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Author Topic: Former Parent of an HLA student  (Read 3134 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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Former Parent of an HLA student
« on: February 13, 2009, 12:05:44 PM »
I understand how desperate HLA parents feel because their kids were spinning out of control before they sent them there. I felt the same way. When my child was there, I wanted to believe in HLA, and wanted to believe they were honest and genuine, but they are NOT. I feel more sorry for the desperate parents who spend all that money for their child to stay at HLA, only to find out when they take their child out at the end of the program, they go right back to how they were acting before HLA and worse.

It is only something you find out after your child is already there, and you open your eyes to what is really going on. Take off your ROSE COLORED GLASSES and really don't get played like we did.
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2009, 02:37:23 PM »
How did your kid behave, before and after?

before the program my kid was just an angsty pothead that would throw tantrums and was unable to keep any friends for more than a few weeks, and forget about girls! he had no social skills.

When he got back he just started smoking more pot, in addition to picking up ciggarettes and alchohol and dabbling in harder drugs. he also turned into a very, very skilled thief but he'd only steal from freinds and family
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #2 on: February 16, 2009, 03:54:17 PM »
She was much worse when she got out than she was before she went to HLA. All that money spent for nothing. Every child that was in her peer group from HLA is doing bad also.
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Offline TheWho

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #3 on: February 16, 2009, 04:29:09 PM »
8/10
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #4 on: February 16, 2009, 05:25:50 PM »
Yup every kid in my son's peer group did pretty bad too. out of the 16 or so that started in the beginning, only 7 remained upon graduation.  

2 (one being my son) made it to college, and after a some trouble are both doing OK right now.
3 girls are now married (happily i hope), but never made it to college. They all got married before they even turned 21, two to soldiers.
One girl just kinda coasted along...still coasting along with part-time jobs and living in a dingy apartment.
the final individual, a boy, found his dream job after grad, never went to college, and lost his job within months because he was extremely emotionally unstable. He was a unique case - HLA did not treat his problems, and was only able suppress them through the rigid daily structure and supervision. once that structure was removed (he was also 19 at grad and went straight to living on his own), he just fell apart.


as far as the kids who were pulled, the success rates are about the same. A few made it to college and after some mistake-making and  turned out OK. the rest made bad choices and are living unsuccessful lives now.
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2009, 03:19:56 PM »
I hope you mean that you are a parent of a former HLA student, and not a former parent. HLA has lots of problems, but it's hard to take you seriously when you generalize. It's probably okay to associate HLA with its leadership, but some of the staff at HLA are honest and genuine, and some are not. Some graduates act the same as before their attendance, and some do not.
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2009, 11:27:25 AM »
I am still a parent, I just meant I had a child who is a former student of HLA. I am speaking about our experience at HLA. There are a few good staff members, but lots of them are full of it. They lie like DOGS and present the school as something that it is NOT. The education the children get there is a joke. It is a big money game with dishonest people in charge. I can tell you that not even one teen in our peer group has done worth a ---- while at HLA. They still are not doing WOS.
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2009, 10:27:18 PM »
I will tell you from the source - having been a student at HLA for an entire program - it is quite rare to see a kid doing great things after graduating.  I know the things I was doing before I got sent there and I am also fully aware of the things I am now doing in college...nothing really changed - I'm a lot better at getting away with it though.  I'd be happy to answer any questions anyone has on here....
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #8 on: April 11, 2009, 10:36:54 AM »
How long ago were you at HLA?
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Offline Lacey

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #9 on: April 21, 2009, 11:07:10 AM »
The mindset is still there... Manipulate.. lie.. Run, run, run... Now I just have things to lose. I can't afford to indulge in the behavior anymore. I'm much better at keeping up appearences, but everything suffered. Kicked out of college, working a shitty bank job, married and a mother to a wonderful 2 year old. But its not what I wanted for myself. Expectations were so high, even my own. I don't write anymore, paint, or any of the creative things I used to thrive off of. I should be grateful... At least I survived it. But its always there. HLA taught me nothing, and changed nothing. All I know is to never let anyone know. Its so much easier that way.
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Offline Dysfunction Junction

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #10 on: January 14, 2011, 03:11:20 PM »
This thread has some parent feedback about HLA, Whooter.

