Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Hyde Schools => Topic started by: Anonymous on May 07, 2006, 02:02:00 AM
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I have to be at work at 8:45 AM tomorrow morning (well, today in 2 minutes as of now), but after having discovered this forum, I simply cannot sleep without posting.
I'm 18 years old, working a job and graduating high school this month, and I attended Hyde (Bath) as a freshman (2002-2003). Although Hyde helped me in some ways, the ways in which it hurt me greatly outweigh those.
I was 14 years old when I lost my virginity, while I was a student at Hyde. There was a boy, we'll call him *Bob, whom I had a stupid, childish crush on, for whatever reason. *Bob pretty much ignored my existance completely...
until this one day.
I was at the nurse's office trying to get out of Sports, which I did quite often. I hated Sports. I was completely out-of-shape and had huge body-image issues, so nothing in the world to me was more torturous/humiliating than putting on sweats or gym-shorts and running around for two hours in front of a group of my peers. (Typical adolescent stuff, really.) In any event, everyone knew; everyone knew about my "attitude" regarding Sports...and everyone knew I'd do anything to get out of going.
On this particular fall afternoon, I had (once again) decided to go to the nurse's station instead of going back to the dorm to change for Sports...and I was about to walk in, when I noticed *Bob coming up behind me. I turned around, and he said hi to me. Elated that he was even speaking to me, I immediately accepted his invitation to "come skip Sports"... It was all too perfect. (And anyone who's been to Hyde knows that it's not like any normal high school; you can't just "skip" anything... Doing so will usually result in instant 2/4...)
Side by side, we strolled right off the campus and started walking through Bath. I could barely contain my excitement. I tried my best not to let on how excited I was, though I'm sure it was blatently obvious.
We were chatting casually, and we started talking about the Ethics...which ones we agreed with, which ones we thought sucked... Naturally, the first two that came up were drugs and...you guessed it, sex.
When he asked me what I thought about the Sex Ethic, I just shrugged and said, "Oh, yeah. IT SUCKS!" ... I did NOT tell him that I'd never had sex; I'd never even seen a penis... (Obviously, he didn't like the Sex Ethic, and I wanted to impress him, you know, look cool...)
Needless to say, I nearly had a heart attack when he looked me right in the eye and asked, "Wanna break it?"
"Ummmm," came out of my mouth first. I mean, I couldn't believe what was happening; it was so surreal... The day before, this kid wouldn't even LOOK at me (though I'm sure he knew I liked him, everyone did; I wasn't exactly subtle) and now...he was asking me to have SEX with him??!?? ... I made a bunch of incoherent noises (he smiled the whole time) before I managed to sqeuak out, "Yeah! Okay," at which point he informed me that he "knew a place".
So
I followed him to the Waterfront, where he took me to the public restroom. He told me he was going to go in. He told me to wait half a minute, and then go in, too.
He did.
I did.
For a breif second, we just sort of awkwardly stood there, staring at each other, and then before I could say a word, his mouth was covering mine. I remember thinking maybe I didn't like him anymore, because it wasn't a nice, connecting sort of kiss, not at all... He was violently shoving his tongue down my throat. I felt like I was suffocating.
He took off his pants.
He pulled my skirt down,
underwear down,
shirt up.
He pushed me on the floor, which was tile and absolutely freezing. A South Floridian, what I remember most
is how fucking cold that floor was.
No words were spoken.
I kind of wanted him to stop, and I kind of didn't. But I kind of did. Okay, I really did. In any event, I didn't stop him. I let it happen.
And it happened. And he hurt me. It hurt so badly, SO FUCKING BAD. It was the worst pain I have ever felt. (But I suppose, as a female, losing your virginity hurts no matter what.)
I barely got a glimpse of him before it went in. Big, red thing, his penis was. I screamed. He told me to be quiet. But it hurt so, so fucking bad... For the most part, I held back my screams, just kind of whimpered quietly.
At first, I looked up at his face, but it started to scare me, so I turned my head to the side, towards the sink, while he was hurting me
hurting hurting hurting hurting, I started to cry,
and then
it was over.
He was pulling his pants up.
Speechless, I stared at him for a moment,
pulled my skirt up,
underwear up,
shirt down.
As soon as we got out of the bathroom, he spoke. He was telling me not to tell anyone, telling me to swear not to... I agreed not to tell, no matter what. I sweared.
Heading back to Hyde, he began to casually talk about our "cover story", where we could we say we were, what we should say we were doing. I didn't understand how he could go back to talking so casually, like nothing had happened...
My heart was beating fast, and I was still in pain between my legs...
And we were almost back at Hyde when
Mr. Bragg drove by.
He pulled over and told us to get in the car. I let *Bob do all the talking, answer all the questions... He said something about studying, us studying? I stared out the window and kept quiet. I knew if I said anything, everything would come pouring out.
Bragg dropped *Bob at his dorm. Then it was just the two of us in the car, and he asked me again what had happened,
but I said,
"Nothing".
He dropped me off, and
...that was it. He didn't put me or *Bob on 2/4.
He didn't do much of anything.
When I saw Hunter that night after dinner, he'd gone back to ignoring me. Whenever I saw him, I didn't know what to do...
The next day, I told a Senior that me and *Bob had sex... I did NOT tell him what it was like, or that it was my first time... This Senior took me to the nurse's station for a pregnancy test.
Thankfully, I wasn't pregnant... But
I pissed blood into their little, plastic cup. (And I didn't have my period.) The nurse who took it just looked at me and said, "THAT'S NOT NORMAL." (As far as I know, she didn't tell anyone about it.)
Hunter said I was making it up because I'd had a crush on him...which was believable because I actually HAD had a crush on him, and
people knew that... Because they didn't know who was lying, they put us both on 2-4...together.
They'd always seat me right next to him on the bleachers, with only a few feet of air between us. Whenever the proctors weren't watching, I'd beg him to tell the truth, and he'd insult me, call me a stupid bitch, tell me how no one would ever believe me, how I shouldn't have said anything, how I'd gone against my word, how I was a slut, disgusting, no better than the shit beneath his shoe. I would choke back tears. Sometimes I would cry, unable to hold them back. But the moment a proctor turned around, he would be all silent and still as an angel, looking at them, kinda shrugging while I sobbed and shook, sort of like, "See, told you she's crazy!"
And sometimes, when I cried,
he would laugh.
Some people knew the truth, but the majority believed him over me. Every day for the rest of the year, I had to listen to people accuse me of lying. Not only had I been hurt, but I was made to believe I wasn't even good enough TO be hurt in that way; I felt worthless, filthy, subhuman.
Every day for the rest of the year, I had to see his face, take his abuse. Every day for the rest of the year, random people would ask me if it was true.
To this day no one at Hyde knows what really happened, nor do they give a shit.
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Holy shit, I'm unable to edit this, but towards the end...when I said "Hunter", I meant "*Bob". !!! GAHHHH. :scared: :cry2:
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On 2006-05-06 23:02:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I have to be at work at 8:45 AM tomorrow morning (well, today in 2 minutes as of now), but after having discovered this forum, I simply cannot sleep without posting.
I'm 18 years old, working a job and graduating high school this month, and I attended Hyde (Bath) as a freshman (2002-2003). Although Hyde helped me in some ways, the ways in which it hurt me greatly outweigh those.
I was 14 years old when I lost my virginity, while I was a student at Hyde. There was a boy, we'll call him *Bob, whom I had a stupid, childish crush on, for whatever reason. *Bob pretty much ignored my existance completely...
until this one day.
I was at the nurse's office trying to get out of Sports, which I did quite often. I hated Sports. I was completely out-of-shape and had huge body-image issues, so nothing in the world to me was more torturous/humiliating than putting on sweats or gym-shorts and running around for two hours in front of a group of my peers. (Typical adolescent stuff, really.) In any event, everyone knew; everyone knew about my "attitude" regarding Sports...and everyone knew I'd do anything to get out of going.
On this particular fall afternoon, I had (once again) decided to go to the nurse's station instead of going back to the dorm to change for Sports...and I was about to walk in, when I noticed *Bob coming up behind me. I turned around, and he said hi to me. Elated that he was even speaking to me, I immediately accepted his invitation to "come skip Sports"... It was all too perfect. (And anyone who's been to Hyde knows that it's not like any normal high school; you can't just "skip" anything... Doing so will usually result in instant 2/4...)
Side by side, we strolled right off the campus and started walking through Bath. I could barely contain my excitement. I tried my best not to let on how excited I was, though I'm sure it was blatently obvious.
We were chatting casually, and we started talking about the Ethics...which ones we agreed with, which ones we thought sucked... Naturally, the first two that came up were drugs and...you guessed it, sex.
When he asked me what I thought about the Sex Ethic, I just shrugged and said, "Oh, yeah. IT SUCKS!" ... I did NOT tell him that I'd never had sex; I'd never even seen a penis... (Obviously, he didn't like the Sex Ethic, and I wanted to impress him, you know, look cool...)
Needless to say, I nearly had a heart attack when he looked me right in the eye and asked, "Wanna break it?"
"Ummmm," came out of my mouth first. I mean, I couldn't believe what was happening; it was so surreal... The day before, this kid wouldn't even LOOK at me (though I'm sure he knew I liked him, everyone did; I wasn't exactly subtle) and now...he was asking me to have SEX with him??!?? ... I made a bunch of incoherent noises (he smiled the whole time) before I managed to sqeuak out, "Yeah! Okay," at which point he informed me that he "knew a place".
So
I followed him to the Waterfront, where he took me to the public restroom. He told me he was going to go in. He told me to wait half a minute, and then go in, too.
He did.
I did.
For a breif second, we just sort of awkwardly stood there, staring at each other, and then before I could say a word, his mouth was covering mine. I remember thinking maybe I didn't like him anymore, because it wasn't a nice, connecting sort of kiss, not at all... He was violently shoving his tongue down my throat. I felt like I was suffocating.
He took off his pants.
He pulled my skirt down,
underwear down,
shirt up.
He pushed me on the floor, which was tile and absolutely freezing. A South Floridian, what I remember most
is how fucking cold that floor was.
No words were spoken.
I kind of wanted him to stop, and I kind of didn't. But I kind of did. Okay, I really did. In any event, I didn't stop him. I let it happen.
And it happened. And he hurt me. It hurt so badly, SO FUCKING BAD. It was the worst pain I have ever felt. (But I suppose, as a female, losing your virginity hurts no matter what.)
I barely got a glimpse of him before it went in. Big, red thing, his penis was. I screamed. He told me to be quiet. But it hurt so, so fucking bad... For the most part, I held back my screams, just kind of whimpered quietly.
