Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

are you saying that you stayed at cedu intentionally?  isn't that a bit sadistic?

i mean here you have your life that they don't
let you live, removed from you is  free will,independent thought, and everything that ever mattered to you, in essence your life is snuffed out, it's like being in a coma.  don't get me wrong, it took me 1 year and 7 months before i finally got out (5 previous escape attempts, making it 6 total), but my goal always remained to get the fuck out of there.  my independent spirit, sense of self preservation, and my fundumental right to something better demanded it. to me staying at cedu was like committing suicide day after day.

how could any of us deny ourselve, what by all rights is ours, and only ours; the right to choose
who we are?

i understand that fear is a real motivator, and if someone truly feared for their life, then i see why they would stay at cedu, but honestly, i never felt that vibe.  did you feel that way? what made you stay?

for me getting out once and for all was the only
option, it was the only way i would truly be alive, i knew that with every fiber of my being.


[ This Message was edited by: SON OF SERBIA on 2004-07-13 08:42 ][ This Message was edited by: SON OF SERBIA on 2004-07-13 08:46 ][ This Message was edited by: SON OF SERBIA on 2004-07-13 08:52 ]

scrubbing pans, obsessive cleaning, chopping wood, shoveling shit, cleaning trails, etc... are not what i would consider learning vocations. these are activities that any idiot with half of a brain can do.  as for running your feelings and the rest of that emotional growth bullshit, none of that has any value in the real world.  business is about sales and profit, period.  nobody gives a shit about your feelings!  why, because feelings are like assholes, everyone has them! mine are no more important than yours.

i can't remeber a time in my life when i felt
more pain, despair, and isolation than my time at cedu.  the one thing i learned from the experience was how to survive, depend on, and think for myself.  i didn't learn that at cedu, i learned that in the 3 and 1/2 months that i spent living on the streets, and hiding from the cops after i finally split from that hellhole.  out there i saw people murdered, i saw people killing themselves (crackheads and junkies), i saw cops beating people within an inch of their lives for sleeping on the wrong street corner.  i saw people beating the shit out of each other over the smallest morsal of food. I never felt more fear in my life. still i would've spent an eternity living that life, than spend one more day at cedu.  

i don't pride myself for surviving my time at cedu, but i take great pride in the strength i found to pull myself out of there. those streets are where i learned the greatest lessons of my life, and that's where i found the tools to make it in this world!