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I wonder what farm is that?

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--- Quote from: "Gentlestormi_" ---While back, I came across the biography of Father Flanagan, of Boys Town, by Will Oursler. I read it and i had to read it slow and process my way through his story. At first i was a skeptic, being a survivor of a Roloff cult, but as i realized that Father Flanagan did things in direct opposite to Roloff, i realized the superiority of his system over Roloffs system. Flanagan refused any corporeal punishment, he would not force his doctrines either, respecting each childs familial heritage. I have heard that Father Flanagans Boys and Girls Towns are rated the highest in the Nation. The thing that stood out to me in contrast between Roloff and Father Flanagan was the one idea of "RESPECT" ....Flanagan respected each child and each childs reality and history. Roloff disrespected those sent to him and refused to see their individuality and disrespected their heritage that they came with. The other marking element between Flanagan and Roloff seemed to me (based only on my reading this biography and my personal knowlege of Roloff) was the aspect of conditional love in a Roloff type system versus unconditional love shown in a Flanagan type system.  I do not know any more about the Flanagan system other than what i learned from this biography. But i did talk to a person who is in media and i was told that Flanagans Boys Town and Girls Town are rated the highest in the USA.
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Discussion of Boys' Town continues in the following thread:

Father Flanagan's BOYS' TOWN (from "I wonder what farm...")

savethekids: ... ledge/list  

Please DONT HELP GET word out they are trying to get more money! they already get away with stealing money from parent to abuse the kids, CIRCLE OF HOPE director is able to get away with it all as he has connections with the local law enforcement! Also they are being supported by BEREAN BAPTIST church 417-833-1529 ! Please call and help open there eyes that they are not loving caring people just out to get more $$$$$$$! Documents of abuse are coming to light!

Anne Bonney:

--- Quote from: "Gentlestormi_" ---
--- Quote ---It could be Heaven's View...

      How often can I visit or phone my daughter?

      Initially contact with residents occurs after 30 days. Then, residents may receive calls from home every two weeks. However, this is contingent on the resident’s behavior. After 3 months, you may visit your daughter at the facility. However, this is contingent on the behavior and attitude of your daughter. After a designated time and with Board approval, your daughter may be eligible for a home visit.
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Everything in this excerpt seems to me to show that parental support is contingent only on the behavior of the child. The ones in power and control over parent and child is this authority of Heaven's View. There seems to me, to be an underlying assumption that the child must be punished by the removal of parental presence, and support, there seems to be to me, an underlying assumption that parental presence, support and love (which should be unconditional) is "contingent" upon the child's behavior--that they use this conditional idea that parental presence, parental support and parental intervention is based upon conditions and not based upon Gods idea of parental unconditional love. Setting up a inner reality that one is not of worth or value based upon ones outside behavior and ignoring of the inward reality, and setting up victims of this pattern to years of learned hypocritical living life.
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Wow...that's really interesting.  We were flat out told that we didn't deserve our parents and we had to 'earn' the right to speak to them again.

--- Quote ---I personally believe that the original problem does not lie within the child, the child may act out the baggage of the parents, but the origins of the problems lay within the system of the family of origins. I consider programs based in family systems to be the healthiest there are. Systems that include parents into therapy are healthier, but systems that block parents out and isolate the child as "the problem" are to me seen as extremely destructive and in the long term i feel are elements that destroy relationships and tear down trust, building false/fake relationship and relationship skills.
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Yeah, but that can be and very often is twisted too.  They had parent 'raps' at Straight but it was more scare tactics to reinforce the false idea that all kids who leave the program will DIE.  I watched it take otherwise sensible and caring parents and turn them into robotic versions of themselves who wouldn't dream of questioning any aspect of the program, no matter how cruel or absurd it was.  They were all told to "trust the process' and if they persisted further, were told to 'take their child and go home', which of course scared the hell out of them because by then they had been thoroughly indoctrinated into the whole deadinsaneorinjail mantra.

--- Quote ---It also seems to me that there is an assumption in the above excerpt that children behave in a vacuum: that what a child does has no cause and effect to it. This seeming underlying assumption that one can just cut off or cut out behaviors that have direct cause and effect to it, without helping process and understanding of the causes to the effects, are to me hallmarks of highly damaging mind control situations and experiences.
Mind control aka severe behavior rehab of such nature as this, cuts off understanding and process to this link of "cause and effect".
--There are reasons why that i personally feel need to be processed and understood, and in my opinion, any 'helping facility' that fails to do this and instead cuts off this process, is in my view, setting up this person for years of damaged relationships, major distortions and isolation from the very people God put there for them: Their father and mother.
--- End quote ---

Yup.  We (kids and parents alike) were told that the entirety of the individual teen's issues and the family problems were caused by the teens behavior, period.

We know that this so-called Christian boarding School was closed down but why?

We found this testimony from a mother:

--- Quote ---my son wants away from his father, he asked my mom if his house burnt down if he could come stay with her. my mom not thinking told him of course. he set the laundry room of their apartment on fire. after that his dad sent him out of the state to a military style camp. he wouldn't tell anyone where Justin was. my parents have played a very important role in my sons life, with me not being there, he became very close to my mom.
someone called social services on my son's dad again, and he blames my mom so now he's not allowed to see them. oh. by the way my parents fought to get my son out of the place his father sent him, it turned out to be on the F.B.I.'s watch list, "living water refuge" look it up it horrible. when the camp found out that ppl were coming to investigate they sent my son back on a plane that day. his dad was pissed.
he just severed me papers at work today. he says i'm in contempt for not paying his old attorney fees. him and his attorney have me going to court three times in one week. he sits at home on welfare so it's no big deal to him. i have to keep taking time off of work. all i want is to see my son. i don't want to fight with this *&&*V&*^. he's so mean to him, i know that a lot of this is my fault for my past actions, and the more he makes him suffer, the more it just kills me. i have to keep going numb inside or i real like i'm going to go insane. i've become this very angry person. i don't get it why this sweet, caring little boy's life has been nothing but pain. and the more anyone trys to help the worse we make it for him. i know that life isn't fair, but this is bullshit.

i just tried to go to the camps website and it's been permanently shut down. i can't even tell u the horrible things that there doing to boys there.

thanks for listing to my problems.

sometimes it feel like i'm dying inside when i think of the hell i helped to create for this little boy.

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