At first, I looked up at his face, but it started to scare me, so I turned my head to the side, towards the sink, while he was hurting me
hurting hurting hurting hurting, I started to cry,
and then
it was over.
He was pulling his pants up.
Speechless, I stared at him for a moment,
pulled my skirt up,
underwear up,
shirt down.
As soon as we got out of the bathroom, he spoke. He was telling me not to tell anyone, telling me to swear not to... I agreed not to tell, no matter what. I sweared.
Heading back to Hyde, he began to casually talk about our "cover story", where we could we say we were, what we should say we were doing. I didn't understand how he could go back to talking so casually, like nothing had happened...
My heart was beating fast, and I was still in pain between my legs...
And we were almost back at Hyde when
Mr. Bragg drove by.
He pulled over and told us to get in the car. I let *Bob do all the talking, answer all the questions... He said something about studying, us studying? I stared out the window and kept quiet. I knew if I said anything, everything would come pouring out.
Bragg dropped *Bob at his dorm. Then it was just the two of us in the car, and he asked me again what had happened,
but I said,
"Nothing".
He dropped me off, and
...that was it. He didn't put me or *Bob on 2/4.
He didn't do much of anything.
When I saw Hunter that night after dinner, he'd gone back to ignoring me. Whenever I saw him, I didn't know what to do...
The next day, I told a Senior that me and *Bob had sex... I did NOT tell him what it was like, or that it was my first time... This Senior took me to the nurse's station for a pregnancy test.
Thankfully, I wasn't pregnant... But
I pissed blood into their little, plastic cup. (And I didn't have my period.) The nurse who took it just looked at me and said, "THAT'S NOT NORMAL." (As far as I know, she didn't tell anyone about it.)
Hunter said I was making it up because I'd had a crush on him...which was believable because I actually HAD had a crush on him, and
people knew that... Because they didn't know who was lying, they put us both on 2-4...together.
They'd always seat me right next to him on the bleachers, with only a few feet of air between us. Whenever the proctors weren't watching, I'd beg him to tell the truth, and he'd insult me, call me a stupid bitch, tell me how no one would ever believe me, how I shouldn't have said anything, how I'd gone against my word, how I was a slut, disgusting, no better than the shit beneath his shoe. I would choke back tears. Sometimes I would cry, unable to hold them back. But the moment a proctor turned around, he would be all silent and still as an angel, looking at them, kinda shrugging while I sobbed and shook, sort of like, "See, told you she's crazy!"
And sometimes, when I cried,
he would laugh.
Some people knew the truth, but the majority believed him over me. Every day for the rest of the year, I had to listen to people accuse me of lying. Not only had I been hurt, but I was made to believe I wasn't even good enough TO be hurt in that way; I felt worthless, filthy, subhuman.
Every day for the rest of the year, I had to see his face, take his abuse. Every day for the rest of the year, random people would ask me if it was true.
To this day no one at Hyde knows what really happened, nor do they give a shit. "
I'm really sorry to hear about the way you were sexually abused at Hyde. This sounds like a terribly painful experience. It also sounds like you learned a lot from the experience, especially about why you were so vulnerable at the time. Your description of the Hyde student who abused you suggests that he is your classic predator. It sounds like he knew you were vulnerable and he took full advantage of that. It sounds like he used you and exploited you the way too many guys do, especially when they figure out that a girl has low self esteem. I hope you don't beat yourself up too much over this.
My child was also recently abused at Hyde. After that experience we decided to pull her out of Hyde. We got the strong impression that Hyde is very good at the blame game and is full of staff who are quick to point fingers at students and parents. We found a few Hyde staff who were understanding, but overall we were horrified by Hyde's insensitivity. During our Hyde experience we ended up meeting quite a few teachers and administrators who were astonishingly judgmental and not supportive. We later learned that many Hyde staff have major problems themselves, which probably explains why they hibernate at that school.
I'm curious to know what you think of Hyde. Does it work for most of the students there? What's good about Hyde? What is bad? Did you meet many Hyde students who came to the school with major mental health problems? Did they get the help they needed there?
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I too am very sorry about your experience at Hyde. I first want to say that I was not thrilled reading all the sexual details of your incident, but I do believe you had a terrible experience losing your virginity to a boy who obviously took advantage of your vulnerability.
Worse than the boy who took advantage of you was the schools reaction. They obviously knew about the talk yet did nothing to protect you or try to stop all the gossip. Interesting how they will go to great lengths for some things, but in other cases where it is warranted to take action, they do nothing.
The only thing I can say to try to make you feel better, is you are not alone. Hyde has humiliated many kids who went through Hyde School and if nothing else I think it has made some of us stronger and more determined to be more sensitive to others in this world. We all learn from our mistakes and you will learn from yours. Unfortunately one of the lessons you had to learn is how cruel people can be even at a school where they teach "character."
The whole idea of this website is to tell our stories both good and bad about Hyde. I think your story shows us that Hyde School is not what they advertise themselves to be. I think it also shows that Hyde is accepting most anyone into their program.
You were humiliated by Hyde and the people who go there. So was I. We have to be grateful that we got out when we did. I can tell you from experience, life goes on. I haven't forgiven or forgot those who hurt me and my family. Guess I could forgive if I felt those responsible were sorry, but at Hyde they think they are G-d and know better than anyone. Don't forget this one important statement......HYDE IS NEVER WRONG!! At least they don't think they are, so in that regard Hyde School will never improve or change.
-
I'm really sorry to hear about the way you were sexually abused at Hyde. This sounds like a terribly painful experience. It also sounds like you learned a lot from the experience, especially about why you were so vulnerable at the time. Your description of the Hyde student who abused you suggests that he is your classic predator. It sounds like he knew you were vulnerable and he took full advantage of that. It sounds like he used you and exploited you the way too many guys do, especially when they figure out that a girl has low self esteem. I hope you don't beat yourself up too much over this.
My child was also recently abused at Hyde. After that experience we decided to pull her out of Hyde. We got the strong impression that Hyde is very good at the blame game and is full of staff who are quick to point fingers at students and parents. We found a few Hyde staff who were understanding, but overall we were horrified by Hyde's insensitivity. During our Hyde experience we ended up meeting quite a few teachers and administrators who were astonishingly judgmental and not supportive. We later learned that many Hyde staff have major problems themselves, which probably explains why they hibernate at that school.
I'm curious to know what you think of Hyde. Does it work for most of the students there? What's good about Hyde? What is bad? Did you meet many Hyde students who came to the school with major mental health problems? Did they get the help they needed there?"
Thank you for your compassion, and I'm glad to hear that you pulled your daughter out.
What I think of Hyde? Wow, that's a hard question; I have, very very strong mixed feelings...
Okay...I can't accurately answer this question without first explaining the situation (or, at least, attempting to)...
I live with my my father because my mom died when I was ten years old. After she died, I didn't deal with it...at all. But post traumatic stress disorder (and what had become a pretty severe depression) finally made themselves apparent when
somewhere around age 12, just after starting 7th grade, I stopped going to school. I would get in horrible, sometimes violent fights with my dad, and I started to develop a pretty bad substance-problem which started with prescription Xanax.
Since I barely went to school, I failed seventh grade (before I was always on honor roll, in all gifted classes), and by the time eighth grade (or at least, what should have been eighth grade for me) rolled around...I wasn't attending school at all. As you probably know, it is illegal to drop out of school before the age of 16 (truancy). A particular guidance counselor at my middle school took interest in me, and, for whatever reason, decided to get involved...
Apparently the law in Florida states that when a minor is so young, it is the parent/gaurdian's responsibility to ensure that the kid is in school. Personally, I think that's pretty unfair; my situation was NOT my father's fault. He did everything he could to try to control me, to try to make me go, but I wouldn't. In any event, this guidance counselor believed he was neglecting me, and wanted to get HRS involved...
If I didn't have my father...
I would have ended up in foster care, and the foster care system here--at least from what I've heard of it, from what I understand--is, to put it lightly, hell. My father HAD to get me into SOME kind of school program, quick, or he was going to lose me... Like I'm sure most parents do, he did a lot of searching, consulted some people, blah blah...and decided on Hyde. I do believe that he wanted the best for me, and Hyde looked the best to him...but
he couldn't afford it... SO
he went to court to get the life-insurance money (left in my name from my mother dying),
to pay for Hyde.
That said...
Hyde put me back on grade level as a freshman. For that, I am extremely thankful.
HOWEVER
Did I get the help I needed? No. At that point in my life, (I can admit now that) I was a pretty disturbed individual. I had no desire to do anything. In the morning, I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to sleep forever, and I physically couldn't sleep at night without six or seven Xanax, minimum.
I needed serious psychological HELP. Instead, I recieved MORE psychological DAMAGE.
At Hyde, I picked up the habit of cutting myself, a practice I learned from fellow students. My reality became even more distorted. I was made to feel inferior. I was isolated, and, at the age of 14 (through 15) utterly ALONE, an object... I did not feel human. The Xanax was taken away cold turkey, with no kind of therapy at all. Food became my replacement for this; at mealtime I would eat as much as possible, because it was all I had to comfort myself, and then I was made to feel inferior/disgusting about my body (mostly BY STAFF); I eventually developed a mild eating-disorder which, chances are, would NOT have developed in a HEALTHIER environment.
Post-traumatic stress? Instead of recovering from that, or even reckognizing that I was suffering from it, I got traumatized again...cold bathroom floor and all the words that followed... Instead of healing, I got fresh wounds. Every day I felt trapped, hopeless, abandoned and misunderstood. Most of my peers (majority of which were rich, much older kids, coming from a totally different culture) looked down on me and abused me. Most of the staff (though one or two did genuilely care/make attempts at helping me without really knowing how) stopped ignoring me ONLY to chastise and humiliate. (My already-unhealthily-low self-esteem became almost non-existant.)
I do believe that (though many succesful Hyde students are simply good actors, caught in a sadomasohistic script)...Hyde does work for some people...the keyword there being "some". There ARE certainly a FEW kids who have actually been helped by it. But that isn't enough to justify the damage it has done (and continues to do) to others, to kids like me. It has taken me years of therapy just to understand and begin to get past this, to be able to write about it now.
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On 2006-05-07 10:28:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I too am very sorry about your experience at Hyde. I first want to say that I was not thrilled reading all the sexual details of your incident, but I do believe you had a terrible experience losing your virginity to a boy who obviously took advantage of your vulnerability.
Worse than the boy who took advantage of you was the schools reaction. They obviously knew about the talk yet did nothing to protect you or try to stop all the gossip. Interesting how they will go to great lengths for some things, but in other cases where it is warranted to take action, they do nothing.
