Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

// Ripping another parent up and down for looking for help with their child, os NOT helpful or necessary. //

I Agree.
Others disagree.
Such is the nature of life.
My concern has to do with a *Type* of program, and the mindset that abuse and neglect are acceptable methods to make a kid regret their past behavior;  'see the light' and make a change.
Not only does it not work, it kills kids. Those who survive are going to be dealing with a lot of unpleasant fall out.
Thayer seems to fit the description of this type of program.
Capt. Nemo has come to a board built around opposition to such programs and defended one. This is bound to draw all kinds of fire and is to be expected.
I regret the suggestion he be neutered; that is counter productive and likely to solidify his notion that all in opposition are wakko and close his mind like a steal trap against the possibility he should consider other options.

//Yes, I've seen/heard of those incidents before (from your links). Sad and unfortunate for sure. //

I would say more like horrible beyond belief and outrageous in the extreme.
So you have heard about these events - Have you actually read the accounts? Do you realize how callous to human suffering the staff were? How ignorant and hateful? Do you realize this is the norm, in the Type of program of concern here? This is what you get when you buy a punitive 'boot camp' program. A program designed to break a kid down for modifying. Its dangerous.[ This Message was edited by: BuzzKill on 2004-09-06 07:45 ]

Having heard wwasp was operating a home for pregnant girls I called Teen Help to ask about it.
These are my notes:
 
 
New Beginnings

http://www.th.nbmaternityhome.com
 
$3700
High School, Fully accredited, don't ya know.
seminars, Naturally
adoption / keep / adopted parents may help pay
located in wing off hospital ~

However - I couldn't find the name of the hospital on the web site.
Location was vauge; Southern Utah. Closest fully equipped ER is an hour and a half away.

Anyone else creeped out to think of these people operating a teen mother's home?
Wonder how much the adoptive parents pay for the babies? Wonder how much choice the girls really have, if they want to keep their babies?

I have no personal experience with Thayer. My experience was with WWASP. Seems they have a connection with the Bundy's; and it seems the Bundys are running a program on the wwasp model.
All I know is what I have heard from others, and I base my opinion on this alone.
I wanted to suggest you take a look at a what ISAC has put together on this subject. It might help with the big picture.
I  am glad your son seems to be doing better - apparently healthy. That is good news. I'm not trying to be a smart ass with this; but do be aware that the fall out from this experience could be pretty sever. You can't say how well a program "worked" until the "student" has been out for awhile. PTSD is  common in people who have been threw situation such as Thayer and WWASP. You might want to be sure to save enough to help him get the appropriate therapy for PTSD; Just in case. If after his release, he falls apart, please don't write him off; even if it is five years later - as it might be. Look into this possibility and help him recover. Meanwhile, research PTSD. Learn what you can about it; b/c otherwise, you might not recognize what is happening. Patients are sometimes diagnosed as Psychotic or Bi Polar or adicts - when it is in fact PTSD. And its important to get it right, b/c PTSD is highly treatable and the medications, if any, very different than with what it is often confused for.
 
http://www.isaccorp.com/thayer.html

For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone: Don't take that bad day out on someone you know, take it out on someone you *don't* know! Now get this.

I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered nicely saying, ''Hello?' '

I politely said, ''This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?''

Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits incorrectly. After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.

When the same person once more answered, I yelled, ''You're a jackass!'' and hung up.

Next to his phone number I wrote the word ''jackass,'' and put it in my desk drawer.

Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills, or had a really bad day, I'd call him up.

He'd answer, and I'd yell, ''You're a jackass!''

It would always cheer me up.

Later in the year the Phone Company introduced caller ID. This was a real disappointment for me, I would have to stop calling the jackass.
Then one day I had an idea.

I dialed his number, then heard his voice say, ''Hello.'' I made up a name. ''Hi. This is the sales office of the Telephone Company and I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with our caller ID program?''

He went, ''No!'' and slammed the phone down.

I quickly called him back and said, ''That's because you're a jackass!''

The reason I took the time to tell you this story, is to show you how if there's ever anything really bothering you, you can do something about it. Just dial 823-4863.

The old lady at the mall really took her time pulling out of the parking space. I didn't think she was ever going to leave.
Finally, her car began to move and she started to very slowly back out of the slot. I backed up a little more to give her plenty of room to pull out. " Great," I thought, she's finally leaving. All of a sudden this black Camaro comes flying up the parking isle in the wrong direction and pulls into her space.

I started honking my horn and yelling, ''You can't just do that, Buddy. I was here first!'' The guy climbed out of his Camaro completely ignoring me. He walked toward the mall as if he didn't even hear me. I thought to myself, "This guy's a jackass.
There sure a lot of jackasses in this world."

I noticed he had a ''For Sale'' sign in the back window of his car. I wrote down the number. Then I hunted for another place to park.

A couple of days later, I'm at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten off the phone after calling 823-4863 and yelling, ''You're a jackass!'' (It's really easy to call him now since I have his number on speed dial.) I noticed the phone number of the guy with the black Camaro lying on my desk and thought I'd better call this guy, too.

After a couple rings someone answered the phone and said, ''Hello.''

I said, ''Is this the man with the black Camaro for sale?''
''Yes, it is.''

''Can you tell me where I can see it?''

''Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th street. It's a yellow house and the car's parked right out front.''

I said, ''What's your name?''

''My name is Don Hansen.''

''When's a good time to catch you, Don?''

''I'm home in the evenings.''

''Listen Don, can I tell you something?''

''Yes.''

''Don, you're a jackass!'' And I slammed the phone down.

After I hung up I added Don Hansen's number to my speed dialer. For a while things seemed to be going better for me. Now when I had a problem I had two jackasses to call. Then, after several months of calling the jackasses and hanging up on them, it just wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be. I gave the problem some serious thought and came up with a solution:

First, I had my phone dial Jackass #1.
A man answered nicely saying, ''Hello.''

I yelled ''You're a jackass!'' but I didn't hang up.

The jackass said, ''Are you still there?''

I said, ''Yeah.''

He said, ''Stop calling me.''

I said, ''No.''

He said, ''What's you name, pal?''

I said, ''Don Hansen.''

He said, ''Where do you live?''

''1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and my black Camaro's parked out front.''

''I'm coming over right now, Don. You'd better start saying your prayers.''

''Yeah, like I'm really scared, Jackass!'' and I hung up.

Then I called Jackass #2. He answered, ''Hello.''

I said, ''Hello, Jackass!''

He said, ''If I ever find out who you are...''

''You'll what?''

''I'll kick your butt.''

''Well, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now Jackass!'' And I hung up.

Then I picked up the phone and called the police. I told them I was at 1802 West 34th Street and that I was going to kill my gay lover as soon as he got home.

Another quick call to Channel 13 about the gang war going on down W. 34th Street.

After that, I climbed into my car and headed over to 34th Street to watch the whole thing. Glorious watching two Jackasses kicking the **** out of each other in front of six squad cars and a police helicopter was one of the greatest experiences of my life!

Name withheld to protect the guilty.