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Topics - starry-eyed pirate

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Feed Your Head / fornits posters rule
« on: January 18, 2011, 05:06:48 PM »
Fornits posters are the best people ever.  Figuring it out.  So many mothafuka' throw shit at c' get down to it.

Tribute. O0  :poison:  O0  :peace:  :poison:

I thought this thread might cast some light.  Synanon's "Game" was the foundation of $tr8.


Namaste.  :poison:  :peace:

The Seed Discussion Forum / Questions about Arthur R. Barker and the Seed
« on: January 03, 2011, 01:55:38 AM »
I am curious about Art Barker.  I don't really know too much about him.  I was in $tr8 in the mid 80s and am trying to trace the various lines of influence.  I wonder how far he was into his AA recovery when he founded the Seed.  I wonder how a man like Barker secures a 1 million dollar start-up grant from congress.  What became of him after the Seed closed ??  As far as I know the Seed only operated for 6 years or something like that.  What do you know about him ??  I am interested in knowing more about Art Barker and the roots of the Seed.


The Troubled Teen Industry / Where did "the game" come from ?
« on: January 01, 2011, 01:56:22 PM »
I am trying to piece it all together...(as always)...and am currently wondering how Chuck Dederich came up with the game.  Was it something he came up with on his own or was he somehow influenced by what the North Koreans were doing to captured U.N. prisoners during the Korean war ?  What is the connection ??  Was Dederich a vet or did he know any returning vets who told him of their experience ??  How did this idea travel from N. Korea to southern CA ??


Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / some recent observations
« on: December 04, 2010, 08:14:22 PM »
In one of the news reports about KIDS they refer to Miller Newton as a doctor of anthropology.  Is that true ??  I don' know but prolly so. It's funny how that's what I study too.  What is anthropology ??  Isn't it the study of the way that people socialize  ??

I checked with my 10 pound dictionary and it says anthropology is the science that deals with human beings and especially with their physical characteristics, origin and distribution into races, environmental and social relations and culture.

That is wild to me because that is the very interest that has guided most of my life.  The Anarchist and the Institution.  They have to exist together.

I see the social dynamic that nurtured the group throughout the society.  Straight wasn't an aberration it was the general pattern in it's most basic and obvious form.  When I see that picture of those poor Indian kids at the Carlisle Indian school, you know that famous heartbreaking picture of those poor kids with their hair cut and their identities missing ??  When I look at that picture, I see the same thing that I see when I look at my own lifetime of experience and particularly the experience I had in $tr8 Incorporated.  Ever'body on the rez.

Weird how the relationship we had with the group became the primary relationship in our lives.  The most important thing in our lives and if we weren't sharing our feelings with group we thought we would go back to drugs and die.  And I was talkin with a friend who reminded me of the urgency with which we needed to share.  As if our lives depended on it and in the brainwash it did.  The is the kind of thing that in the end is a mal-adaption to the greater society.  It creates a social crisis in situations where an urgency to share feelings is completely inappropriate or simply foolish.  Everything about $tr8 was mal-adaptive.  It only served the interests of the status quo establishment.  They want slaves.

I've recently learned that right before they put me in $tr8 there were all kinds of rumors flying around about me that completely over-exaggerated my drug use.  The father of some girl I didn't even know very well and can barely remember now apparently called my mother and threatened my life and told her I was running a drug ring.  This idiot was employed by the CIA. I wasn't even dealing pot or anything and never had.  I was just smokin it with friends, daily at school or when we'd skip class.  There are various other examples I could site of my parents projecting their fears onto me.  Man they were just completely out of it.

I have no respect left for authority or the system or the law or "my elders" or God or any of it.  It's all about the money, no matter what they tell you, it's all about the money and all my childhood intuition has proven itself accurate.

We're all trapped in the program to one degree or another.  If your participating in the world economy your motivating. Namaste.

 :clown:  :poison:  :peace:

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Social coping mechanisms(revised)
« on: May 01, 2010, 01:56:23 PM »
I don't know, but I just figured out how hard it is to live in a society without the right social coping mechanisms.  It's taken me all this long while to see the foreign patterns, of my mind, with any clarity.

Hmmm.  "Behavior modification"  ??

The way the program systematically stripped anyone who entered the program of all their defense mechanisms.  Their social coping mechanisms.  Their ways to deal with the harshness of the world.  These SCM are the results of many years of intention, practice, culture and experience by the individual who owns them, or you might say: who is attached to them.  Some SCM are visible and some not.  The program could not tolerate any SCMs and as a matter of course rooted out all SCMs amongst it's group members(stubborn and willful kid).  Only after that, could the otherwise stubborn and willful kid(group member) be made to give up his ground in a forced retreat, such as occurred in $tr8 Inc.  I have seen all kinds of kids have their SCMs mocked, made fun of, and generally brutally demeaned by staff and the group.  But these SCMs are completely natural and necessary social adaptations in a world that can at any time become brutal and cold.  So any 1st phaser or newcomer(stubborn willful kid, group member) exhibiting any SCMs could not advance, and anytime anyone, higher phaser or newcomer was stood up to talk about something, if they showed any sign of bein weak or exhibiting any SCMs they were confronted, and told to change their behavior.  