The only thing I can say to try to make you feel better, is you are not alone. Hyde has humiliated many kids who went through Hyde School and if nothing else I think it has made some of us stronger and more determined to be more sensitive to others in this world. We all learn from our mistakes and you will learn from yours. Unfortunately one of the lessons you had to learn is how cruel people can be even at a school where they teach "character."
The whole idea of this website is to tell our stories both good and bad about Hyde. I think your story shows us that Hyde School is not what they advertise themselves to be. I think it also shows that Hyde is accepting most anyone into their program.
You were humiliated by Hyde and the people who go there. So was I. We have to be grateful that we got out when we did. I can tell you from experience, life goes on. I haven't forgiven or forgot those who hurt me and my family. Guess I could forgive if I felt those responsible were sorry, but at Hyde they think they are G-d and know better than anyone. Don't forget this one important statement......HYDE IS NEVER WRONG!! At least they don't think they are, so in that regard Hyde School will never improve or change. "
Thank you; it feels good to know that I am not alone, though at the same time, it is very sad.
I only got out because I knew I had to get out. After a year of running away and cutting myself, I cut my neck and drank a bottle of Robotussin all in the hopes of getting out, getting out, getting out of Hyde at any cost... I got out, but not to the lockdown or mental hospital that Hyde wanted to see me in... I came home to my dad, who gave me the best therapy in the world: being a parent to me, allowing me to have a home again, and actually getting me into intense, frequent outpaitient psychotherapy. And I am so, so thankful. I really am. I know that if I had stayed there any longer, I only would have gotten worse...
You are totally right about Hyde's belief that Hyde is always right.
... I'm sorry to hear that you, too, were humiliated by Hyde,
but I am inspired by the fact that you seemed to have, for the most part, moved on, even though it isn't always possible to forgive entirely.
And I'm sorry if the graphic nature of my story offended you, or just flat-out grossed you out, or whatever. I was writing directly from memory and with raw emotion; I wasn't really thinking about what the people on this board might and might not need to know, which I apologize for. ::blushing::
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And I'm sorry if the graphic nature of my story offended you,
To the contrary I found your story moving. Although I am not a woman, I felt like I could relate to what you were feeling.
Sue Doenym (not my real name)
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On 2006-05-09 14:57:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-07 10:28:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I too am very sorry about your experience at Hyde. I first want to say that I was not thrilled reading all the sexual details of your incident, but I do believe you had a terrible experience losing your virginity to a boy who obviously took advantage of your vulnerability.
Worse than the boy who took advantage of you was the schools reaction. They obviously knew about the talk yet did nothing to protect you or try to stop all the gossip. Interesting how they will go to great lengths for some things, but in other cases where it is warranted to take action, they do nothing.
The only thing I can say to try to make you feel better, is you are not alone. Hyde has humiliated many kids who went through Hyde School and if nothing else I think it has made some of us stronger and more determined to be more sensitive to others in this world. We all learn from our mistakes and you will learn from yours. Unfortunately one of the lessons you had to learn is how cruel people can be even at a school where they teach "character."
The whole idea of this website is to tell our stories both good and bad about Hyde. I think your story shows us that Hyde School is not what they advertise themselves to be. I think it also shows that Hyde is accepting most anyone into their program.
You were humiliated by Hyde and the people who go there. So was I. We have to be grateful that we got out when we did. I can tell you from experience, life goes on. I haven't forgiven or forgot those who hurt me and my family. Guess I could forgive if I felt those responsible were sorry, but at Hyde they think they are G-d and know better than anyone. Don't forget this one important statement......HYDE IS NEVER WRONG!! At least they don't think they are, so in that regard Hyde School will never improve or change. "
Thank you; it feels good to know that I am not alone, though at the same time, it is very sad.
I only got out because I knew I had to get out. After a year of running away and cutting myself, I cut my neck and drank a bottle of Robotussin all in the hopes of getting out, getting out, getting out of Hyde at any cost... I got out, but not to the lockdown or mental hospital that Hyde wanted to see me in... I came home to my dad, who gave me the best therapy in the world: being a parent to me, allowing me to have a home again, and actually getting me into intense, frequent outpaitient psychotherapy. And I am so, so thankful. I really am. I know that if I had stayed there any longer, I only would have gotten worse...
You are totally right about Hyde's belief that Hyde is always right.
... I'm sorry to hear that you, too, were humiliated by Hyde,
but I am inspired by the fact that you seemed to have, for the most part, moved on, even though it isn't always possible to forgive entirely.
And I'm sorry if the graphic nature of my story offended you, or just flat-out grossed you out, or whatever. I was writing directly from memory and with raw emotion; I wasn't really thinking about what the people on this board might and might not need to know, which I apologize for. ::blushing:: "
Hyde would not think I have moved on if I am posting on this board, but I don't really care what Hyde thinks. I will never be able to completely forget what Hyde did without some closure in the form of an apology. They have hurt so many people, both kids and parents in ways that other people outside of Hyde cannot understand. What upsets me the most is the fact that Hyde School never admits when they have wronged a person. They don't know what it is to be humble, even though they try to teach it. They don't know how to be compassionate, even though they ask this of their students. They don't know about honesty or humility even though the expectation is pushed on the students. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree is what comes to my mind, and Hyde ought to take responsibility for the tree that they represent. Students learn from Hyde who replace the parents while at school. If Hyde doesn't set a good example for the students then all the "character building" in the world is not going to change the students.
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On 2006-05-09 14:41:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
I'm really sorry to hear about the way you were sexually abused at Hyde. This sounds like a terribly painful experience. It also sounds like you learned a lot from the experience, especially about why you were so vulnerable at the time. Your description of the Hyde student who abused you suggests that he is your classic predator. It sounds like he knew you were vulnerable and he took full advantage of that. It sounds like he used you and exploited you the way too many guys do, especially when they figure out that a girl has low self esteem. I hope you don't beat yourself up too much over this.
My child was also recently abused at Hyde. After that experience we decided to pull her out of Hyde. We got the strong impression that Hyde is very good at the blame game and is full of staff who are quick to point fingers at students and parents. We found a few Hyde staff who were understanding, but overall we were horrified by Hyde's insensitivity. During our Hyde experience we ended up meeting quite a few teachers and administrators who were astonishingly judgmental and not supportive. We later learned that many Hyde staff have major problems themselves, which probably explains why they hibernate at that school.
I'm curious to know what you think of Hyde. Does it work for most of the students there? What's good about Hyde? What is bad? Did you meet many Hyde students who came to the school with major mental health problems? Did they get the help they needed there?"
Thank you for your compassion, and I'm glad to hear that you pulled your daughter out.
What I think of Hyde? Wow, that's a hard question; I have, very very strong mixed feelings...
Okay...I can't accurately answer this question without first explaining the situation (or, at least, attempting to)...
I live with my my father because my mom died when I was ten years old. After she died, I didn't deal with it...at all. But post traumatic stress disorder (and what had become a pretty severe depression) finally made themselves apparent when
somewhere around age 12, just after starting 7th grade, I stopped going to school. I would get in horrible, sometimes violent fights with my dad, and I started to develop a pretty bad substance-problem which started with prescription Xanax.
Since I barely went to school, I failed seventh grade (before I was always on honor roll, in all gifted classes), and by the time eighth grade (or at least, what should have been eighth grade for me) rolled around...I wasn't attending school at all. As you probably know, it is illegal to drop out of school before the age of 16 (truancy). A particular guidance counselor at my middle school took interest in me, and, for whatever reason, decided to get involved...
Apparently the law in Florida states that when a minor is so young, it is the parent/gaurdian's responsibility to ensure that the kid is in school. Personally, I think that's pretty unfair; my situation was NOT my father's fault. He did everything he could to try to control me, to try to make me go, but I wouldn't. In any event, this guidance counselor believed he was neglecting me, and wanted to get HRS involved...
If I didn't have my father...
I would have ended up in foster care, and the foster care system here--at least from what I've heard of it, from what I understand--is, to put it lightly, hell. My father HAD to get me into SOME kind of school program, quick, or he was going to lose me... Like I'm sure most parents do, he did a lot of searching, consulted some people, blah blah...and decided on Hyde. I do believe that he wanted the best for me, and Hyde looked the best to him...but
he couldn't afford it... SO
he went to court to get the life-insurance money (left in my name from my mother dying),
to pay for Hyde.
That said...
Hyde put me back on grade level as a freshman. For that, I am extremely thankful.
HOWEVER
Did I get the help I needed? No. At that point in my life, (I can admit now that) I was a pretty disturbed individual. I had no desire to do anything. In the morning, I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to sleep forever, and I physically couldn't sleep at night without six or seven Xanax, minimum.
I needed serious psychological HELP. Instead, I recieved MORE psychological DAMAGE.
At Hyde, I picked up the habit of cutting myself, a practice I learned from fellow students. My reality became even more distorted. I was made to feel inferior. I was isolated, and, at the age of 14 (through 15) utterly ALONE, an object... I did not feel human. The Xanax was taken away cold turkey, with no kind of therapy at all. Food became my replacement for this; at mealtime I would eat as much as possible, because it was all I had to comfort myself, and then I was made to feel inferior/disgusting about my body (mostly BY STAFF); I eventually developed a mild eating-disorder which, chances are, would NOT have developed in a HEALTHIER environment.
Post-traumatic stress? Instead of recovering from that, or even reckognizing that I was suffering from it, I got traumatized again...cold bathroom floor and all the words that followed... Instead of healing, I got fresh wounds. Every day I felt trapped, hopeless, abandoned and misunderstood. Most of my peers (majority of which were rich, much older kids, coming from a totally different culture) looked down on me and abused me. Most of the staff (though one or two did genuilely care/make attempts at helping me without really knowing how) stopped ignoring me ONLY to chastise and humiliate. (My already-unhealthily-low self-esteem became almost non-existant.)
I do believe that (though many succesful Hyde students are simply good actors, caught in a sadomasohistic script)...Hyde does work for some people...the keyword there being "some". There ARE certainly a FEW kids who have actually been helped by it. But that isn't enough to justify the damage it has done (and continues to do) to others, to kids like me. It has taken me years of therapy just to understand and begin to get past this, to be able to write about it now.
"
I'm so sorry to hear about how you suffered at Hyde. Your story is so terribly familiar. It sounds like you had quite a traumatic past and went to Hyde with a plate full of emotional struggles. As in so many other students' situations, it sounds like Hyde completely mishandled and mistreated you. Apparently you needed a setting that would have been sensitive to your mental health struggles, family situation, self-destructive instincts, etc. Instead you got the kind of humiliation and degradation that Hyde is famous for. No wonder it took you years to recover from the Hyde trauma. It makes me so sad to read how Hyde contributed to your troubles. As you say, Hyde may help a small percentage of students, but it's clearly a disaster for others who need a very different kind of setting. Your comments on this board are helping other parents who are considering Hyde realize that this school is probably not right for their kids.