Quote from: "Guest"
I understand how desperate HLA parents feel because their kids were spinning out of control before they sent them there. I felt the same way. When my child was there, I wanted to believe in HLA, and wanted to believe they were honest and genuine, but they are NOT. I feel more sorry for the desperate parents who spend all that money for their child to stay at HLA, only to find out when they take their child out at the end of the program, they go right back to how they were acting before HLA and worse.

It is only something you find out after your child is already there, and you open your eyes to what is really going on. Take off your ROSE COLORED GLASSES and really don't get played like we did.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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"Compassion is the basis of morality."

-Arthur Schopenhauer

Offline Dysfunction Junction

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #11 on: January 14, 2011, 03:13:35 PM »
Quote from: "parent99"
Yup every kid in my son's peer group did pretty bad too. out of the 16 or so that started in the beginning, only 7 remained upon graduation.  

2 (one being my son) made it to college, and after a some trouble are both doing OK right now.
3 girls are now married (happily i hope), but never made it to college. They all got married before they even turned 21, two to soldiers.
One girl just kinda coasted along...still coasting along with part-time jobs and living in a dingy apartment.
the final individual, a boy, found his dream job after grad, never went to college, and lost his job within months because he was extremely emotionally unstable. He was a unique case - HLA did not treat his problems, and was only able suppress them through the rigid daily structure and supervision. once that structure was removed (he was also 19 at grad and went straight to living on his own), he just fell apart.


as far as the kids who were pulled, the success rates are about the same. A few made it to college and after some mistake-making and  turned out OK. the rest made bad choices and are living unsuccessful lives now.

Not a very good track record with these kids.  I'm glad HLA got shut down.
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"Compassion is the basis of morality."

-Arthur Schopenhauer

Offline FreeOfCC

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #12 on: January 18, 2011, 11:56:05 PM »
Quote from: "Lacey"
The mindset is still there... Manipulate.. lie.. Run, run, run... Now I just have things to lose. I can't afford to indulge in the behavior anymore. I'm much better at keeping up appearences, but everything suffered. Kicked out of college, working a shitty bank job, married and a mother to a wonderful 2 year old. But its not what I wanted for myself. Expectations were so high, even my own. I don't write anymore, paint, or any of the creative things I used to thrive off of. I should be grateful... At least I survived it. But its always there. HLA taught me nothing, and changed nothing. All I know is to never let anyone know. Its so much easier that way.

Lacey, if you're still around, can you elaborate on your take on what about HLA caused this. You are not the first to report a loss of interest in things that used to bring joy. I have witnessed it. Also the emotional isolation, as if they have been conditioned to be an island unto themselves- never trouble anyone with their wants/needs/fears/even their dreams. A reluctance to engage on an intimate level. As if they are supposed to exist on the periphery in their families.

Appreciating the courage you demonstrate by sharing your story.
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Offline Anne Bonney

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #13 on: January 19, 2011, 12:18:49 PM »
:bump:
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traight, St. Pete, early 80s
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The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents-- because they have a tame child-creature in their house.  ~~  Frank Zappa

Offline Dysfunction Junction

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Re: Former Parent of an HLA student
« Reply #14 on: January 19, 2011, 12:53:05 PM »
I can't speak for Lacey and don't presume to.  However, I have had several long conversations with both Lacey and her mom about HLA and it quite literally destroyed their family.  Last we spoke I was providing documentation that was intended for a lawsuit.  When HLA went bankrupt I think they shelved the idea.  "Blood from stone," you know?
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"Compassion is the basis of morality."

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