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Topics - Samara

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Open Free for All / Tracking Down People
« on: July 06, 2011, 12:11:25 AM »
Looking for info regarding deceased family. He would be over 100, so I'm sure he's gone.  Everything costs. Any way to track down people free? It's a lost bio line.

--Also, looking for adopted sib. Any way to find? I have sex, approx date (1963-5) and gen county. don't know name or any other info. not looking to upend life... just wondering if there is an open forum.

Any help appreciated.

Feed Your Head / Superbowl Predictions
« on: January 09, 2011, 03:57:24 PM »
Great game last night between NO and Sea. Watching Balty and KC now; we all know how that ends. Hope Packers take it tonight, but ultimately, who do you think the SB match up is gonna be?

I love Boston, but hate Bellichik and don't find his machine team too inspiring. So, I'm pretty happy with whoever kicks their ass. ;)

Addiction Treatment Philosophy / The Rabbit Hole
« on: December 31, 2010, 02:12:42 AM »
I'm sure we've touched on this before, but can't recall exactitudes.

Let's say you have a teen who does not use drugs recreationally or for expansionary purposes.  They are just a straight out out lying stealing wacked out meth head. Now, I am of the opinion that you can't really truly help them unless there is some part of them that wants help. But if one of my kids had a serious life threatening personality altering drug problem - not just the usual curiosity factor - what the hell am I supposed to do? Watch? because that would kill me.

I watched my niece go through bad meth addiction - she was like a different person. She wasn't on it to expand herself, transcend anything, or trip the light fantastic. She wasn't simply a pot head. It fucked up her unborn baby. It fucked her up. It took years to earn any trust back. It changed her fundamentally in a way she will never get back, no matter how long sober now. She went from being unusually innocent and undeveloped for her age to ... forever hardened.

So what do you do? I mean, I can be as involved as I am, as candid as I am, as present and loving... but it's not infallible. I can allow natural consequences to teach them...  I can deal with defiance, oppositionalism, non conformity,experimentation.... but what do you do when they are about to fall over the rabbit hole ... if you are opposed or distrustful of authority or "programs" What do you do when you have a kid who desperately, desperately needs help?

I think of my brother (heroin/homeless for years) and my niece (shot liver at 30). What if it were one of mine?  I am a mother first, foremost, and last... what do you do?

Addiction Treatment Philosophy / CARON
« on: December 31, 2010, 01:50:17 AM »
Anyone know anything about Caron Foundation?  It is a straight treatment center or therapeutic wackery?

Daytop Village / Disgusted
« on: December 30, 2010, 11:04:31 PM »
So a relative by marriage came over who just came back from an event that Monsignor O'Brien attended.  This person tells me O'Brien was there and told him that my relative's grandfather contributed money to start Daytop at O'Brien's request. I am disgusted. My friend seemed proud of this contribution and of course I verbally vomited all over the place.  He asked me: What, you don't think it is good to help teen addicts?

Just disgusted by how much misinformation is out there, and he's looking at me dumbstruck while I talk about therapeutic cults etc. He doesn't get it.  Of course, I could not explain in a linear fashion the methods and culture of therapeutic cults - I was taken by surprise and disgusted by his assumptions they are all intended for the public good. When I explained some of the quackery, he said that maybe it devolved over time, but certainly, Monsigor O' Brien's initial foundation was strong.

Is there any book or article that illustrates the reality of Daytop?

Open Free for All / ED - not spam
« on: December 19, 2010, 11:08:20 PM »
OK you're right, who gives a fuckaroo?

Open Free for All / Sci Fi
« on: December 08, 2010, 02:59:04 PM »
I am trying to get a Sci Fi lit class initiated at my school because many of my students have expressed an interest in it.  I was initiated into Sci Fi under a classic banner: Wells, Huxley, Orwell, Bradbury, Asimov, Vonnegut, etc.... a little Ursula Le Guin.

To Sci Fi Aficionados: Is there anything new and exciting to explore in the world of Sci Fi? I've been out of the loop.

Open Free for All / Survey for class
« on: December 01, 2010, 11:10:58 AM »
I am taking a class for post grad work on interaction.  This week's topic is trite, trivial, and banal, but I am supposed to talk about cross-sex (m-f) friendships and survey various people if it really works. Get a candid perspective, esp from guys. We're not talking FWB's, but true m-f friendships.  I already talked about it to my RL amigos, but I am hoping for more candid info here.

I always thought m-f friendships were possible until I got married and all my close male friends I've had over the years stopped calling.

So: Cross Sex Friendship - Can men and women be friends (real friends, hang out friends, w/o the s-xcomponent)

What are the impediments to cross-sex friendship after 30?