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On 2006-05-09 18:06:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-09 14:57:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-07 10:28:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I too am very sorry about your experience at Hyde. I first want to say that I was not thrilled reading all the sexual details of your incident, but I do believe you had a terrible experience losing your virginity to a boy who obviously took advantage of your vulnerability.
Worse than the boy who took advantage of you was the schools reaction. They obviously knew about the talk yet did nothing to protect you or try to stop all the gossip. Interesting how they will go to great lengths for some things, but in other cases where it is warranted to take action, they do nothing.
The only thing I can say to try to make you feel better, is you are not alone. Hyde has humiliated many kids who went through Hyde School and if nothing else I think it has made some of us stronger and more determined to be more sensitive to others in this world. We all learn from our mistakes and you will learn from yours. Unfortunately one of the lessons you had to learn is how cruel people can be even at a school where they teach "character."
The whole idea of this website is to tell our stories both good and bad about Hyde. I think your story shows us that Hyde School is not what they advertise themselves to be. I think it also shows that Hyde is accepting most anyone into their program.
You were humiliated by Hyde and the people who go there. So was I. We have to be grateful that we got out when we did. I can tell you from experience, life goes on. I haven't forgiven or forgot those who hurt me and my family. Guess I could forgive if I felt those responsible were sorry, but at Hyde they think they are G-d and know better than anyone. Don't forget this one important statement......HYDE IS NEVER WRONG!! At least they don't think they are, so in that regard Hyde School will never improve or change. "
Thank you; it feels good to know that I am not alone, though at the same time, it is very sad.
I only got out because I knew I had to get out. After a year of running away and cutting myself, I cut my neck and drank a bottle of Robotussin all in the hopes of getting out, getting out, getting out of Hyde at any cost... I got out, but not to the lockdown or mental hospital that Hyde wanted to see me in... I came home to my dad, who gave me the best therapy in the world: being a parent to me, allowing me to have a home again, and actually getting me into intense, frequent outpaitient psychotherapy. And I am so, so thankful. I really am. I know that if I had stayed there any longer, I only would have gotten worse...
You are totally right about Hyde's belief that Hyde is always right.
... I'm sorry to hear that you, too, were humiliated by Hyde,
but I am inspired by the fact that you seemed to have, for the most part, moved on, even though it isn't always possible to forgive entirely.
And I'm sorry if the graphic nature of my story offended you, or just flat-out grossed you out, or whatever. I was writing directly from memory and with raw emotion; I wasn't really thinking about what the people on this board might and might not need to know, which I apologize for. ::blushing:: "
Hyde would not think I have moved on if I am posting on this board, but I don't really care what Hyde thinks. I will never be able to completely forget what Hyde did without some closure in the form of an apology. They have hurt so many people, both kids and parents in ways that other people outside of Hyde cannot understand. What upsets me the most is the fact that Hyde School never admits when they have wronged a person. They don't know what it is to be humble, even though they try to teach it. They don't know how to be compassionate, even though they ask this of their students. They don't know about honesty or humility even though the expectation is pushed on the students. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree is what comes to my mind, and Hyde ought to take responsibility for the tree that they represent. Students learn from Hyde who replace the parents while at school. If Hyde doesn't set a good example for the students then all the "character building" in the world is not going to change the students."
You've said it beautifully: Hyde is full of contradiction and hypocrisy. They preach one thing and behave differently. Hyde is so smooth and slick in the way it gets parents to fall for its nice sounding slogans about humility, truth, integrity and all that. It sounds great, but the truth is that many people at Hyde behave just the opposite. Thank you for setting the record straight.
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Interesting. The last two replies are within 5 minutes of each other, show the same prose style, and sum up the original post at condemnation of Hyde.
It reminds me of a political hack technque where after the person has spoken in front of the committee or board you say:
"Thank you for appearing here today. What you have said justifies all of my long standing convictions and indites the other side as the spawn of satan."
It is a fairly transparent cheap trick. You agree and give comfort, then stuff you own words in the mouth of the person testifing. As a matter of fact, I have seen that used at hyde! Ed was great at that.
Sue Doenym
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On 2006-05-10 06:56:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Interesting. The last two replies are within 5 minutes of each other, show the same prose style, and sum up the original post at condemnation of Hyde.
It reminds me of a political hack technque where after the person has spoken in front of the committee or board you say:
"Thank you for appearing here today. What you have said justifies all of my long standing convictions and indites the other side as the spawn of satan."
It is a fairly transparent cheap trick. You agree and give comfort, then stuff you own words in the mouth of the person testifing. As a matter of fact, I have seen that used at hyde! Ed was great at that.
Sue Doenym"
I wrote the second post. I haven't the slightest idea who wrote the first post. You can think conspiracy if you want to. However, I know the truth (which Hyde claims to be interested in): these 2 posts were written by 2 different people.
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I think using some ones emotional revelation as a saw to your purpose, is not an afferming experiance for the person sharing. It make you as bad as you say hyde is: Not interested in the person, interested only in your own agenda. Your karma hit your dogma honey.
Sue
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you need spell check in your life.
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I am fine with misspelling words occationally.
" It is a poor mind that can't think of two ways to spell the same word"
Andrew Jackson
Siouxsie D
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I thought of the poor girl tonight who went to Hyde and wrote about loosing her virginity.
On the news was a report about a young girl who traveled from California to DC on a plane to visit her father. There was a young man who was prosecuted for gropping her on the overnight flight! Of course the first question was, "why didn't you scream or let the flight attendant know what was being done to you at the time."
This young girl explained how she went into a state of shock and how she didn't know what to do or how to respond. She was paralized. Once the young man left the seat next to her she told the flight attendant what had happened. The man was arrested and found guilty. There were many passengers who had heard him say previously that he wanted to do sexual things to her.
I don't think a male can understand the panic state of mind this girl went through. It is amazing how some people posted messages saying that if she didn't want it to happen she should have spoken up. This reminded me of the female Hyde student who is posting on this site. Although she did not stop the sexual encounter, she did not want it but didn't know how to respond. This insecure young girl who had a poor self image was taken advantage of by a very secure young man who then tried to make her look like she wanted it.
To the girl who posted, don't blame yourself. If you haven't been able to deal with it, go seek counseling. I feel so badly that your father took your Mother's life insurance money and placed you at a school that was not capable of handling your problems or looking after the well being of the students. The school knew this and needs to take responsibility. Your father should try to plead with the school or the NEASC to get your tuition back. I am sure your Mother would have wanted this money spent on your future not on something wasteful like Hyde.
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so she should get her money back because she always wanted to fool around with this guy and let it happen, before she knew she didn't want to.
Hey I feel really bad for this girl, no one should be taken advantage like that, but is Hyde responsible for this? Go after Hunter *Bob's family!
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On 2006-05-11 03:53:00, Anonymous wrote:
"so she should get her money back because she always wanted to fool around with this guy and let it happen, before she knew she didn't want to.
Hey I feel really bad for this girl, no one should be taken advantage like that, but is Hyde responsible for this? Go after Hunter *Bob's family!"
Hyde should not enroll students who have severe psychological problems unless they have an on site licensed Psychologist, which they don't. Hyde's "one size fits all" is not appropriate and hurts more than it helps. This girl never should have been in a school like Hyde and Hyde never should have accepted her.
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On 2006-05-11 20:56:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-11 03:53:00, Anonymous wrote:
"so she should get her money back because she always wanted to fool around with this guy and let it happen, before she knew she didn't want to.
Hey I feel really bad for this girl, no one should be taken advantage like that, but is Hyde responsible for this? Go after Hunter *Bob's family!"
Hyde should not enroll students who have severe psychological problems unless they have an on site licensed Psychologist, which they don't. Hyde's "one size fits all" is not appropriate and hurts more than it helps. This girl never should have been in a school like Hyde and Hyde never should have accepted her. "
I'm all in favor of adolescents learning how to accept responsibility for their decisions and actions. But, anyone who has ANY close contact with Hyde knows that it is notorious for accepting tons of students who walk in the door with very substantial mental health struggles, diagnoses and challenges (and with Hyde's rumored enrollment problems, the pressure to accept these kids probably increases). No one should be surprised that so many kids have problems like this at Hyde. They're dealing with things like depression, suicidal thoughts, eating disorders, cutting, etc. and Hyde assumes that it's "character education" model is what they need. That's plain naive. Character education, implemented by staff who have proper training and know what they're doing, is a fine model for kids whose problems are mainly character related. But how can you expect all these Hyde students who have major mental health problems to function well at Hyde with its model that is designed for a different kind of kid? I agree wholeheartedly with the person whose post said Hyde never should have accepted this student in the first place. If Hyde wants to accept all these students with major mental health problems, Hyde needs to completely redesign its model, hire a very different kind of staff, and all that so that it can provide these kids with the mental health services they need. Admitting these students to Hyde is a set-up, a disaster waiting to happen.
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I'm all in favor of adolescents learning how to accept responsibility for their decisions and actions. But, anyone who has ANY close contact with Hyde knows that it is notorious for accepting tons of students ......
How many students to the ton? 10? 20?
SD
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On 2006-05-12 11:16:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
I'm all in favor of adolescents learning how to accept responsibility for their decisions and actions. But, anyone who has ANY close contact with Hyde knows that it is notorious for accepting tons of students ......
How many students to the ton? 10? 20?
SD"
Whenever I talk with other Hyde parents I hear story after story about their children's mental health problems and histories. It's a constant, consistent theme. Hyde students without a diagnosis seem to be more the exception than the rule. Is this a scientific survey? No, I'll grant you that. Is the anecdotal evidence, which I've now seen for several years, powerful? Absolutely. Hyde staff themselves admit that the percentage of the student body with mental health diagnoses is substantial and has increased. The fundamental problem is the extraordinarly poor fit between Hyde's model and these students' needs.
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On 2006-05-12 12:05:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-12 11:16:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
I'm all in favor of adolescents learning how to accept responsibility for their decisions and actions. But, anyone who has ANY close contact with Hyde knows that it is notorious for accepting tons of students ......
How many students to the ton? 10? 20?
