Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Aspen Education Group
My son at Aspen Ranch
Anonymous:
Wow, this thread has been thoroughly trolled by TheWho, who has exactly ZERO experience with AR. He's a mindless troll, people. He also fronts a group specifically created as an Aspen "feeder" business. All "pro" responses are a single industry shill, folks. You're getting suckered, OP.
TheWho:
--- Quote from: "psy" ---If all you're hearing is "this program saved my life and there is nothing negative there whatsoever", chances are there is a problem and you are being manipulated. Think about it. Even at the best schools and colleges reviews are mixed ("I liked this but this was so so and this I didn't care for very much").
--- End quote ---
Psy, surprisingly I agree with you on this 100% on this. I made almost the exact same statement awhile ago, but when I posted the same observation on the reverse I was slammed for it. Why wouldn’t it work both ways?
Example, If I change the words from your post and replace them with ruined, positive and isn’t does the statement still hold true?:
“If all you're hearing is "this program ruined my life and there is nothing positive there whatsoever", chances are there isnt a problem and you are being manipulated. Think about it. Even at the best schools and colleges reviews are mixed ("I liked this but this was so so and this I didn't care for very much").
If survivors come on to fornits and their stories contain nothing but negative comments (no positive experiences) then we can assume they are not telling the truth. This has always been a red flag with me.
NIGEL:
First of all, thank you to all that have responded. I want to say that I knew I would hear from people that supported the program and those that don't. I am listening to both sides and I appreciate the time you have taken to write back. I realize that there are those that have an axe to grind and they are going to be negative, as well as there are going to be people that answer these posts that have a vested interest in the program. I also know that there are a lot of people that are giving me their honest opinions and are truly trying to help( I am very appreciative of your help).
I came away with the following after our first visit:
Positives: Everyone I met and spoke with (therapists, teachers, staff) were professional and caring (I only base this on how we were treated). We took a tour of the facilities and they were clean. We got to go into the academic classrooms and we saw some art that the students had submitted to The Wayne County Art Show(there are some very talented artists at the ranch). My son was very proud of his submission and he spoke highly of his art teacher. I believe the equine program is a definite positive (my son claimed that he now loves horses). The last two reports we have received from the therapists claim my son is doing much better (my son agrees with this). Our relationship seemed better (albeit for only 4 hours over two days). He claims he doesn't hold any anger toward me or his Mom and he seemed less argumentative.
Negatives (or worries): I am not sure who to turn to to question whether The Aspen Ranch is a good fit for my son. They obviously have a vested interest in keeping him there. There is definitely some hazing amongst the students. My son feels he has zero privacy and that he is in a Jail like atmosphere. My son feels like if he badmouths the program, that he will be held back from graduating to the next level. He feels threatened at times by some of the other kids. He says there is a lot of negative energy around the place.
I am going back for my next visit the first week in October. I talked to my son about putting in his best effort in everything he does and he will eventually reap the benefits. I am obviously going to have to make a decision to either put trust in the ranch and leave him there, or pull him and bring him home. I am talking to many people from many different places, but ultimately, the decision is mine.
I want to state again that I value all of your opinions---please keep them coming.
Anonymous:
1/10
psy:
--- Quote from: "NIGEL" ---Positives: Everyone I met and spoke with (therapists, teachers, staff) were professional and caring (I only base this on how we were treated). We took a tour of the facilities and they were clean. We got to go into the academic classrooms and we saw some art that the students had submitted to The Wayne County Art Show(there are some very talented artists at the ranch). My son was very proud of his submission and he spoke highly of his art teacher. I believe the equine program is a definite positive (my son claimed that he now loves horses). The last two reports we have received from the therapists claim my son is doing much better (my son agrees with this).
--- End quote ---
Could that agreement have something to do with what you mentioned below (that he is afraid he will be held back if he disagrees with the program). Hypothetically, if your son was doing badly, I'm not sure he would feel free expressing it. Then again, if he feels free enough to express some bad things, he might actually be telling the truth. In the program I was in I had some positive experiences. I liked what we called "building trades" where we made furniture and... basically creative stuff. I felt it was a good relief from the nearly unbearable stress of the rest of the program. Despite these positive experiences, overwhelmingly, the program was not good for me at all and I feel like it did a lot of lasting damage. You can read about my experiences under my signature (click the one for Benchmark Young Adult School).