Say for example,  there's a rap and it's in the present part of the rap, so all the sad, shameful past has already been talked about, and some 3rd phaser gets stood up and asked by staff to talk about whatever(a 5th phaser has a concern about you){LOL!}...ah! but anyway, if the third phaser say hitches his pants a few times while he's talkin, that could lead to another place for the program to grab a hold, another place for the program to put down some roots and get more into you.  I know, cause they would look for any little personal habit you might have as a way in and if you showed any sign of not being completely open and vulnerable you were attacked for it.  The little things that people do, that give them their personality.  You couldn't have your personality in $tr8.  You couldn't have your own ways.  You couldn't socially cope.  And they controlled every aspect of the environment.  They monitored and punished or rewarded each and every group members behavior accordingly and they made every effort to detach us from any way we had to defend ourselves.  They purposefully stripped us of the very skills we would need the most over the course of our whole lives.  It's pretty bad when your 19 years old and you're supposed to be out on your own, keepin a job and payin your rent when you don't even understand how to behave appropriately in those situations.    

And then this is compounded by everyone around you askin you whats wrong and why can't you keep a job, etc.? and you know there is something wrong and it's the program but you can't see anything and you have no way to look at it, let alone tell someone what's wrong.  This leads to a desperate life.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Remembering Glenn Steepleton
« on: March 30, 2010, 11:13:14 PM »
I turned my neck to see a moppy-headed kid with black curly hair bein introduced to the group.  Not that big but tough lookin in a real respectable way.  If I recall correctly, he wore a preppy shirt that didn't suit him and had noticeable brown eyes.  It's so long ago now, I have trouble remembering, but seems he was some trouble at some point but eventually went along as ever'one 'cep' a few i know done.  He come in a little while after me.  didn't matter though on account 'a' my resistance so we ended up sharin a lot a time.  He took me with him down to the James river, that's down southern VA. with somebody else, I aint sure I remember right, but it was our 4th phase 3 day trip or whatever..."permission".  We drove down to his folks house in Woodbridge and got our gear together.  I think his Dad drove us in some ol suburban or somethin.  Dark blue truck.  We went south out inta the ol VA countryside and down inta the mountains.  We finally made it to Eagle Rock, where Glenn's grandparents lived.  His grandad was missin a part of his thumb.  Eagle Rock was a small town in a small valley surrounded by steep appalachian mountains.  That afternoon the humidity rose sharply, the air was wet, and that night a big ol thunderstorm rolled in. The next day we walked in the James river for miles.  Just got right in it and walked right down it with all our clothes on.  at one point we came across 3 hill-billies a-bathin in the river.  One of em was a naked woman.  we just looked and didn't say nothin. we walked under a big iron bridge that day on the James river.  We walked right down the middle of the waist deep and easy goin river.  Under bridges and around bends, huntin crayfish an such in the shallows...That was an adventure for us.  You're missed Glenn.

I never knew him when he was on staff.  I knew him for a little while when we were both "7-steppers", before he was on staff, though we were both dating female staff members.

I thought he was tough.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / what is...anyway...
« on: January 06, 2010, 01:00:18 AM »
...because when you think about it, it seems like a lack of character to me, if people have the opportunity to try and enrich their perspective, even chemically, but don't take the chance, because they've been pressured to believe it could be bad for them in some make them stupid or delusional or confused or something.  I mean you have to have some discretion in life...that's true, but if you just believe what your told...(I just shake my head in silence then)

If you have the opportunity to get high and be part of any kind of a drum circle don't believe the cops or the judge or any of the "straight"-anti-drug people.  They are all mostly just so far removed from the way of things that they have to pretend or be destroyed.

You can altar the way your senses perceive the world, and when you do what your sense tell you is still true and real.  I think people who insist that things like smoking marijuana can only be bad are just reactionary fools.  Because even if it's not your thing, you should still just be cool and let people live.  Marijuana is a teacher.  People who deny it's value are ignorant.  Peace.

Let It Bleed / Clown House productions presents...
« on: January 05, 2010, 09:28:38 AM »

This is the great local show I toldja 'bout Frod.  I try to catch it every Saturday night at midnight.  Last Saturday's feature was "Werewolf In the Girls Dormitory"(1961?)

Remember your first days in the program, before you understood what they were talking about, with the feelings and everything  ??  I was in there about 3 weeks when I was called on to talk about my past.  I stood up and began to talk about some incident.  I exaggerated my shame and guilt and even tried to cry(sorry to disappoint, it's not easy to write) for the group, but I was confronted and accused of pushin out feelins or something and the staff told me I better get in touch with my feelings or something and I sat down and felt a ton of pressure and more forsaken and alone than I ever had until then.  

What occurs to me now is the extreme pressure you were kept under in the hope that you would not only conform but also become "aware".  The pressure to correctly analyze and articulate in specific words your deepest thoughts and emotions. If you were inspecific you would be told about it by some group member or staff and encouraged to put your general abstract thoughts into very specific words, which you could then be manipulated with.