SD"
Whenever I talk with other Hyde parents I hear story after story about their children's mental health problems and histories. It's a constant, consistent theme. Hyde students without a diagnosis seem to be more the exception than the rule. Is this a scientific survey? No, I'll grant you that. Is the anecdotal evidence, which I've now seen for several years, powerful? Absolutely. Hyde staff themselves admit that the percentage of the student body with mental health diagnoses is substantial and has increased. The fundamental problem is the extraordinarly poor fit between Hyde's model and these students' needs. "
Hydes students are not the only ones who have mental health problems. A huge majority of Hyde staff also have psychological disorders! I agree with the poster above.....Hyde needs to revisit their model
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Famous People Who Have Had Mental Illness
Hans Christian Anderson, Ludwig Von Beethoven, Winston Churchill, Kurt Cobain, Charles Darwin, Emily Dickenson, Thomas Edison, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Betty Ford, Paul Gauguin, King George III, Johan Goethe, Ernest Hemingway, Victor Hugo, Thomas Jefferson, John Keats, Abraham Lincoln, Michelangelo, Florence Nightengale, King Saul, Robert Louis Stevenson, Sir Isaac Newton.
source : http://www.mentalhealth.com/ (http://www.mentalhealth.com/)
In any give population 1 out of five will have mental health issues
source : http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/didyou.cfm (http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/didyou.cfm)
Why did jesus appear 2000 years ago? If he was alive today he would be put on psychotropic meds. If Vincent had popped prozac Starry Night would have been a Keen child on velvet:
http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Sectio ... entID=4858 (http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Helpline1&template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=4858)
"What else should I be?
All apologies
What else should I say?
Everyone is gay."
Kurt
"I'm Crazy"
Willie
Sue
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On 2006-05-13 05:23:00, Anonymous wrote:
" Famous People Who Have Had Mental Illness
Hans Christian Anderson, Ludwig Von Beethoven, Winston Churchill, Kurt Cobain, Charles Darwin, Emily Dickenson, Thomas Edison, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Betty Ford, Paul Gauguin, King George III, Johan Goethe, Ernest Hemingway, Victor Hugo, Thomas Jefferson, John Keats, Abraham Lincoln, Michelangelo, Florence Nightengale, King Saul, Robert Louis Stevenson, Sir Isaac Newton.
source : http://www.mentalhealth.com/ (http://www.mentalhealth.com/)
In any give population 1 out of five will have mental health issues
source : http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/didyou.cfm (http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/didyou.cfm)
Why did jesus appear 2000 years ago? If he was alive today he would be put on psychotropic meds. If Vincent had popped prozac Starry Night would have been a Keen child on velvet:
http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Sectio ... entID=4858 (http://www.nami.org/Template.cfm?Section=Helpline1&template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=4858)
"What else should I be?
All apologies
What else should I say?
Everyone is gay."
Kurt
"I'm Crazy"
Willie
Sue"
And what does all this prove Mr Sue? I don't care if the whole world is crazy. You are missing the point. Hyde describes themselves as a college prep school whose model is based on character. Hyde also sells parents on the idea that if you follow the Hyde process, all will be well! Those of us who went through Hyde know that Hyde sells you a false bill of goods and Hyde cannot help many people no matter how closely you follow the Hyde rules and principles. Instead of accepting 98% of the students who apply, Hyde needs to be more honest with themselves and potential parents and recommend other schools which have the ability and credentials to help.
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my point is that 20% of the us population suffers from some form of mental illness. Many great people were/are mentally ill. What is so great about normal? To quote on of my favorite Canadians: "the trouble with normal is it always gets worse"
G Bernard Shaw rightfully observed that "reasonable men adapt to the world. Unreasonable men expect the world to adapt to them, therefore all progress is made by unreasonable men" As I have said before,a reasonable sane man would not have founded Hyde on the premise that the world of education need to change. Just because you have mental heath issues does not mean you are wrong or unfit for a certain type of work. Funny there was a piece on Winny this morning. They said a reasonable sober man would have concluded that GB was doomed, fortunately Winny was neither of those two. They played the Blood sweet and tears speech. Very moving.
The israel air force pilot training has something on the order of 98% success. They has a scientific sscreening process. The US air force has something on the order of 10%. You meet the basic qualification, you want to give it a shot you get a 1 in ten chance. Very democratic.
So I think that just because people are crazy and your chances are not good is no reason to shoot a process down. That is my point.
SD
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On 2006-05-13 12:00:00, Anonymous wrote:
"my point is that 20% of the us population suffers from some form of mental illness. Many great people were/are mentally ill. What is so great about normal? To quote on of my favorite Canadians: "the trouble with normal is it always gets worse"
G Bernard Shaw rightfully observed that "reasonable men adapt to the world. Unreasonable men expect the world to adapt to them, therefore all progress is made by unreasonable men" As I have said before,a reasonable sane man would not have founded Hyde on the premise that the world of education need to change. Just because you have mental heath issues does not mean you are wrong or unfit for a certain type of work. Funny there was a piece on Winny this morning. They said a reasonable sober man would have concluded that GB was doomed, fortunately Winny was neither of those two. They played the Blood sweet and tears speech. Very moving.
The israel air force pilot training has something on the order of 98% success. They has a scientific sscreening process. The US air force has something on the order of 10%. You meet the basic qualification, you want to give it a shot you get a 1 in ten chance. Very democratic.
So I think that just because people are crazy and your chances are not good is no reason to shoot a process down. That is my point.
SD
"
Let me see if I follow your logic here: I get the impression you're saying that Hyde may work for 10% (or whatever small percentage) of its students, so parents should simply sign their kids up and hope for the best, hoping that they'll end up in the "success" group, even though the odds of success aren't good? Are you really arguing that? If so, that seems incredibly insensitive and arrogant. What you seem to be saying is that parents should take a huge risk, financially and emotionally, and that it's okay that most of them will spend $35,000-40,000 a year to send their kids to Hyde even when Hyde will end up not being a good place for their kids. And that's not to mention the emotional travesty for these families who have to live through what is likely to turn out to be a painful Hyde experience (except for the small percentage who have a good experience). Are you REALLY taking that position?
Our family was mislead by Hyde. We had no idea they accepted so many kids with so many mental health problems and didn't have a trained staff to deal with that. We had no idea so many of Hyde's staff are inexperienced when it comes to the type of student body there.
We wish Hyde had been more honest from the beginning about the way it accepts a huge percentage of applicants, including those who need a very different kind of school. We wish Hyde only accepted the kind of students that are a proper fit for its character education model.
To push your analogy, wouldn't it be much more fair and appropriate (and sensitive) to try to do careful screening at the front end, the way the Israeli Air Force does it? Isn't that the right way to do it for all concerned?
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On 2006-05-13 13:00:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-05-13 12:00:00, Anonymous wrote:
"my point is that 20% of the us population suffers from some form of mental illness. Many great people were/are mentally ill. What is so great about normal? To quote on of my favorite Canadians: "the trouble with normal is it always gets worse"
G Bernard Shaw rightfully observed that "reasonable men adapt to the world. Unreasonable men expect the world to adapt to them, therefore all progress is made by unreasonable men" As I have said before,a reasonable sane man would not have founded Hyde on the premise that the world of education need to change. Just because you have mental heath issues does not mean you are wrong or unfit for a certain type of work. Funny there was a piece on Winny this morning. They said a reasonable sober man would have concluded that GB was doomed, fortunately Winny was neither of those two. They played the Blood sweet and tears speech. Very moving.
The israel air force pilot training has something on the order of 98% success. They has a scientific sscreening process. The US air force has something on the order of 10%. You meet the basic qualification, you want to give it a shot you get a 1 in ten chance. Very democratic.
So I think that just because people are crazy and your chances are not good is no reason to shoot a process down. That is my point.
SD
"
Let me see if I follow your logic here: I get the impression you're saying that Hyde may work for 10% (or whatever small percentage) of its students, so parents should simply sign their kids up and hope for the best, hoping that they'll end up in the "success" group, even though the odds of success aren't good? Are you really arguing that? If so, that seems incredibly insensitive and arrogant. What you seem to be saying is that parents should take a huge risk, financially and emotionally, and that it's okay that most of them will spend $35,000-40,000 a year to send their kids to Hyde even when Hyde will end up not being a good place for their kids. And that's not to mention the emotional travesty for these families who have to live through what is likely to turn out to be a painful Hyde experience (except for the small percentage who have a good experience). Are you REALLY taking that position?
Our family was mislead by Hyde. We had no idea they accepted so many kids with so many mental health problems and didn't have a trained staff to deal with that. We had no idea so many of Hyde's staff are inexperienced when it comes to the type of student body there.
We wish Hyde had been more honest from the beginning about the way it accepts a huge percentage of applicants, including those who need a very different kind of school. We wish Hyde only accepted the kind of students that are a proper fit for its character education model.
To push your analogy, wouldn't it be much more fair and appropriate (and sensitive) to try to do careful screening at the front end, the way the Israeli Air Force does it? Isn't that the right way to do it for all concerned?"
I am not saying what parents should do. I am saying that there may be value to allowing people that may be clinically mentally to ill sort things out. IT will not work for every one it will work for some. Most people with mental illness are never diagnosed or treated. Who is responsible for that? Perhaps you as a parent should bring your child to a mental heath profesional. Some people can pull them selves out of some problems with out medication. Not many but some. I would not advise it If you can it is better then walking around on prozac the rest of your life IMHO.
I have no idea what the success rates are at hyde or how they compare to similar institutions. I was accepting as fact or at least as a premise for futher conjectsure, the assurtion that hyde fails, that is does not address the needs, of many or most of it's students. Based on that I argue that that may not be a bad thing in and of it self. Only one out of ten alchoholics very gets sober. I would not use the statistic as a reason to dissuade some one from attending AA meetings. IF you can find something with a better success rate by all means go for it.
40k is chump change to some of these folks. 20k less that the Audi A6 I saw one parent ferry thier child to an interview in a couple of years back. Bush has been good to the upper classes.
I don't work for Hyde. I would not advise any one to attend. With that said, I would not advise anyone to go to a Red Sox game. I assiduously avoid giving advice, even to my own children, who are pretty well adjusted and never went to hyde.
Go Sox!
SD
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To the person who wrote the original post on this thread: I had an eerily similar experience. My heart goes out to you. Thanks for having the courage to write what you did.
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On 2006-06-01 19:01:00, Anonymous wrote:
"To the person who wrote the original post on this thread: I had an eerily similar experience. My heart goes out to you. Thanks for having the courage to write what you did."
What was your experience at Hyde? How did the school handle it? I hope you're doing okay now.
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I am not willing to share my experience here, but, yes, I am doing okay now. Thanks.
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On 2006-06-02 06:26:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I am not willing to share my experience here, but, yes, I am doing okay now. Thanks."
