On 2004-06-13 21:48:00, shanlea wrote:
"OK. YOu are right. I don't understand, but I accept. We all got our own journey.
Still, you are articulate and funny, what if you wrote a dark comedy about your experience?
Also out of curiosity, do any of your CEDU friends view CEDU similarly or were they brainwashed? Laura? Hell?"
well, some of my "friends" at cedu m.s. were fairly brainwashed... actually, i had a few friends that i knew faked it really well.. but i don't think they told anyone; those middle skool kids were hardcore snitches. it's not something we really talked about, it was kinda like don't ask, i won't tell. the more i think about it, the more fakers i can remember. they were really good, well, some were not so good, but did it anyway. but, on the other hand, there were those poor kids who were particularly susceptible to their harsh demands. it depended on the past experiences of the kids; those who were just there for petty shit like fighting with their parents, who didn't understand how that much about human nature and social engineering, who usually got sucked in... these were usually younger kids. but then there were those who'd had some serious social issues (drugs, gang involvement, etc) before cedu, even really young kids, these kids were better fakers. toward the end, there were a lot more of these petty-shit kids, and a lot of them got duped. fortunately, i didn't fall into it at all (not even the inclination to fake it... damn, that just reminded me of something they used to tell us: "fake it till you make it. did you guys ever hear that one? i'm sure they knew a lot of these kids were faking it... but they didn't really care because they knew that they'd have internalized the shit.)
anyway, some of these kids weren't bright enough or advanced enough not to get brainwashed, but others were pretty convincing that they did. the middle skool was pretty intense; these kids would take the whole brainwashed thing, and even faking it, to a whole new level.. you'd never hear a high skooler scream at you about tucking in your shirt. and when these kids got brainwashed... like whoa.
most of the people i chilled with at the high skool were defiant and rebellious, the others were chameleons... they did what they felt they needed to do to get out. i think there were a couple truly brainwashed kids at the high skool (and i think they had really fucked up lives at home, like environments) but i can't really remember too many (then again, i can't remember a lot of those kids off the top of my head) and i wasn't friends with them; they were the people who'd jump down my throat about my bad attitude and behavior!
so, basically, all of my friends think the system is screwed like i do, but from very different perspectives. honestly, i think the chameleons end up werse than the rebels in the long run... like, we just had a miserable time while at the skool, but we'd resist. the others, well, they'd have to go along with it and pass it on... for some people, that's truly traumatizing.