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Messages - hurrikayne

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I'm trying to help your defenseless child.  I have BEEN through a religious cultlike troubled teen institution.  I know what I have SEEN, FELT, and HEARD.  I write about these experiences in an effort to get through to people who HAVE NO CLUE what goes on behind locked, closed, barred and alarmed windows and doors.

Read this, you might Michelle Sutton's story of particular interest.  Her mom sent her to a therapeutic boarding school in order to boost her self-confidence after a date rape.  Her little girl never came home.  I can get you in touch with the mother if you'd like.

(Edited to include the link.)

Quote from: "Guest"
Not necessarily RTC. Boarding school with a therapeutic element. Problem here is not only at school, but in the community...

Jesus, talk about taking the kid out of the frying pan and shoving her into the fire.  Have you read what any of us has been through in these places?  Not only does the girl risk being bullied by the other kids, but by staff as well.  This is dangerous territory, it can break a girl EASILY; particularly one who isn't strong willed in the first place.

Sadly, in far too many cases with DV, it is only when the victim decides she's had enough that a stop can be put to it.  If she's not ready, it's as if she's completely blind to it.  I've seen women bring their little kids to court hoping that will sway the judge in favor of giving the abuser a lighter sentence.  Then they're back in court a few weeks later.  (In IL charges can be brought by police & other agencies even if the victim is uncooperative.)  Women will come in bruised black & blue, to plead for their guy to be released etc...

Actually, if you can get her to a battered women's shelter for a look around at what others have been through, there's a slim chance that could work.  It's very slim....but may be worth the effort.  Particularly if former victims would be willing to talk to her.

Open Free for All / Re: Tibetan Orphanage Volunteer experience
« on: June 11, 2009, 10:17:27 AM »
Che, can you get me some more information on the Tibetan orphans?  Location, pictures of the orphanage, pictures of the kids maybe?  I'll talk to my Girl Scouts, maybe we can get together some school supplies and primary kids books, Cat in the Hat kind of stuff, pencils, notebooks, and ship out to you...

Open Free for All / Re: Just got released.
« on: June 08, 2009, 07:06:06 PM »
Thanks for passing along this information:  
Quote from: "trauma"
join CAFTEY's Trauma and Recovery group on facebook and get a referral to a good therapist that specializes in trauma and institutionalized abuse.  If you still feel you were abused, contact CAFETY for your file that documents steps not taken by CPS and the licensing state agency.

Psy, can you sticky that?  Others may find that information helpful.

Quote from: "Guest"
Who knows... you might be a Christian, and not even know it. This quiz is interesting... and it only works if you're honest. ... Matic.aspx

Ooooooooooh, I'm an Orthodox Quaker & didn't even realize it.  :P

Open Free for All / Re: Just got released.
« on: May 29, 2009, 10:57:31 PM »
Quote from: "beccabbyx"
I went back to my dads house and a new school.  I lived with my mom previously.  and trust me, i've smoked more than a few bowls.  considering offing myself though, shit never changes.

If you consider your life as linear and you spend just under 20 years with your parents, if you only live until you are sixty that is less than a third of your life, if you live to be 80 it is less than a fourth.  You have the power to change EVERYTHING after that period of time, you can live 2/3 or more of your life the way YOU want to live it.  You are very near to the point where you can make the changes that you want.  Hold on, you can do it.  You've made it this far and you are so very close.  Don't lose sight of the finish line.  

In ten years you'll be amazed at how far you've come.  In 15 years, this time right now will be all but a faded memory.  In 20 years, you'll look back on your accomplishments and be astounded that you felt like your life was so bleak.  Your parents may not ever change, but YOU can.  (Mine never have, and I live far from them.)

Actually, I thought this thread might produce a little more serious consideration than it has.  Possibly because I've been around "Christians" of all types for most of my life.

When I was around 6 my mother became a Christian.  She dragged me to every kind of church imaginable, looking for the "right" one.  She felt the Pentacostal crowd was as close as she was going to get to what she wanted, but not before she'd dragged me into Baptist, Methodist, Catholic, and even a church out of a guy's home.  

I've seen all kinds of Christians, believe me.  There are, of course the Christians that only darken the doors of the church for weddings, funerals and the Christmas and Easter services (my grandfather was one of those).  Many are "Sunday Christians"; the only way you'd recognize them as Christian at all, is that they show up to church on Sundays.  There are some really nice Christians, my grandmother was a Methodist, I cannot think of a single bad thing my grandmother ever did (aside from swatting my butt once, but it certainly wasn't abusive and likely was merited).  There are the "Look At Me" Christians; they wander around with their Bibles, mention their church activity a lot and don't really do much work, even AT work.  There are also the "If You Don't Believe What I Believe You Are Going To Hell" Christians; pretty self-explanatory, many of them are Baptists.  There are the "Bible Thumpers" as well, always handy with a scripture reference for EVERY occurrance in life; these are the sort that are very concerned about everone elses souls being in peril for the slightest of deviations from the strictest laws handed down in the Bible, my parents qualify for this one.