That's fine, and understanable. Glad to hear you're doing well now.
Can you comment generally on what you think of Hyde as a school and whether it's a good place for teens who are having a rough time at home, in more traditional schools, etc.?
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Hyde fucking rocks!
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On 2006-06-01 19:01:00, Anonymous wrote:
"To the person who wrote the original post on this thread: I had an eerily similar experience. My heart goes out to you. Thanks for having the courage to write what you did."
Confirmed bullshit.
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R.S. is that you?
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I only read the first 3 posts and then the last few posts, but all I have to say is, how can you call that sexual abuse? I mean yeah, I'm sorry it was painful and unpleasant, sex shouldn't be like that. My girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other when we were 16 and it didn't hurt her at all, simply because we were both ready and 100% into it. But that doesn't change the fact that he asked the girl if she wanted to do it, and she consented excitedly, it wasn't until she was on her back on a bathroom floor that she decided she wasn't excited about that anymore. As a guy, it gets very frustrating having to deal with a pendulum like that. One second the girl is all about it, so we're like, hell yea! Let's do this! But then afterwards she decides it wasn't enjoyable to her so suddenly it turns into abuse? Or "taking advantage" of her? Or in some cases, rape? Come on.
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On 2006-07-02 11:25:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I only read the first 3 posts and then the last few posts, but all I have to say is, how can you call that sexual abuse? I mean yeah, I'm sorry it was painful and unpleasant, sex shouldn't be like that. My girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other when we were 16 and it didn't hurt her at all, simply because we were both ready and 100% into it. But that doesn't change the fact that he asked the girl if she wanted to do it, and she consented excitedly, it wasn't until she was on her back on a bathroom floor that she decided she wasn't excited about that anymore. As a guy, it gets very frustrating having to deal with a pendulum like that. One second the girl is all about it, so we're like, hell yea! Let's do this! But then afterwards she decides it wasn't enjoyable to her so suddenly it turns into abuse? Or "taking advantage" of her? Or in some cases, rape? Come on. "
You missed the point. It was about how Hyde handled this sensitive incident.
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I'm afraid YOU missed the point... A neurotic teenage girl with low self-esteem (which could apply to about 60% of young teenage girls) voluntarily has sex with a teenage guy who is a jerk (again, about 60%). When asked about it she lies and says nothing, then blabs it around to be cool and gets caught. Two known, proven liars. One denies it, one admits to it. Both are punished equally.
How does this constitute "sexual abuse", "being humiliated by Hyde", "mistreatment" or "mishandling"? Someone's got a twisted agenda here and should get on with their life and stop wallowing in blaming Hyde for their unhappiness. That would be a more direct road to emotional stability...
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On 2006-07-03 07:23:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I'm afraid YOU missed the point... A neurotic teenage girl with low self-esteem (which could apply to about 60% of young teenage girls) voluntarily has sex with a teenage guy who is a jerk (again, about 60%). When asked about it she lies and says nothing, then blabs it around to be cool and gets caught. Two known, proven liars. One denies it, one admits to it. Both are punished equally.
How does this constitute "sexual abuse", "being humiliated by Hyde", "mistreatment" or "mishandling"? Someone's got a twisted agenda here and should get on with their life and stop wallowing in blaming Hyde for their unhappiness. That would be a more direct road to emotional stability..."
So, Hyde had no responsibility to oversee what was going on with 2, 16 year olds on their campus? By your own admission this girl had issues. Hyde's population is mostly kids with issues. Don't you think in an environment like this there should be a PROFESSIONAL on campus to deal with some of these issues?
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Obviously, you're not a parent, as you seem to live in a fantasy world where children are watched 24-7 by a PROFESSIONAL. I don't see where a PROFESSIONAL would have made a difference here. At some point people (including teenagers) need to begin to take responsibility for their lives. That's one of the primary thrusts of Hyde. There will be steps, falls and stumbles along the way, and they can either be a learning experience or one of many stumbles along the road of life. In this case, it was probably one of many stumbles this girl made and will continue to make. But to blame Hyde for it is ludicrous...
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On 2006-07-04 13:08:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Obviously, you're not a parent, as you seem to live in a fantasy world where children are watched 24-7 by a PROFESSIONAL.
B-b-b-b-b-but, isn't that what these parents are PAYING FOR????? Jesus fucking christ!! Make up your minds.
Typical! When the kids do well all the credit goes to Hyde. If they fuck up it's automatically "It ain't OUR fault, you got a fucked up kid". :roll: :roll:
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On 2006-07-04 13:39:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 13:08:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Obviously, you're not a parent, as you seem to live in a fantasy world where children are watched 24-7 by a PROFESSIONAL.
B-b-b-b-b-but, isn't that what these parents are PAYING FOR????? Jesus fucking christ!! Make up your minds.
Typical! When the kids do well all the credit goes to Hyde. If they fuck up it's automatically "It ain't OUR fault, you got a fucked up kid". :roll: :roll: "
I get a kick out of this other poster. He is saying that a teenage should be fully responsible for all in his life. Why do you think most laws do not allow kids to drive until 16? Why can kids not drink until 21? Duhhh, maybe because many of them are too young and immature to make responsible decisions? I love the way this poster thinks that Hyde's indoctrination is so wonderful. Yeah, I guess exposing young kids to the garbage they hear in these seminars is normal. While I was there at the age of 15 I heard everthing from parents having sexual problems, to a kid threatening his parents with death. That really did me a lot of good along with all the other dysfunctional idiots I was exposed to!
Could you please tell me what good it does a kid to expose him to people like this? I remember a time when a parent talked about finding one of their parents hanging in the basement dead from a suicide!! Do you think this does not impact a 15 year old kid? If I say this was abusive the Hyde Fan will make fun of it, but no one can tell me that this is not a form of child abuse. I am traumatized from spending the six months I did at Hyde.
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Oy Vey!
You people are ridiculous!
Two teens walked OFF campus and had sex and then lied about it.
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On 2006-07-04 20:30:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 13:39:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 13:08:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Obviously, you're not a parent, as you seem to live in a fantasy world where children are watched 24-7 by a PROFESSIONAL.
B-b-b-b-b-but, isn't that what these parents are PAYING FOR????? Jesus fucking christ!! Make up your minds.
Typical! When the kids do well all the credit goes to Hyde. If they fuck up it's automatically "It ain't OUR fault, you got a fucked up kid". :roll: :roll: "
I get a kick out of this other poster. He is saying that a teenage should be fully responsible for all in his life. Why do you think most laws do not allow kids to drive until 16? Why can kids not drink until 21? Duhhh, maybe because many of them are too young and immature to make responsible decisions? I love the way this poster thinks that Hyde's indoctrination is so wonderful. Yeah, I guess exposing young kids to the garbage they hear in these seminars is normal. While I was there at the age of 15 I heard everthing from parents having sexual problems, to a kid threatening his parents with death. That really did me a lot of good along with all the other dysfunctional idiots I was exposed to!
Could you please tell me what good it does a kid to expose him to people like this? I remember a time when a parent talked about finding one of their parents hanging in the basement dead from a suicide!! Do you think this does not impact a 15 year old kid? If I say this was abusive the Hyde Fan will make fun of it, but no one can tell me that this is not a form of child abuse. I am traumatized from spending the six months I did at Hyde."
I also had a horrible experience during many seminars during my year at Hyde. I don't think the idea of the seminars is bad. Of course everyone should take a good look at their own issues. What I couldn't believe was all of the personal information I was hearing about horrible family history, things like sexual abuse, marital affairs, child abuse, domestic violence, sex change operations, and drug addiction. Everyone, and I mean everyone, feels pressure during the Hyde seminars to divulge all this stuff. Doesn't Hyde realize you should talk about this kind of stuff with professional therapists? Does it really make sense to disclose all this kind of painful detail with all the strangers you're just meeting for the first time? Do you think it really makes sense to talk about all this stuff in a seminar that's led by your own history or math teacher who, by the way, isn't exactly trained to handle this kind of discussion? I can't believe anyone let's this continue at Hyde. I think it is very abusive and harmful.
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On 2006-07-05 07:02:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Oy Vey!
You people are ridiculous!
Two teens walked OFF campus and had sex and then lied about it. "
http://www.coolnurse.com/consent.htm (http://www.coolnurse.com/consent.htm)
It should be noted that Maine like some other states has an age differencial built in. While it is legal for two 16 year olds to have sex, it is not legal for a 27 year old man to have sex with a 16 year old girl. Also many of these state laws are hetro based that is to say, it is illegal to engage in homosexual sodomy at any age.
So what these to people did is as legal as buying a fish sandwich at that fish shack next to route one. But for Gods sake a public rest room. Come on. Take a walk in the woods.
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On 2006-07-05 09:04:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 20:30:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 13:39:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2006-07-04 13:08:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Obviously, you're not a parent, as you seem to live in a fantasy world where children are watched 24-7 by a PROFESSIONAL.
B-b-b-b-b-but, isn't that what these parents are PAYING FOR????? Jesus fucking christ!! Make up your minds.
Typical! When the kids do well all the credit goes to Hyde. If they fuck up it's automatically "It ain't OUR fault, you got a fucked up kid". :roll: :roll: "
I get a kick out of this other poster. He is saying that a teenage should be fully responsible for all in his life. Why do you think most laws do not allow kids to drive until 16? Why can kids not drink until 21? Duhhh, maybe because many of them are too young and immature to make responsible decisions? I love the way this poster thinks that Hyde's indoctrination is so wonderful. Yeah, I guess exposing young kids to the garbage they hear in these seminars is normal. While I was there at the age of 15 I heard everthing from parents having sexual problems, to a kid threatening his parents with death. That really did me a lot of good along with all the other dysfunctional idiots I was exposed to!
Could you please tell me what good it does a kid to expose him to people like this? I remember a time when a parent talked about finding one of their parents hanging in the basement dead from a suicide!! Do you think this does not impact a 15 year old kid? If I say this was abusive the Hyde Fan will make fun of it, but no one can tell me that this is not a form of child abuse. I am traumatized from spending the six months I did at Hyde."
I also had a horrible experience during many seminars during my year at Hyde. I don't think the idea of the seminars is bad. Of course everyone should take a good look at their own issues. What I couldn't believe was all of the personal information I was hearing about horrible family history, things like sexual abuse, marital affairs, child abuse, domestic violence, sex change operations, and drug addiction. Everyone, and I mean everyone, feels pressure during the Hyde seminars to divulge all this stuff. Doesn't Hyde realize you should talk about this kind of stuff with professional therapists? Does it really make sense to disclose all this kind of painful detail with all the strangers you're just meeting for the first time? Do you think it really makes sense to talk about all this stuff in a seminar that's led by your own history or math teacher who, by the way, isn't exactly trained to handle this kind of discussion? I can't believe anyone let's this continue at Hyde. I think it is very abusive and harmful. "
The worst part of this is that all of this talk is being done in front of kids!! Totally inappropriate!
