Mission Mountain School

[Anonymous]

I went to mission mountain school, and though I am off drugs now, I'd have to say the thought of that place makes me cringe now. I feel I was constantly being told that I would never succeed and that I was a burden to the school. Well, I am proud to say that I did not graduate from that school, and still havn't touched drugs for nearly 3 years. I'm sure it did great things for people, but I gaurantee that there will be emotional issues in every student that goes there that will caused solely by thier experiences at MMS. The question is really, are the ends worth the means? or better yet, isn't there a way to get off drugs and clear up emotional issues in your life, without being subjugated to ridicule, blaming, and disrespect for two years? I'm sure some of you did not feel those words describe your stay at MMS but I feel I was treated differently than the others. I was being pushed down instead of being pulled up.
   No one believed in me there, but a few of my friends and myself. Every day was a struggle against the faculty. They told me I was crazy. I had to go on meds. By the last few months of my stay I no longer prefered living over dying. I just didn't care.
   It's nothing like that anymore. My first week back home brought back the realization that life doesn't suck, but MMS does.

[Anonymous]

When were you there? Can you tell us more of your experiences there?

[Anonymous]

I was there from 02'-04', and to be honest I can barely remember those years even though it wasn't even a year ago that I left. I guess I kind of blocked it out. This Forum gives me a reason to remember though. I'm really glad I found this, even though a lot of people are pissed off at each other in hear. Still, no one can say that they had an opportunity while they were there to talk about the negative things MMS did. I need to get some things off my chest and I'm glad there's a place where poeple can relate to that even if they doin't agree with me. I'll write more details about my experience later when I've thought about it a little more. I just found this site last night.

[Anonymous]

When I said "hear", I meant "here".

[katfish]

welcome anony, i know the feeling.  I'm glad you have found something useful in this forum.  It's difficult to spend so much time not being able to speak your mind and then later only to be attacked for your opinions.  I think speaking your mind plays an important part in coming into your own.  Congrats on the 3 years, that's tough! I found it to be especially b/c MMS (and frankly) even AA say there's only one way to do it, their way- while in AA it's much easier to find people that don't suscribe verbatim to the program, MMS didn't afford us such an option.    I recently found smartrecovery.com which I really like- promotes self reliance, but cleaned up about 8 years ago on my own.
I always thought that there were few things more destructive about MMS than not being able to reveal your own truth and evolve on your own, this duality created.  On the one hand the person who had to go through the motion and convince herself as much as possible and agree with them,that this was the way and the only way- and then on the other hand that nugget of real me  grew smaller and smaller.  
Now that nugget though, however, has very much grown and here are my words and  my actions are very much in sync with my own truth.  The power of that truth, your truth, should not be underestimated.  The truth is very powerful- hell, it's the truth!  There's no doubt in my mind, obviously that for some MMS was very damaging and that poses a real problem for child advocates- they need more people like us to speak up.
Keep trying to sync up the two, you'll get their is you're not already!  For some out there, I believe, MMS semi-permatnently or permanently damaged and much will be left unrevealed and undealt with.  Others can't live with that lie...I'm here for you, should you need anything...I attended MMS in 92-94, many moons ago and have given this a great deal of thought- please don't hesitate to send me a provate message if you wish to discuss things further...
Best, kat