One reason I posted this thread was that I simply cannot recall in vivid detail what happened in these things.
I remember before each propheet we had worked a full day, sometimes we did raps, so we were plenty tired when they took us inside after the house went to bed.
The first thing that always seemed to happen was a cop-put session that seemed to never end and was often full of the most disgusting revelations. The sex with animals is something I will never, ever forget. And the people copping out seemed to relish in describing in explicit detail exactly what they did to the animals.
Having never been exposed to this sort of sexual behavior, nor ever wanted to know about, I found it stomach turning. The cop-out sessions, oddly, did not seem like preludes to punishments, but rather just a long period of time going around and around the circle until everyone had their dirt out. And some had to just keep going. I remember in two propheets, the older students who came along for the ride were the ones who finally had to be told, enough!
In the Truth, they talked about the Chrome Ball, and I remember Tim Brace drawing it on one of those cheap art paper books as a large circle, which was then continuously drawn over with lines and scratches to represent the dirt and baggage we all carried around with us from birth, dirtying our pristine balls.
The entire propheet, as I recall, focused on the negative. Nothing at all positive.
Exhausted after 24 hours of the repeptive crap, we walked up to the house and told the world how great we felt, while being deliberately vague so as not to let anyone know what went on. A secret ritual.
Later came the Children's. I remember some children's songs, endless crying, and I think it was about getting in touch with our little child that we left behind on our path to becomming grown ups. Which is usually what you do in life, and acting like a 4 year old when you are 30 or 40, doesn't go over too well in the world. During the reunion or whatever it was the next day, we got to play with Hot Wheels. Admittedly, mine was the coolest.
Then I think we did the Brother's Keeper. Having to do with friendships. I think we talked about how we sell out on our friends, but I don't remember how that was done, or what we were doing when we talked about it. We all had to pick a friend to go through it with, and then we were continuously yelled at by everyone, even people who knew nothing of the relationship, that we were dishonest, sellouts. What went on for the other 23 hours I have no idea, but I am pretty sure it was all preceded by a lengthy copout sessions as all propheets had those at the start.
The I want to Live... All I know is we were all inches away from killing ourselves, the Chrome Ball I think was brought out again, and there was something called the Pendulum where we all fought to stand closest to Death because that is where we were all heading. Such a positive experience.
The Dream was a blur to me. I would guess we talked about what we had always wanted to be, and how we had sold out on our dreams and how we should pursue them.
Afterwards we started working on our Challenge Night, where we would perform 2 or 3 events that were supposed to be outside of our "comfort zones" which tended to be chosen by Caroline Wolfe who loved to be as sadistic as possible in choosing who did what. Guys typically wound up in tights doing ballet in front of the school, shy people had to give speaches or sing. Public embarassment at its finest. I did a Waltz, was the Master of Ceremonies for the night because someone felt talking in front of people was a challenge for me. And I had to coordinate everyone's skits as though management was a tough task for me. My waltzing partner was a cake walk because I had a staff member who loved them, was 800 years older than Yoda so grew up when dancing was common, and owned every waltz album produced by mankind. And some aliens I believe.
Next came the Imagine. I imagine it was important at the time, but I can't for the life of me recall what went on aside from hearing John Lennon singing the same song over and over and over again.
The I and Me workshop and the Summit blur together for me as well. Not sure what things happened in which one. I remember a trip to Spokane where we were given a few bucks and were told to do something nice for someone. I bought a Bicyclist a soda, my favorite, he declined, so I was forced to prevent its waste. Then I went to a movie and waited for the time to run out. Because I remembered that the rules were vague as to who could benefit from our generosity.
I vividly recall something called the Life Boat trial. Where we were placed in a circle, given three imaginary life boats, told we were on an outting together and the ship had sunk 20 miles from shore and we could only give out three life boats to save whom we chose to.
Everyone took this so seriously you would think people were actually going to die. I didn't get a single life boat. Oh well. Good thing I can swim 20 miles. They didn't take into account that 15 desperate people and 3 lifeboats probably meant the guy with the lifeboats wasn't going to make it. I gave all mine away. Just in case I had misinterpreted that Spokane trip...
The workshops took forever. There was minimal food, precious little sleep, and Mare Dubivich took great personal pleasure constantly adjusting the room temperature to freeze or broil everyone, slyly removing coats or sweaters draped over chairs then opening the doors and windows and turning off the heat. To not call that psychological manipulation, and Guantanamo style torture.... Well, they do it there too. I guess it gets you to talk and cooperate. Glad nobody got put on a leash and photographed.
I also remember in one of these there was some kind of physical threat situation, where we had to stand in front of our partner and were told that when the moment came, we were supposed to hit them as hard as we could. I remember feeling a bit uneasy about this. I knew what was going to happen because it was just too drawn out and the acting was so poor it was blatantly clear we were going to hug the person. Naturally everyone was concerned about breaking the agreements and the staff said the agreements were suspended in the workshop. Something they kept pointing out in order to get us wondering. But what worried me most was that it was like 3am, nobody had slept more than two winks in a day, and some were having trouble just standing, and if anyone missed the command or simply assumed Tim had said strike the person, some people were going to get clocked. And I was pretty sure if my partner missed the message and hit me, he was going down the stairs to the Denali Lodge head first. Afterall, the agreements were suspended.
And that is all I remember. And that is why I made this post. Those propheets embodied the strange teachings and methods used to mess with our minds, and so I feel they are important enough to catalog and recall in some detail so we know what we experienced. The fact most of this was conducted during a period of sleep deprivation, I have been concerned it hit our subconscious more than anything else so perhaps that is why it is so hazy and mau have affected us more than we know.
Well, that's my two cents.