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Oy Vey!
You people are ridiculous!
Two teens walked OFF campus and had sex and then lied about it.
::troll:: :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :roll:
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excuse me for the informal writing, it's 3:30 in the morning, so bear with me...i'm going to be a senior and it's going to be my 4th year. i have seen good and bad. good from hyde's perspective and good that hyde hasn't recognized. the sterotypical "tool"(what most kids would call the 100% good guys are the ones Hyde will usually praise, yes, and still challenge. i've seen a kid i went to summer challenge with eventually graduate dirty. yes. but I was able to see the IMMENSE positive change he made. he realized to take his life seriously. M.D. was the classic "bad boy" and still looks like the really cool really tough guy. but he's a good kid now. he always was, but he learned some responsibility. for him, that's really all he needed. i've seen "bad" kids come in, refuse; and then refuse a year and a half into it. those kids are a waste of our time, the parents' money. i've seen good kids, such as myself, who've never done anything bad, learn to be less oblivious and also learn that not all of the current youth culture's bad. like, that drinking a little at a party isn't nearly the end of the world. i've gotten a lot out of hyde cuz i put a lot of faith and trust into it. granted, i DID NOT wanna be there during SC '03 and the beginning of freshman year. but i see that hyde is a place to develop yourself, but whatever it needs to be. not necessarily what hyde thinks it should be. whether or not hyde recognizes that you accomplished something doesn't matter. YES THERE ARE FLAWS! but nothing's perfect. i see that there IS a business perspective; hey, someone's gotta pay the bills to keep the place actually open. i worked in the admissions office for three weeks this summer...i noticed we, at least the woodstock campus, has begun to be more selective and not letting people who aren't ready for us in. which is good. i encourage you look at the school, regardless of the stories, it really depends on your kid. maybe he/she needs something more extreme. like elan, or family foundation(although, they may wanna kill themselves after F.F.). or wilderness. or rehab. hyde is a GREAT transition school from one of those, because they are 1) more willing to go to something less strict and 2) if they did the other program right, then they'll be more willing to continue the change they've been making. it's TOTALLY TRUE that hyde's NOT FOR EVERYONE. but you never know till you at least look. but i know that the common thing with teens today is lack of self-confidence, self-worth, or immaturity. usually a good combination. i was all three. what keeps me coming back are the PEOPLE and the staff. so i'm really tired, but PLEASE, if you have any questions, i'll answer them. i see myself as a completely neutral, seeing as i see them all from both sides. My name is Billy Procida...my email address is [email protected]. And good luck with however YOU raise your children. but it's late, and i gotta sleep :)
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excuse me for the informal writing, it's 3:30 in the morning, so bear with me...i'm going to be a senior and it's going to be my 4th year. i have seen good and bad. good from hyde's perspective and good that hyde hasn't recognized. the sterotypical "tool"(what most kids would call the 100% good guys are the ones Hyde will usually praise, yes, and still challenge. i've seen a kid i went to summer challenge with eventually graduate dirty. yes. but I was able to see the IMMENSE positive change he made. he realized to take his life seriously. M.D. was the classic "bad boy" and still looks like the really cool really tough guy. but he's a good kid now. he always was, but he learned some responsibility. for him, that's really all he needed. i've seen "bad" kids come in, refuse; and then refuse a year and a half into it. those kids are a waste of our time, the parents' money. i've seen good kids, such as myself, who've never done anything bad, learn to be less oblivious and also learn that not all of the current youth culture's bad. like, that drinking a little at a party isn't nearly the end of the world. i've gotten a lot out of hyde cuz i put a lot of faith and trust into it. granted, i DID NOT wanna be there during SC '03 and the beginning of freshman year. but i see that hyde is a place to develop yourself, but whatever it needs to be. not necessarily what hyde thinks it should be. whether or not hyde recognizes that you accomplished something doesn't matter. YES THERE ARE FLAWS! but nothing's perfect. i see that there IS a business perspective; hey, someone's gotta pay the bills to keep the place actually open. i worked in the admissions office for three weeks this summer...i noticed we, at least the woodstock campus, has begun to be more selective and not letting people who aren't ready for us in. which is good. i encourage you look at the school, regardless of the stories, it really depends on your kid. maybe he/she needs something more extreme. like elan, or family foundation(although, they may wanna kill themselves after F.F.). or wilderness. or rehab. hyde is a GREAT transition school from one of those, because they are 1) more willing to go to something less strict and 2) if they did the other program right, then they'll be more willing to continue the change they've been making. it's TOTALLY TRUE that hyde's NOT FOR EVERYONE. but you never know till you at least look. but i know that the common thing with teens today is lack of self-confidence, self-worth, or immaturity. usually a good combination. i was all three. what keeps me coming back are the PEOPLE and the staff. so i'm really tired, but PLEASE, if you have any questions, i'll answer them. i see myself as a completely neutral, seeing as i see them all from both sides. My name is Billy Procida...my email address is [email protected]. And good luck with however YOU raise your children. but it's late, and i gotta sleep :)
Thanks for your comments. I'm glad to know things have worked out well for you at Hyde. Also, I appreciate your willingness to answer questions about Hyde. Since you were asked to work in the admissions office I imagine you're one of the "on track" kids at Hyde who has invested himself. That's great that Hyde was comfortable having you meet parents and students, show them around, etc.. When I was at Hyde I definitely saw some kids who were like you, but not too many..
I also saw the "other" side of Hyde. I met many students who, in my opinion, never should have gone to Hyde and were often "off track," on 2-4, sent to outpost, ran away, etc.. They had serious psychiatric problems or drug/alc problems, but Hyde took them anyway. I definitely met students there who needed treatment, not Hyde. I could never understand why Hyde acceptd these students when it didn't have anyone on staff to counsel them.
I now get questions from parents who are thinking about Hyde and know I was there. In my honest opinion, the good at Hyde (which you experienced and benefited from) does not outweigh the bad. I tell parents they should look for a school that cares about values, character, and all the good stuff, but that doesn't have Hyde's problems. Hyde tells everyone it's about character education, which is true. Character education the way Hyde does it seems to work for a certain kind of student (you seem to be an example), but it seems to fail with many students because they need something real different from what Hyde offers (usually related to their mental health/drug/alc problems).
I also had a big problem with some of the seminars, which seemed an awful lot like group therapy at times. What bothered me is that it wasn't unusual for people to "break down" in those groups or "lose it," but no one with professional training was there to handle that stuff. I saw some really bad incidents.
Here are my questions for you:
* How many of students were in your entering class (2003)? How many graduated?
* How has Hyde changed its admission standards? You said they're being more selective. How?
* What percentage of Hyde's current students seem to have pretty serious mental health/psychiatric problems? Drug/alc problems? Has that changed since you started at Hyde?
* Did you witness any bad incidents in seminars (FLCs) or was it all good? Did you think the staff had the proper training to handle those groups, especially when things got real intense?
* How much turnover is there with teachers these days? When I was at Hyde the turnover was real high.
* Is Joe Gauld still very involved? What's your experience with him?
Thanks for posting.
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Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humilate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
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Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
-
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde. Reading your post brought those feelings back. Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar. I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face. But the truth remains: I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.
The school lied to me. The school lied to the other students about me. The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately. The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable. I was abandoned by all my friends.
I had problems with depression before this all happened. Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression. I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations. I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.
It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started. Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.
This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.
-
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde. Reading your post brought those feelings back. Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar. I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face. But the truth remains: I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.
The school lied to me. The school lied to the other students about me. The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately. The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable. I was abandoned by all my friends.
I had problems with depression before this all happened. Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression. I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations. I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.
It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started. Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.
This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.
I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde. What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.). I'm getting a strong sense that there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience. This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone. Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence. Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.
I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.
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This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone. Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence. Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.
Yes, thank you. Very much so on both points.
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Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde. Reading your post brought those feelings back. Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar. I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face. But the truth remains: I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.
The school lied to me. The school lied to the other students about me. The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately. The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable. I was abandoned by all my friends.
I had problems with depression before this all happened. Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression. I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations. I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.
It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started. Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.
This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.
I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde. What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.). I'm getting a strong sense that there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience. This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone. Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence. Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.
I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.
The Brother's Keeper piece takes on an unhealthy "Lord of the Flies" aspect at times. I saw some things that were unjust that were consented to by the community. One that comes to mind is two seniors caught in concentual sex. Male graduates. Female labeled a "slut" Sound familiar?
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Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that
I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.
All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE, STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything. It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.
But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.
....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde. Reading your post brought those feelings back. Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar. I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face. But the truth remains: I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.
The school lied to me. The school lied to the other students about me. The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately. The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable. I was abandoned by all my friends.
I had problems with depression before this all happened. Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression. I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations. I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.
It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started. Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.
This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.
I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde. What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.). I'm getting a strong sense that there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience. This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone. Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence. Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.
I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.
The Brother's Keeper piece takes on an unhealthy "Lord of the Flies" aspect at times. I saw some things that were unjust that were consented to by the community. One that comes to mind is two seniors caught in concentual sex. Male graduates. Female labeled a "slut" Sound familiar?
Not to mention that with Brother's Keeper (at least Hyde's version of it), I often saw the proverbial pot calling the kettle black. Still more evidence of Hyde's very special, and pathetic, brand of hypocrisy.
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to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
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to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
That was really nice of you, Billy. And that was really nice of your friend, too. I can only hope that the OP is stopping back from time to time and will find in your words some validation of her experience. Hopefully, Mr. Bragg will take note of the trauma he was somehow involved in, even if in no other capacity than being the one who picked up the pair en route back to school.
It is very therapeutic to share one's experiences, both good and bad, and I am sure this site has enabled many to start on a path of recovery and/or realization vis a vie their time at Hyde. For many, but not all, "bashing Hyde" is a necessary and life-affirming part of that process.
Unfortunately, it is impossible to delve into this site even but superficially without coming to the inescapable conclusion that something is very awry in the way Hyde chooses to effect "character education." This thread alone details story after story of unbelievably painful life-changing traumas. I seriously doubt that there are not countless others that haven't been aired yet. And on top of the trauma, as unbelievably bad as the incidents in and of themselves undoubtedly are, there is an additional shitload of prolonged torture and character assassination that Hyde not only participates in, but revels in, as an inherent part of the "character development" process. This makes my blood boil.
