LIFE82 is clearly in a great deal of pain, has some serious issues with socialization skills, and has made it abundantly clear that they have not found a way to escape the personality traits induced by the high demand group in their own past.
I can only offer my hope that whoever this person is, they can find some sense of peace and understanding of what was done to them, and how it informs their behavior today. It is painful to me to read what this person writes, and if that gives them pleasure then I hope that I have helped them somehow.
This forum provides this person a safe outlet for their clear frustration with his/her own life and experience. Their expressions of anger, outrage and clear sense of loss are common in people who have been abused as children, it is not unexpected or shocking.
I for one take it as a clear reminder of how I behaved as little as two years ago, even earlier this year. It is not a pretty mirror, but it is one that is useful in measure.
There are
postings here with links to resource material, educational guides, and therapuetic support for those of us who choose to avail ourselves of such help. Some people are simply not ready to heal, a process referred to as 'keeping the wound open', and as such, are enboldened by the safety and anonymity of this forum to spew their unfocused rage and resentment at anyone willing to take the bait.
Accusation, resentment, rage, scapegoating, tranference, acting out, a pervasive sense of loss, agression, hate, disgust, repulsion, denial, frustration and self-loathing are all a part of the healing process, but they represent only the very early steps, and can commonly be eliminated via taking the more difficult and time consuming step of forgiveness, both of ourselves and others.
