Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum

Moral Inventories

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A friend in FL:
Hi everyone, A couple of weeks ago I was going through my dusty closet and found an old black sachel. It was full of my Moral Inventories from 1974-75.  I began reading through them and found them very disturbing. What I found that most disturbing was that the "parroting" I did in the raps extended into my own journaling.  It is true that our inventories were read by our Oldcomers. However, I do not think that I was just "preaching to the choir".  I was beleiving the garbage. It is very sad when something that is so close to a diary in nature, is a collection of myths. I was unable to be true to myself.

GregFL:
Welcome to our site.  A good friend of mine called me the other night and was reading one of his moral inventories to me from day 265. It was full of committment and praise for the seed and for the self work and determination he needed to exhibit.

The problem? The Seed had left Cincinatti at about day 185. He was still a lost indoctrinated 14 year old, but alas, his cult had packed up and left him to his own devices with just a few other local Cinci seedlings.   The seed's impact on us was greater than  people imagine.

I hated Moral inventories. Many of mine, from sheer exhaustion, would start off fine but soon trail off in a snake line line as I feel asleep while trying to write. I knew my father and step mother were reading them and that it was a window into my private mind, so I fought to just throw seed lingo and garbage down. Of course, at certain times, when the tug of the cult was strong, I believed and wrote down my innermost thoughts for others to see.

Even my mind was stolen for that period of time in my life.

Welcome again. Do I know you???

A friend in FL:
Hi Greg, My experience at the Seed was in Ft. Lauderdale in '74.  My name is Cheryl.
While I'm online I'd like to thank you for playing an especially important role on this site. I find, as I am sure many others do, your input as a sorce of encouragement-Frieda's as well. Thanks!

Anonymous:
Thanks, Cheryl. Moderating this forum has been a great experience for me. Ginger had been bugging me for about a year to do it, and one day I asked her to add the seed discussion forum to fornits. I didn't know what to expect. One of the hinderences to the growth of the board has been how hard it is to find it. If you type "the seed" into a browser, you get 1/2 million or so links to Seed distributors and other links. The only real way to find it is to type "art barker the seed".

That being said, I am very happy about the direction this site has taken. Us ex- seedlings tend to be a little older and a little less bitter than the straight survivors, but part of that is, in addition to our advancing age,  our experience was slightly different  (but less so than some imagine).

Tell us a little about your experience in that Hot, bug infested, kooky  compound down on SR 84. I am particularly interested in stories about Art & Co.

I visited there twice, once while in the seed and the other time shortly after graduating. My sister and I showed up in our Seed t-shirts all ready for a hero's welcome, and what we got was interrogated, a quick introduction to the group, and a bum's shuffle out the door. It was a little bewildering at the time, but in retrospect, expected behavior for the paranoid nut cases in charge.

The place  was essentially similar to St Petersburg with the exception of more Art Barker. We had the "Art Barker lite" version of the program as he only showed up once or twice a week to lead a rap or inspect the place.

Anyway, it's nappy time...tell us a story!

kosmonaut:
I've still got a notebook full of them.  None of it makes any sense.  It's just jargon.

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