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to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
Part of the original post.......
If I didn't have my father...
I would have ended up in foster care, and the foster care system here--at least from what I've heard of it, from what I understand--is, to put it lightly, hell. My father HAD to get me into SOME kind of school program, quick, or he was going to lose me... Like I'm sure most parents do, he did a lot of searching, consulted some people, blah blah...and decided on Hyde. I do believe that he wanted the best for me, and Hyde looked the best to him...but
he couldn't afford it... SO
he went to court to get the life-insurance money (left in my name from my mother dying),
to pay for Hyde.
That said...
Hyde put me back on grade level as a freshman. For that, I am extremely thankful.
HOWEVER
Did I get the help I needed? No. At that point in my life, (I can admit now that) I was a pretty disturbed individual. I had no desire to do anything. In the morning, I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to sleep forever, and I physically couldn't sleep at night without six or seven Xanax, minimum.
I needed serious psychological HELP. Instead, I recieved MORE psychological DAMAGE.
At Hyde, I picked up the habit of cutting myself, a practice I learned from fellow students. My reality became even more distorted. I was made to feel inferior. I was isolated, and, at the age of 14 (through 15) utterly ALONE, an object... I did not feel human. The Xanax was taken away cold turkey, with no kind of therapy at all. Food became my replacement for this; at mealtime I would eat as much as possible, because it was all I had to comfort myself, and then I was made to feel inferior/disgusting about my body (mostly BY STAFF); I eventually developed a mild eating-disorder which, chances are, would NOT have developed in a HEALTHIER environment.
Post-traumatic stress? Instead of recovering from that, or even reckognizing that I was suffering from it, I got traumatized again...cold bathroom floor and all the words that followed... Instead of healing, I got fresh wounds. Every day I felt trapped, hopeless, abandoned and misunderstood. Most of my peers (majority of which were rich, much older kids, coming from a totally different culture) looked down on me and abused me. Most of the staff (though one or two did genuilely care/make attempts at helping me without really knowing how) stopped ignoring me ONLY to chastise and humiliate. (My already-unhealthily-low self-esteem became almost non-existant.)
I do believe that (though many succesful Hyde students are simply good actors, caught in a sadomasohistic script)...Hyde does work for some people...the keyword there being "some". There ARE certainly a FEW kids who have actually been helped by it. But that isn't enough to justify the damage it has done (and continues to do) to others, to kids like me. It has taken me years of therapy just to understand and begin to get past this, to be able to write about it now.
To the "Guest" who originally posted her trauma at Hyde,
I want to tell you how sad I feel for you and how much I can relate to this. I would like to correspond with you in a "private message" if that is ok. I think that maybe we can help each other. I get the feeling you don't know how to set up a way to do this. You need to sign up for a name. You do not have to use your name. You can call yourself whatever you want. No one will be able to get in touch with you outside of this board. You can check for private messages whenever you want to sign in.
You did NOTHING WRONG at Hyde. You were innocent, naive and a part of you wanted and needed the attention you thought you would get from this guy who took advantage of you. You then were made to feel shame. The shame is with Hyde for accepting you into their program to begin with. For knowing your father had to take your trust money to pay for this so called character school. This is not your father's fault. Hyde told us that they could help our daughters self esteem and instead they destroyed it. It is great that you are writing about your experiences here for the sake of other girls who might be considering Hyde and come to this board. Unfortunately I don't have high hopes that Hyde will try to change. They have never taken responsibility for the wrongs they commit.
PLEASE sign up for a name on this board so I can then private message you.
As far as Billy, thank you for bringing this to the attention of the person at Hyde who had something to do with this. I hope he doesn't come back to you and just slander the poor girl which would be typical of Hyde. Point is that Hyde has emotionally damaged many people. Whether these people already had problems or not is not the point. It is wrong to take in kids who need psychological counseling and put them in Hyde's seminars. It is downright dangerous and detrimental to them.
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to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
Billy, I hope you take this the way it is meant, with concern. Contacting Mr Bragg was great. He should know the affect he had on somebody. You say you don't like the "whole battling out atmosphere on this sit" and that it is therapeutic to share your experiences.
Let me share my thoughts with you on the above. I too was damaged by Hyde. I do not come to this board to find therapy. I go to a well qualified therapist for this. I come to this board to get support from others who have experienced similar problems at Hyde. It validates what happened to me and helps me get this off of my chest. Hyde destroyed parts of me by pretending to do their own therapy with seminars and FLC's. You are very lucky that you don't seem to need Hyde for the same reasons we did. Hyde gave hurt some of us through shame and humiliation and tried to control us through 2-4 and negative reinforcement. This might work on some, but doesn't on others including myself. Hyde needs to know this and maybe you are the one who can accomplish this. My worry is that hyde does not care. In your post you mention that you wish other people could tell their stories like this girl did without bashing hyde. Go back and look at her story again. She did bash Hyde. She pointed out how poorly Hyde handled the entire situation and how they foster an astmosphere where the whole year this girl was ragged on. I know you are very pro hyde and i am glad you enjoy being there, but for some of us hyde was very damaging. if you don't like to hear this i am sorry, but we are telling the truth.
I hope you continue to come to this board because you seem to be sincere, but i think that people need to say whatever they feel like saying in order to help them through their post hyde years. If I thought that hyde wanted to be different i would sit down with them tomorrow and give them my thoughts, but hyde has never shown they want to change or be better. they have their own little AA type of program and this is how they want to stay
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hyde mishandles many situations. so do many other schools and institutions and people in general. i don't consider it bashing to say hyde mishandled a particular situation. i think it's bashing when they start saying "hyde mishandles ALL situations or MOST" when they haven't checked to see if that's true. so i don't consider her bashing hyde. mr. bragg didn't come back to anyone. i didn't even get a response. he really didn't do anything. he only picked them up to give 'em a lift back to campus so they didn't have to walk. but he's the only person i can contact that is mentioned by name in the post, and i felt that someone should know. same with that other kid from bath. i've shown some facutly that particular post to show that there is something to be learned from this site. but no one's going to listen the way a majority of posts are worded on this site. people like ursus discredit what some people like this original poster say. any hyde faculty will speak to you. over the phone or through email. but they have made it clear they're not going to waste their time posting on a forum board. and if you were to talk to them on the phone, there's a proper way to go about things. not calling up yelling and cursing (which has happened). make yourself respectable to listen to. some of ya'll here do. some really don't. and the latter discredit the former. trust me, my school has its demons. so do many other, all other, institutions. and i think hyde admins can learn something from some of you. but it's ya'll's presentation. there's also somethign ya'll can learn from me. because, at least for woodstock, things have changed in the way thigns operate down here then from last year, 5 years ago, 10 years ago. it's an evolving place. help be part of the change. because some of you jsut come here and bitch and moan, and that doesn't do anyone any good.
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some of you jsut come here and bitch and moan, and that doesn't do anyone any good.
We like it.
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some of you jsut come here and bitch and moan, and that doesn't do anyone any good.
We like it.
...and it does us good.
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people like ursus discredit what some people like this original poster say.
Curious choice of words, Billy. Not quite sure I get what you mean. Care to explain it to me? Also not quite sure I understand how you or anyone else at Hyde, for that matter, feels it is within your realm to pass judgment as to what should or should not be discussed here, hmm? Fornits isn't exactly an ancillary part of Hyde's Continuing Ed program.
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people like ursus discredit what some people like this original poster say.
Curious choice of words, Billy. Not quite sure I get what you mean. Care to explain it to me? Also not quite sure I understand how you or anyone else at Hyde, for that matter, feels it is within your realm to pass judgment as to what should or should not be discussed here, hmm? Fornits isn't exactly an ancillary part of Hyde's Continuing Ed program.
There is an idea: distance learning character education taught by former Hyde students.
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::roflmao:: ::roflmao:: ::roflmao:: ::deal::
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to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
Billy, I hope you take this the way it is meant, with concern. Contacting Mr Bragg was great. He should know the affect he had on somebody. You say you don't like the "whole battling out atmosphere on this sit" and that it is therapeutic to share your experiences.
Let me share my thoughts with you on the above. I too was damaged by Hyde. I do not come to this board to find therapy. I go to a well qualified therapist for this. I come to this board to get support from others who have experienced similar problems at Hyde. It validates what happened to me and helps me get this off of my chest. Hyde destroyed parts of me by pretending to do their own therapy with seminars and FLC's. You are very lucky that you don't seem to need Hyde for the same reasons we did. Hyde gave hurt some of us through shame and humiliation and tried to control us through 2-4 and negative reinforcement. This might work on some, but doesn't on others including myself. Hyde needs to know this and maybe you are the one who can accomplish this. My worry is that hyde does not care. In your post you mention that you wish other people could tell their stories like this girl did without bashing hyde. Go back and look at her story again. She did bash Hyde. She pointed out how poorly Hyde handled the entire situation and how they foster an astmosphere where the whole year this girl was ragged on. I know you are very pro hyde and i am glad you enjoy being there, but for some of us hyde was very damaging. if you don't like to hear this i am sorry, but we are telling the truth.
I hope you continue to come to this board because you seem to be sincere, but i think that people need to say whatever they feel like saying in order to help them through their post hyde years. If I thought that hyde wanted to be different i would sit down with them tomorrow and give them my thoughts, but hyde has never shown they want to change or be better. they have their own little AA type of program and this is how they want to stay
I am amazed by the clear pattern in some of the posts on this board. There are quite a few people posting here who attended Hyde at different times and campuses. What they have in common are horrific reports of maltreatment by Hyde staff. It's obvious that a number of Hyde students suffer from terribly painful trauma histories and emotional issues; Hyde's pathetic ways of dealing with these students is an abomination and has exacerbated these students' suffering. I have heard story after story of deeply scarred Hyde students who have suffered mightily because of Hyde's obvious negligence and emotional abuse.
The clear impression I get is that Hyde either has no clue that it's so abusive and negligent, or knows it and doesn't care. Either way, Hyde has no business -- none -- serving teenagers who are vulnerable to serious emotional issues.
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The clear impression I get is that Hyde either has no clue that it's so abusive and negligent, or knows it and doesn't care. Either way, Hyde has no business -- none -- serving teenagers who are vulnerable to serious emotional issues.
Hmm... I guess I kinda assumed most, if not all, teenagers were vulnerable as per experiencing "serious emotional issues" inherently by definition... Perhaps Gauld&Co. are targeting the wrong audience.
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this kind of shit was still happening in 2021, with rape, literally in the dorms. Same exact kind of shit and shaming and the woman being accused of lying. Fucking disgusting.