It could also be a desire to convince you that he's "better" in order to come home. Call it a manipulation but he might have very good reasons for wanting that.
--- Quote ---Our relationship seemed better (albeit for only 4 hours over two days). He claims he doesn't hold any anger toward me or his Mom and he seemed less argumentative.
--- End quote ---
Well. That sounds good, but I'm skeptical as to how legitimate equine therapy actually does and how many studies have actually shown it to be effective (or done at all). The only studies I could find were on heart rates and other stuff related to physical therapy. To me it seems more like a marketing gimmick riding on all that "Horse Whisperer" crap. This is the part where I tell you that where some programs aren't abusive, their completely ineffective, relying mostly on "feel good" tactics primarily targeted at winning over parents.
--- Quote ---Negatives (or worries): I am not sure who to turn to to question whether The Aspen Ranch is a good fit for my son. They obviously have a vested interest in keeping him there. There is definitely some hazing amongst the students. My son feels he has zero privacy and that he is in a Jail like atmosphere. My son feels like if he badmouths the program, that he will be held back from graduating to the next level. He feels threatened at times by some of the other kids. He says there is a lot of negative energy around the place.
I am going back for my next visit the first week in October. I talked to my son about putting in his best effort in everything he does and he will eventually reap the benefits. I am obviously going to have to make a decision to either put trust in the ranch and leave him there, or pull him and bring him home.
--- End quote ---
That's basically what it comes down to. My only comment on that would be that you shouldn't have to trust the ranch. If communication with your child is unrestricted and he doesn't feel "held back" by saying anything negative about the program, you can trust that what he says is what is happening. On the other hand, if the program restricts communication and punishes him directly or indirectly for relaying negative experiences, you can't really trust what either he or the program has to say. This is the primary reason I have such a problem with programs who either censor or monitor communication, directly or indirectly (through asking parents what was talked about).
--- Quote ---I want to state again that I value all of your opinions---please keep them coming.
--- End quote ---
You're welcome.
You mentioned he was talked to by a substance abuse counselor. Do you really think that's appropriate considering he was just using pot and LSD? I'm not suggesting you condone it, but I think you might be painting use as abuse in your own mind. You might want to read this article from Stanton Peele on that:
http://www.peele.net/lib/panic.html
As he notes, the problem with labeling a person an "addict" is that they take on the identity and it leads to relapses and habitual use. If you tell a person they can't control themselves and are powerless, they'll become just that. It's a sort of institutionalization of the same sort common to criminals... who take on the identity of "convict" and feel like they can do nothing else. Even worse in many programs kids are pressured or even forced to take on the moniker of "addict" in order to progress in the program. Peele, in the above article, lays out some practical suggestions for dealing with kids using drugs. He recommends against institutionalization.
Some more reading on the disease concept of addiction here:
http://www.peele.net/lib/diseasing3.html
Even kids who use certain substances on a daily basis are not destined to use it throughout their lives. The vast majority moderate or quit entirely. Addiction is not a progressive and fatal disease. It's simply a pattern of behavior that can be controlled if you teach your kids self control and self discipline.
--- Quote ---Several surveys conducted by Kaye Fillmore, of the Institute for Health and Aging (University of California, San Francisco), indicate that drinking problems that appear in college and late adolescence — problems up to and including blackout — rarely persist through middle age.36 Exactly similar data pertain to youthful drug abuse, and all research shows the tendency to use, to use regularly, and to be addicted to drugs drops off after adolescence and early adulthood.37 Apparently, as people mature they find they can achieve more meaningful rewards than those offered by drugs and overdrinking. These rewards are generally the conventional ones of family life and accomplishment at work that dominate adult life for most people, even most of those who had a drinking or drug problem earlier on.
--- End quote ---
So what it comes down to for you is which is the greater of two risks: leaving him in a program where he may be psychologically scarred, or taking him home and taking the risk that he might turn in to some junkie. I urge you to actually research the likelihood of both. On the one hand there have been studies done on the drug issue. On the other hand, there have been no double blind studies done on programs at all (ask yourself why not). That being said, if you've heard the anecdotal evidence that I've heard from interviewing scores of people from many different programs, it doesn't paint an overall positive picture.
Do your own research. Go to the MySpace and Facebook groups and ask around. Talk to multiple kids and compare what they have to say. If they're all making stuff up their stories won't match, but I'll wager they will.
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