The only hope for this drug-addled nation and the "dry druggies" who call themselves it's citizens is a radical redesign of the culture--what is needed is to turn the nation into one large Straight, Inc. "Big Group". That's right, druggies, America needs to be converted into a wholly-owned subsidiary of the new, improved, all-ages Straight, Inc. v2.0! Instead of a President, we would have an Executive Director (Me, of course) and instead of various bureaucracies and legislative bodies, we would have Executive, Senior, and Junior Staff. Imagine how much more efficient that would be. And the best part is everyone would be getting Straight! You wouldn't be able to vote until you Seven Stepped, and even then the only candidate would be me, so there would be none of that election year frivolity to distract you from the Program. I can't wait to see my first, hand-drafted copy of the Steps enshrined in the Smithsonian (which will be renamed the Sembler Institute) in place of that outmoded, useless piece of toilet paper, the Constitutioun. Only when America has embraced the philosophy that I set forth in my masterful treatise, "Gone Way Down- Teenage Drug Use Is A Disease" will society live up to it's potential. I think the first order of business will be to replace that vulgar English drinking song with "I Am Straight" as the national anthem. Then, we'll make food stamps good for only PBJs. After that, who knows? Maybe one day, I, Dr. Miller Newton, will be crowned Emperor of Earth! Oh what Serenity that would bring to the masses!