and get their kid out.

The Appearance: The child has a serious mental disease that can only be treated by the program through tough love and separating the parents from the child for a lengthy amount of time. The child needs to be taken from the outside world to focus on him/her self to be shown that he/she does indeed suffer from this affliction and needs to focus on their problems without distraction from anything in the outside world.

The Truth: Brainwashing doesn't happen overnight. The program needs weeks and perhaps even months to indoctrinate this imaginary belief system. Total control of communication especially with family is of utmost importance to disguise the tactics involved. The first segment of the program is used to break the child psychologically. When the child has been broken, he/she is brainwashed and 2nd phase is given to them.



By the time the child reaches 2nd phase, he/she is believed to be brainwashed and subsequently allowed to be trusted not to reveal confidential information about the program. Once I became brainwashed, I was in total belief that I had been saved by this miraculous program. I would have fought to the death for that place. On my higher phases I would go to schools and conduct speaking engagements and tell kids and parents that I would be dead without this program. I believed it wholeheartedly. This is why the kids don't want to leave after they been in there for while. It is the same reason some cult members defend their torturous cult, they have been brainwashed over time.

"Is it a feel good or a good feeling"?  

One of the program sayings to get you to delay gratification. Could be a useful tool in psychotherapy but in the hands of the program it is an implement of torture.

The Appearance: A good therapeutic tool used to encourage responsible behavior.

The Truth: A tool used as a mental torture to disallow the victim from practicing his/her own individual human rights, such as; eating food or getting adequate sleep. (Oh yeah, Or looking at the opposite sex)

-T

Does the T&R shine count for an appearance/reality topic? The parents LOVE it so much that they even buy the expensive polishes and all sorts of high gloss care products to maintain it.

Ahhhh    Good ole T&R.  and "The shine".  The transition from a freethinking traumatized kid to a brainwashed phaser.  Isn't it horrible when the highlight of your day is getting the privilege to scrub out toilets? God, how I yearned to scrub those damn toilets.

The Appearance: Kid improving.

The Truth: Kid losing mental grasp on reality.

-T

I thought I would start a post that takes the little rules and things that happen in these programs and one by one, state what appears to be happening and what truly is happening. I think this would be a good post for parents to see how they are being fooled.

I would ask that we post one thing at a time to keep it concise. Also, I like the, "The Appearance:, and The Truth:" approach. I hope this will make it more simple to see how the program deceives the parents and the public.

Tony

I have many thoughts about the rights issue, but the main one is that the kids are not allowed to talk to their parents as per KHK staff judgement. According to at least the Virginia laws, drug treatment of minors and adults is considered voluntary by rule. That chain of command crap is just that... crap! When mom and dad decide to put their kid in KHK, they know full well that the kid will not be allowed by program rules to talk to them until the program staff decides it is ok. They don't even know where their kid is staying at night... right? Essentially, this is no different than parent approved kidnapping in my opinion. Back in the 1800's, kids were usually never allowed to speak at the dinner table. KHK is not the dinner table, so to speak, its a highly abusive environment that cuts off the communication between parent and child in order to help the kid feel so damn helpless that they have to conform or they will suffer grave consequences. Hell, they may even suffer those consequences anyway, even if they conform right away. The whole time the kid is being kept away from mom/dad, the staff is giving the parents a lecture about how their kid isn't ready to speak to them or whatever, making the parent think that their kid is SO bad off that he/she will die without further treatment in their program. So, when open meeting comes, no talk, oh well, the parent will never know what happened that week except from what the staffer told them.
No parent who has any sense of responsibility to their child should ever put their kid in the care of anyone who will not allow that child to talk to them ANYTIME they need to for whatever reason. In the case of detention or something, yeah, the jail is jail, what do you expect? KHK is a "non-profit" OUTPATIENT drug treatment program??? Give me a break!!!!!!!!

RG

Is PFC/KHK a non-profit or a for-profit organization?   -Tony

My name is Tony and I "7stepped" the kids helping kids program and was a trainee on staff for a number of months. I also returned to group to support the kids thereafter. I was eventually shunned and ostracised by executive staff and, in turn, all staff.