Open Free for All / Lupus
« on: November 10, 2010, 11:23:16 AM »
This is probably the last place I should ask about lupus, but In was wondering if anyone knows anything about it from a "real people" perspective. (Everything sounds alike on web md)

Open Free for All / Paper on verbal and non verbal cue alignment
« on: September 24, 2010, 01:33:11 AM »
Usually, I have no issue finding inspiration for grad school papers. However, one topic the professor assigned is just not hitting for me.

I can talk about non-verbal cues until the cows come home, but this topic is to discuss a time when the verbal communication is not aligned with the non-verbal behaviors. Well, as someone who is profoundly hearing impaired, non verbal cues are my m├ętier... lack of alignment between v and nv is not. Hell, I can't even hear the v.

Any suggestions? I can probably add all sorts of crap from a nugget - just looking for a little inspiration.

Open Free for All / For Laughs
« on: September 15, 2010, 10:37:47 AM » ... ml#s139927

What's your fave?
#1 - Downright creepy.

Open Free for All / The Right to Privacy
« on: June 02, 2010, 12:57:40 AM »
IM/Internet/Facebook/Twitter/Phone cams/24/7 Media/Spycams/Key Trace/Cookies/Online Data collection/TMI and what have you.

Is Privacy a thing of the past? Do I have no right to expect it any more? Do I have no Rights to Privacy? How do I protect it online?

I am a very private person. I lead a pretty boring life. I'm not on drugs, evading taxes, or "Craig's Listing" for World Series tickets. I've never committed a felony, beat someone up, or screwed someone else's husband.

But I want privacy. And its all an illusion now. It's an overmediated life. Any moment could get caught on Candid Cameras everywhere.


I had to warn a co-worker not to "friend" students. She is 12 years younger than I am. A different generation. She thinks I am being paranoid (I know other teachers would not appreciate the students knowing certain info from bitching about the job to their recent bachelorette photos.)

I feel like everyone has access and I don't want it.

Are there things I can do to protect myself?

Should I just get over it and know that the Right to Privacy has ceased to exist?

I am so disgusted by this TMI overly accessible culture, I dream of dropping out, off the grid. (Like I would last long with my tender footed ways. :heartbreak: )

Open Free for All / Vent
« on: May 12, 2010, 10:06:27 PM »
Right now, I am feeling misanthropic and need to vent. I have become slowly disillusioned by my job which I really don't think of as helpful. There is a sense of entitlement and laziness and conformity that makes me ill. My school is charter and publicly funded and we are supposed to be transparent. However, the level of censorship surpasses that of a Christian private school... the board and the CEO apply a lot of illegal political and religious pressure on the employees.  Financially, it is unethical. Admin at our charter school are running for and winning (we have extreme right wing political cronies to help) board seats at our good public schools so they can influence ideology and finances in favor of ours. When people start to ask questions, they are removed. I recently was warned that someone was forced to sign a paper to state that she would never say anything adverse about our school or practices to any person or be fired on the spot. It was because she questioned inefficient and unethical practices. (Is this even legal?)  Her husband was just laid off, so she has no recourse... the economy is bad and it is hard to get a job elsewhere. I am so sickened that they did this, and was only warned by the very frightened person so that I could protect myself. It is all very Big Brother.  People have tried to rebel or send anonymous letters to be summarily fired. Now, people are in dire straights (economy) and can't find other jobs. The funny thing is the people being targeted are intellectuals and ethical. The ones who see initiatives that all for show and don't work. The people running the show and being promoted have breeched every type of fiduciary and ethical code.  Some people have been purposely misrepresented to tarnish their reputations. I am totally sickened and have to support my kids.

But in general, I'm just fed up by the materialism, the lack of discretion, the 24/7 media, the total lack of boundaries... I also live in the most socially hierarchical, classist, ultracrazyconservative town chock full of religious hypocrites. (I've lived in a LOT of places, so I'm not just complaining for no reason. This is the worst. By far.)

I am tired of watching all the power struggles and attempts of social and interpersonal control on a daily basis. I just don't have the stomach for it. I feel like I am too sensitive to it all and I wish I were blind and dumb. Ignorance is bliss. There isn't one part of me that wishes to control or compete with others, and certainly not in a way that is politicized and compulsory and demeaning.

I feel like running off to live in a hut in Timbuktu today. I'm disillusioned with society and cynically view everything as Lord of the Flies.
I hate cynicism.

I know I sound like a paranoid nut job, but I just need to vent now so I don't pull down anyone at work and tomorrow I'll buck up.
Thank you for letting me.

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