That whole sewing joke makes me think of the little bit of competition betweed the 'guys' and the 'chicks.' I remember when I came in the Seed I thought it was really weird that the guys and girls sat on separate sides of the room. It seemed even weirder when I was an oldcomer and my only contact with the girls was playing football on the beach. We might say, 'good catch Mary!' or whatever but that was it. Sat on separate towels in separate sections.
I remember pretty intense raps when I was a newcomer about 'games' - basically, sex. It was pretty confrontational. It brought out a lot of shame for me, at 19 I had a very romantic view on relationships, but actually had been in a few that felt hurtful. I remember one staff member, Nona, who seemed to imply that she had been a hooker - 'there was nothing - NOTHING I wouldn't do to get high' I remember her saying and I'm thinking, whoa. That seemed pretty crazy, and she's crying and we're all crying and I'm basically feeling pretty bad about being male.
But later, it seemed that the guys and girls competed for Art's attention. Guys did 'guy' stuff, helped Art with his boat, dug ditches for the ball field, like that. Girls sewed stuff, painted, did crafts. The guys kind of made fun of that, but also, we were trying to feel better about being separate from the girls.
I remember John P. and Cindy dating. I remember how strange that was. They were the first I ever remember, and there were no Public Displays of Affection or anything like that. I worked with Randy who was married to Terry, but they were a long-established couple and Randy was an 'honorary' Seed kid, which meant the rules were different.
I remember being jealous of the Safecard crew, where guys and girls worked together. This was rare. It seemed like there were some friendships that came out of this. But for me, I lived and worked with guys exclusively.
I guess the end result of this was, on the plus side, we (guys) felt like we were good guys, treating women as equals, not objects. On the minus side, we had no relationships with women as friends, partners or in love.