The question of course, was "What kind of Christian are you?"  I'm more of a every other week attendee, I don't believe I have to sit in every service held.  I try not to be judgemental of other people, but sometimes I fail.  I try to be a good person and always do the right thing, again, sometimes I fail.  I am human, after all.  When I fail, I ask God for forgiveness and try to move on.

I know of someone who might be able to help you.  I've sent an E-mail to the address you provided.  Good luck!

Quote from: "Melanie"
If you call yourselves a "survivor" of the Rebekah Homes, and your determined for your voice to be heard once and for all, why do you all seem  ashamed or afraid to leave your name?
Why so mysterious? Don't you want people to take you serious? What or who are you hiding from?
God Bless,

Many of us visited here as guests prior to creating a username.  Fornits has a long history of non-censorship.  Some people have taken advantage of this and harassed others.  Some of us are not interested in that sort of complication.  In other platforms, people have attempted to present themselves as survivors, when in fact they were reporters or budding authors and just wanted to write about our experiences.  There are multitudes of reasons.  Just because I do not divulge my name initially to someone that at first glance appears to be hostile, doesn't mean I will not ever, it simply means I prefer to be cautious.

Facility Question and Answers / Re: Roloffs
« on: May 08, 2009, 12:45:58 AM »
Quote from: "Anchor X"
Bro. Roloff was killed in "82, so If you were there in '82-'85 what happen to you was not the way Bro. Rolloff would have wanted the homes to be ran. He would have NEVER put up with that.

I really must interject here, that THAT is precisely the point.  When Lester Roloff died, those who took over lost sight of his ideals.  He was a hard man, yes.  He was strict, was tough, and by today's standards even abusive himself, but not to the level that those who came after his death were.  

Just because your experience, or my experience was better or worse than someone elses does not mean they are lying, it means they went through something we did not.  If someone else went through an experience worse than yours, count yourself extremely lucky, if they had an easier time, thank God for them, maybe they couldn't have handled it as well as you handled your experience.  

I know enough survivors of the Homes to know that some of us are a little cracked around the edges because of the experience, some are cracked clean through, and others seem to have come through with grace and poise DESPITE the horrors they were subjected to.  We are all made different, we all have different perspectives, however, we all deserve the respect to tell our sides, without condemnation from someone else whose experience differed.

I'm quite sure Brother Roloff would not have wanted Faye Cameron to duct tape a girls hands & feet & leave her in lock-up in that condition, but she did it, the state of Texas documented it and she isn't allowed to be inside any facility which provides care to children in the state.  Google it.

Quote from: "Mitt Romney"
Forget the parents (or at least put them on the back burner), try to convince, educate and target the education consultants.  They are the ones with the power.  Yes they are getting paid, but they are not all evil people.  They are just in denial, trying to make extra money or just don’t want to hear it.  You need to figure out a way to sway them, get in their face without pissing them off... maybe one program at a time.

Mitt's on to something here, but don't forget the JUDGES as well, perhaps if more of them were informed...they wouldn't be so hasty to put kids into these places.

The Troubled Teen Industry / Re: Rocklyn Academy(Canada)
« on: May 03, 2009, 06:31:40 PM »
Guest -- would you mind contacting me privately?  Perhaps we could work on an article for the front page of Fornits from your point of view.  It can be completely confidential.  E-mail me at [email protected].  Ginger, Psy and numerous others will vouch for my discretion, if you should like to inquire.  If we can deter one parent from making similar mistakes, perhaps we can do one child great favors.  Perhaps more.

Quote from: "Guest"
Our enrollment form was slightly different. It asked for parental approval for them to send our child to a wilderness program should they deem it necessary.It should have been a huge red flag. There was a form for permission to access her medical records. They never did as far as we can tell. Its apparent they could have cared less what the issues were-they just want the numbers. I can confirm-if you leave early, you are stuck paying the entire shot, despite their reassurances otherwise. If your child enrolls in December for instance, you have to pay until the next December-a full year. After a few weeks it was quite apparent they were incompetent and dangerous. We lost a year of salary, paying for a place that not only didn't help, but caused significant trauma, damage and was unsafe.

We were stupid. We thought that because the Ministry of Ed awarded credits, that the place was supervised, lisenced and had medical support. Dr. Darryl Williams is not a medical dr. They take advantage of desperate parents, and the fact the system here is so lacking in services.

The add on expenses were horrendous. Since they seem to make excuses why our dd needed to have supervised calls home-they would bill us for a therapist to sit in on those calls.

Need to know how to contact you.

The Troubled Teen Industry / Re: Is my mom's punishment ok?
« on: April 27, 2009, 04:28:52 PM »
Okay, for the sake of argument, let us assume it is the Who.  What is the result of the question?  It got everyone thinking and talking about the scenario.  

If it is NOT the Who?  Well then, we've enlightened someone that the scenario portrayed definitely is NOT okay.  

And no one was harmed in the asking, or responding of said questionable scenario.  

Have a nice day!

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