I don't remember everything that occured while I was in KHK Hebron from 86-88. However, I do remember quite a bit about the experience and how I felt something was not only wrong but almost sinister going on.
Total secrecy to the outside world? Communications to family rigidly limited which almost seemed to cause only ambiguity and distrust. From the first day, my intake, I was severely humiliated in any way they could implement. Now, in my mind, there is a divisions between the pre-brainwashed and the brainwashed. I choose to call this "first phase" and then "all other phases and beyond".

 I am primarily more interested with the first phase experience which consists of immediate lying and coercion, psychological deteriorative tactics, constant noise disturbances to disturb thinking patterns (songs and chants), distrust of outsiders,  constant suggestive mental conditioning, sleep deprivation, food deprivation, sunlight deprivation, outside deprivation, confusion, physical exhaustion, the constant onslaught of demeaning, demoralizing, and totally humiliating behavior, negative peer emotions and aggressions aimed at forcibly and encouraged or directed by staff to impose oppression and the belief that you were, in fact, powerless and worthless. Self hate accompanied by overwhelming shame and guilt were also used to break down not only your individuality but also your identity as a good, healthy person. Dread caused by the unknown and forced allegiance to the program and god went against all I had learned in civics class. All I had learned about Freedom, Liberty and Justice for all. Also, this ideology went against all I had learned in my church experiences.

All of these tactics and inhumane behind the scenes activities have been scientifically proven to cause severe psychological issues. These practices were intended for the sole purpose of brainwashing us. This purpose enables the program to retain control and exploit both kids and parents for financial gain while keeping the actions attributed to their unsubstantiated success a secret allowing them to continue this torturous behavior. The kids are in the dark and the parents are fed lies to "explain" why this tough love is so desperately needed. The parents are controlled by fear and that lack of total program support is indicative of the parent not loving their child. Another core guilt tactic.

Once I was brainwashed, I was no longer in control of my identity, my thoughts and even my actions. I was a minion, a carbon based, programmed, biological robot. Or simply put, a mind controlled slave. This is why I focus more on first phase because this is where I believe the emotional trauma and psychological damage is inflicted at it's utmost. I still hated myself and took responsibility for all problems I encountered after "working the program". Because I was brainwashed, I believed that without the program and it's own version of reality that I would die. Drugs and alcohol would intice me and I would succumb to the druggie lifestyle and through a course of a downward spiral, die. I cannot explain why I, due to the overwhelming abuse, attempted suicide and carved up my arm in the program on first phase only to love the program and defend it with all my heart only months later. They hadn't changed. My brain had been tampered with and altered methodically and systematically. I was brainwashed.

I don't feel guilty for my actions supporting the program after first phase, but I also do feel very guilty still.  I realize that I had no control. I fought for months to not be broken, but I was broken. I inflicted all the tactics, tortures and behaviors that I had been subjected to on others. I completely believed that it was for the good of the phasers. As I mentioned, I do feel guilty. Not only for the shame and humiliation I received from the group about how terrible of a person that I was lead to believe, but moreso the way I was part of the degrading, monstrous behaviors that I know have harmed so many people in so many ways. I became what I hated which is carried within my mind and I suspect is one important reason I never wanted to think about it after I started to become less-brainwashed after graduating.

You can capture certain abuses on tape. You can find broken laws and attempt to prosecute. You can even walk through and see the shiny, smiling evidence of a program that is a possible success. Ultimately what you don't see is the truth. The Truth! The damage done and being done is for the most part, inside the brain of the kids. It lingers in our brains, out of sight and any problems derived from the brainwashing are attributed to our own lack of mental health, or the poor choices we have made. We are discredited for our past and present and the cycle of program lies drives on. As our lives, hobbled by the program, continue.

These are some of my thoughts about my personal experience with this program at this point in time. I am starting to be able to write thoughts in a cohesive manor. Many thanks to all of you who are aiding in my recovery from this and many thanks to all of you who have been active in fighting against this establishment that feed their own mental illness on the easy prey of children without protection and for immense monetary gain.

Some thoughts,
Tony