There was a time before $tr8 when I was not so "aware" in words or "in my head" in words, as it were.  But since $tr8 I've never left my head for long again.  I mean, I was aware before $tr8 too, I always have been able to feel things; strong intuition.  But I was never very articulate about the feelings, I just knew what they meant.  I can remember when my consciousness shifted and I understood the $tr8 trip.  It was sometime after I was returned from my 1st cop-out.  So maybe I was there 3 months or so when I developed the ability to articulate the program mind back to the group.  And I was good enough at it that from then on I avoided unexpected confrontation from the group.  I became "aware".  remember that ??  Do you remember when your mind changed and you could speak the language sincerely ??

That was a major development in my life.  Most people out in the world don't function in such a conscious state.  It's not practical.  But with the words came beliefs and new illusions to confuse and distract.  I really did turn inward about 3 months in and I've since had to deal with it.  $tr8 turned me inward to "search myself" for what they wanted.  I was under constant duress until I learned to think and speak in the way of the program.  I had to develop the ability to dissect my own most inward beliefs and trace the root of my every conscious thought and know what to call it in order to avoid the group's wrath.  I became adept over time.

What am I gettin at ...??  I'm not sure...but there is something in the way they made you confess your mind to them.  The way they made you put it all into very specific words, they made you aware of yourself.  Even if the program was misguided, the principals they applied were real.  The way they trained you to focus on what you felt and how to articulate it.  That was the transformation.  The essence of the cult.  Some doors of perception, once opened can never be closed again.  Or is that the Chronic PTSD ??  

Do you remember when you became overly obsessed with articulating the inner workings of your own psychology ??  Do you know what I'm talkin about ??  See what I'm sayin ??

Sting sings ..."...With words they try to jail ya..."...  Right on Sting, says I.

Ugh.  Such is life.... ::)...

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / too much criticism...
« on: November 25, 2009, 01:27:13 PM »
...can cause a person to fear failure and failure is an indespensable part of life.  It enables us to learn.  The criticism in $tr8 was relentless.  Fear of failure; fear of criticism, fear of abuse, paralyzes a man when he should act.  

...Relentless is putting it mildly...ruthless.

that kind of abuse just kills the spirit; makes one want to disappear, be invisible.

had to post it.  Peace.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / How you couldn't really "fake it"
« on: November 11, 2009, 02:25:05 AM »
...The second you pretended to go along with the program; the minute you decided to "fake it" until you could run, you made yourself open and vulnerable to brainwash.  As soon as you began to just pretend you took the fatal sip.

Open Free for All / Halloween, these days...
« on: November 03, 2009, 10:04:25 PM »
...just aint what it used to be.  Around here it's over before dark!  The doorbell first rings about 5 and the street is empty again by 6:30pm !  Some Halloween.  I feel sorry for these kids.  I guess it all became too real with all the kidnappings in the media and those old horror stories about candy-apples with razor blades in them and what-not.  Most of the kids these days are accompanied by an adult or 2.  What a drag!  No room for a kid to have any real adventure!  They don't know what they're missin though.

When I was a lad we stayed out til 10pm or later trick or treatin and we went with our friends or siblings and didn't have to have our parents hold our hand through the whole thing.  What passes for Halloween these days is a hollow shell of the Halloween I knew and loved.  And some stuff went down, like the time my friend got his bag 'a' candy stolen by that older kid, and there was a fist fight but the kid got the candy and took off runnin.  That sucked but we were out on our own trick or treatin late at night.  And I reckon it would really suck to bite down on a razor blade or consume poison candy or somethin but just seems like that pro'ly only ever happened to few unfortunate kids.    

I think Halloween is a microcosm for what's happened to America.  It's a lot less fun and a whole lot tamer than it used to be, the kids don't even notice how domesticated they've all become.

Everyone's afraid and they'd rather have security than adventure.

Open Free for All / "My" whatever...
« on: September 13, 2009, 12:58:23 PM »
Why does everything have to be "mine" ??  What's up with the "my" dvr, "my" music, "my"(your state here). "My" this and "my" that.  I'm sick of it.  It just sounds bratty and exclusive and ego-centric.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / County Fair
« on: August 22, 2009, 10:10:15 PM »
What's up on a Saturday night ??

I went out to the county fair with my daughter.  Ate a corndog and watched the people while we sat in the shade, on a bench near farmer Hunt's cows.  We know farmer Hunt.  We drive by his farm all the time.  Actually we drive right thru it.  Anyway we sat on the bench talkin about stuff and laughin.  Wonderin what some people must be thinkin...

Gettin ready to throw some vinyl on.  The kid and I heard "Brandy"(by Lookin Glass) on the radio on the way to the fair, then, when we got home I played it for her again.  That was my Mom's favorite song.

I love the fair.  I love where I live. Western Pennsylvania. We live hard. We have fun.

'Ave a good one :poison:  :peace:

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