"Why did you call yourself that then? They never told you that you were "full of shit"? "
Call myself what? I don't recall anyone saying that I was "full of shit". I was certainly dishonest, and i was called on inconsistencies in my stories.
"So they didn't scream at you? They didn't control your every move, including where your eyes were looking at every moment? I would call that harsh, and way beyond uncomfortable. Demeaning and humiliating would be more accurate. "
No, never screamed at, in fact I did my fair share of yelling. My every move was far from controlled. I could look any where
I wanted. I agreed to abide by rules, and the further I went in AARC, the more these rules were relaxed.
"Well...straight had psychologists working there too, that doesnt mean they knew anything about communicating or being empathetic. What's wrong with "blaming" (notice this is another self deprecating remark) your parents for things they may have done wrong? Do you think that would mean you didn't love them? "
My parents made every attempt to talk to and listen to me. They were compassionate, generous and often overly trusting. They made mistakes, and I made choices. I never believed they didn't love me, and if I hadn't chosen to tell them I was still involved in drugs after they thought I was done, and I asked for help, they would have continued to love me. They were and are awesome people. Your interpretation sounds like you may be projecting your parental experience onto me.
"Your words are full of self-condemning remarks, that also happen to be the very same terms used in there. "
If "hardcore criminal" and "unclouded by years of drug use is self-condemning" then I am guilty. By the way, see below:
"What crimes were you committing? How often? How much money did you make? How old were you? "
MY RESUME OF CRIME
Age
12 - 21 possessed illegal drugs all the time
14 - 21 sale of illegal drugs
12 - 21 theft, possession of stolen goods, sale of stolen goods
16 kidnapping and extorsion (twice)
17 Break and Enter to Commit Assualt, Assault with a weapon
19 - 21 Cultivation of a Narcotic
17 - 21 Possession of illegal unregistered handguns
15 - 21 possession of prohibited weapons
20 home invasion, armed robbery
As to how much money I made, that is between me and the government. Suffice to say I supported myself, paid rent, bought food, paid bills from 16 - 21, travelled, used drugs and drank every day, paid for lawyers and fines and paid for all of it by proceeds of crime. Hence, hardcore career criminal.
